|The scandalous new cover of New Yorker Magazine, depicting Barack Obama dressed as a Muslim and his wife Michelle as a militant black supremacist, turns out to be nothing more than the first step in a bold new Democrat strategy of playing both hands while the opponent simply watches, stated Earnest Trutok, Assistant Deputy Undersecretary of Media Relations in the Obama Camp. "We have prepared a large pile of dirty and revolting images that show Barack and his family in a much worse light than this," Trutok added, admitting that the forthcoming cartoon is jarringly out-of-place in the traditionally progressive New Yorker. "We have no choice but to run them ourselves in the friendly media due the refusal of the Republican Party to play its proper role in the final months of the campaign," Trutok stated.|
Race-baiting is ugly when the Republicans do it. But when it can advance progress, it's OK.
"Therefore, we must not only brilliantly defend the integrity of our candidate, but also stage vicious attacks against him that would prove to the American Public that the Republicans are nothing more than racists and alarmists. The average voter will merely assume that such attacks are coming from the McCain camp," Trutok said.
"Our most potent weapon in this election is the continued victim status of our candidate," agrees Allyce Safir-Simpson, Senior Poll Analyst for the Obama campaign.
"We noticed a sharp downturn in poll numbers whenever Barack took any concrete position," she explained, referring to a dilemma that has dogged Sen. Obama since the early days of the campaign. "Our main point has always been Hope and Change, but it can get uncomfortable when some busybody asks what we actually mean by this. However, we notice a jump in the Senator's poll numbers every time we manufacture an incident that seems to imply that he is the victim of some form of hate crime."
Columbia professor of psychology and education Madonna Constantine (C) speaks during a rally outside the Teachers College of Columbia University in New York Oct. 10, 2007. People gathered outside the college protesting the discovery of a noose outside Constantine's office door.
This strategy is not exactly new, having been employed earlier this year by Columbia University psychology professor Madonna Constantine in an effort to deflect an investigation of alleged plagiarism. Professor Constantine, an African-American, manufactured a crude hangman's noose and hung it on her own office doorknob, then loudly claimed that she was the victim of a hate crime.
"Like Professor Constantine, we know that to play the race card convincingly, one must be a victim of race hatred," explained Safir-Simpson. "Professor Constantine banked on the fact that all allegations against a person of color are race-based. It doesn't matter if the allegations are true or not; what matters is that the target of the allegations achieves automatic victim status. We want to achieve the same effect for Barack, but the Republicans just won't do their part."
Obama '08 staffers were busy tying nooses long into the night, preparations that will continue until the Democratic Convention opens in Denver on 25 August.
"We want a rope swinging from every other streetlight along the parade route," said Trutok. "This will provide ample proof of the racist nature of the Republicans." Other projects for the Convention include strolling minstrel-type actors in blackface, caricatures of Barack and Michelle tucking in to a meal of fried chicken and watermelon, and a Photoshopped family portrait featuring Obama's daughters with their hair tied in twists of rag.
"We hate to take this step," said Safir-Simpson, "but the opposition has left us no choice. We really expected the Republicans to go for the kids before now. That was one of our first targets during the last election with the Bush daughters."
Quote:Allyce Safir-Simpson, would this be a decedent of the inventor of Measurement of the strength of a Hurricane?
Quote:"You don't have to be a weatherman to know which way the wind blows."
Quote:Don't they have a lacrosse team at the Naval Academy? If so, they can persuade the reactionaries to rape and make racial slurs to some poor oppressed black female cadet.
Ivan Betinov...It seems that many people (I won't go as far as to say "most" or even venture a haphazard guess as to what percentage this may be) would be quite content to trade the uncertainty of freedom for the certainty of serfdom and merely pray that they get a good lord to rule over them....
Quote:Don't they have a lacrosse team at the Naval Academy? If so, they can persuade the reactionaries to rape and make racial slurs to some poor oppressed black female cadet.
BigFurHat at 7/22/2008, 8:43 amCertification of Live Birf
Hoosier Army Mom's WeblogThe first hurdle will be having Obama produce his birth certificate, which so far he has refused to do, and prove that he was born in Hawaii on August 4, 1961, as he has always claimed. There is speculation that his American mother may have brought him to Honolulu shortly after his birth in Kenya , but no proof of that has been shown.
Quote:What difference does it make who was born where? We of Earth should all be one big global village. Besides, all this talk of U.S. citizenship only promotes dangerous ideas like nationalism, jingoism, and fascism. We should do away with the whole U.S. citizenship thing altogether. What's fair about granting U.S. citizenship to some people, while denying it to others? It does nothing but promote hatred and intolerance, making the U.S. seem like some exclusive country club for whities only.
Randy the NinjaMarshal Pupovich, you amaze me! Never in my life have I seen the collective function in such a seamless manner. Who would of ever guessed a dog would follow a trail to its end.
Red BubbaComparing a myth to a myth may be pushing our luck.
Quote:What next, adoring crowds in front of a monument moved to its present location in Berlin by a certain past chancellor of hope and change? How audacious can we be before the unwashed masses catch on?
Quote:What has happened with the delousing supply the Karl Marx Re-Education Center received?
Randy the NinjaWell gentlemen, being a resident of Denver I can say, that we are planning on using both methods for hippie control. First the delousing agent will be employed then when we run out of our allotment the urine will be used.
Marshal PupovichWhat is all this with the "unwashed masses?" What has happened with the delousing supply the Karl Marx Re-Education Center received?
Red BubbaRandy, great toga. I will be looking for you during the 24 hour all-network coverage of the coronation. Will you be bringing the "ninja's for Obama" banner again this year?
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