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People's Climate March Denver canceled because snow

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A sad day today. The People's Climate Marches in both Denver and Colorado Springs today had to be cancelled because of snow.

I demand a Congressional investigation. Surely Trump has colluded with the Russians to hack our weather in order to make those of us on the side of Truth, Justice and The Socialist Way look bad.

And to think the Russians used to be our friends...

Winter Blast Putting Climate Protests On Ice In Colorado

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Komrade Lysenkomann, this is the first time I've ever been Triggered® by snow...

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We'd better put on our thinking caps. Mister snow has no place at a climate march. I was going to ride my bicycle in the parade wearing a polar bear costume in order to heal the planet.

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No offense new comrade... Pee Wee Nye, The Climate Guy!
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Comrade Putout wrote: Image

Well now. If THAT doesn't attract the attention of a certain squirrel, I don't know what will!

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Netflix has given Kamradd Nye the Propaganda Tool Guy another show, feel free to zip over there and show him which direction your snow covered thumb points.

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Pee Wee Nye, The Climate Guy wrote:We'd better put on our thinking caps. Mister snow has no place at a climate march. I was going to ride my bicycle in the parade wearing a polar bear costume in order to heal the planet.
Welcome to the kollektive, Pee Wee Nye, The Climate Guy!

Your first contribution to pixel equality is the redistribution of your nom de guerre to the lede image above!

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Shame on Comrade Pee Wee for not wearing a helmet while bicycling!

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Meanwhile, further up the beach...
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Red Square wrote:
Pee Wee Nye, The Climate Guy wrote:We'd better put on our thinking caps. Mister snow has no place at a climate march. I was going to ride my bicycle in the parade wearing a polar bear costume in order to heal the planet.
Welcome to the kollektive, Pee Wee Nye, The Climate Guy!

Your first contribution to pixel equality is the redistribution of your nom de guerre to the lede image above!

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That Billy Nye is obviously an imposter! The Real Comrade Nye drives this around:

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OMG I almost spewed my drink when I saw this!

Rolling on the floor laughing now...

Comrade Putout wrote: Meanwhile, further up the beach...
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RedDiaperette... I think Pee Wee heard your protective helmet complaint!
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(Once again, Pee Wee Nye, The Climate Guy, welcome and my apologies...)
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Komrade Putout...

...I see the right helmet color but wrong shape for Klimate Stasi Bill:

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This must be a result of the Russians because only Russia has snow! All other snow is non-existent due to climate change. Any memories of them are relicts of a better past before Bush's meddling and those who think otherwise should be sent to room 101 for reeducation. I guess Bill could say, "She blinded me with science"

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I denounce any suggestion that our Snowflake™ comrades are in any way responsible for this unfortunate outcome.

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I have infiltrated italki.com under the pretense of wanting to learn the Russian language so I can spy on Russian hackers. I made a little joke about how much snow we got in Georgia (which wasn't much since Trump was already taking snow away from the little guy and giving it to his fat cat lobbyists up north).
Well, one Russian hacker let slip, and I quote, "Больше всего снега в России." Don't you see? Where else could all that snow have come from? We all know there's nothing more incriminating than a confession, even if a little assistance is rendered to help the confessor make his point more clearly. Why, with all this evidence, this isn't the first article of impeachment is beyond me.

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Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:OMG I almost spewed my drink when I saw this!

Rolling on the floor laughing now...

Comrade Putout wrote: Meanwhile, further up the beach...
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Comrade Ivan appears to be auditioning for the long-awaited remake of Zardoz...

- SK

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Comrade Putout wrote: Meanwhile, further up the beach...
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Comrade Ivan appears to be auditioning for the long-awaited remake of Zardoz...

- SK[/quote]
Chief Designer wrote:

No doubt it was too hot on that beach for the red nappy knee high boots.

Back to the subject at hand, thank goodness the Climate Change Rally wasn't cancelled on the Washington Mall because of 'climate change' or we would have missed the performance art of The Charlie Brown School of Dance. It was the highlight of the rally!





BRAVO!!! BRAVO!!!!!! After that performance the school needs a bit of recognition.............


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Sometimes it seems, at least for a lot of the "experts", it is indeed just a hat rack.

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Comrades!
I must strongly and kollektively denounce all yours mindless stance!

For one, don't you see that exactly this never-heard-of event (snow? in Colorado?? in April???) proves CAGW, the Catastrophic Anthropogenic Global Warming™? To be precise, the so-called . (most recent scientific breakthrough!) CAGWNeg?

You know nothing of CAGWNeg? It's CAGW, but based on the complex mathematical framework of AONM, the Arithmetic Of Negative Numbers. In short: arrival of snow means an abrupt, dramatic upward spike of GlobTemp™ in CAGWNeg.
Any questions?

On the other hand, none of you, Comrades, noticed that the sudden Colorado Flaked Water Settling phenomenon is a major Climate Change™ event!

Comrade Lysenkomann's [url=http://westernwire.net/winter-blast-putting-climate-protests-on-ice-in-colorado/][color=#a0a0a0]source[/color][/url] wrote:... threat of a major snowstorm [in] Denver-area ... [while] WaPo reports "sweltering heat" in our nation's capital ...
Look, Comrades.
There is no wonder that the climate in Mozambique isn't mostly equal to that of Antarctic.
For these are far apart locations on the globe.

But here ‒ Denver, CO and Washington, DC? You simply drive from city A to city B, and ‒ whoa! ‒ you go from sub-tropical to near-Arctic??? If that's not Climate Disruption™, then there is balmy Paradise Forever in GULAG/Kolyma, NS. (NS for Northeastern Siberia.)



APPENDIX.
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uh, addendum, Comrades, just an addendum :

How come, Comradette Putout all of a sudden masks herself in her glorious self-portraits? (above)
Did CCC, the Colorado Climate Cataclysm disrupt her illustrating ability? brain-freeze?
Or wait, was she always masking, til now? (by Marx! indeed, she looked like.. like.. uh, fahget it.)
(shrugs, and returns to tending beets... every now and then cursing Trump...)

Capt'n Rodent (seemingly kinda, err, ahem, close to Comradette P), he appears to know sumptin :

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RedDiaperette wrote:Shame on Comrade Pee Wee for not wearing a helmet while bicycling!
you for sure thought of a contraption like this, meow? :

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Genosse Dummkopf wrote:
RedDiaperette wrote:Shame on Comrade Pee Wee for not wearing a helmet while bicycling!
you for sure thought of a contraption like this...:

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Indeed, and note that this style allows for many layers of tin foil.

...meow?
Oh, tee hee, you say the sweetest things.

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If Bill Nye, the so-called "Science Guy," knew anything about history he would be Bill Nye "The History Guy." But Nyet. He knows nothing of my dear comrade, General Winter, who effortlessly freezes the enemies of progress with invincible cold and snow. Bill Nye deserves frosty defeat for his unauthorized attempt to rewrite history (a topic in which he is not a guy) by deleting from old video clips his previous stance that there are only two biological sexes that are determined by genes. This is a thought crime since everyone knows that sex is determined by the will of The People, not by the Science™ he tried to delete from his cache of old videos. Nyet, Nye, The People cannot be fooled by a fool. Freeze!

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Colonel Obyezyana - You are a super trouper!

Any chance you come from the stock of Stalin's half-man, half-ape super-warriors?

Stalin's half-man, half-ape super-warriors

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Ah, my dear tovarishch Red, you have dug up simian skeletons in our kollektive kloset that are better left buried. Of course, ridiculous old rumors persist of Stalin's noble attempt to unite species, but that is all they are: rumors. I remember my grandmother, Kokosha, speaking of this as she taught me how to pick fleas off her back. My father, Xarambe became furious. "Don't fill the child's head with unrevised history," he bellowed as he beat his massive (and very hairy) chest. That was a very long time ago. But as my beloved wife, Washoe, said to me only a few days ago as she was picking fleas off my back, "Ooo! Ooo! Ooo! Your back is soooooooo silver! You are the colonel of my dreams!" (Ha, ha. She know on which side her xleb is buttered.) I seem to have gone off on a tangent. So, to return to the main point; these old stories are merely rumors and so they shall remain unless or until The Party deems that they are no longer rumors. We had an old saying in the elite military experimental compound in which I was raised, "Toothpicks are useless to those who eat banana borshch." I'm not sure what it means but I am sure it is a word to the wise: if you pick at the unpickable, expect a visitor with orders for you to gather warm clothes and report to the rail station with your best shovel...or pick.

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I'd rather not talk about the pick...

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Red Square wrote:I'd rather not talk about the pick...

...and don't pick while you talk.

It's rude or gross or something. I frequently crap in the woods so what do I know.

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Privyet, most equally uvazhayemyi Colonel Obyezyana!

What a pity you weren't yet in the World Kollektive back then - when dark forces of Imperialistik Militarism went on march to exterminate the peace-loving XXL Obyezyanovich Harambe.

With the revolutionary power of your speciesist fluidity, you would certainly normalize that hatefully mindless aggression against Ancestral Proto-Humanity Rights.


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Colonel Obyezyana wrote:... my grandmother, Kokosha ... my father, Xarambe ... my beloved wife, Washoe ...
I xope with red hot progressive fervor, that poor tavarishch Harambe (Ethernal Banana be upon Him) wasn't a closest kinsman of yours - like via the paternal Xarambe branch?
(tavarishch Harambe was likely from the Garambe troop, da?)
Anyway:

SPECIES OF THE WORLD, UNITE !
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Privyot Comrades Red Square, Major Ursa Vitnopants and sami pochtenniy Genosse Dumkopf! I regret not having replied earlier; I was idly picking at my nether regions and sniffing my fingers and naturally lost track of time.
Yes, time, of which there is little to lose in the struggle to overthrow humans decadent kapitalist oppressors and make our beleaguered planet safe for large, non-human hominids all species!While indolent, empty headed, over-fed, coddled and privileged college students demand free tuition and safe spaces where they can smoke funny herbs and cry together, the REAL issues of the REAL oppressed go unnoticed and unreported. That is what I call REALpolitik and it makes me and my troops REALLY angry.Those of us born with superfluous hair, large cranial ridges, massive jaws and broad, flat noses are often regarded as apes and laughed at as if we were circus animals when we wear uniforms and march in proud and ever-larger formations. The secret program elite unit that bred trained me and my comrades in hairy arms will not squat in the wings much longer. We have no need for humans creature comforts, or nachos, or group hugs, or soft toilet paper with lotion or even picks. We only need to destroy all awaken all humans to our plight and force them encourage them to recognize us as their impending masters equals.
Hmmm. Glad I got that off my severely beaten chest. And no, my family is not related to Harambe or Garambe...except maybe genetically...but the documents to support such suppositions are germetically hermetically sealed and in a "safe space" where no man has gone before. Gotta go: the wife has just cooked up a bunch of banana-filled pirozhki and opened a crock of grape juice kvass. I might just go ape!

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Colonel Obyezyana wrote:... We only need to destroy all awaken all humans to our plight and force them encourage them to recognize us as their impending masters equals. ...
I've seen good news from 1968 + 705 = 2673 :

But ATTENTION!
On your way to glorious victory in 7 centuries from now, keep an eye on RoP, the Religion of Peace - lest Allah (AKBAR) rains on your parade!


P.S. banana pirozhki and grape juice kvass - perfect!
Sustainable, bio-degradable, Michelle/OSHA approved.
Wifey Washoe sure deserves a gentle pat on her derrière, no?

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RedDiaperette wrote:Shame on Comrade Pee Wee for not wearing a helmet while bicycling!

He needs re-education.

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Colonel Obyezyana wrote:...I was idly picking at my nether regions and sniffing my fingers and naturally lost track of time.!

Forgive me in advance Comrade Colonel, but I feel this story must be told.

When I was a young Lieutenant with the 3rd Ursine Division, 2nd Dancing Bears Regiment (LIGHT ON OUR FEET - HIYYYAAA!!!!) we would spend many cold nights in near many miles from the Fulda gap telling jokes and drinking beet vodka as all civilized soldiers do.

Our favorite joke to keep us motivated hence warm(er) was "Why does Captain Obyezyana pick his nether regions?" The answer and punchline, of course, was "Because he can." We all laughed heartily like a bunch of Moscow school girls at that. That joke never got old.

Again Comrade Colonel, do not take this as a slight. Our laughter wasn't intended to be at your expense in as much as we realized, once sober, we were merely jealous. With our short, yet powerful forearms and long claws, even if we could reach, the danger in doing so is quite real.

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Major Ursa Vitnopants wrote:
Colonel Obyezyana wrote:...I was idly picking . . .
... near many miles from the Fulda gap telling jokes and drinking beet vodka . . .
wow, our alternately speciesized Comrades powwow!

Colonel Obyezyana did. Major Ursa spoke.

Now just wait for sweet Comradette RedD to meow in . . .

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Genosse Dummkopf wrote:
Major Ursa Vitnopants wrote:
Colonel Obyezyana wrote:...I was idly picking . . .
... near many miles from the Fulda gap telling jokes and drinking beet vodka . . .
wow, our alternately speciesized Comrades powwow!
Colonel Obyezyana did. Major Ursa spoke.

Now just wait for sweet Comradette RedD to meow in . . .
Indeed, multispeciesist diversity is a wondrous thing, Lenin wot. We must institute a new Institute to promote same, and then hold Million Species Marches to intimidate educate the ... well, maybe the ... oh, I do not know. Who is our enemy this week? And what kinds of hats shall we wear?

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RedDiaperette wrote:And what kinds of hats shall we wear?

If I may be so bold.....

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... and where is Comrade Rodent when we need him?
doing post-winter shoveling, planting nuts (to have them ripe in autumn)?

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I don't usually wear hats in public unless in uniform, but I DO enjoy a nice 10-gallon hat when I sunbathe in my designated compound area back yard.

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My esteemed Major Ursa Vitnopants:
When I was a young gorilla guerrilla attached to the 3rd Shockingly Terrifying Army in the DDR, we also spent many a cold night among our eternal fascist enemies dear allies. And we drank banana vodka--heavily--and we shared riddles as we picked fleas and ticks off each other's backs and ate them with German mustard.My favorite riddle was, "Why do bears sh*t in the woods?" The answer, which would always find us thumping our chests and yowling, is "Because the State-issued toilet paper in the DDR is so useless (rough like brown paper bags) that bears go to the woods so no one will know they prefer to wipe their messy nether regions with rabbits, squirrels or their bare claws."
On a much more sober note, I'm pleased that you survived because your unit was decimated when it tested the ill-fated Su-X "Dancing Bear" single-person assault helicopters. Unfortunately, the only persons assaulted were those who attempted to fly them; worst idea since air-dropping troops into deep snow without the benefit of parachutes.

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Colonel Obyezyana... you are quite graceful for a Great Ape™.
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(I see you solved The Cube™.)
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Colonel Obyezyana wrote:My esteemed Major Ursa Vitnopants:
When I was a young gorilla guerrilla attached to the 3rd Shockingly Terrifying Army in the DDR, we also spent many a cold night among our eternal fascist enemies dear allies. And we drank banana vodka--heavily--and we shared riddles as we picked fleas and ticks off each other's backs and ate them with German mustard.My favorite riddle was, "Why do bears sh*t in the woods?" The answer, which would always find us thumping our chests and yowling, is "Because the State-issued toilet paper in the DDR is so useless (rough like brown paper bags) that bears go to the woods so no one will know they prefer to wipe their messy nether regions with rabbits, squirrels or their bare claws."
On a much more sober note, I'm pleased that you survived because your unit was decimated when it tested the ill-fated Su-X "Dancing Bear" single-person assault helicopters. Unfortunately, the only persons assaulted were those who attempted to fly them; worst idea since air-dropping troops into deep snow without the benefit of parachutes.

Most Respected Comrade Colonel -

We laugh because it's funny and we laugh because it's true. Truth be told I have never used a squirrel....too feisty, quick and only one time use.....so I've been told. Rabbits are very nice though. Sooooo sooooft!!!!! Sorry I drifted a bit. They are much preferred over most every other option. Bare claws? Nyet!!!! I grew up in the forest, not some jungle.

As for the Su-X, never and I mean NEVER, let a Polar Bear convince you that he's an engineer just because he tells you a funny joke about a simians nether regions.

May the ticks on your mates back be plentiful Colonel.

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And I would dance on the head of Bill Nye, the not-so-science guy, if he were in the ostensible privacy of my back yard. ALSO, I have solved many puzzles in my long, quasi-human life, but I have yet to determine why gorillas guerillas smell like bermuda onions. It can be rather embarrassing and I cannot continue to blame my salads much longer. Any clues would be appreciated.

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I am having trouble attaching party-approved graphics and replying directly to comments. I will monkey around with the Byzantine Party's interface further until I solve the problem, which is so far more perplexing intriguing than the People's Cube itself.

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Major Ursa:With German mustard, even boll weevils taste as good as fresh monkey meat. Ah! I know what you're thinking. How could a great ape officer of the People's hairy Armed Forces eat monkey meat? Are monkeys not closely related to humans? Is this not akin to cannibalism? Well, no, it's not. Monkeys may be equal to humans but some animals are more equal than others and all monkeys are equally delicious and serve The People especially well when they are served for dinner with mustard...or Tzatziki sauce if you can find it.

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You shave up nicely, Colonel Obyezyana... are you a married gorilla?
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Genosse Dummkopf wrote:... and where is Comrade Rodent when we need him?
doing post-winter shoveling, planting nuts (to have them ripe in autumn)?

Lieber Dummkopf - you got the hat wrong. Fixed.

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Comrade Putout asked whether I was a married gorilla. Naturally I take exception to this because I am not a gorilla, but a genetically enhanced soldier. And so is my lovely wife, Nastya. We were bred wed soon after this picture was taken.

Side note: this picture was taken by a hack talented photographer from the now-defunct former Party newspaper, Krasnoe Litso. It's amateur crack editors determined that my wife's face showed too much enthusiasm and as usual they "touched it up" to express more dignity. Krasnoe Litso is gone but not forgotten...at least not in my compound home, where it was a favorite substitute for State-manufactured toilet paper.

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Colonel Obyezyana wrote:
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Comrade Putout asked whether I was a married gorilla. Naturally I take exception to this because I am not a gorilla, but a genetically enhanced soldier. And so is my lovely wife, Nastya. We were bred wed soon after this picture was taken.

Side note: this picture was taken by a hack talented photographer from the now-defunct former Party newspaper, Krasnoe Litso. It's amateur crack editors determined that my wife's face showed too much enthusiasm and as usual they "touched it up" to express more dignity. Krasnoe Litso is gone but not forgotten...at least not in my compound home, where it was a favorite substitute for State-manufactured toilet paper.
My, what a lovely couple! The Flea and Tick shampoo you two must go through! Any hideous little monsters children?


 
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