Chairman M. S. Punchenko
Laika the Space Dog
A Prayer before you vote:
Our Savior who is Barack
Thy middle name is Hussein
Thy Welfare come
Confiscate all guns
And Spreading the wealth is heaven
Taketh away our daily bread
And giveth to those who tresspass against work
Lead us not into prosperity
For all earnings are evil
For thine is the pollsters, the media, and Hollywood.
Forever and ever
Now take the day off.
And don't forget the Molotov cocktails for tonight's celebration!
What's a Party™ without a little broken glass, looting, burning cars..etc?
Reporting in from Small Town, NC. Chairman M. S. Punchenko
Just returned from Dr's office. Raining but peoples lining up at polls. Is good. Washes dirt from any necro-voters and cleaned my shovel.
After "New Dawn" tommorow won't have to pay said Dr bill. Or for gas in my car or make mortgage payment. Life in Omerica will be good.
The crybabies at townhall.com are already whining about our dear leaders fairness at the polls in Philly. Have the right wingers no shame?!?!?
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
A Repeat of 2004 Philly Voter Chaos, Fraud
Posted by: Amanda Carpenter at 7:46 AM
GOP Election Board members have been tossed out of polling stations in at least half a dozen polling stations in Philadelphia because of their party status.
A Pennsylvania judge previously ruled that court-appointed poll watchers could be NOT removed from their boards by an on-site election judge, but that is exactly what is happening.
It is the duty of election board workers to monitor and guard the integrity of the voting process.
Denying access to the minority (in this case Republican) poll watchers and inspectors is a violation of Pennsylvania state law. Those who violate the law can be punished with a misdemeanor and subjected to a fine of $1,000 and sent to prison between one month and two years.
Those on site are describing the situation as "pandemonium" and there may be video coming of the chaos.
Some of the precincts where Republicans have been removed are: the 44th Ward, 12th and 13th divisions; 6th Ward, 12th division; 32nd Ward, Division 28.
“Election board officials guard the legitimacy of the election process and the idea that Republicans are being intimidated and banned for partisan purposes does not allow for an honest and open election process,” said McCain-Palin spokesman Ben Porritt in a statement to Townhall.
The City of Brotherly Love was roiled in controversy during the 2004 election because of rigged voting machines that showed nearly 2,000 votes for Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry before the polls had opened. A man also used a gun to intimidate poll workers at Ward 30, division 11 in 2004.
Have to take small trip to SC (is only 30 miles away).
Will have peoples report on return.
Over and out comrades.
Laika the Space Dog
Glorious strides are being made here in Pennsylvania!
Our listening post in Pittsburgh intercepted an enemy transmission coming from a Bitter Clinger known as Jim Quinn that another Bitter Clinger overheard a Party Commissar giving voting instructions to a Young Pioneer:
"Vote very slowly. See all those people standing behind you, they're Republicans, and they have to go to work."
This Mt. Lebanongrad Commissar is to be complimented on political instruction, but please make sure all Commissars WHISPER these instructions as not to be overheard.
The enemy doesn't necessarily need to know our battle plans!
Comrades I report to you today for the Peoples Collective of Suwanee located in the Peoples Republik of Goergia. Glorious news. The district Commissars are passing out pre filled out ballots. All one need do is to make his mark on it and drop it in the ballot box.
There have been a few trouble makers, but they were quickly quelled by the marvelous peoples police dogs. Victory is at hand comrades.
I shall drink heavily from the vodka bottle tonight.
Reporting from Collective of Smyrna Georgia, not far from aforementioned Suwanee Collective. Similar news, many shovels. We rejoice, as it appears that our once reliably red Collective of Georgia may now turn blue.
Surprised I didn't get arrested in line for having a shirt with a hammer and sickle, after watching ridiculously left leaning news coverage of someone with an Obama shirt being removed from line for violating state anti-campaigning laws at a polling place.
I am sad to report that the evil redneck state of Al'obama will not vote for our Savior! Two weeks ago, I personally flew on the great People's Jet there to see the disaster for myself.. I arrived this morning. But on the brighter side, when Lord Obama wins, I think we have found a location for our new gulags.. Those greedy kapitalists have ruffled my fur for the last time.. Obama will take care of them..
I have trekked to the breakaway republic known as Staten Island and have observed not so many voters for the One, but i am sure they are hiding their intentions, to avoid the voter police like in Philly, and will, when as close the booth curtains, become suddenly and ardently enraptured by the One and vote for him (though isn't the One truly above such issues as gender, sweetie).
As a good standing member of the Party i voted as often as i could.
Comrades, reporting in, I voted 122 times today, thank you ACORN!
Just returned from trip to small town SC.
Report as follows:
Raining in SC and here in NC. Good rain for cotton fields I passed. No happy workers in fields though. Glorious One has given them the day off. (please....not a racist comment......we really do have cotton fields down here)
Past 3 graveyards. No fresh, open graves. Guess no need to bother the dead. NC & SC already in the bag.
Peoples going in to polling places. No lines. Peoples seem serious though. Must be the rain.
Petrol only $2.34
Note to Party members in Philly:
Cool it...Not yet brothers and sisters.....We're sooooo close!
Great Stalin's Ghost
Here in Michigan, I arrived at my polling place at 6:45 AM. Due to the long line, it took me an hour to vote. I was thankful though, as this was good practice for waiting in the upcoming bread lines when the Anointed One is officially anointed.
Here in the mid-Atlantic seaboard, all is going better than expected.
I personally had the high honor of ladling out the ObaMessiah(tm) KoolAde to true believers at all 31 district polling stations here --- each of which I voted at, thanks to my ACORN "Vote Early, Vote Often" card.
To all those BusHitler miscreants who cried foul, claiming that only citizens should be able to vote, and to only vote once, in their assigned district, I cried out that magic word that cows all such reactionary capitalist tools into immediate submission: "RACIST!!!" And of course, ObaMessiah(tm)-worshipping tools in the MSM swarmed these dissidents, shoved microphones and cameras in their faces, and demanded to know the date of their last cross-burning, and whether or not they had their KKK membership cards on hand. My fellow comrades and comradettes, it was truly glorious!!!
As you've probably seen, in Pennsylvania, our black comrades took matters into their own hands, harassing and threatening any Republican stooges who attempted to examine voting rolls, to confirm whether or not illegal aliens, dead people, cartoon characters and other classes whom America has been victimizing and discriminating against, were registered to vote. And the MSM slavishly ignored it all, while focusing on whether or not Bristol Palin's menstrual cycles are regular or not.
Comrades (and comradettes), we are on the cusp of a glorious, progressive revolution, and the final subversion of the U.S. Constitution. We are about to elect America's first Marxist president, and better still, anyone who criticizes him, or in any way exposes the danger he presents to freedom, will be intimidated into glorious silence by our friends in the MSM.
Oh, happy days!!!
Viva le revolution!!! (and pass that KoolAde!!!)
On this joyous occasion, I am about to break the shackles of my evil capitalist enslaver and go vote for the glorious future of the United Soviet States of Amerika, the paradise that the Obamessiah has promised to deliver to all of us tomorrow. Already, I have heard of "computer problems" here in the People's Socialist Republic of Fairtax County, VA. WELL DONE, ACORN!!! There is no doubt that The Anointed One, The Obamessiah, will easily take The People's Commonwealth of Virginia.
There are 2 people we need to thank that made The Obamessiah's victory possible here in the PCVA. First, I want to thank myself. For coordinating ACORN's "Get The Necro Proxies Out To Vote" drive. And for getting my young brownshirt students to the polling places to ensure that the proles cast the "correct" vote. And secondly to Comrade Chairman Meowsevich S. Punchenko and his outstanding
blackmail and strong armed robbery fundraising efforts. Chairman Meow serves as an inspiration to all Young Pioneers who work diligently for his Socialist dream of free scotch and miscellaneous hallucinogenic chemicals. Salute, Comrade Chairman!!!
Zampolit Boris Sukavich Blokhayev
A small world indeed. The Kennesaw Gulag is where I report daily for shoveling!
A bit more news from the Deep South region, as a federal judge has smote the Chosen One by upholding the evil voter ID law here. Thus accordingly I did pass a few polling places with lines that contained several incarnations of the great Mickey Mouse, as the dead have yet to walk here. It's rumored that glorious Party officials are already en route to said judge's residence to purge him.
Reporting in from Columbus, OH
In a sign of things to come during the reign of Glorious Leader, his minions where in full force annoying oppressed voters to cast a vote for the Vanguard party. One rogue republikkkan is reported to have informed the authorities because they are "violating Ohio's electioneering laws." Hopefully the New Black Panther Party will be in immediately to address the situation.
Happy to report that here in the deep, damned redneck south, I saw many known Progressives at the polls this morning. (I should mentioned however, that this is the precinct where many professors from nearby Big State U. live.) Sadly, I'm sure that my wretched state will remain "red" in the currently misapplied vernacular but soon the entire country will be freed of this menace of RethugliKKKan-KKKonservatism and the outdated, disproven concept of individualism.
Red November arrives today, Comrades! The Glorious dawn of the Utopian Socialist State of America is soon to follow!
All hail The Beloved One!
Commissar M said:
"Red November arrives today, Comrades! The Glorious dawn of the Utopian Socialist State of America is soon to follow!" [Color emphasis added by yours truly]
Commissar M, your visage appears to indicate you're too young to remember that in virtually all color-television broadcasts of election coverage before the Year 2000 when BushHitler stole the election from yours truly, Gorbels Cube, the broadcast networks used the color blue to denote states declared for Republican and red for states declared for Democrats.
Perceiving this habit as one that unfairely (though accurately, of course) associated our gloriously progressive party with the collectivist agenda, our dutiful followers in the broadcast media collectively agreed in 2000 that the color blue would be used to denote Democratic victories and with red for Republican victories. Virtually no one in the Amerian electorate noticed this subliminal message that our party was "true blue" rather than collectivist in its agenda. This gave cover for expansion of our base to include those who previously had been suspicious of our true colors.
Amazingly, the Republicans accepted this change and began proudly calling themselves "Red Staters." (Remember, Lenin assured us the capitalists would furnish the rope for their own hanging.) Of course, this will make it far earier for them to accomodate themselves to our victory today-- especially now that you have "let the cat out of the bag" by officially admitting that our goal is for a a collectivist "Red November." The only question left is whether Chairman Obama, when he confronts his first international crisis, will ask for "One Ping Only," or will instead ask "What is a 'ping'?"
My greatest due respects to Gorbels Cube, but wasn't it in fact the great Stalin that said the Capitalists would sell him the rope he'd hang them with?
I have been listening to the glorious news on NPR. REJOICE!! They have interviewed only voters for THE ONE, so it follows, only THE ONE is getting the votes!
It is indeed a glorious RED NOVEMBER!!!
Reporting from Ohio, where our loyal party leaders have been busy for weeks bending over backwards for ACORN. I was outraged to see that McKKKain was at the top of the ballot!!!! The One was like fifth on the ballot! Never mind they were listed in alphabetical order. I believe this is an apparent attempt by right wingers to make change hungry voters look hard for The One. If the ballots need to be in alphabetical order, shouldn't it be logical to put Obama first, because in his past life his last name began with a C(hrist).
Have discovered fine site paying homage to The One. Peace, Comrades!
Ah! My Fellow Enlighteneds! I am loath to report that in that Capitalist Pig Capital, St. Louis, Missouri's Western (spit!) suburbs, the masses have turned out to vote in droves. Eager to hang on to their ill-gotten filthy lucre, they have even bussed their mothers and fathers to be available for the head count. And, they're ALIVE!!! Never have I seen such selfishness! They should be busing their poor, oppressed, overworked, illegal immigrant maids and gardeners to vote! As the New Regime Dawns, the roles will be reversed. They should learn to respect the people for whom they will be working!
I ask them if they are not eager to hand over their hard work for the Beautification of Kenya, Iran, The Southern Region of The Phillipines, specifically General Santos and Zamoanga City, North Korea and other fine regimes of the coming Savior, and they indicated that they, who have put in long hours and years should be able to spend their money as they see fit, including charities.
One pig-dog, who had run for office in Missouri (spit!, that red state!) confided to me that many of his fellow poll answerers had admitted they LIED about their support to The One! I have since dispatched the Commisar to his town and all LIARS have been lined up to be shot.
I spit at them in their capitalist pig wallowing! I am ready to join the new regime. Where's my shovel?
My brave Georgia Comrades, now is not the time to rest. We must keep the pressure on. I have been patrolling my collective and making sure that certain miscreants are unable to attend their appointed polling place. Sometimes their tires were mysteriously flattened, or the local authorities made a visit to their appointed working area. Perhaps their names were somehow purged from the approved rolls. For the glory of the "One" and Joe the Biden.
We are on the brink of shutting the Iron curtin on Amerikkka! Just last week I went back to Keiv to dig up my Grand parents so they could cast thier vote for the Obomessiah. I never thought the day would come that we would over take the captialist pigs of this racest nation. Soon we will all be equaly worthless. Money will have no value. There will be no need to work harded than the man or woman next to you. Now I can die happy so that I may vote from the grave!
Here in the "swing" state of Kolorado, I knew something was amiss when I entered the voting booth. The names under the presidential column were scratched up, whited out, and corrected with a Sharpee. I was unsure how to cast my ballot. My choices were:
Da--Commander in Chief
and so forth. Were agents of The One busy during the night?
The Progressive Thought Police of Next TuesdayTM have been mobilized, Chairman, to ensure the liberty and right to vote of all who deserve to vote! We can now trust the integrity of the voting process this one last time that we will need it!
Glorious news from Colorado, polls show 52% of our comrades voted early and often! They say Co is a purple state right now, it will be purple once the nightsticks are properly applied! Our time is at hand comrades, I must go sharpen my shovel.
The Gallant Gallstone
You just elected me!
Obama is possessed, by me! Have a nice day!
All the best,
Sheik Abu Moham
Assalamu alaikum Comrades
Reporting from the Farthest Masque (Minnesota)
ALL IS AS PLANNED.
I am proud to report, I was within single digits at 7am and witnessed the proclamation of the polls opening.
I had a tingle in my leg knowing I would be among the first to usher in the new revolution.
ALL where festive.
Many speaking of the number of years they had attended this very event, at this very location. Retired academia no doubt. (I live on campus MSU). None the less, it is obvious they know far more than I. So I submit. The One will surely distribute their success equally.
Hello from the newly deklared republic of Virgina. Let the mandatory celebration begin.
Lenin 'n' Things
COMRADES! THE GLORIOUS REVOLUTION IS UPON US!
At long last, we have finally thrown off the bonds of experience, integrity, and accountability, and we have erected a new state for a new world! THE USSA WILL USHER IN A NEW AGE OF FREEDOM AND PROSPERITY, THROUGH CENSORSHIP AND REDISTRIBUTION! Finally, we are free to see people's union ballots, punish them accordingly, and slaughter the unborn to our heart's content!
Chairman M. S. Punchenko
Time to rebuild the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy -- this time ONLINE!
Are you kidding? Once the dear leader is in power, websites like this one will be banned for the greater good.
Natasha sans Boris
The dear leader has said that "change is coming." Hold on to your hats, and your wallets!
Such a historic moment! Now, please, enlightened Party Members, point me to some Kulaks so I may off them in celebration. With my shovel, of course, as Guns Are Bad.
Cradle to Grave Marxist
Though Japan is the land of the Rising Sun, AmeriKKKa is today the land of the Risen One.
AmeriKKKan comrades pondering travel abroad for pleasure, rush to Europe and Canada right now, for you have maybe 3 days before you are hated again. For foreign travel in general, you have until just after inauguration when your currency will soon be inflated to nothing, assuming anything remains after it's been "spread around."
I will celebrate the glorious, foretold victory of the Obamesiah by kayaking to the melting North Pole and save a polar bear or two. Reliable sources have told me that global temperatures have cooled several degrees just minutes after our Lord and master finished his victory speech.
I cannot wait to have my mind control chip finally activated so all my cares are taken over by the glorious USSA collective.
Dr. Idi Amin
I must warn my Enlightened here that one must be hypervigilant and on the constant watch for Infidels/Capitalist pigdogs/Imperialists/Americans/ in the coming years. Especially the next two.
We must always be alert of any discontent in the masses as the stream of "misunderstood" promises are changed "for the greater good". If any dissention, or any disagreement with which fluid policies and goals are dispensed, we must stamp it out.
For that forsaken land, The USA, still has elections on its books which elects new senators every two years and The Enemy might elect more Capitalist representation unless something is done now!
I will humbly submit to The One that, instead of The Enemy be allowed to vote, that members of his family, the Saudis, Iraqis (those left alive after the immediate retreat of Imperialism), North Koreans and other critics of The Enemy be allowed to dictate (ahem) advise him. Further elections should now be unnecessary.
The Proletariat has all the wisdom it needs and then can concentrate on working for the greater good.
S.A.F. Marshal Pravda
Comrade Red Square...
I have sent a crack team of my troops into the capital of the former US government and am proud to say that I have assumed control of the Ministry of Patriotism (formally known as the IRS, the Dept of Revenue et al). Yes, I call it a Ministry, for I will run it with compassion, not by those old, judgmental laws. I will also be watching out for who is showing the proper amount of patriotism. and we will be needing a lot of patriotic people to step forward. From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need... less a small percentage for Party costs of course.
Not to fret Comrade Red Square, I am sure I will be able to take care of many other jobs as well as the Ministry of Patriotism.
Would that be Minister of Patriotism and Taxation? Has a nice ring to it, sure to instill the fear of Stalin in those filthy wealth creators.
It's nice to see, Pupovich, that while everybody is distraught over the elections and trying to find their way in the changing reality, you continue steadily to promote your own career, benefits, connections, and rank. That's the Party spirit!
The Party will continue to be victorious for as long as it continues to attract such incorrigible patriots as Marshal Pupovich!
And what high level position do you hope to receive, comrade Red Square? Surely your work for the party will not go unnoticed?
Perhaps since Minister Goebbels is sadly unavailable you could take his position?
Comrade Red Square is the universal embodiment of The PartyTM and The RevolutionTM. He needs no position, fore he is all of them at once! He permeates everything and is everywhere yet nowhere! He is Rta!
I denounce you, thought criminal! Off to the gulag with you to await your fate in Comrade Vlad's BBQ Pits of Next TuesdayTM!