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President Obama invited to join the Chinese Communist Party

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Comrades,

Ever vigilant to the oppressed proletariat's messages that manage to break through the byzantine obstructionist media force field of the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy, I often read Channel News Asia. It is based in the capitalist nightmare of Singapore, which is the source of the crude malicious stereotypes about life in the Workers' Paradise of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Despite the terrifying fascist control of, well, everything in Singapore, its own media outlet has revealed that President Obama has been invited, on the progressive social networking site Google+, to join the Chinese Communist Party:
"We will give you a big red flower, which you can wear on your chest, and honourably give you a party certificate (completely free membership for the first year)," said the online user, named Duke Dai.
Comrades, this is a touching example of the inherently tolerant and inclusive nature of every true People's Party. While Comrade Obama still faces the wrath of regrettably large and persistent regressive America, there is no doubting His acceptance of this invitation. His benevolent renunciation of the Keystone XL pipeline to help build Socialism in One Country--China--is an example we must, and I do mean must, live by.

The offer to join the Party should be rescinded. Obama's factionalism is quite obviously demonstrated when he coddled up to the One World Capitalists so see if their richness would rub off on him in the Trotskyite Solyndra scandal. Working against the Chinese Motherland is pure deviationism that must be dealt with severely. This week, the Motherland announced another price drop in solar panels. That should fix the traitorious revisionist.

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What else is new? Obamao has been known to imitate Chairman Mao, which is the best form of flattery.

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Take his famous Floridian dip that was hailed in the media as much as Mao's Big Swim. But, comrades, let it be known that it's hacks who imitate; real artists STEAL!

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On the 40th anniversary of that great event (August 14, 2010), jubilant masses of Floridians, tourists, and Gov. Charlie Crist crowded the beaches to participate a great "Suspend-the-Disbelief" extravaganza celebrating their First President who discovered water. Obamao attended the event and personally swam to stress his wholehearted support for the importance of swimming, just like Mao before him in the Yellow River, which famously launched the Cultural Revolution of 1966.
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Comrades,

It is with great pleasure that I note the subtitle for the inspiring design below, brought forth with the greatest care and compassion, a characteristic of all State-owned and closed-shop corporate entities: RMB, Only RMB, Is the driving force of World history.

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Unlike that paper used by the running dog imperialists in the renegade backwater province of Taiwan, the true Chinese--nay, the people's!--currency is the renminbao, RMB. This succinct statement of Current Truth™ is proletarian genius: Marxism-Leninism has embraced the diversity of Maoism to achieve a true global People's Currency that, like the Truth guiding it, is on its unstoppable path toward the glorious World of Next Tuesday!Comrade #1 Obama has been working to bring the Yankee CEUs (capitalist exploitation units) to heel, out of deference to superior Thought and Practice. The oppressed masses in the USA are just a few more Helicopter Ben payloads away from becoming able to celebrate the acknowledgement of the Chinese currency as the People's Currency with involuntarily spontaneous CEU-confetti parades of welcome and relief from Capitalism.


 
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