Fight for Cultural Equality: UN Okays Cannibalism, Slavery

The Intergovernmental Cultural Climate Change Panel (ICCCP) declared its support for the recent UN announcement that all cultures are equally valid. Expanding on the resolution the group declared the rights of people are now culturally defined, rather than being based on any universal notion or concept. They suggest the term "human rights" is therefore both outmoded and racist as it would impose value for human life which some cultures don't accept. They recommended the term "multi-cultural peoples' rights" be used instead. "We take the announcement to mean our practices of torture, vendetta, and suppression of women and minorities dating back centuries have now been recognized as just different cultures different ways of doing things differently," said ICCCP spokesman Moussa Stache. "This measure will finally legitimize the long-sought revival of some of our members' traditional practices of cannibalism, slavery, head-hunting, and human sacrifice. Every society has rights to human rites."

~

After the announcement there was hand shaking and gift giving all around the chamber until it was pointed out this principle could be taken as validating Jewish culture as well. The members hurriedly reconvened, working around the clock for a work-around. The following day the panel declared Zionism a criminal conspiracy and not culture as recognized by the UN. As such, Judaism and Jews are to be reclassified as sub-UN. Explained Moussa Stache, "There are no inferior cultures, but there are inferior people."

 

The UN has long sanctioned important local cultural practices such as Genocide (A very important cultural celebration in Rwanda, Sudan and in my own People's Paradise of Zimbabwe) and Corruption (Also culturally very important in Zimbabwe, and practiced by eminent African dignitaries such as Kofi Annnan).

The fact that slavery and cannibalism are now accepted is truly and gloriously progressive.

This proves what I have always said: Comrade Idi Amin was a true progressive, misunderstood because he was so far ahead of his time.

Amandla!

Obamugabe
 

What!! It's 2100, and every last Jew hasn't yet been wiped off the face of the earth? And what about female circumcision, and the compulsory wearing Burkas and Veils. I hope it's a worldwide law. Otherwise, what good were all those suicide bombings of the past century. The infidel Amerikans, those Jews of the Western world, ought to have been annihilated, too. What is it about time! It seems the more things change, the more they revert back to the jungle. And, I suppose, this is good. After all, what greener existence is there than eating the recycled bodies of other comrades.
 

Don't worry, Leninka! The latest newsfeed from 2100 shows us this heroic UN peacekeeper on a pacifying mission in Texas, USA. He is apparently trying to communicate with UN headquarters in Havana via a newly confiscated iPod, but for whatever reason instead of directions all he can hear is "Sweet Home Alabama" or some such atrocity.


 

Remember when Bill Clinton died in 2029 and Hillary jumped on his funeral pyre next to the Ganges? It was a nice gesture since the Rupee bailed out the Amero during Chelsea Clinton's Administration in 2024. It's fine that some American women refuse to practice suttee and would rather emulate Michelle Obama and wear a burqa. It's always been about choice Comrades. Choice and Diversity.
It's still mystifying that Hillary just sat there laughing while the flames rose around her and not a single scale on her hide had a burn mark and she's still here in 2100.
Some called it a miracle, especially those who follow the great religious teachings of that famous 20th Century theologian, Anton LeVay, and whose numbers continue to grow around Washington D.C.
When Michelle Obama put on the burqa it was hailed as great progress but many still believe that when Hooters Restaurant made the burqa mandatory in the workplace, it just ripped the heart out of poor old Bill Clinton and that's what finally killed him. Bill just couldn't adapt to Change™ and that's sad for the boy who came from Hope.
 

All this talk of cannibalism is making me hungry. I have to go bite my fingernails.
Mmmm, cuticle.
 

Well, well, well, little Laika. Heh! heh! heh!

You better just watch yourself. I hear that Barry is going to invite The Dear Leader, Kim Jung Il to the white house for a state dinner - you might just get served up.,,,


Heh! heh! heh!

UN is finally catching on.

Now pass me some fava beans!


All the best, Laika,
"His Excellency President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Sea, and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular."
 

Red Square

Don't worry, Leninka! The latest newsfeed from 2100 shows us this heroic UN peacekeeper on a pacifying mission in Texas, USA. He is apparently trying to communicate with UN headquarters in Havana via a newly confiscated iPod, but for whatever reason instead of directions all he can hear is "Sweet Home Alabama" or some such atrocity.



Looks as if sunscreen has been outlawed, and the Janeane Garofalo look really took off! You just never know what's going to catch on.
 

His Excellency President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Sea, and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular

You better just watch yourself. I hear that Barry is going to invite The Dear Leader, Kim Jung Il to the white house for a state dinner - you might just get served up.,,,

I'd be delighted!
I always wanted to "Chirr wif Il".
Which is it? Volleyball or tennis? I'm accomplished at both and if Kim is as good at either of those as he is at golf, it will be great sport!
I must phone Madeline Albright and tell her the good news!
 

Red Square

Don't worry, Leninka! The latest newsfeed from 2100 shows us this heroic UN peacekeeper on a pacifying mission in Texas, USA. He is apparently trying to communicate with UN headquarters in Havana via a newly confiscated iPod, but for whatever reason instead of directions all he can hear is "Sweet Home Alabama" or some such atrocity.



Ahh, the progressive chickens are finally coming home to roost. Let us not forget that this photo was taken on the former ranch of the Bushitler; the property was turned into the “Van Jones Memorial Diversity Ranch” in 2090. Anyone in Texas or neighboring former states caught talking in “whitespeak,” or what used to be called proper English, is arrested and interned at the Diversity Ranch. If they are lucky, they are programmed for reinsertion into society. If they are unlucky, they become a meal for the UN troops.

Praise Obama, the future is glorious!!!
 

I wonder if they do some kind of ceremony to drive out the Condoleezza Rice and Bush devils that haunt the land.
 

Leninka

I wonder if they do some kind of ceremony to drive out the Condoleezza Rice and Bush devils that haunt the land.

Leninka, the ceremony of which you speak was performed repeatedly from 2090 to 2093. Normally a month is sufficient to extirpate the spirit of Rethuglikkkanism from liberated territory, but in this case three years were required, so deeply ingrained was the stain of racist patriarchal domination. Many diverse rituals were performed, but perhaps the most heartwarming was when the effigy of Sarah Palin, smeared with the blood of a recent whitespeaker sacrifice, was burned at the stake, atop a hillock of mutilated copies of books by fascist authors such as Hayek and Milton Friedman.

Even as late as 2095 it was considered risky to set foot on the Ranch, so resilient was the reactionary spirit that had dwelled in its bosom. Finally, in 2096, a formal dedication ceremony was performed by the secretary-general of the UN, Oprah Hussein Dodd-Huffington IV.
 

Yes, all cultures are now equal; except (as we in the inner party know) some cultures are more equal than others.

This Culture:

- http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=3022

- http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5911p ... et-ukraine

is more equal than this culture:

- http://www.ushistory.org/declaration/document/index.htm

- http://topics.law.cornell.edu/constitution
 

Red Square

[A]ll he can hear is "Sweet Home Alabama" or some such atrocity.



Comrades,

This musical abuse is possible, despite deserving a UN ban as a transgression against human rights and the song's inclusion in the Guantanamo aural torture list.

I think it more likely this ethnic world citizen is enjoying politically proper multicultural content: Radio Pyongyang: Commie Funk and Agit Pop from the Hermit Kingdom. I know I do, as do all good comrades I know.
 

Comrades,

The foggy recesses of my pre-prog mind seem to recall Douglas Fairbanks noting that the Ubangi female with her disc-extended lips provided a very noteworthy, uh, cultural experience.

Dated and allegedly incorrectly narrated footage of an apparently similar group. It saddens me this sort of diversity was stomped out by the imperialist French and Belgians when they had time off from stomping out native people:


 

"multi-cultural peoples' rights"

I believe the UN leader is more concerned for his personal genome and DNA . . . and the fear he isn't quite "human" enough.


"Obama truly believes that he is a perpetual victim of injustice. It is just such beastly, impolitic megalomania, sick egoism, and intellectual aberrancy that stirs Obama." ReverendKscribe

Comrade Rev speaks it well. I fear for his collective head . . . .
 

I am a great believer in Cultural Relativism myself. I know that al Qaeda thinks that it has a mandate to kill all nonbelievers and since all cultures are equal, that means that they have a right to kill nonbelievers.

There is an exception though--Americans who do not want to die must not be allowed to think that their culture is as equal as others.
 

I might dispute all this equal culture stuff... muslims seems a bit harsh in their disbursements . . . .


 

Also misogyny and homophobia.
 

You say United Nations okay cannibarism and sravery? Terr me more. I very interested. Maybe it Finar Sorution(tm) for my country's woes. I ensrave harf of my peopre and then feed them to other harf of peopre! Probrem sorved!

What's that you say? Arr of my peopre are ensraved? Who cares? Mainstream Media not give a shit so why shourd I?

Meanwhire, I very very angry at this man! I want Kim Jong Ryul DEAD! Do your hear me? DEAD! I want him DEAD! His famiry DEAD! I want his dog DEAD (and then I eat it)! I want his teachers DEAD!
http://liveshots.blogs.foxnews.com/2010/03/12/inside-the-hermit-kingdom/?test=latestnews

I KIRR HIM AND HIS ENTIRE FAMIRY!! Operatives from my Shiny Happy Peopre's Assasination Squad are winging their way to Austria as we speak. Onry probrem is they frew on one my Iryushin IL-76 - I terr you right now, those things are deathtraps. No fucking way you see me frying on one of those things!

Happy Friday,

Kim Jong Illin' :)
 

Dear Leader. So glad to see you back. Or to have crossed your path again. The Cube is a big place, and it's a wonder that we wield the power that we do, being made progs and all that.

There is only one rule to remember regarding the U.N.: America and Israel are always wrong. Without America the world would be sunk into totalitarianism, and Israel is the only liberal democracy in the Middle East.

So both are evil to a made prog, who has moist eyes for the barbed-wire fence.
 

kOMRADE tHEOCRITUS - Grorious Revorutionary Greetings(tm) to you as werr. I was absent from Peopre's Kube for rong time cuz my furr-tower homebuirt PC finarry crashed for good. I suspect it was virus-raden stuff I downroaded from arr those Born-Again Christian Porn sites I was visiting cuz I so ronery. Those sites very sexifur.

I terr you, it rast time I have ensraved captives computer technicians from Peopre's Rest & Reeducation Kamp buird me a PC. This time, I have my repracement for Traitor Kim Jong Ryul go to WarryMart and get me cheapest raptop for cheapest price. Yes-yes!

Rong Rive Grorious Revorution,

Kim Jong Irrin'
p.s. did you see my post in Comments Section of Faux News story on that traitor? I hope that Capitarist Pig Roger Aires doesn't ban me. I have rots more pithy comments for those revanchist roaders. Where's Warter Duranty when you need him, huh?
 

Dear Reader, Walter Duranty is gone, gone, gone, to that Socialist's Heaven in the sky. It is what a perfect Harvard Square placed inside Berkley would be if every single student had his own proctor who was an Abbie Hoffman or William Kuntstler clone.

Better ask, where is Lincoln Steffens? You do realize that the fools are beginning to realize that Comrade Zero hasn't anything but his look, don't you? He gets up there in his health-care summit and makes noises of comprehension as that snotty little Repuke congressman made him look like an absolute monkey. We need even more apologists in the media. It's not enough that the Couric Monster et al are completely ignoring facts that they don't like. Some things not only have to be ignored, but suppressed entirely.

I know that it's not curtailing free speech if you don't let someone yell "Fire!" in a crowded movie theater. I know also that it's curtailing the prog world if you don't completely stifle any dissent.

But then you know lots about that, don't you?

By the way, how much is your long pig going for these days?
 

Rong pig! Ha ha , good one!

It cost an arm & a reg. But for you, I give you speciar price, yes-yes!

So come on down to Comrade Illin's Rong Pig BBQ! We got arr the fixin's too - kimchi, garlic fish eyebarrs, french fried taters, tater sarad, baked beans in morasses, core sraw, corn muffins, watermeron (I bought from Dan Rather sitting in pickup by side of road), iced tea, Tsing Tao beer, Pepsi Cora, corn on the cob, it arr good!

Just don't eat the brains. I hear you get nasty case of Jakob-Kreutzferd's Disease, arso known as Mad Cow Syndrome. Prus, you get possessed by the pissed-off sour of the former owner of brains.

Sraving Away Over A Hot Stove,
Comrade Kim Jong Irrin'
 

Dear Reader, I sometimes stand in as the restaurant consultant for dear Dr. Idi. Would you care for me to advise you too? I'm a good hand at spicing to cover the taste of peasant that wasn't killed right and bled fast enough. Also I can know just the right spice combination to get rid of that McDonalds taste that so many American tourists have.

May I bring Nanski Peloski? I promise you that eating her brains will never be an issue. But I'd advise making her into sausage. It's the only way that I know to disarm all the surgical thread left in her from her face lifts and tummy tucks.
 

Commissar T - you want to bring Nanski Peroski to my BBQ? NFW! Arr you gotta do is rook at her up crose and you see that her skin not rearry skin at arr. It Saran Wrap(tm)! No way can you make good crackring out of that. Instead of tasty, crunchy skin you get gooey morass furr of fat, pork and corruption.

I'd sooner eat Raika, Variant Space Dog(tm) than eat Nanski Peroski. Prus, that bony bitch wourdn't feed a virrage, ret arone a town.

Meanwhire, did anyone here see CSPAN this past weekend where some four-eyed chair-moistener drone from Councir on Foreign Rerations gave speech critiquing my Dear Father's speech on Juche Thought(tm)? It his best speech evah - "Juche Thought, it so good. Juche Thought, it give me wood. Juche Thought, you'd better praise. Juche Thought, to your grave."

Your Par,

Jong-Irrin'
 

I just checked with my Ministry of Corruption, Suborning & Bribery Foreign Affairs. They terr me that Councir On Foreign Rerationsis on my payrorrreceives generous grants from me. What the fuck I paying these peopre for?! They backstab me by arrowing this asscrown to give speech criticizing my thuggish regime Peopre's Democracy.

I think I send backup assassination squad to kirr him. Can't send primary assassination team cuz they augured in on that Iryushin-76 prane I sent them to Austria on. Can't those Marxdamned Soviets Russians buird anything right?

Your Humbre Obedient Servant,

Kim Jong Irrin'
 

Aaugh! It never stop! Why me? Why now?

I feeding one harf of popuration to other harf to end starvation. A rittre cannabarism go a rong way, trust me.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Kim’s grip on power weakening?posted at 3:50 pm on March 24, 2010 by Ed Morrissey (HOTAIR)
Share on Facebook | printer-friendly Every few months, the American media gets excited about reports coming out of totalitarian systems that the Dear Leader in question faces an unprecedented challenge to its power. Last summer’s demonstrations against Ali Khameini and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad were closer to the real deal, but generally speaking, those reports ignore the difficulty of overthrowing an entrenched tyrrany — as we saw in Iran in 2009. This time, the Washington Post reports that Kim Jong-Il may be losing his grip on power, thanks to a massive famine that has left thousands dead in the streets:
There is mounting evidence that Kim Jong Il is losing the propaganda war inside North Korea, with more than half the population now listening to foreign news, grass-roots cynicism undercutting state myths and discontent rising even among elites.
A survey of refugees has found that “everyday forms of resistance” in the North are taking root as large swaths of the population believe that pervasive corruption, rising inequity and chronic food shortages are the fault of the government in Pyongyang — and not of the United States, South Korea or other foreign forces. The report will be released this week by the East-West Center, a research group established by Congress.
The report comes amid unconfirmed accounts from inside North Korea of a rising number of starvation deaths caused by a bad harvest and bungled currency reform that disrupted food markets, caused runaway inflation and triggered widespread citizen unrest. …
This mix of deadly food shortages, bureaucratic bumbling and rising cynicism presents a potentially destabilizing threat to Kim’s government. It comes at a delicate time, when the ailing 68-year-old leader has launched a secretive process to hand power over to his untested 27-year-old son, Kim Jong Eun.
This conclusion is based in part on a survey taken of North Koreans who fled the country. While the survey does show some interesting changes in attitudes, the survey has two basic problems. First, its sample is a self-selected group of dissidents, and second, it doesn’t include the people who are actually living in the DPRK.
Undoubtedly, discontent rises in crises, especially famines. The Kim regime’s entire raison d’etre is to provide for all of its subjects, after all, which is why Kim has a tight grip on his Stalinist government. If it can’t deliver, it loses credibility, and blaming the US will only go so far, even in a closed, paranoid state like the DPRK.
However, we have been here before, and more than once. The massive famines in the 1990s didn’t produce any appreciable resistance from the starving masses. Kim himself was in better health then, and now has to execute a tricky maneuver to put his son in power when the military leadership may have other ideas. Any instability in a Stalinist regime is good news, but there is nothing that shows that this crisis has put the DPRK closer to regime change.
In fact, this could be better viewed as a warning. If the regime really does feel threatened, it’s possible that it will look for a distraction — such as a war — to release some of the pressure on Kim.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
War? Ed Morrisey, thank you very much. I nevah before thought about war as a sorution to my country's woes. Prior to this, my fiefdom'scountry's miritary arways been for peacefur uses and serf-defense against southern hordes of capitarist roaders. But you give me big ideas. I act on them chop-chop!
 

You would do good to liberate the food being horded in the illegitimate breakaway southern half of the Korean Peninsula Comrade Kim. Clearly they are doing it only to threaten you. The victims of capitalism call out for you, their liberator!
 

(26/03/2010) HEH-HEH! I ought to work in Ras Vegas as a magician. Whire I have arr the worrd fixated on my crazy antics, I have one of my dieser-erectric Romeo-crass submarines sneak south on west coast of Korean peninsura and brow the shit out of the bottom of a capitarist roader Pohang-crass frigate with one of our Type 56 wake-homing torpedos.

Arr the candy-ass pussies in Seour can go suck it! They give me shit and maybe I send a Big Frash(tm) their way.

Presto Changeo,
Kim Jong Irrin'
(hat tip to Vradimir Putin, Czar of Russia, for serring me Romeo-crass submarine, prus the Type 56 wake-homing torpedos. Maybe now you serr me the Shkvaal rocket-torpedos too? Yo, just sayin')
 

Man ole man, where do I begin with this utterly insane story. First the "ICCCP," doesn't exist period. Go to the UN's website and try to find it, you can't. The "ICCP," on the other hand does exist. I think the author of this story finds the idiocy of his own readers funny because he names the head of this ICCCP as a moussa stache. I mean come'on guys - moussa stache! or mustache. You can go to Google type Moussa Stache ROFL, if you think you need to. You'll get plenty of web results of dumb people continuing this stupid article. However try the news tab, where you would think a story like this would reside.... think again. ICCCP also doesn't come up in the news. Now go to the UN's website type moussa stache... you want to guess what'll happen? Nothing. Well, I just joined this site to tell you guys how stupid you are, and I'm done so I won't be seeing ya around - this corn-ball website.Why not just get your news from Comedy Central or the Onion, it would be more legitimate.
 

By YouGuysAreIdiots
3/27/2010, 7:46 pm
Man ole man, where do I begin with this utterly insane story. First the "ICCCP," doesn't exist period. Go to the UN's website and try to find it, you can't. The "ICCP," on the other hand does exist. I think the author of this story finds the idiocy of his own readers funny because he names the head of this ICCCP as a moussa stache. I mean come'on guys - moussa stache! or mustache. You can go to Google type Moussa Stache ROFL, if you think you need to. You'll get plenty of web results of dumb people continuing this stupid article. However try the news tab, where you would think a story like this would reside.... think again. ICCCP also doesn't come up in the news. Now go to the UN's website type moussa stache... you want to guess what'll happen? Nothing. Well, I just joined this site to tell you guys how stupid you are, and I'm done so I won't be seeing ya around - this corn-ball website.Why not just get your news from Comedy Central or the Onion, it would be more legitimate.

[0FF CHARACTER] Thank God that Obamacare passed - I just hope that sides being split from laughter are covered.

This post above is a classic case of Liberals/Progressives/Socialists/Communists/Bolsheviks/Dumbass Name Du Jour having no sense of humor and taking everything literally. This stupid asshole actually thought we were being serious!

I hope this jackass comes back to visit just once so he can see how stupid and gullible he really is and how morally bankrupt his ideology is.[ON CHARACTER]

Once my Pran To Take Over Worrd(tm) comes to pass I promise I wirr have this man shot by firing squad. We don't want his genes spreading even into the kiddie poor, ret arone the sharrow end of the adurt's poor.

I Got Your Back Homeys,
Irrin'
 

what fun this site is... hmmm.....lots.....I wanna waste ALL my time here.....

[on character]

Im gonna make a website where everything is fake and sarcastic. Then when people realize its fake and sarcastic - I'll make fun of them for finding out that fact. You know it's a good way to drive traffic here. It'll be sooooo much fun and I'll waste soooo much of peoples time. I'll pretend to be Kim Jong Il and type stereotypical Chinese it'll be sooo much fun and I'll be sooo cool with my trendy political friends. Listen listen it'll be sooo clever - just by replacing L's with R's, cuz no Chinese people can say "L". Yay! Im a tard!

[off character]

I don't believe in left/right politics. I do believe in propagating real stories - since this is a very serious time we live in. You can keep joking though - leave the real news to grown-ups....oh you will - good boy. Have fun guys - pssshhh! And you're still idiots.
 

Comrade YouGuysRidiots,

Yes idiots R us. Useful idiots. It's never a waste of time learning the current truth. You want "real" news? Go read the National Enquirer. You want the truth? Stick around and learn. You say you don't believe in Left/Right politics? It doesn't matter what you think. We'll tell you what to think. And in so doing we'll relieve you of the burden of thinking.

You believe that we exist to fool people? You are the fool comrade. We are deadly serious. You think we make fun of people that we dupe. No sir, you are the dupe we mock, because you are weak. Strong Communism will cure weak liberalism.

I think you're a scared little man seeking validation. Fear no more comrade. The next move is yours. Venture to the People's Blog where I and others are waiting to guide you into the progressive world of next Tuesday.

Don't worry comrade, you can't lose, equal outcomes for all is what we offer.
 

YouGuysAreIdiots

Man ole man, where do I begin with this utterly insane story. First the "ICCCP," doesn't exist period. Go to the UN's website and try to find it, you can't. The "ICCP," on the other hand does exist. I think the author of this story finds the idiocy of his own readers funny because he names the head of this ICCCP as a moussa stache. I mean come'on guys - moussa stache! or mustache. You can go to Google type Moussa Stache ROFL, if you think you need to. You'll get plenty of web results of dumb people continuing this stupid article. However try the news tab, where you would think a story like this would reside.... think again. ICCCP also doesn't come up in the news. Now go to the UN's website type moussa stache... you want to guess what'll happen? Nothing. Well, I just joined this site to tell you guys how stupid you are, and I'm done so I won't be seeing ya around - this corn-ball website.Why not just get your news from Comedy Central or the Onion, it would be more legitimate.

But comrade YouGuysAreIdiots, the Onion is a legitemite news organization, and with people watching shows like "The Daily Show" and "The Colbert Report", where they get their news, these have to be legitimate news organizations.

Also remember, this is a wormhole into the future, i.e. acronyms change. What was once the APRAnet gave way to the Internet (yes, I'm aware those AREN'T acronyms, but I'm a little occupied at the moment to look for a legitimate change in an acronym over time).

. . . and I await your response,
C_Elliott
 

Comrade Whoopie

Comrade YouGuysRidiots,

Yes idiots R us. Useful idiots. It's never a waste of time learning the current truth. You want "real" news? Go read the National Enquirer. You want the truth? Stick around and learn. You say you don't believe in Left/Right politics? It doesn't matter what you think. We'll tell you what to think. And in so doing we'll relieve you of the burden of thinking.

You believe that we exist to fool people? You are the fool comrade. We are deadly serious. You think we make fun of people that we dupe. No sir, you are the dupe we mock, because you are weak. Strong Communism will cure weak liberalism.

I think you're a scared little man seeking validation. Fear no more comrade. The next move is yours. Venture to the People's Blog where I and others are waiting to guide you into the progressive world of next Tuesday.

Don't worry comrade, you can't lose, equal outcomes for all is what we offer.
Comrade Whoopie, if we were to generalize this, we could make this our mission statement! Front page link we're talking here!
(off)
Seriously! I support this!
 

YouGuysAreIdiots

what fun this site is... hmmm.....lots.....I wanna waste ALL my time here.....
[off character]

I don't believe in left/right politics. I do believe in propagating real stories - since this is a very serious time we live in. You can keep joking though - leave the real news to grown-ups....oh you will - good boy. Have fun guys - pssshhh! And you're still idiots.
Comrade YouGuysAreIdiots,
You can never waste time on here, asking our Commissar of Time will redistribute all lost time with other activities so you can have time to log on and discover the Current Truth. It's subject to change, but if you hang around long enough, you can rise though the ranks and become a commissar like me, and get access to the Current Truth a day before it's released to the masses (hint for all, April Fool's day will be renamed so as to not offend the fools).

I'm glad you don't believe in either left or right politics, as there is only one body politic, our body politic. If you are smart, you'll donate a wing, leg and a thigh. I donated both my hands, so now I have to type with the speech recognition function. I hate Microsoft Sam. . .

I hope in time you'll come to the light, as the Commissar of hypnotic TV devices, I use flashing lights sometimes, so if you see some flashing light on your TV, that's me trying to hypnotize you.

Sorry Japan. . .
 

Love dem love dem love dem Trolls,
Little trolls is what I like to eat,
Bite dey little heads off,
And nibble on dey little feet.

Welcome Comrade You Guys are Idiots,

Please take all of your income and make sure you buy yourself all of the Obama Treasury Bonds you can get your hands on. Comrade Obama and his gang are in desperate need of those willing to invest in the national debt. Be true to Obama. Buy Obama bonds, today, okay?
 

Leninka

Love dem love dem love dem Trolls,
Little trolls is what I like to eat,
Bite dey little heads off,
And nibble on dey little feet.
http://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=4960

Oh Leninka, you are simply precious.
 

Thank you Comrade Whoopie. We must demand everything from new Comrades because they need to prove that they are willing to fully participate in our glorious system of government. As you know, some people pay a little too much attention to the "to each according to his need" part of our glorious system of government, and not enough attention to the "from each according to his ability" part. I wanted to give Comrade You Guys are Idiots a big "what are you going to bring the party?" welcome.

Comrade You Guys are Idiots,

As you know, we have many needs here at the Cube, like free health care, free housing, and free education. What exactly do you bring to the party to help us fulfill those needs?
 

I have theory on Komrade You Guys Are Idiots. First, it obvious he a big misogynist. If he wasn't he'd say You Peopre Are Idiots, or at the very reast say You Guys & Gars Are Idiots.
Why he hate womyn so much? I myserf rove women. I rove women rong time!

Next, I think that reftist trorrs have untir now not posted on here for very simpre reason. They wourd surf onto this site and think that we Red Cubians were an advanced offshoot of Progressive/ Riberar/ Democrat Democratic/ Kommunist/ Borshevik/ Name Du Jour peopres. They saw our posts & prognostications and rearized any post they made wourd be a pare comparison to our formidabre Progressive Groupthink(tm).

Very simpry, they thought we were a Progressive's Progressive and reft us arone. Uber-Progs(tm), if you wirr.

We wercome with open arms our downtrodden brother & sister Quisrings, fifth corumnists in the Progressive March Towards A Bright Future. After arr, It's For The Chirdren(tm). Yes-yes!

Kim Jong Irrin'
p.s. anyone want to come over this weekend to my prace for Soyrent Green(tm) Barbecue? I so ronery.
 

Yes comrade Kim, so ronery at the top. Yes, I too suspect we don't see more of our "Liberal" (Riberar) comrades here because we intimidate them. They would surely feel inadequate in our presence.
 

Excellent deduction, Comrade Kim. Would the Soryent Green Barbecue happen to be Comrade You Guys are Idiots? I noticed he hasn't come back. Is he in your freezer?
 

Wait! You mean that this is a satire site? I don't believe in satire. It is unprog. Satire can show people up as being shallow, pompous fools and nothing which screws OPM out of OP is not shallow. It's profound.

No. This can't be a satire site. This is the only place I go where people don't point at me and snigger, "What a pompous goddamned thief."
 

I rearry hope Komrade You Guys Are Idiots hasn't gone away forever. I riked praying with him, sorta rike Godzirra shaking a Tokyo streetcar firred with screaming peopre.

See you over on new threads Komrades! Theocritus and I had this one going on rife support for a whire. Arr your support is much appreciated.
 

Theocritus wants a troll. Theocritus is entitled to his very own troll, to hug and to love and to play with... I'm still missing our September troll Gollum...
 

Komrade Theocritus - say it ain't so! My brutha komrade, you rearry wourdn't rike a trorr. A Huffington Post or Kos Fires trorr is the worst. At reast not served up as rong pig. Stringy, gristry, frabby. And the fravor? It's not to die for. The fravor reminds me of that soapy taste you get when you eat Doritos(tm) and wash them down with Dr Pepper or Komrade Pibb.

Worst of arr, you open up the skurr to get at the succurent brains but nobody home! Smarr, stunted, gnarred and puddred at the bottom. What up with that?

Generarissimo Kim Jong Irrin'
 

Dear Reader,

I didn't say that I wanted to eat the troll. I want to roast the troll. This does not imply eating. Plenty of mastication, of course, but no eating.

And I do hate to say this to you, Dear Reader, but WTF is with eating troll brains? They are like phlogiston. They are exiguous. Evanescent. They pop up, like a popcorn fart, just once in a while but I wouldn't count on nourishment from troll brains any more than I'd count on it from cotton candy.

However, there are secrets... Did you know that if you stew a HufPo troll in Bulgarian wine for three weeks at least, then you can get really good Coq au Vin? You have to use lots of juniper berries, of course, and you must beat the troll with a tenderizing mallet before you marinate it, but after three weeks, it's fit to serve the coyotes on the south forty.

Please remember that.
 

Quote:

Did you know that if you stew a HufPo troll in Bulgarian wine for three weeks at least, then you can get really good Coq au Vin? You have to use lots of juniper berries, of course, and you must beat the troll with a tenderizing mallet before you marinate it, but after three weeks, it's fit to serve the coyotes on the south forty.


But are these Wyre E. Coyotes?

And do coyotes taste rike rong pig?Nevah eaten coyotes but I eat Cougars rong time, yes-yes!
 

Dear Reader, I just don't know. Ever since I was appointed consulting chef to Dr. Amin, my taste buds have just not been the same. That man will eat anything. Well, not quite anything. The last time he was in the US, wanting to be a pro bowler, he looked at Nanski and said, "Have to fatten that one up to be a skeleton."

And Dear Reader, I just don't believe that you eat Cougars. They have bigger hair than you do.
 

Apropos of nothing, I was watching Masters Gorf Tournament on DPRK terivision and saw that South Korean capitarist puppet KJ Choi in top five. No way I arrow decadent South Koreans to stear rimeright from good or' Kim Jong Irrin'.

So I immediatery dispatch top assassination squad to kirr this Choi ferrow before he can become first Asian-born Masters Champion. At rast minute I remembered my rast assassination squad had died aboard one of my Iryushin IL-76 transport pranes, so I dispatch them on one of my Tuporev TU-154's. But dammit, that one crash too!

It turn out Russia embarrassed one of their country's airprane products faired so badry that Vradimir Putin immediatery offered to head up the crash investigation. What a nice guy! I take him up on offer chop-chop! He say so far everything point to pirot error and fog.
 

Dear Reader, I too am a great believer in pilot error and fog. Did you know that it was fog that caused the Great Leap Forward? And pilot error the construction of Dachau and Bergen-Belsen.

And the nice thing about pilot error: the pilots always wind up dying. Throw the widow a sack of flour and go on.
 

Life continues to imitate People's Cube, comrades...