He refers, of course, to a controversial anti-savage poster proposed by Pamela Geller to New York's Metropolitan Transit Authority: In any war between the civilized man and the savage, support the civilized man.
"I am proud of my savage heritage," says Mr. Mohammed. "And I am deeply offended by Geller's insinuation that a savage somehow doesn't deserve the support of New York straphangers."
He adds: "But Allah be praised, the famously open-minded MTA has rejected that hateful ad, seeing it as a direct insult to all savages on New York subways.
"I and my team of covert media manipulators have worked very hard on redefining the meaning of savagery as 'differently civilized.' It is frustrating to see our multi-million-dollar efforts squandered only because people like Pamela Geller have a grotesquely selfish craving for life and liberty. Why can't she be more like your Mayor Bloomberg and other New Yorkers?" wonders Mr. Mohammed.
Standing on the steps to United Sates Courthouse in Manhattan, he scans the city skyline with his sad, brooding eyes, making mental notes about the landmarks in need of controlled demolition.
"All we want is to do the right thing and turn America into a subsidiary of the coming global caliphate," he sighs. "Is that too much to ask?"
A group of sympathetic New Yorkers from various progressive organizations have come to the courthouse with their spontaneously pre-printed signs, in order to support Mr. Mohammed's right to the ritualistic slaughter of the unbelievers, and to help him prevent people like Geller from speaking their minds.
"There is no freedom in this country if peaceful fanatics like Mr. Mohammed are being harassed for merely trying to dominate the world," says a grandmotherly old lady in a Che Guevara sweatshirt and a sign that says "If one of us is not free to terrorize the rest of us, then none of us is free!"
The group's organizer, wearing a red bandanna with an artistically stenciled hammer and sickle, weighs in: "Today's rally is part of our effort to help all Muslims of the world to accept our definition of them as an oppressed minority under the umbrella of international Marxism."
"As a Jew, I'm somewhat ambivalent about their obsession with Jew killing," he added. "But their disdain for Western bourgeois morals makes them a great asset in our revolutionary struggle. The opportunity to recruit 1.2 billion Muslim comrades is just too good to let go. And if that means watching a few million Jews pushed into the sea, I say it's for the greater good. We'll sort our philosophical differences after the Western civilization collapses. I think."
Some of this support comes in the form of propaganda posters that expand on Mr. Mohammed's original idea. Relying on imagery that has become part of popular culture, these signs make it easier for most Americans to swallow the message.
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