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The People's Cube forms Hospitality Committee

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FROM: Comrade Red Square, People's Director

ATTN: All comrades of the People's Cube kollektive


GLORIOUS ANNOUNCEMENT


On April 1st of this year The People's Cube will be celebrating its glorious 10-year anniversary.

The People's Hospitality Committee is being formed. Candidacies and ideas for celebration are now being accepted on an equal-opportunity basis.

Note: Some candidacies, ideas, and opportunities are more equal than others.

Kollektively yours,
Comrade Red Square (aka Glorious Incarnadine Trapezoid)
People's Director
Dept of Visual Agitation and Unanimity

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Congratulations, and long-live The Cube! Or for our comrades from south of the border: ¡Viva la Cube! Perhaps we can stage a fiesta with a Cube-shaped pinata filled with beets and ration cards involuntarily donated by members of the kollektive.

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Will we have the dunk tank for such occasion?
Who will be the Commissioner of Concessions this year?
What Communist Party sustenance is needed?

Red Square wrote:Note: Some candidacies, ideas, and opportunities are more equal than others.

Well, that's all right then, as long as they're all equal.

I volunteer to run the "Pin the Tail Blame on Climate Change Deniers Using the 120 PSI Nail Gun" stall.

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Hammer and Loupe wrote:Will we have the dunk tank for such occasion?
Who will be the Commissioner of Concessions this year?
What Communist Party sustenance is needed?
The economy being what it is, perhaps it would be best to go B.Y.O.B. (Bring Your Own Beets). If the dunk-tank is filled with the People's Vodka, I'd volunteer for the job of dunkee. I also think The People's Children would reap much enjoyment from learning the old tradition of 'bobbing for beets'.

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I suggest a give-away! The People™ always like to get free stuff.

I suggest we start by making everybody give-away their rights to free speech, arms, due process and privacy.

We should give-away citizenship to anybody who wants it.

We should give-away all federal lands to undocumented workers and the decendents of slaves. (I'm a decendent of slaves - the Romans enslaved my ancestors - but this isn't about me).

We should give-away sovereignty to the United Nations.

We should give-away until it hurts and then give-away a little more.

For The Children™.

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I note that it is a HISPITALITY Committee.
A tribute to "our Lord and Savior, Barack Obama" no doubt.

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Konservative_Punk wrote:
Hammer and Loupe wrote:Will we have the dunk tank for such occasion?
Who will be the Commissioner of Concessions this year?
What Communist Party sustenance is needed?
The economy being what it is, perhaps it would be best to go B.Y.O.B. (Bring Your Own Beets). If the dunk-tank is filled with the People's Vodka, I'd volunteer for the job of dunkee. I also think The People's Children would reap much enjoyment from learning the old tradition of 'bobbing for beets'.
Well, since water is so precious, we need to use vodka for anything that needs water.

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Soviet Mike Komsomolets wrote:I note that it is a HISPITALITY Committee.
A tribute to "our Lord and Savior, Barack Obama" no doubt.
Or perhaps to all our comrades among the Hispanic Americans-in-Waiting.

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RedDiaperette wrote:
Soviet Mike Komsomolets wrote:I note that it is a HISPITALITY Committee.
A tribute to "our Lord and Savior, Barack Obama" no doubt.
Or perhaps to all our comrades among the Hispanic Americans-in-Waiting.
In fact, this typo (now korrekted) was a tribute to the lack of revolutionary zeal and diligence on the part of our Senior Assistant Editor, Mrs. Red Square, whose job it is to proofread all typos before they are released to the toiling masses at large. Mrs. Red Square has now been suspended until further notice. She has also become ineligible for the position of the Chairperson of the Hospitality Committee, although she is still allowed to work on the Hospitality Committee as a junior member. You can't cook an omelet without breaking the cook's fingers around here!

P.S. Take this as an explanation of any further typos for the duration of her suspension.

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Thank you for 10 great years! The Peoples Cube has been the first site I bookmark after every hard drive failure during both of your quota breaking 5 year plans. Truly the vanguard of the gloriously advancing satirical masses. Thanks again.


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Despite a disciplined liberal education at a prestigious university, Mrs. Red Square perhaps needs to be taught another "lesson".

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Soviet Mike Komsomolets - that picture of a bruised gluteus maximus signed as "Norman Rockwell" got me thinking that the prog movement had finally uncovered evidence which could destroy that paint-brush-wielding apologist of Amerikkkan imperialism by declaring Rockwell a sadistic, misogynistic, male chauvinist pervert. So I did some research - and imagine my disappointment when the picture turned out to be only a September 1975 cover of National Lampoon magazine.

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Ha! Ha! "Disciplined liberal education!" I shall add that to other treasured phrases such as "government shutdown."

I believe that is actually one of the lesser-known Rockwell paintings, "Turn Your Head and Cough."

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Many years ago our own Ivan the Stakhanovets (at that time known as Tovarichi the Tautologist) taught prose fiction at the kollektive junior kollege. Here he disciplines a naughty coed by marking her with the scarlet cube.

(Relax... it's only red ink!)

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tovarichi-the-tautologist.jpg

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Comrade Putout wrote:.
Many years ago our own Ivan the Stakhanovets (at that time known as Tovarichi the Tautologist) taught prose fiction at the kollektive junior kollege. Here he disciplines a naughty coed by marking her with the scarlet cube.

(Relax... it's only red ink!)

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NOTE: It's NOT his sister!

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Hillary asked me to pass these along because [color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek[/color] wrote:
NOTE: It's NOT his sister!
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the-peoples-mugger.jpg
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hillary-farts-in-your-general-direction.jpg

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Comrade Putout wrote:
Hillary asked me to pass these along because [color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek[/color] wrote:
NOTE: It's NOT his sister!
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The attachment the-peoples-mugger.jpg is no longer available
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The attachment hillary-farts-in-your-general-direction.jpg is no longer available
I know that, silly person! That's what I get for trying to keep you out of trouble! This is you!

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[color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek[/color] laughingly wrote:...trying to keep you out of trouble!
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I think we should blame this off topic diversion on the young Russian!
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Comrade Putout wrote: .
teamwork.jpg
Paddling a smiling Putout, GOOD
Having to hold a squirrel not so good....There is a balance in nature (except for that climate stuff)

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So good to see the number of non-human-persons on the Glorious Cube increasing. As Comrade Squirrel so insightfully pointed out in another thread, Humans often have trouble thinking out of the box, but Animals never have trouble thinking inside of the Cube.. or something to that effect.

As Comrade Kangaroo has suggested, I like the idea of relieving people of their arms. Might I suggest giving some of them to the non-human members of the Cube. My flippers can be a real pain in the flukes. I don't even need all of their arms... Just their hands would be awesome. I could use the arms on the necro-proxies as they are often the first appendage to be damaged. Also, taking peoples' guns would be good too.

Comrade Putout,
Put down Comrade Squirrel! No Means No! Unless you are in a fraternity at Duke.

Finally, Our Glorious Incarnadine Trapezoid... While I am all for korrekt language, what do you have against hos? Or for that matter, hoes?

Just Curious,
Sis

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In what, no doubt, will be an effort in vain to return this thread to its topic, I point out that the 10th Birthday of The Peoples Cube has been deemed such an imporant cultural milestone that there will be a movie about it. It will, at first blush, appear to be a sequal to "10" starring Mr. & Mrs. Red Square:

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Of course, those of us who are geezers remember the original "10" starred Bo Derek as "10" and Dudley Moore as her suitor.

But the Sequel cannot include Bo Derek due to rumors that she claims to be a "Republican," and it would, of course, be deemed subversive in the extreme for celebration of the 10th Birthday of the Worlds Perfect Icon of Collectivism to reprise an appearance by a Hollywood Turncoat who claims to have changed from a "Perfect 10" into a <spit> "Republican" of the "libertarian" variety. Fortunately for The Collective, the gorgeous Mrs. Red Square more than fills the bill.

There remains much work to be done by this Committee between today (March 30, 2015) and B-Day (April 1, 2015).

--KOOK


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W? T? F? I've been reading this propaganda for 10 effin years?!?!? Well, the Cube wasn't lying when they said "We put the U in Gulag" ...well, of course they lie, this is the PRAVDA of the interwebz. Keep moving "FORWARD" Comrades!



 
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