Hmmm...

Maybe I, $.$. Halliburton, a dark-spirited reactionary neo-conservative with a shady pharmaceutical past, tarnished by a personal friendship with Rush Limbaugh himself, should switch political parties, abandon my For the Greater Bad column, and run for president as a democrat. I can see it now.

"My fellow Americans. Do you want to know what's ruining your standard of living? Do you want to know why everything seems more and more screwed up by the day? Climate change! It's the climate change!

And do you know who's responsible? Not you. And not even America. No. We produce the least carbon dioxide of anyone. It's the rest of the world. The rest of the world. The rest of the world is the cause of all your problems.

Climate change! Climate change!

We have to stop the rest of the world before they kill us all! Do you hear the planet calling? We need a climate crusade. We have to create a great climate crusade. We have to create a great climate crusade army. We need a good crusade and a great big climate crusade army. We have to invade and take over those other countries that are killing the planet. We have to stop them. We have to stop them before they kill us all! We need to invade and take over those countries.

It's our duty.

The planet is calling.

Do you hear the call of duty? Do you hear the planet's call?

My fellow Americans, science dictates we launch a climate crusade and take over the world for it's own good. The poor ignorant people's of the world need us.

It is our great burden, but we undertake that great burden happily - with joy.

For the planet! For civilization! For humanity!"

I'll bet you a dollar I can convince progs to vote for that agenda and be enthusiastic imperialist crusaders.

P.S. Maybe I should also change my sig to something like this: "$.$. Halliburton is a noted humanitarian. He is considering a run for President on the Democrat Party ticket."

Your call for a climate crusade was painfully thought provoking. As I labored over my beet patch, pondering the call, I thought long about it. Something occurred to me that I had never previously considered... If Carbon Dioxide is our biggest enemy, then those who produce the most of it are to blame. Amerikans by and large do not exercise often, and therefore do not exhale profuse amounts of the deadly gas. Chinese and Indian citizens on the other hand, along with countless Kenyan marathon runners are very active, and would therefore produce heavier amounts. I thought you may have been onto something...
But then I remembered that their skin contains more melanin than my own. This imbalance in melanin levels means that they are allowed to emit more Carbon Dioxide than those of European descent. In light of this, I propose that we offer melanin credits alongside carbon credits in order to facilitate the offsetting our white privilege.

I'm not sure if I should denounce you for hate crimes, war crimes, espionage or treason, yet. Possibly all 4 with more guilty verdicts to follow.

It's not what is done but why it's done that matters and, clearly, your reasons for doing are purely inspired by the profit motive which, as we all know, is inspired by hate.

All hate is taxable at 100% and, as such, The Party™ will relieve you of whatever profit you make until you learn to be more kind and caring.

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:I'm not...

I'm not the problem. Climate deniers like you are the problem.

Yes comrades duty calls, but i'm a little hard of hearing right now. Besides, why not just get someone else to sacrifice all there time, effort and lives for the cause.

We can't be calling this a crusade. The Crusades were a struggle for control of the Holy Land. This is a struggle to control, i.e., lower, i.e., cool the earth's temperature and so should properly be called a Koolaid Coolade.

Dedhedvedev wrote:We can't be calling this a crusade. The Crusades were a struggle for control of the Holy Land. [highlight=#ffff00]This is a struggle to control, i.e., lower, i.e., cool the earth's temperature and so should properly be called a Koolaid Coolade[/highlight].

Excellent point Comrade Dedhedvedev... Cool-Aid could spawn the revival of bygone charity concerts in the spirit of Live-Aid, Farm-Aid, Band-Aid, etc.

Konservative_Punk wrote:

Dedhedvedev wrote:We can't be calling this a crusade. The Crusades were a struggle for control of the Holy Land. [highlight=#ffff00]This is a struggle to control, i.e., lower, i.e., cool the earth's temperature and so should properly be called a Koolaid Coolade[/highlight].

Excellent point Comrade Dedhedvedev... Cool-Aid could spawn the revival of bygone charity concerts in the spirit of Live-Aid, Farm-Aid, Band-Aid, etc.

And, from the Climate Change ATM, Cash-Aid for the political class.