COMRADES!

It has come to my attention that one of our newer members is a spy, saboteur, informant, and anti-revolutionary! It is always troubling when I find of these low life malcontents. I often wonder why? Was it a failure of the parents? Were they not progressive enough? Did they make him 'earn' his allowance? Not block The Fox News channel on their TV? Or was it a failure of the system? Should we perchance start them in the Gulag at an earlier age?
*sigh*
(gazes reflectively into the distance....)
Huh? Oh! Right!!

This one among us called Chedoh has engaged in THOUGHTCRIME!!!!

-I have on occasion caught him reading 'Arguing with Idiots' by Glenn Beck!!! When confronted he became agitated and screamed, "I JUST FOUND IT ON THE FLOOR!!! I WAS GOING TO TURN IT INTO THE MINISTRY OF TRUTH FOR PROPER DISPOSAL!!!" And then ran screaming into a closet.

-When presented with sacks of OPM for redistribution he did not take a disproportionate cut for his services.

-He has a picture of Ronald Reagan in his wallet!!

-He thinks Ann Coulter is "kinda cute"!

-When asked what he thinks of Uber Comrade Obama's (PBUH) tax policy his reply was, "I think trickle down economics would far better fix the current econom....wait!! I mean!!" and then he went screaming into the nearest closet.

I have testimony from his neighbor, Edna Grznewski, who has seen Chedoh on multiple occasions eating live kittens with George Bush and Dick Cheney!!!

This enemy of the people must not be allowed to pollute our collective any longer!! As we speak there are agents, TRUE believers in the Revolution, out gathering more information on the subversive activities of this...this....CAPITALIST!!!

All shall be revealed during the show trial, which we should commence post haste. After which Chedoh shall be relocated to the nearest Obama Educational Facility for Progressive Thought and Knitting.

These are the charges humbly submitted 6 May in the year of Obama 2010.

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

Don't forget, Chedoh thinks he can "change" Tammy Bruce! The audacity of that hope!

My concern was that he was going to attack the outraged attention of the food police. Aren't Cheetos banned?
But, a picture of Radical Reagen? Unspeakable! I expect the same detailed, through explanations as we get from our glorious sub-leaders in the Democrat House!

I have new evidence comrades!!

One of my investigators has unearthed this photo of a Tea Party rally in Washington DC in which Chedoh can clearly be seen taking part in this subversive hate-mongering racist warpig seditious religious group!!

And at the 1964 Republican National Convention!!!

The horror!!

My informant assures me there are more incriminating pictures to come but she needs a nap and more crayons more time to fully analyze the photos.

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

I am most disturbed by recent email photo sent to my private Cubers account. I hate jumping to conclusions, but here is more mounting evidence that Chedoh, our beloved Cheeto man, might not be who he appears to be (not meaning a 'Cheeto', but a reichwing (spit spit) subversiveness).
I will leave discretion & discernments up to individual individuals.


Obama tell!, how can so many clear photos be discounted?

Comrade O'Brien,

Are you certain Comrade Chedoh was not in fact reading studying this tome?

By the way, I am certain Beck stole from The Messiah!

Respectfully submitted,

Comrade Putout

Comrade Putout,

Yes I am quite certain, for it was Uber Comrade's book why would he scream and run away so?

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

More distressing news! I witnessed Comrade Chedoh after running screaming when caught reading Glenn Beck's book, return hours later from sobbing in his closet with a copy of GOING ROGUE! YES! HE WAS IN HIS CLOSET SOBBING AND GOING AT IT SEC STYLE WITH PICTURES OF PALIN! Oh the horrors! On top of that, I have it on good authority that instead of vodka and beets, he has TEA and BACON for breakfast!

Comrades I have found a photo of Che'doh with his CIA handler. The photo also discloses a link with the Japanese intelligence service, Naichō (内調, an abbreviation for Naikaku Jōhō Chōsashitsu 内閣 情報 調査室.

According to information in our files his Japanese code name is Wassabi Mayo.

I decline to speak until I am represented by a attorney of the people! These wild accusations are false! I have done nothing but give my full dedication to our glorious cause! Believe me comrades, I spit after every time I say "Glenn Beck" *spits*

My Comrades

The Zimbabwean Intelligence Agency has come across evidence that there is indeed a very intimate link between Glenn Beck and Cheedos!

Since Betty isn't here to say it...



Ewwwww

My Comrades

I think Chedohs crimes against the people are numerous, but there may be reasons for his anger.
--He may have lost his house due to foreclosure.
--He may be a Hispanic Looking Person in Arizona
--He may be Muslim
--He may be gay
--He may not be a He at all
--He may have been forced by George Bush to watch Fox against his will without the protection of the Party Approved Tinfoil Hat, and got indoctrinated by Beck against his will.

So before the People's Court sentences him to End of Life Counselling, may I suggest that a thorough investigation is launched into why this has happened.

We will probably find that GW Bush is to blame.

Amandla!

Obamugabe

Gasp! An orgie with Glenn Beck (spits) himself!

Chedoh - Are you this O. Chedoh?

If so - what does the O stand for?

Respectfully submitted,

Comrade Putout

Cradle to Grave Marxist wrote:Since Betty isn't here to say it...

Ewwwww

C2G, you don't know the half of it. The caption that went along with that picture was "Her vagina, it's dangerously cheesy."

And now it's my turn to say Eeeew!

(Mmmmmm, cheese)

Obamugabe, before I averted my eyes, I upchucked in my mouth a bit. Now, feeling most faint.

Comrade Whoopie wrote:

Cradle to Grave Marxist wrote:Since Betty isn't here to say it...

Ewwwww

C2G, you don't know the half of it. The caption that went along with that picture was "Her vagina, it's dangerously cheesy."

And now it's my turn to say Eeeew!

(Mmmmmm, cheese)

Comrade Whoopie

I am shocked that you chose this one cheesy caption out of hundreds available.

I will have to check its factuality with the Zimbabwe Bureau of Intelligence.

Obamugabe

Comrades, all your faces should be as red as Marx's blood from embarrassment for slandering me! No better than the dreadful tea parties!

Yes I may have a Glenn Beck *spits* book, but I was only studying the enemy to know their ways and destroy them from the inside out. Now my cover is blown, the enemy will remain strong and greedy! I demand these outrages charges be dropped!

Comrade Putout wrote:Chedoh - Are you this O. Chedoh?

If so - what does the O stand for?

Respectfully submitted,

Comrade Putout

HA, I HAVE YOU!

My full name is "Chedoh Fretolaray", Not O. Chedoh! This evidence is debunked!

Now please remove this awful man's face from our glorious forum!

Chedoh wrote:Comrades, all your faces should be as red as Marx's blood from embarrassment for slandering me! No better than the dreadful tea parties!

Yes I may have a Glenn Beck *spits* book, but I was only studying the enemy to know their ways and destroy them from the inside out. Now my cover is blown, the enemy will remain strong and greedy! I demand these outrages charges be dropped!

This is as glorious an explanation as I've heard, including our trustworthy, benevolent Congress... and beside, how doesn't love Cheeto's?!!!

Comrades!

I have mountains of evidence convicting Chedoh beyond a shadow of a doubt. But instead of going through it all I move, for expediency sake, to commence with sentencing. After all the seriousness of the charges against Chedoh warrant a trip to the re-education facility. There any evil thoughts will be purged from his mind through glorious toiling with the People's Shovel ™.

In lieu of voting I will just deem this motion passes, better known as the Slaughter Rule.

Summon the NKVD so that Chedoh may begin his mind scrubbing!!

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

As we all know, it's not the evidence, but the seriousness of the charges that demands action. And these are serious charges. Fortunately Che'doh is not being accused of a hanging offense. A little trip to the gulag and maybe a Jiffy-Lobo never killed anyone...mostly.

And after his release he'll be so grateful to (and fearful of) the Party™ that his loyalty will be unquestioned. Have a nice trip Che'doh and bring me back a T-shirt (size M).

Comrades, Chedoh is also selling drugs to little kiddies!

PROOF!!!

And now we see Chedoh before he went to Canada for cosmetic surgery when he knows Healthcare is free in the USA thanks to his O'liness. More proof of his treacherousness!

Reiuxcat, just look at the influence he's had on our children.

(Picture courtesy of Big Fur Hat)

Ah, my little puff of Chedoh, you must come clean and love the party even more than yourself. Even Che shoveled earth, usually when there was down time between executions. Che could have puffed up his own vain glory as a leader, but he'd rather shovel than fix the country's industry for his own glory.



Ooops, how did Chedoh's Beck video get in here?

Here, learn to shovel earth, Chedoh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvz2ae6 ... r_embedded#!



Confession is good for the soul, even if you aren't guilty, or if you are soulless; just make sure that you really mean your confession.

Comrade O'Brien can help you to really believe the Party Line and learn to love the Leader more than life itself. Just ask O'Brien to set you free with his therapy--the new health care covers his sessions.

Cradle to Grave Marxist wrote:
Confession is good for the soul, even if you aren't guilty, or if you are soulless; just make sure that you really mean your confession.

Comrade O'Brien can help you to really believe the Party Line and learn to love the Leader more than life itself. Just ask O'Brien to set you free with his therapy--the new health care covers his sessions.

Perhaps you are right, if it is the party's ™ will, I will confess to what ever charges in order to cleanse my self of even the smallest trace of self awareness or reasonable self interest. I have done my share of planning executions of public enemies, but only now do I see that I am actually one of them. Comrades, it is a heavy heart that I will be taking off my Che Beret(C) until my re-education is completed to Comrade O'Brien's satisfaction. I will pack and head to the train station. I feel bad for not feeling as guilty as I should. I should feel as depressed as the Cheese Cake girl, but I don't. I hope my stay at the peoples gulag will fix that.

Comrade Chedoh, there may be yet Hope(TM) for you. Your initial schedule at gulag is as follows.
0100 hours to 1200 hours; labor in the beet fields while listening to inspirational socialist messages broadcast via loundspeakers.
1200 to 1215; breakfast and bathroom break.
1215 to 1800 ; listen to inspirational socialist messages while digging in beet fields.
1800 to 1830; lunch, dinner and bathroom break (see, you get TWO meals at the same time, behold the compassion of true socialism)
1830 to 1930; clean barracks while listening to inspirational socialist messages
1930 to 0100; sleep while dreaming of inspirational socialist messages.

With effort and proper self denunciation, a comrade may earn as much as an extra 30 minutes of sleep!

It helped me, that and the Jiffy Lobo--

just don't leave me with Bruno and Our Wonderful To Worship MTE again...

*sob*

Colonel 7.62 wrote:Comrade Chedoh, there may be yet Hope(TM) for you. Your initial schedule at gulag is as follows.
0100 hours to 1200 hours; labor in the beet fields while listening to inspirational socialist messages broadcast via loundspeakers.
1200 to 1215; breakfast and bathroom break.
1215 to 1800 ; listen to inspirational socialist messages while digging in beet fields.
1800 to 1830; lunch, dinner and bathroom break (see, you get TWO meals at the same time, behold the compassion of true socialism)
1830 to 1930; clean barracks while listening to inspirational socialist messages
1930 to 0100; sleep while dreaming of inspirational socialist messages.

With effort and proper self denunciation, a comrade may earn as much as an extra 30 minutes of sleep!

I can almost feel the blisters on my hands as I speak! I only deserve the "best" treatment I can get because while I was driving my smart car today, I wished for something with a tad bit more room. Then I did some work for money, this serves me right, when can I start? But better yet I will write this first in hope to become a true progressive!


I Chedoh Fretolara, hereby denounce my self for desiring vehicles that have more space and will to work for money. There are plenty of people out there with entitlement who would like nothing more than for me to hand out my earnings to them, while they sat on their ass and waited for me to do so. I have failed to do this. I have also on more than one occasion, questioned Dear Leader's motive and abilities to a small degree. I also sort of thought Sarah Palin had some good ideas at some times. From here on out, I promise to shovel beet fields until I do it mindlessly and drool while day dreaming of how lucky I am to live in such a progressive state, I solemnly swear to have no more desires or wants other than more power for the party ™. I will from now on think that Comrade Pelosi is beautiful beyond words despite her face being mostly plastic, and that her and all progressives are infallible and above being questioned. I will understand my place as being less equal than party leaders and officials. I will also watch "A Inconvenient Truth" multiple times a day on my pedal powered television set, and give it a standing ovation even in the privacy of my own barrack when it is over. Also just like in the old Iraqi leadership, before it was ruined by Bushitler, every time I hear dear leaders name I will clap enthusiastically. This I promise in the glory and name of the all knowing Barack Obama who is keeping a close eye on me for my own good.


I feel so fortunate to have such loving Comrades who will beat me down aggressively for even the smallest infraction.

*sniffs*

Yo!

Right on right on, bro. Ya' be down fo duh struggle.


Peep dis sheeit. Have ah drink ah juoose wid me.

(The Gourds' Austin City version: Rated Mature )




Da Peeps' Rapper
Comrade C2G босяк

And makin' thugs out you suckas.
From the cradle to the grave.

Cradle to Grave Marxist wrote:

Yo!

Right on right on, bro. Ya' be down fo duh struggle.


Peep dis sheeit. Have ah drink ah juoose wid me.




Da Peeps' Rapper
Comrade C2G босяк

And makin' thugs out you suckas.
From the cradle to the grave.

I would take that offer, but I need to use my designated sleep time in my schedule lovingly crafted by 7.62 and other thoughtful commissars!

I will return tomorrow during my break from the beet fields! Even though that they are too good for me.

It is good you have confessed citizen Chedoh.

Now you can begin your re-education!

Lets look in on him shall we?


Here he is arriving at the gulag. Ahh such wonderful memories. It's like summer camp! Without the summer. Or the tents. Or fire or hot dogs or stories or fun or swimming. But they do have shovels! Yes indeed!


Speaking of shovels here we see Chedoh toiling away in the balmy steppe. Might we have a future shock worker on our hands? We'll see!


And after a satisfying day of toiling for the State here we see Chedoh relaxing with his fellow citizens. Discussing, I'm sure, the glorious policies of Obama and how blessed they are to have been accepted to one of his re-education centers. (Chedoh is being shy behind the last pole)

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

With every drop of sweat and blood, I become more and more enlightened. I can now memorize the repeating messages on the speakers here by heart, I even hear them when they are not playing, I hear them in my dreams that are about Obama. Now I know, THIS is freedom!

Does this come with a certificate or diploma at the end of my stay? Saying I have truly become enlightened or something?

Certificate?!

You wish for a symbol of accomplishment?! Something to elevate you above the masses perchance???

HALF RATIONS!!!!

We will make a comrade out of you yet....

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

Comrade Chedoh

When you love Obama more than your own miserable proletarian life, when you are ready to blow yourself up for the Greater Good, when you have absolutely no desire but to Sacrifice everything for Your Leader, then maybe you will be released.

But probably not.

The Soylent Corporation needs you.

Sorry Comrades, I guess I just need harder work and less free time. I still desire recognition for accomplishments, maybe my Commissar will kindly beat that out of me.

Comrade Chedoh

Repeat after me:

"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"
"All accomplishments are Equal and belong to the Collective!"

And so on, and so on.

Amandla!

Obamugabe

O'Brien wrote:Certificate?!

You wish for a symbol of accomplishment?! Something to elevate you above the masses perchance???

HALF RATIONS!!!!

We will make a comrade out of you yet....

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

Actually I may have to disagree with you Comrade O'Brien. A certificate is really not out of line. Consider that Mother Russia gave out medals and awards for just about anything possible. Meeting farm production quota, exceeding farm production quota, being a good miner, staying alive as a miner, etc... However the fact that Comrade Chedoh had to ask for one is disturbing. He still shows independent thought. Therefore his Hero of Gulag Labor medal and coupon for 1 percent off his next ObamaCare appointment should be withheld.

You are correct Colonel. What I object to is his ASKING for one. Those glorious individuals that were given medals by Mother Russia practically had to have them forced upon them since they did not want any special recognition. They did not go running about begging for symbols of accomplishment in the way of the Chedoh.

In fact, I move that from this moment forth such acts of begging for medals or symbols of accomplishment shall henceforth be known as 'pulling a Chedoh'!

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

Hmmm, perhaps the Party™ has been remiss in not crafting a certificate (suitable for being framed later) of survival accomplishment for those who've been rehabilitated by a stay in the gulag.

I'll look into the matter (if I ever sober up enough to work my photoshop thing-a-mabob).

O'Brien wrote:You are correct Colonel. What I object to is his ASKING for one. Those glorious individuals that were given medals by Mother Russia practically had to have them forced upon them since they did not want any special recognition. They did not go running about begging for symbols of accomplishment in the way of the Chedoh.

In fact, I move that from this moment forth such acts of begging for medals or symbols of accomplishment shall henceforth be known as 'pulling a Chedoh'!

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

Sorry comrades! I'm still a failure to Obama... I will never be worthy of even gazing at his Hope and Change ™ posters. What am I to do? I shovel all day and labor here at the peoples gulag and still I have capitalist motives. Am I a lost cause? I am overcome with remorse and guilt...

Try standing in front of an Israeli bulldozer. It did wonders for my standing in the progressive community.

I agree Comrade O'Brien. The prole Chedoh does not deserve a certificate after asking for one. Although, I believe he may be entitled to one for "most thoughtcrimes in a day and still alive".

Chedoh wrote: Sorry comrades! I'm still a failure to Obama... I will never be worthy of even gazing at his Hope and Change ™ posters. What am I to do? I shovel all day and labor here at the peoples gulag and still I have capitalist motives. Am I a lost cause? I am overcome with remorse and guilt...

This is glorious progressive. A true Made Progressive should be overcome with remorse and guilt. That is the Progressive Way! If we were not filled with hopelessness and guiltiness of being, we could not be progressive bound.
Gaze into dear Leaders Hope . . . gaze and learn! Be filled with true remorse; let guilt have it's way with you, like a cheap woman! Then you will be on the right correct path.

Colonel 7.62 wrote:I agree Comrade O'Brien. The prole Chedoh does not deserve a certificate after asking for one. Although, I believe he may be entitled to one for "most thoughtcrimes in a day and still alive".

Excellent idea Comrade Colonel!!

Who is in charge of crafting Awards of the People so that they may craft such an award to be bestowed upon citizen Chedoh.

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

We should wait!

The next thing you know, he will be asking for the key to his leg chains!

Er..

Comrade Chedoh...

I might know where the keys are in exchange for a bit of Wealth Redistribution.

PM me for a number of an account in Bern

Obamugabe.

Obamugabe wrote:Er..

Comrade Chedoh...

I might know where the keys are in exchange for a bit of Wealth Redistribution.

PM me for a number of an account in Bern

Obamugabe.

hmmmmmm.

This is a test!

I will not be part of that capitalist greed and trade! I'm proud of the People's Chains © that constrict me and make my life miserable!

Chedoh... Chedoh...

This has nothing to do with Capitalism.

There is something I have been meaning to tell you a long time, Chedo.

I...

I am your father Chedoh!

Join me - and together we will rule the universe!

Now. About that Swiss account number...

Obamugabe wrote:Chedoh... Chedoh...

This has nothing to do with Capitalism.

There is something I have been meaning to tell you a long time, Chedo.

I...

I am your father Chedoh!

Join me - and together we will rule the universe!

Now. About that Swiss account number...

I was told that I shared the same father as Dear Leader. Well then there are probably thousands who can say that... Maybe you're right.

But I digress, I will have to report you to a Commissar. Hold on tight, I'll be right back!

Good news! I've been released today! Now I can truly serve the people and fight the rich!

Thank you Comrade O'Brien, for sending me to the Korrection Kamp ™ , I now know nothing but what I am told to know!

Color Chedoh with Che Beret © has now been reinstated!

Who released you? And when? And why was I not informed? And what are these papers on my desk regarding the new redistribution of your time? And where is your certificate of Rehabilitation? Do we have a Certificate of Rehabilitation? Or vodka? Why is the vodka gone? I demand answers!

Colonel 7.62 wrote:Who released you? And when? And why was I not informed? And what are these papers on my desk regarding the new redistribution of your time? And where is your certificate of Rehabilitation? Do we have a Certificate of Rehabilitation? Or vodka? Why is the vodka gone? I demand answers!

Some SEIU fellas (and pinkie) came by and corrected me for not being as progressive as I thought I was. I will learn eventually. I still await my certificate, hope I get it soon. Sorry I have failed you again comrade...

No, no, no. You haven't failed me. Rather my messengers have failed me. *loads TT-33* Excuse me while I go find those who are supposed to keep me up to date.

You will find your time is now redistributed to Prole Standard Time, as opposed to Gulag Savings Time. The SEIU goons will direct you to your new mandatory job. Good luck Comrade.

Colonel 7.62 wrote:No, no, no. You haven't failed me. Rather my messengers have failed me. *loads TT-33* Excuse me while I go find those who are supposed to keep me up to date.

You will find your time is now redistributed to Prole Standard Time, as opposed to Gulag Savings Time. The SEIU goons will direct you to your new mandatory job. Good luck Comrade.

I will put my Beret back on then, and thank those kind SEIU members for bum rushing me and kicking me while I was downshowing me the errors of my way.

I hope this proves my loyalty, I did not see this evidence at the trial!

Of course not. That's why it's called suppressed evidence. Silly Prole...