In epic Soviet fashion, Comrade Harry Reid today claimed that all nightmare stories we have been hearing are untrue and complete lies.

The success of the glorious program depends on positive reports, therefore all negative incidents will be purged.

An administration spokesman has stated that if you are experiencing any problems with DearLeaderCare you are delusional because it is all in your head.

Delusions are a covered condition under your new plan.

Until you are seen by a designated mental health operative in your area, the Party is issuing rose-colored glasses so you do not notice your high deductibles or incredibly long wait times.

Just remember to turn in all your guns on the way to your appointment because the mentally ill aren't allowed to own them.

Comrade Senator Harry Reid suggests that you have a toke and put on some rose-colored glasses...

It depends on how true the meaning of "true" is.

Harry Reid says to Americans, "Don't be fooled by Republicans' false lies attacking our true lies about ObamaCare." President Obama adds an ObamaCare corollary: "Even if you like the false lies about my true lies about ObamaCare, you can't keep 'em."


Yet some slack-jawed teabaggers will, no doubt, attempt some form of pseudo-scientific effort (such as the Principia Matematica Theory of Negative and Positive Relations) to claim their false lies are truth:

(+integer) x (-integer) = (-integer)
(-integer) x (-integer) = (+integer)

So, if "true" is positive and "false" is negative, then (-) x (-) = truth and (+) x (-) = bulls--t.

--KOOK

KOOK wrote:Yet some slack-jawed teabaggers will, no doubt, attempt some form of pseudo-scientific effort (such as the Principia Matematica Theory of Negative and Positive Relations) to claim their false lies are truth:

(-integer) x (+integer) = (-integer)
(-integer) x (-integer) = (+integer)

So, if "true" is positive and "false" is negative, then (-) x (-) = truth and (+) x (-) = bulls--t.

--KOOK

Comrade KOOK, as (more or less) pointed out above by Comrade Kitteh-In-Mail, it all depends on what the meaning of cosine is.

"I did not have math with that woman..."