In a shockingly refreshing discovery made today by the Heritage Foundation, Dear Leader, President B. Hussein Obama, has been regularly improving history by inserting his achievements as The One into the biographies of previous - and obviously inferior - presidents.

Presidential Spokesmouth Jay "Carney" Carney stated that, "While there's little that can be done in some of the worst cases cases, President Obama has greatly improved history in most of the biographies of presidents who came before Him."

Former president George Washington was praying for what's left of the United States and was unavailable for comment.

Glorious! President Obama can obviously improve anything by his mere presence, even the sorry biographies of the racist white heterosexual males who once ran this mean country. Praise be Dear Leader and his composite girlfriend(s).

Yes - and let's not forget His good friend that guy from the neighborhood, Bill Ayers, who may or may not have had a helping hand in history's improvement! If anyone could spice up those dreary tales of old, dead, white people with snippets from the legendary Life of Dear Leader it'd be Bill (unless, of course, he was busy planning to blow them up and such back then).

Comrades, I must ask....why start with Calvin Coolidge? There are naturally improvements Dear Leader could make to all racist old white men who previously held this office. Certainly, Dear Leader could do much to improve Abraham Lincoln's time in office. And really, was it not Dear Leader who convinced Rutherford Hayes to install the telephone in the White House? Further, even though Woodrow Wilson was an excellent example from our party, Dear Leader could improve upon him as well.

As of yet, no one here has given him the richly deserved credit
he (PBUH) alone commands the economy for authoring the glorious Party™ ideology.

Shameful.




............................................................................CAPITALI$M