Our great and beloved Leader, winner of one thousand battles against Kapitalism, a.k.a. Hugo Chavez, is missing.

We know that he is in Cuba, but the fact is: nobody knows what is in fact happening. A lot of rumors have been spread by the CIA, the Mossad, the MI-6, the NFL, the NBA, the AFL-CIO, the YMCA, the Pope and other fascist agencies about his whereabouts. A lot of whispering is taking place in Venezuela, the land of the zoozialism of the XXI Century.

We revolutionaries are strongly suspicious that a strange bacteria may have been planted in the blood of our beloved Leader by some fascist agents. What began as a simple and very original tour of Latin American popular democracies: Bolivia, Ecuador, Cuba, etc. etc. seemingly ended with the hospitalization in Havana of our re-born incarnation of Simon Bolivar.

A lot of speculation is going around... Let us revolutionaries chavistas unite ourselves in a "chain of prayers" (even if we are atheists...) for the good health of the bacteria!!! Let's remember our beloved Leader in happier times, when he visited the Father of the Revolution: Fidel Castro. Oh...oh... wait a minute: What the hell is that thing in Chavez's hands? Maybe this is the origin of the pelvic infection?

EMBEDDED IMAGE NO LONGER AVAILABLE

All those grooves can hide lots of stuff.

Maяxist sharing is a sacrificial form of LOVЭ.

I was shocked to see that photo! And filled with relief to see it wasn't Comrade Castro's . . . . . well, I was thinking it was . . . . it appeared to be his . . . never mind.

What were you say?? Who's gone where??