We must rid our People's children from the pressure of becoming a war-mongering, gun toting, school shooting, mall massacre, NFL wife killer. A progressive fellow traveler is offering a "Young Peacemaker" Merit Award to any child that relinquishes his/her/LGBT firearm and pledges to promote peace by writing a letter stating "Why I do not like to play with toy guns.".

The glorious certificate and information to obtain it can be found at https://notoyguns.org The phone number for further information is (310) 399-1000.

I am quite positive that each and every one of you will call this number to proudly proclaim your rejection of plastic firearms. Personally, I have already submitted my requests on behalf of the children Lee Harvey Oswald, Sirhan Sirhan, Mark David Chapman, and John J. Rambo.

And if halting senseless gun violence is not enough for you to be motivated to seek this award, if you read the fine print at the bottom of the certificate you will notice that it is also "PRINTED ON RECYCLED PAPER"

Your children can go green while rejecting mean. Please help out the cause by participating in this peaceful pledge.

Hand over my young peacemaker certificate

It's for the children, comrades.... *sniffle*

Please place your order for unarmed children today...

(child size re-education impaling stakes sold separately)

Stop the Insanity!

Soon there will be other progressive certificates.

1) Why I do not eat candy.
2) Why I love to eat vegetables.
3) Why I redistribute my allowance to poorer kids.
4) Why I will not have sex until I'm married.
5) Why I always obey my parents.

Why play with toy guns when the real ones are so much more fun? ... Do I still get my "Young Peacemaker" Merit Award?

Recollecting a progressive mother's mortification at her children's public display of martial spirit, I submit that there is a far more common threat to the ability of the People's Public Edukation system to embed passivity into the population progressive child's mentality:

Dedhedvedev wrote:Soon there will be other progressive certificates.
.

I like your idea of expanding such pledges.Why I won't buy 64oz soft drinks.Why I won't live in a right to work state.Why I won't buy my own contraception.Why I won't ever vote Republican.

Anyer Marx wrote:Why play with toy guns when the real ones are so much more fun? ... Do I still get my "Young Peacemaker" Merit Award?

Brilliant, Marx.

Comrades, even as our children must be taught that there is no Santa Clause other than President B. Hussein Obama, and that there is no "Christ"mas other than a Winter Celebration of Peace for All Beings, it's time that these childhood assault toys be eliminated from our innocent and progressive children's lives.

No one needs a Red Ryder BB Gun.

The definitive squirrel killer. I only use this for "hunting".

China amending its law on the elderly to require that adult children visit their aged parents is missing the boat entirely. Offering "Visiting Certificates" is the real answer to their problems.

China could make it 3 for 1: Visiting Certificate; No "toy" gun Peacemaker Award; and, the Overpopulation Reduction Badge.

ThePeoplesComrade wrote:

china old people.PNG

China amending its law on the elderly to require that adult children visit their aged parents is missing the boat entirely. Offering "Visiting Certificates" is the real answer to their problems.

ComradePeoples, would "Visiting Certificates" be available through Commissar Algore just like Carbon Credits?

Sugar Daddy Bear wrote:The definitive squirrel killer. I only use this for "hunting".

50cal2.jpg

Ok, I officially have "squirrel gun envy."

Red Menace wrote:

ThePeoplesComrade wrote:

The attachment china old people.PNG is no longer available

China amending its law on the elderly to require that adult children visit their aged parents is missing the boat entirely. Offering "Visiting Certificates" is the real answer to their problems.

ComradePeoples, would "Visiting Certificates" be available through Commissar Algore just like Carbon Credits?

Certainly and at a vastly reduced introductory price for the first three participants because "this is for the children and the planet". You can also get a free abortion with the purchase of one round trip to Europe in our Think Green Jumbo Jet.

Tovarichi wrote:

Sugar Daddy Bear wrote:The definitive squirrel killer. I only use this for "hunting".

50cal2.jpg

Ok, I officially have "squirrel gun envy."

Ah yes, the Barrett M-82 A1, reach out and touch a 'squirrel' at about 1.3 miles and pretty much vaporize his ass the poor thing in the process. God bless you Ronnie Barrett!