Now that the polling has shown a 43% - 39% lead for the Obama campaign, the mainstream media declared the Democratic contender the winner in November's election for President of the United States.

With the election essentially over, Obama told the campaign staff that they've done a great job and they can now go home to their families to take some time off. "Put the campaign ads on full auto-pilot through November. It will keep our supporters amused and further infuriate the supporters of Bush's third term candidate.".

Afterwards, Obama granted an interview where he revealed a fondness of Courvoisier and Thin Mints. "Oh no....I don't believe it is presumptive to kick it back a notch. There's no way we're going to lose this thing. We've been told for so long that the media will correct any problems in perception...and they've largely exceeded our expectations. Can you pass over the arugula goat cheese spread? Thanks.".

John McCain, campaigning in Virginia, said that he would send Obama a 10-day Sedona Glen spa getaway package.

Critics, critics, critics.....I have already heard from a fellow Comrade that in this picture, Obama's hands are "white".

Why do people forget that the Obamessiah is only half-African-American?

GREAT WORK, ACORN! YOUR TIRELESS EFFORTS AND SUCCESS HAS BEEN FULFILLED! Voter registration of 105% in Indianapolis is a remarkable achievement!

No, this is an achievement:

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Citithens!!! (*panting*) Isth ffff-Thime To Goethe.... Back To School With Barack Obama