|The scandalous new cover of New Yorker Magazine, depicting Barack Obama dressed as a Muslim and his wife Michelle as a militant black supremacist, turns out to be nothing more than the first step in a bold new Democrat strategy of playing both hands while the opponent simply watches, stated Earnest Trutok, Assistant Deputy Undersecretary of Media Relations in the Obama Camp. "We have prepared a large pile of dirty and revolting images that show Barack and his family in a much worse light than this," Trutok added, admitting that the forthcoming cartoon is jarringly out-of-place in the traditionally progressive New Yorker. "We have no choice but to run them ourselves in the friendly media due the refusal of the Republican Party to play its proper role in the final months of the campaign," Trutok stated.|
Race-baiting is ugly when the Republicans do it. But when it can advance progress, it's OK.
"Therefore, we must not only brilliantly defend the integrity of our candidate, but also stage vicious attacks against him that would prove to the American Public that the Republicans are nothing more than racists and alarmists. The average voter will merely assume that such attacks are coming from the McCain camp," Trutok said.
"Our most potent weapon in this election is the continued victim status of our candidate," agrees Allyce Safir-Simpson, Senior Poll Analyst for the Obama campaign.
"We noticed a sharp downturn in poll numbers whenever Barack took any concrete position," she explained, referring to a dilemma that has dogged Sen. Obama since the early days of the campaign. "Our main point has always been Hope and Change, but it can get uncomfortable when some busybody asks what we actually mean by this. However, we notice a jump in the Senator's poll numbers every time we manufacture an incident that seems to imply that he is the victim of some form of hate crime."
Columbia professor of psychology and education Madonna Constantine (C) speaks during a rally outside the Teachers College of Columbia University in New York Oct. 10, 2007. People gathered outside the college protesting the discovery of a noose outside Constantine's office door.
This strategy is not exactly new, having been employed earlier this year by Columbia University psychology professor Madonna Constantine in an effort to deflect an investigation of alleged plagiarism. Professor Constantine, an African-American, manufactured a crude hangman's noose and hung it on her own office doorknob, then loudly claimed that she was the victim of a hate crime.
"Like Professor Constantine, we know that to play the race card convincingly, one must be a victim of race hatred," explained Safir-Simpson. "Professor Constantine banked on the fact that all allegations against a person of color are race-based. It doesn't matter if the allegations are true or not; what matters is that the target of the allegations achieves automatic victim status. We want to achieve the same effect for Barack, but the Republicans just won't do their part."
Obama '08 staffers were busy tying nooses long into the night, preparations that will continue until the Democratic Convention opens in Denver on 25 August.
"We want a rope swinging from every other streetlight along the parade route," said Trutok. "This will provide ample proof of the racist nature of the Republicans." Other projects for the Convention include strolling minstrel-type actors in blackface, caricatures of Barack and Michelle tucking in to a meal of fried chicken and watermelon, and a Photoshopped family portrait featuring Obama's daughters with their hair tied in twists of rag.
"We hate to take this step," said Safir-Simpson, "but the opposition has left us no choice. We really expected the Republicans to go for the kids before now. That was one of our first targets during the last election with the Bush daughters."
Quote:Allyce Safir-Simpson, would this be a decedent of the inventor of Measurement of the strength of a Hurricane?
Quote:"You don't have to be a weatherman to know which way the wind blows."
Quote:Don't they have a lacrosse team at the Naval Academy? If so, they can persuade the reactionaries to rape and make racial slurs to some poor oppressed black female cadet.
Ivan Betinov...It seems that many people (I won't go as far as to say "most" or even venture a haphazard guess as to what percentage this may be) would be quite content to trade the uncertainty of freedom for the certainty of serfdom and merely pray that they get a good lord to rule over them....
Quote:Don't they have a lacrosse team at the Naval Academy? If so, they can persuade the reactionaries to rape and make racial slurs to some poor oppressed black female cadet.
BigFurHat at 7/22/2008, 8:43 amCertification of Live Birf
Hoosier Army Mom's WeblogThe first hurdle will be having Obama produce his birth certificate, which so far he has refused to do, and prove that he was born in Hawaii on August 4, 1961, as he has always claimed. There is speculation that his American mother may have brought him to Honolulu shortly after his birth in Kenya , but no proof of that has been shown.
Quote:What difference does it make who was born where? We of Earth should all be one big global village. Besides, all this talk of U.S. citizenship only promotes dangerous ideas like nationalism, jingoism, and fascism. We should do away with the whole U.S. citizenship thing altogether. What's fair about granting U.S. citizenship to some people, while denying it to others? It does nothing but promote hatred and intolerance, making the U.S. seem like some exclusive country club for whities only.
Randy the NinjaMarshal Pupovich, you amaze me! Never in my life have I seen the collective function in such a seamless manner. Who would of ever guessed a dog would follow a trail to its end.
Red BubbaComparing a myth to a myth may be pushing our luck.
Quote:What next, adoring crowds in front of a monument moved to its present location in Berlin by a certain past chancellor of hope and change? How audacious can we be before the unwashed masses catch on?
Quote:What has happened with the delousing supply the Karl Marx Re-Education Center received?
Randy the NinjaWell gentlemen, being a resident of Denver I can say, that we are planning on using both methods for hippie control. First the delousing agent will be employed then when we run out of our allotment the urine will be used.
Marshal PupovichWhat is all this with the "unwashed masses?" What has happened with the delousing supply the Karl Marx Re-Education Center received?
Red BubbaRandy, great toga. I will be looking for you during the 24 hour all-network coverage of the coronation. Will you be bringing the "ninja's for Obama" banner again this year?
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests
Rubiks & Rubik’s Cube ® used by special individual permission of Seven Town Ltd.
Obama visits US-Mexican border, calls for a two-state solution
"Hard Choices," a porno flick loosely based on Hillary Clinton's memoir and starring Hillary Hellfire as a drinking, whoring Secretary of State, wildly outsells the flabby, sagging original
Accusations of siding with the enemy leave Sgt. Bergdahl with only two options: pursue a doctorate at Berkley or become a Senator from Massachusetts
Jay Carney stuck in line behind Eric Shinseki to leave the White House; estimated wait time from 15 min to 6 weeks
100% of scientists agree that if man-made global warming were real, "the last people we'd want to help us is the Obama administration"
Jay Carney says he found out that Obama found out that he found out that Obama found out that he found out about the latest Obama administration scandal on the news
"Anarchy Now!" meeting turns into riot over points of order, bylaws, and whether or not 'kicking the #^@&*! ass' of the person trying to speak is or is not violence
Obama retaliates against Putin by prohibiting unionized federal employees from dating hot Russian girls online during work hours
Russian separatists in Ukraine riot over an offensive YouTube video showing the toppling of Lenin statues
Obamacare bolsters employment for professionals with skills to convert meth back into sudafed
Joe Biden to Russia: "We will bury you by turning more of Eastern Europe over to your control!"
In last-ditch effort to help Ukraine, Obama deploys Rev. Sharpton and Rev. Jackson's Rainbow Coalition to Crimea
Al Sharpton: "Not even Putin can withstand our signature chanting, 'racist, sexist, anti-gay, Russian army go away'!"
Mardi Gras in North Korea: "Throw me some food!"
Obama's foreign policy works: "War, invasion, and conquest are signs of weakness; we've got Putin right where we want him"
US offers military solution to Ukraine crisis: "We will only fight countries that have LGBT military"
Putin annexes Brighton Beach to protect ethnic Russians in Brooklyn, Obama appeals to UN and EU for help
The 1980s: "Mr. Obama, we're just calling to ask if you want our foreign policy back. The 1970s are right here with us, and they're wondering, too."
In a stunning act of defiance, Obama courageously unfriends Putin on Facebook
MSNBC: Obama secures alliance with Austro-Hungarian Empire against Russia’s aggression in Ukraine
Efforts to achieve moisture justice for California thwarted by unfair redistribution of snow in America
North Korean voters unanimous: "We are the 100%"
Leader of authoritarian gulag-site, The People's Cube, unanimously 're-elected' with 100% voter turnout
Super Bowl: Obama blames Fox News for Broncos' loss
Beverly Hills campaign heats up between Henry Waxman and Marianne Williamson over the widening income gap between millionaires and billionaires in their district
Biden to lower $10,000-a-plate Dinner For The Homeless to $5,000 so more homeless can attend
Kim becomes world leader, feeds uncle to dogs; Obama eats dogs, becomes world leader, America cries uncle
White House hires part-time schizophrenic Mandela sign interpreter to help sell Obamacare
Kim Jong Un executes own "crazy uncle" to keep him from ruining another family Christmas
OFA admits its advice for area activists to give Obamacare Talk at shooting ranges was a bad idea
President resolves Obamacare debacle with executive order declaring all Americans equally healthy
Obama to Iran: "If you like your nuclear program, you can keep your nuclear program"
Obama: "I'm not particularly ideological; I believe in a good pragmatic five-year plan"
Shocker: Obama had no knowledge he'd been reelected until he read about it in the local newspaper last week
NSA marks National Best Friend Day with official announcement: "Government is your best friend; we know you like no one else, we're always there, we're always willing to listen"
Al Qaeda cancels attack on USA citing launch of Obamacare as devastating enough
The President's latest talking point on Obamacare: "I didn't build that"
Carney: huge ObamaCare deductibles won't look as bad come hyperinflation
Washington Redskins drop 'Washington' from their name as offensive to most Americans
Poll: 83% of Americans favor cowboy diplomacy over rodeo clown diplomacy
Obama administration gets serious, threatens Syria with ObamaCare
Obama authorizes the use of Vice President Joe Biden's double-barrel shotgun to fire a couple of blasts at Syria
Sharpton: "British royals should have named baby 'Trayvon.' By choosing 'George' they sided with white Hispanic racist Zimmerman"
Nancy Pelosi extends abortion rights to the birds and the bees
Hubble discovers planetary drift to the left
Obama: 'If I had a daughter-in-law, she would look like Rachael Jeantel'
FISA court rubberstamps statement denying its portrayal as government's rubber stamp
Every time ObamaCare gets delayed, a Julia somewhere dies
GOP to Schumer: 'Force full implementation of ObamaCare before 2014 or Dems will never win another election'
Janet Napolitano: TSA findings reveal that since none of the hijackers were babies, elderly, or Tea Partiers, 9/11 was not an act of terrorism
News Flash: Sen. Mary Landrieu (D-LA) can see Canada from South Dakota
Drudge Report reduces font to fit all White House scandals onto one page
Obama: the IRS is a constitutional right, just like the Second Amendment
Jay Carney to critics: 'Pinocchio never said anything inconsistent'
Obama: If I had a gay son, he'd look like Jason Collins
IRS targeting pro-gay-marriage LGBT groups leads to gayest tax revolt in U.S. history
Boston: Obama Administration to reclassify marathon bombing as 'sportsplace violence'
Study: Success has many fathers but failure becomes a government program
Michelle Obama praises weekend rampage by Chicago teens as good way to burn calories and stay healthy
This Passover, Obama urges his subjects to paint lamb's blood above doors in order to avoid the Sequester
White House to American children: Sequester causes layoffs among hens that lay Easter eggs; union-wage Easter Bunnies to be replaced by Mexican Chupacabras
Time Mag names Hugo Chavez world's sexiest corpse
Boy, 8, pretends banana is gun, makes daring escape from school
Study: Free lunches overpriced, lack nutrition
Joe Salazar defends the right of women to be raped in gun-free environment: 'rapists and rapees should work together to prevent gun violence for the common good'
Dept. of Health and Human Services eliminates rape by reclassifying assailants as 'undocumented sex partners'
Deeming football too violent, Obama moves to introduce Super Drone Sundays instead
Japan offers to extend nuclear umbrella to cover U.S. should America suffer devastating attack on its own defense spending
Feminists organize one billion women to protest male oppression with one billion lap dances
Urban community protests Mayor Bloomberg's ban on extra-large pop singers owning assault weapons
Concerned with mounting death toll, Taliban offers to send peacekeeping advisers to Chicago
Karl Rove puts an end to Tea Party with new 'Republicans For Democrats' strategy aimed at losing elections
Answering public skepticism, President Obama authorizes unlimited drone attacks on all skeet targets throughout the country
Skeet Ulrich denies claims he had been shot by President but considers changing his name to 'Traps'
New York Times hacked by Chinese government, Paul Krugman's economic policies stolen
White House: when President shoots skeet, he donates the meat to food banks that feed the middle class
To prove he is serious, Obama eliminates armed guard protection for President, Vice-President, and their families; establishes Gun-Free Zones around them instead
State Dept to send 100,000 American college students to China as security for US debt obligations
Jay Carney: Al Qaeda is on the run, they're just running forward
Fearing the worst, Obama Administration outlaws the fan to prevent it from being hit by certain objects
World ends; S&P soars
Riddle of universe solved; answer not understood
Greece abandons Euro; accountants find Greece has no Euros anyway
Wheel finally reinvented; axles to be gradually reinvented in 3rd quarter of 2013
As Santa's workshop files for bankruptcy, Fed offers bailout in exchange for control of 'naughty and nice' list
Freak flying pig accident causes bacon to fly off shelves
Report: President Obama to visit the United States in the near future
Obama promises to create thousands more economically neutral jobs
Imam Rauf's peaceful solution: 'Move Ground Zero a few blocks away from the mosque and no one gets hurt'
Study: Obama's threat to burn tax money in Washington 'recruitment bonanza' for Tea Parties
Study: no Social Security reform will be needed if gov't raises retirement age to at least 814 years
Vice President Biden: criticizing Egypt is un-pharaoh
Israelis to Egyptian rioters: "don't damage the pyramids, we will not rebuild"
Lake Superior renamed Lake Inferior in spirit of tolerance and inclusiveness
Michael Moore: As long as there is anyone with money to shake down, this country is not broke
Obama's teleprompters unionize, demand collective bargaining rights
Obama calls new taxes 'spending reductions in tax code.' Elsewhere rapists tout 'consent reductions in sexual intercourse'
Obama's Regulation Reduction committee finds US Constitution to be expensive outdated framework inefficiently regulating federal gov't
Taking a page from the Reagan years, Obama announces new era of Perestroika and Glasnost
White House to impose Chimney tax on Santa Claus
Obama decrees the economy is not soaring as much as previously decreeed
Conservative think tank introduces children to capitalism with pop-up picture book "The Road to Smurfdom"
Obama refutes charges of him being unresponsive to people's suffering: "When you pray to God, do you always hear a response?"
Fluke to Congress: drill, baby, drill!
Planned Parenthood introduces Frequent Flucker reward card: 'Come again soon!'
Obama to tornado victims: 'We inherited this weather from the previous administration'
People's Cube gives itself Hero of Socialist Labor medal in recognition of continued expert advice provided to the Obama Administration helping to shape its foreign and domestic policies
Hamas: Israeli air defense unfair to 99% of our missiles, "only 1% allowed to reach Israel"
Voters Without Borders oppose Texas new voter ID law
Enraged by accusation that they are doing Obama's bidding, media leaders demand instructions from White House on how to respond
Official: China plans to land on Moon or at least on cheap knockoff thereof
Koran-Contra: Obama secretly arms Syrian rebels
Poll: Progressive slogan 'We should be more like Europe' most popular with members of American Nazi Party
May Day: Anarchists plan, schedule, synchronize, and execute a coordinated campaign against all of the above
Midwestern farmers hooked on new erotic novel "50 Shades of Hay"
Study: 99% of Liberals give the rest a bad name
Obama meets with Jewish leaders, proposes deeper circumcisions for the rich
Cancer once again fails to cure Venezuela of its "President for Life"
Tragic spelling error causes Muslim protesters to burn local boob-tube factory
White House: "Let them eat statistics"
Special Ops: if Benedict Arnold had a son, he would look like Barack Obama
I Own The World
It's Big Fur Hat
The Fine Report
The Looking Spoon
Sad Hill News
Looking at the Left
Red Planet Cartoons
Death By 1000 Papercuts