The teleprompter does my thinking, and I've gone off script
And Rhambo went back to Chicago, and Joe Biden has to take a leak
Jay Carney needs a new haircut, and the spotlight makes me karaoke
And Michelle threw out all of my cigarettes from off the balacony
The telepromter does my thinking
The teleprompter does my thinking, and put algae in your gas tank
The media's blind in one eye and he can't see out of the other
And the teleprompter writer got his pink slip and he still lives with his mother
And the teleprompter does my thinking
The teleprompter does my thinking
And my advisor's are all golf caddies that don't help my game
And Joe Biden is a mental midget with the IQ of a fence post
Cause the teleprompter does my thinking
The teleprompter does my thinking
And we can't find Iran with a Geiger counter
And Mooch hates me and my friends and you just can't get served without her
And Chrissy Matthews is drooling, and the country's on fire
And the newspapers were fooling, and journalism's retired
Cause the teleprompter does my thinking
The teleprompter does my thinking
The teleprompter does my thinking
not me
not me
not me
not me
not
me