Comrades! Newsweek has a cover out to honor the Obamessiah and his plans for the USSA:


However, this is a lie! First of all, the Republicans and their supporters have not yet been Purged. Second, there are two separate but equal (according to People's Math) groups under Communism. There are the Unwashed Masses and then there is the Party. Not everyone is in the Party. Indeed, most are in the Unwashed Masses. So no, we are not "all socialists mow".


This is one of the most disturbing magazine covers I've ever seen. I really wish it was a fake, but it isn't. This nation is about to turn into a Communist hellhole very soon at the rate we're going.

And am I to understand that The Blackberry President will be quitting the thug life? He'll have to DX the Cadillac then...

-OV

{microphone off}
Maybe, but I think Newsweak (sic) is merely recognizing who their core audience is. They know that conservatives have pretty much deserted their crapazine and are not likely to come back, so their strategy is to please their remaining (mostly left of center and urban) readership.

Another perspective: in the financial markets, mainstream pubs like Time, Newsweak, Business Weak, etc, are considered "contrarian indicators". When a trend makes their covers, it means the trend is close to peaking or troughing. So, for example, when Time announces on its cover "real estate is hot" that is the time to consider selling real estate. When Business Weak announces "stocks are dead", that's the time to buy stocks. The timing is not exact, but it's usually a pretty reliable indicator. I don't know if the same predictions can be made for politics, but if you consider that economics often drives politics, there's possibly a case to be made for it.

It is but a sign of the glorious revolution, Comrades! Rejoice!

It used to be, we would shy away from such blatant terms as "socialist," seeing that the masses were not quite yet ready to embrace the True Face of the Revolution. Instead, we used euphemisms, like "liberal," which the self-proclaimed sophisticates would find more appealing.

Now that we see they are comfortable with it, we can start implementing still more blatant truths...like the Collective Farm...Re-Education...Domestic Security (so safe, the masses won't need Boomsticks anymore!)...and we can finally rewrite that pesky Constitution with match and lighter fluid.

But what I find particularly amusing, especially among the younger, more gullible minds (like the kind you see in Indoctrinate U), is that the peasants, even the proletariat, have no concept of who is "more equal." They all envision themselves to be part of the Politburo, those that dictate Public Policy, who decide who gets what in the Redistribution. Maybe they fancy themselves a Commissar, using the People's Morale Enforcer^tm and a cold stare to send the peasants cowering.

The Fools!
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Only a select few are equal enough to be part of the Inner Circle, the Architects and Masterminds of the Revolution. Only they are worthy of the...perks...of such a high degree of servanthood. Such as high-quality healthcare, a swanky dacha, freedom of thought, the best food, the latest model Zil, and to personally experience how much an aphrodisiac power is as you enjoy the favors of the more desirable female proles (well, Theo may disagree there).

The rest are equal...much in the same way a pork farmer sees all his piggies as equal. Or the way feudal lords saw their peasants as equal.

Four legs good...two legs better!



That magazine pissed me off for the last time when Saddam was captured and it only gave the story half a page's worth of coverage (despite featuring it as a cover-page story). I canceled my subscription after that...and I grew up with the magazine. The bias was so jaevla blatant!

When I saw that picture of a Nooseweek cover several days ago, I thought it was some agitprop parody. But, you know, I thought 9/11 was a hoax the morning it happened, too, until I saw the buildings fall.

DDR Kamerad,

Like a child at Halloween, I too fancy myself a Commissar, though at heart I know I am not. The final laugh will be at those who really are because it's only a matter of time until they outlive their usefulness, are suspected of some kind of crime against the Dear Leader, the Dear Leader develops paranoia, or any number of other factors that cause the more equal members to be put through the People's Meatgrinder.

-OV

Newsweek is just doing the People's job, reassurance of The Party's power
(off)
We entered a socialist state the moment we started bailing out businesses.

[off] I thought the first New Deal and the establishment of labor unions was a pretty good first step. [/off]

(off)
It was a good start, but it sure wasn't the move.

Glorious Comrade Commissar,

At least we no longer need hide the existence of the party, or use Doublespeak to disguise our agenda. Soon The One should just come out and say, "Pass the spendulus because I say so because it's for The Common Good. Dissenters will be purged." No longer must we dickdance and disguise the glorious word "Socialism" with "Change." I disrobe in celebration and pour vodka down my asscrack.

-OV

(orff)

Don't forget the whole attempt to sweep McCarthy under the rug about a decade later. Anyone read Coulter's book "Treason?" Probably her best work out of all of them.

Obamissar, when you are finished pouring vodka down your asscrack, may I have the empty bottle? I wish to make a celebratory cocktail of the Molotov variety to use in taking down needless capitalist institutions.

{out of karakter} So disturbed. So very, very disturbed.

Comrade7.62-

But of course! A little redistribution and recycling is just what we need to kick off this whole shebang! I'm envisioning what the downtrodden did to WaMu branches, only on a grander scale. Now, WaMu is indeed popular in the PPC of Obama, so did you witness any such defacement?

I fear that in Seattle, where nary a day goes by without tear gas canisters being slung in the spirit of hate and oppression, that your Molotov will merely vanish into a sea of similar Messages of Hope^TM Unless of course, you start with capitalist brothels like Starbucks. Now THAT will turn some heads!

Yours in CHope,

OV

Obamissar Vodkavich wrote:Glorious Comrade Commissar,

At least we no longer need hide the existence of the party, or use Doublespeak to disguise our agenda. Soon The One should just come out and say, "Pass the spendulus because I say so because it's for The Common Good. Dissenters will be purged." No longer must we dickdance and disguise the glorious word "Socialism" with "Change." I disrobe in celebration and pour vodka down my asscrack.

-OV

That's the point! Also, I'm now getting some disturbing images. . .

I'm like Bacchus but with a more Soviet flair...