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We're Doing Everything We Can To Save You Money On GAS!

3/12/2012, 10:55 pm
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AT OBAMAGAS, WE'RE DOING EVERYTHING WE CAN TO SAVE YOU MONEY ON GAS!*

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Yes, here at OBAMAGAS, WE CARE! We CARE about the high cost of fuel caused by the Bush Administration! And though our CARING should be ENOUGH, we realize that there are short-sighted people who might not think so, especially in an election year! So, we've developed a multi-point program GUARANTEED to help you out in these harsh economic times (which were brought about by the BUSH ADMINISTRATION.)

From now until November 6, anytime you pull into a participating OBAMAGAS retailer and complain about the pump prices, our happy, peppy unionized attendant will:

  • Tell you to make sure your tires are properly inflated
  • Suggest you buy a car that gets better fuel economy
  • Remind you of the current $7500 $10000 Tax Credits on Chevy Volts
  • Complain about Sarah Palin blocking Bullet Train construction in California
  • Give you a bunch of clippings of stories written by objective media journalists about how high gas prices are no big deal
  • Suggest carpooling
  • Remind you that Energy Sec'y Steven Chu doesn't even OWN a car! Are you sure YOU need one?
  • Demand you stop whining because Europe still pays TWICE as much as we do
  • Explain how greedy Wall Street speculators are the ones driving up the price
  • The KOCH BROTHERS! Betcha forgot about them, didn't ya?


At OBAMAGAS, we're making this SPECIAL EFFORT to make YOU shut up happy because WE CARE! And we want YOU to KNOW that we're COMMITTED to DOING EVERYTHING WE CAN TO SAVE YOU MONEY ON GAS!*

*Except anything which will actually matter, like drilling, which will piss off our base.
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3/12/2012, 11:20 pm
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3/13/2012, 11:47 am
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One more you can add to the list:

Explain the incredibly complex reasons why high gas prices during the Bush administration were directly caused by Bush, but high gas prices during the Obama administration are caused by speculators.
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3/13/2012, 12:12 pm
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dedhedvedev wrote:One more you can add to the list:

Explain the incredibly complex reasons why high gas prices during the Bush administration were directly caused by Bush, but high gas prices during the Obama administration are caused by speculators.

Good work, comrade! I have been authorized to inform you that if any vodka is left over after this week's Party conference, you will be allowed to view a bottle. From afar, of course.
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3/13/2012, 12:15 pm
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In solidarity with the new 5-Year Energy Saving Program, our Collective has decided to lay around the communal rec room and watch TV all day. No fuel used here!
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3/13/2012, 1:12 pm
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Apparatchik Unkulturny wrote:In solidarity with the new 5-Year Energy Saving Program, our Collective has decided to lay around the communal rec room and watch TV all day. No fuel used here!

Since when did we get a TV in the communal rec room? Do we have electricity there now?!!
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3/13/2012, 2:07 pm
If the peasants want cheap gas, let them eat beans and cabbage. If they don't like beans and/or cabbage, then let them eat cake!
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3/13/2012, 2:37 pm
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Posted elsewhere:

Here's a quick bedtime story to explain the common sense law of supply and demand:

Once upon a time there was a Commune that decided to make Pro Obama Socialist stickers.

Since they were the only ones making them, they could charge whatever they wanted for them because there was a limited supply of Pro Obama Socialist stickers in the land.

The Commune's cost per sticker were $1.00 each, but they charged $5.00 each and made a big profit.

But then another Commune also decided to get into the act with their very own Pro Obama Socialist stickers. Their costs were similar but they charged $4.00 each – and sold more Pro Obama Socialist stickers than the first Commune. [We'll call that #1 Commune]

#1 Commune responded charging $3.00 each, the second Commune [We'll call that #2 Commune] reduced their price to $2.00.. and so on. Until they reached a point where they could make a little profit and stay in business while still hawking their Pro Obama Socialist stickers.

A point of equilibrium was established whereby #1 & #2 Commune's made enough profit to reward them for staying in business while still being able make and sell Pro Obama Socialist stickers.

And of course, everyone lived happily ever after [at least until November 2012, that is]

The ‘Moral' of the story is that with more of a supply of Pro Obama Socialist stickers on the market, demand was met and it kept prices low and the Commune's still made a profit.

And for a smaller hit on your wallet, you can stick one of these on your Chevy Volt and proudly declare you're a POS…….

………………………………...until it catches on fire.
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3/14/2012, 1:16 pm
Critical race theory as taught by Obama is an advanced theory of society where whites live in Obama Inc solar powered mud huts thereby cutting the use of oil in the US and lowering the price of oil for the rest of the world.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Critical_race_theory
The biggest glitch so far is how to get the brains of the outfit out of prison.
https://charlesrowley.wordpress.com/201 ... agojevich/
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3/14/2012, 3:03 pm
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dedhedvedev wrote:Explain the incredibly complex reasons why high gas prices during the Bush administration were directly caused by Bush, but high gas prices during the Obama administration are caused by speculators.
*faceplant*

Comrade, that's easy: high gas prices during the Bush administration were directly caused by Bush because, Bush.

*shakes head*
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3/14/2012, 4:25 pm
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R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote: *faceplant*

Comrade, that's easy: high gas prices during the Bush administration were directly caused by Bush because, Bush.

*shakes head*
Enlightened progs will have no problem understanding your faultless logic, but how would you explain it to teabaggers, who are so pigheaded they insist on wasting precious fossil fuels going to work every day to earn money to buy the things they want, when they could just let Dear Leader provide what He, in His infinite wisdom, decides they really need.
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