Comrades, I've just signed the papers for voluntary commitment to the Karl Marx Treatment Center...again.

I've been questioning authority. I've had doubts about the wisdom of Obama's policies. I've been running to the toilet frequently just to sit and think.

Comrades, I have a bad case of the Trotsky's and before I wind up cooling my heels in the gulag I need a dose of wind powered electroshock therapy. Last time I needed a course of treatment there were rolling brownouts in California.

But what am I to do? A Party elitist like me can't live like this, commonsense is just so...common. I fear for my Party approved sanity. Left untreated I worry that I'll become one of the "norms" like Sarah Palin or Dick Cheney (shudder).

Is there any hope for a cure?

There is always the hot lead enema to consider Comrade.

I'm not just a nurse - I'm also a carpenter! Ever since Obamacare began, my nurse's salary hasn't been enough to pay my bills, so I got a second job as a carpenter at the same clinic, making coffins. Luckily, my second job turned out so lucrative, I may just quit nursing.

Comrade,
You are exhibiting signs of a disease most feared by us progressive upper party echelons called "Cogito, ergo sum" commonly known as “I think therefore I am.” Sadly without immediate treatment the Party considers this psychiatric dementing illness a terminal condition to any member that's “infected.”

The recurrent nature of the symptoms suggests fairly advanced disease and so employing the Jiffy-Lobo^TM procedure will likely prove palliative and not curative. It seems your only chance for a true cure is the progressive Stem Cell Research legislature Obama is signing into law. If this law is not immediately implemented you may have to fall back on the individual state sanctioned practice of euthanasia……

The last time I saw a needle that big was after I spent the weekend at Pupovich's Pleasure Palace!! Ouch!!

Comrade Whoopie wrote:Is there any hope for a cure?

Let's see, Comrade Whoopie. First, start with a Jiffi-Lobo, then, make an appointment with Laika to have any necessary updates made via signals to your tinfoil hat, then, have Colonel 7.62 run you through some intense revolutionary red guard training. And then, at the end of the first week, drink five shots of vodka on Friday night, and six shots of vodka on Saturday night.

The following Monday, get yourself to the beet field and dig up some fresh beets. Take one beet for yourself, whack it with a shovel until it is a fine mush, take the mushy beet mixture, and let it ferment with a little vodka for another week. In the meantime repeat all steps above, except for on Friday night, had seven shots of vodka, and on Saturday night have eight shots.

On the following Monday, fast. On Tuesday, fast again. On Wednesday, fast again, and on Thursday, fast again. On Friday, take the fermented beet mixture and eat it to break your fast, then have nine shots of vodka. It will knock you out for the rest of the weekend and on Monday, you will wake up refreshed and prog, without any trace of feeling self reliant and independent.

Thanks Leninka. I like the part about the vodka, I'll try that. Otherwise, the only other alternative treatment is a mind expanding hollow point bullet to the head.

Comrade Whoopie wrote: I've been running to the toilet frequently just to sit and think.

Comrade Whoopie, this is not a bad thing. Where do you think all of the great ideas emanating from the People's Congress are born? Unfortunately, many of the best ones get flushed.

Comrade Whoopie wrote: Comrades, I've just signed the papers for voluntary commitment to the Karl Marx Treatment Center...again.

Is there any hope for a cure?

Yes!

What you need is:
More cowbell
A shovel
and lose the pot to pee in