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Joseph Stalin the 3rd to bring America into one United State

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We have received a transmission from a new emerging leader of the revolutionary movement - Joseph Stalin the 3rd - who has mandated that we publish his videotaped public address in our Party Organ. Having been made aware of the consequences of our refusal, we have complied.

See the official transcript below, followed by the video obtained via Laika the Space Dog's encrypted satellite connection.


Joseph Stalin the 3rd - Public Address # 2

Hello. This is your dear Comrade Joe Stalin the 3rd coming back at you like a pile of stale potatoes, from my office in the newly constructed Stalinization plant here in California.

I am hearing through my public interaction coordinator, Pulski Ianosev, that many proud people of United States have viewed my earlier speech about my dear friend Bernie with grand approval.

This is very good news. I was not certain that my good intentions would be so recognized. Based on this collective response, I have contracted with the top robo-calling agency in the world to generate many calls to remaining free thinkers to persuade them to join with us in the new People's Republic on United Democrats - or be crushed.

Do not take this too seriously as I have never crushed a child younger than 4 years, with my hands. This we save for the peoples' human re-purposing machine. It is quite nifty, with an automated canning station to generate more rations - for you, my dedicated workers!

In my last communication to the people, I describe for you what the future will hold with my new position in the United State of America. Today, I talk about the color red first. Yes, red is the color of children's blood. And also the color of the floor around the people's human re-purposing machine. But - hold in your hearts comrades, the color red is also a symbol of submission to collective thought.

The problem I'm having is that with all of these liberals in America so eternally focused on everything being green, there is little space left over for my grandfather's color of choice. For this reason, from now on, when I say Green, I am referring to Red. When you see the color green or think about the color green, you will see and think of the color red. This is very simple process and works to provide training in ignoring the truth - which is central to being a good communist.

O.K., let's do a test. "Green" I know what you are thinking - Small carbon footprint, recycling, ad - excuse me - propaganda campaigns. But you are wrong, all you should think when I say "green" is "Red." And do not worry, we are very good at recycling - dissenters - and our propaganda is world class

Let us try again - "Green" - That's better.

Now you are thinking - But what about Red. Is red now green? No! Red is red and Green is red. The actual color green is still green, but green is red and always will be. Am I making myself clear comrades?

Remember, you do not need to ask questions anymore. We will tell you everything you need to know. For instance, how many chickens can you fit into an 18 wheeler? Bernie Sanders. How many bales of wheat does it take to feed 5 families? Bernie Sanders. Bernie is the answer to everything! How is the weather comrade? Bernie Sanders. You get the point.

Green! ….. Ha, that was another test developed by my thought control group secretary - Boris Paczki. He's polish, but he does whatever I tell him to do so I keep him around, what can I say, loyalty is everything in communism and you, my new comrades, must begin to think in these terms. There are no other terms.

This leads me to my next topic. Have you ever drink from a Molotov cocktail? It gives you a very good buzz. Even better than someone else's vodka. When I was a young comrade I used to sit on my grandfather's knee and he would tell me story after story of torturing people, snatching his enemies out of their beds at night, convicting criminals in show trials - Aaahhh. But every once in a while, after I smoke one of his cigarettes, he would give me a sip right out of a Molotov cocktail. I cannot wait to share this with you my new comrades.

I have a joke for you: How many rations does it take to kill small child? - - None! Get it, because we don't have any rations. Ha ha ha, that's an old one.

How about this one: How long can a man work to lay bricks without stopping? - - Until he dies! Hah Hah Hah! I love that one.

I would like to end this groupthink session with a little bit of information about the new headquarters for the United State of America. You might know this as a capital. During the first Party Congress of the new Peoples' Republic of United Democrats it will be decided that the word "capital" no longer exists in our United State. Too many memories of freedom are associated with this word and it shall not be spoken again.

We will locate the PROUD headquarters in the only place that makes sense, right here in California. The first work project of the people will be the erection of the Great Wall of America. This will take many bricks and many lives, but think of it - no more Mexicans, no more taco trucks, no more anything other than complete tranquility and equality. For you, the great people.

Until next time, cheers.




 
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