Good idea. It is high time.
Don't you think "the common defense" is a little old-fashioned, aggressive, scary, and frankly, offensive. How about, "world image", or perhaps, "world image and collective self-esteem"?
Great idea! May I suggest we drop the "perfect" in perfect union. That's setting the bar a little high, and in the event someone couldn't achieve this perfection, it may become a problem with the 'collective self-esteem'. I think we should Change[sup]tm[/sup] it to read a more 'equal' or perhaps 'fair' union.
Opiate of the People
Instead of "establish justice", the words should say "establish social justice". This term inherently meaningless thus rendering any interpretation of it potentially valid. Thus, it provides legal cover for anything the Party wishes to do; all that is required to empower ANY action of the state is a sufficiently simple-minded jurist, of which the Party has anointed plenty over the years (Sonia who?)
Take my word for this; the state of New Jerky (a.k.a the Peoples Republic of Corzania) years ago inserted into its constitution a guarantee of "a thorough and efficient education." This seemingly innocuous term has been used by a succession of progressive jurists to justify the expropriation of numerous taxpayer dollars to be poured down a multitude of educational ratholes in quest of that elusive goal or at least their personal vision of same.
This will be a progressive dream come true. Think of it: 100% marginal tax rates, draconian environmental regulations that will bring all economic activity to a halt and massive welfare bureaucracies can all be easily and legally brought about in the name of social justice! Oooh, Lenin and Stalin will want to rise up from their graves and be a part of this!
The silly outmoded Constitution is a living document that has outlived it usefulness.
Now that we've used democracy to get Dear Leader elected, we can take that old parchment to the shovel ready graveyard.
We The Government Ask That You Dock Monkeys Shut The Eff up Immediately!
Article 1 of 1
Grigori E.R.....start writing up your wish lists comrades.
I found some Progressive Wish Lists
™ on the Ad Infinitum search engine...
And here's mine based on this one
1 ) End All War!
Life Should Not Be WAR!!! War remains totally like, unpopular ya know, so like it's widely described as like destructive, destabilizing, unnecessary, and a failure and stuff. We should like resolve it with kool-aid and cookies and like sign for U.S. troops to withdraw NOW! U.S. imperialist involvement in war will like, not cease as quickly as some had like hoped and stuff, but the end is in sight, and like if it isn't we could like make Code Pink a National Organization to like Resolve All War.
2 ) Healthcare is a Right!!!
Healthcare NOW!!! We need like an overhaul of the nation’s health care system and stuff. The United States is like big and strong, and like one of the wealthiest, most industrialized nations in the like the whole entire world AND it's like the leader in per-capita health care spending, DUDE!!! We should like have the world’s best health care system, I mean like come on! But on like a whole bunch of like indicators, the U.S. health system falls short of those of like other industrialized nations. It's like a failure you know and stuff. The People are rising up and demanding some version of expanded or universal health care NOW!!!
3 ) Human Rights NOW!!!
We need like renewed respect for human rights and stuff. Key steps to demonstrate the concern of the U.S. for human rights include like the closure of the detention facility at Guantánamo Bay, an end to the use of evil water boarding TORTURE, and like a total rejection of the Military Commissions Act. Some call for like repealing the PATRIOT Act and FISA like altogether and stuff.
4 ) Stop Killing BABY SEALS!!!
We need to like focus on the environment. Three goals of the progressive website SaveOurEnvironment.org include like cutting oil use in half, obtaining 100% of electricity from clean sources, and reducing global warming by like 80%. While we are amphibious ambitious prog frogs, we can like work towards these goals at the domestic AND international levels and that will like put us on the right path to a like greener world of lillipads.
5 ) WPA NOW!!!
Invest in public infrastructure with tax dollars NOW!! The August 2007 collapse of the interstate bridge in Moonbat Minneapolis is only one example of the progressive consequences of allowing the nation’s infrastructure to crumble. Roads, highways, bridges, railroads, sewers, and drinking water systems need to be repaired, expanded, and brought up to standards NOW!!! This will improve mobility for The Handicapped™ and safety for The Children™ and while creating Peoples Jobs™.
6 ) Feminyst Revolution NOW!!!
Promote womyn’s rights to wallets NOW!!! The National Organization for Women is hoping that Obama will address the extremely devastating wage gap between men and women, protect Abortion Rights™, improve Access To Contraception™ in schools and for teens by letting like ALL 17 year old's get the morning after pill without consulting their kapitalist Doctor OR their bourgeoisie Parents, we can like force employers to offer like Paid Sick Days™ and Family Leave™, like allow women into combat military units like G.I. Jane because movies are real and stuff, and like establish a cabinet-level Office on Women like the White House Womyn's Council er something. A top priority is the passage of the Freedom of Choice Act which would overrule and force many state-level restrictions on abortion of the books. Because that's like the American way and stuff.
7 ) Stand Up For Gay Rights NOW!!!
Advancing gay rights is like way beyond securing Individual Rights. Important steps include outlawing workplace discrimination even if the place of employment is like a strip club Bruno should be allowed to dance there too!!! We need to like expanding hate-crime laws to include anti-gay violence and hatred against hamsters and gerbils. Obama has already slept with Larry what's his name so he's like stated his opposition to the military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy because Obama wants to like KNOW.
8 ) Amnesty NOW!!!
Protecting (I'm not going to say like that Rethuglican word "illegal") immigrant’s rights. Pro-Obama voting groups such as like Latinos want workplace raids targeting supposed "illegal-immigrant" workers stopped, curtailed or halted. Many hope for the passage of like comprehensive immigration reform that does not involve like evil Rethuglican mass deportation.
9 ) Therapy For Convicts NOW!!!
Criminal justice reform is like so important. Key points are like the elimination of the like sentencing disparity between like crack cocaine and powder cocaine, dude, and like the expansion of like alternatives to incarceration, and like the extension of voting rights to ex-convicts and stuff.
10 ) Free Drugs For All NOW!!!
Drug reform. Although like totally unlikely to be on the top of the agenda of like most "mainstream" like politicians, the legalization of marijuana made it into the like top-ten list on change.org (an independent and like totally progressive website unaffiliated with the Obama campaign, no really!). Marijuana law reform group NORML (because like everybody smokes pot dude!) argues that the legalization of marijuana would eliminate the black market for the drug, reducing crime, corruption, and violence and stuff. It would also help the U.S. climb down from its stupid position as the country with the highest like incarceration rate in the world! And stuff.
I propose to rename the archaic, oppressive "States" into "Communities." There can only be one State, and nothing outside of it should exist. And the glorious new name of such a state should be "United Communities of America."
As in every true people's democracy, each community will be represented by its organizers, who will sit on Capitol Hill in the House of Organizers and channel the People's Will by voting unanimously in support of Dear Leader.
My most wonderful, glorious, and enchanting Red Square it appears that I neglected to remind you of the conversation we had stating that "America" originates from a European man's name. At the time you wisely stated that this was racist, sexist, and euro-centric. You said that there is no Europe and no 'white' culture. All societies developed by 'men' (non-progressive types, of course) are inherently violent.
I am ashamed at my sloppy disregard for your wisdom and hope that you can forgive my lapse.
Il Duce Chupacabra
"I propose to rename the archaic, oppressive "States" into "Communities." There can only be one State, and nothing outside of it should exist. And the glorious new name of such a state should be "United Communities of America."
As in every true people's democracy, each community will be represented by its organizers, who will sit on Capitol Hill in the House of Organizers and channel the People's Will by voting unanimously in support of Dear Leader."
But Red Square, what about the hermits and farmers who are not part of glorious, equal, well-organized communities? How about "The Diverse Landmass of Fairness and universal agreement"?
I don't know about We the government, but I do know about We the Comrades. Here's My suggestion for that:
People Workers of the United Amerikan Socialist States, in order to form a more perfect the equal union, establish social justice, insure enforce domestic tranquility, provide for defund the common defense, promote the general propel everyone into welfare, and secure the blessings remove the greed and avarice of liberty to from ourselves and our posterity, do ordain slash and establish burn this Constitution Capitalist Manifesto for the of the former United States of America White Christian Empire
My fellow collectivists of the world, I hereby offer a draft of our glorious Constitution!
[center]Preamble[/center]We the Proletariats of the World, in Order to form a more perfect Egalitarian Union, establish Justice, guarantee domestic Tranquility, endow with common defense, necessitate general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Suppression to those of whom oppose Us and their Posterity, do command and establish this Constitution of the United Communitarian States.
[center]Article I[/center]Section 1. All unicameral legislative Powers herein shall be vested in the House of Comrades of the United Communitarian Empire.
Section 2. The House of Comrades shall be composed of Members chosen every second Year by the Proletariats of the World.
No bourgeoisie shall be a Comrade. No Proletariat shall be a Comrade who shall not have attained to the age of eighteen Years, and been five Years a Proletariat of the United Communitarian States.
Comrades and direct Taxes shall be demanded among the bourgeoisie which may be included within this Egalitarian State, according to their respective Numbers, which shall be determined by adding to the whole Number of Proletariats, including those bound to Service for a Term of Years, and excluding Proletariats not taxed, three fifths of all other individualists. The actual Enumeration shall be made within three Years after the first Meeting of the House of Comrades of the United Communitarian Empire, and within every subsequent Term of ten Years, in such Manner as they shall by commandment direct. The Number of Comrades shall not exceed one for every ten Thousand.
When vacancies happen in the Comradization, the Kremlin shall issue Election to fill such Vacancies.
The House of Comrades shall choose their Speaker and other Officers.
Section 3. The Times, Places and Manner of holding Elections for Comrades, shall be prescribed in each State by the Legislature thereof; but the House of Comrades may at any time by rule make or alter such Regulations.
The House of Comrades shall assemble at least once in every Year, and such Meeting shall be on the first Monday in December, unless they shall by decree appoint a different Day.
Section 4. Each House of Comrades shall be the Judge of the Elections, Returns and Qualifications of its own Members, and a Majority of each shall constitute a Quorum to do Business; but a smaller Number may adjourn from day to day, and may be authorized to compel the Attendance of absent Members, in such Manner, and under such Penalties.
House of Comrades may determine the Rules of its Proceedings, punish its Members for disorderly Behavior and treason against the United Communitarian States, and, with the Concurrence of two thirds, expel a Member, or put the Member to death.
The House of Comrades shall keep a Journal of its Proceedings, and from time to time publish the same, excepting such Parts as may in their Judgment require Secrecy; and the Yeas and Nays of the Members of the House of Comrades on any question shall, at the Desire of one fifth of those Present, be entered on the Journal.
Section 5. The Comrades shall receive a Compensation for their Services from all bourgeoisie, to be ascertained by Demand, increase at the Comrades whim, and paid out of the Central Bank of the United Communitarian States. They shall in all Cases, except Treason, Felony and Breach of the Peace, be privileged from Arrest during their Attendance at the Session of their respective Houses, and in going to and returning from the same; and for any Speech or Debate in either House, they shall not be questioned in any other Place.
Section 6. All Demands for raising Revenue from the bourgeoisie shall be command by the House of Comrades.
Every Demand which shall have passed the House of Comrades, shall, before it become a Demand, be presented to the Kremlin of the United Communitarian States; if the Kremlin approve, the Kremlin shall sign it, but if not the Kremlin shall return it, with the Kremlin’s Objections to the House of Comrades, who shall enter the Objections at large on their Journal, and proceed to reconsider it. If after such Reconsideration one tenth of the Comrades shall agree to pass the Demand, and if so it shall become a Demand. But in all such Cases the Votes of the Comrades shall be determined by Yeas and Nays, and the Names of the Proletariats voting for and against the Demand shall be entered on the Journal of House of Comrades. If any Demand shall not be returned by the Kremlin within two Days after it shall have been presented to the Kremlin, the Same shall be a Demand, in like Manner as if the Kremlin had signed it, unless the House of Comrades by their Adjournment prevent its Return, in which Case it shall not be a Demand.
Every Order, Resolution, or Vote to which the Concurrence of the House of Comrades may be necessary shall be presented to the Kremlin of the United Communitarian States; and before the Same shall take Effect, shall be approved by the Kremlin, or being disapproved by the Kremlin, shall be repassed by one tenth of the House of Comrades, according to the Rules and Limitations prescribed in the Case of a Bill.
Section 8. The House of Comrades shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes on all bourgeoisie and any dissenters, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United Communitarian States; but all Taxes shall be uniform throughout the United Communitarian States;
To create fiat Money and credit of the United Communitarian States;
To regulate the Commerce of the bourgeoisie, and among the States;
To coin Money, regulate the Value thereof, and fix the Standard of Weights and Measures;
To provide for the Punishment of counterfeiting the Securities and current Coin of the United Communitarian States;
To promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts, by securing for limited Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings and Discoveries;
To define and punish Piracies and Felonies committed on the high Seas, and Offences against the United Communitarian States;
To declare War, grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal, and make Rules concerning Captures on Land and Water against those of whom oppose the United Communitarian States;
To raise and support Armies at whim;
To provide and maintain a Navy;
To make Rules for the Government and Regulation of the land and naval Forces;
To provide for calling forth the bourgeoisie to execute the Laws of the United Communitarian States, suppress Insurrections and repel Invasions;
To abolish of private property and the application of all rents of land to public purposes;
To provide a heavy progressive or graduated income tax on the bourgeoisie;
To abolish of all rights of inheritance;
To confiscation of the property of all emigrants, bourgeoisie, dissenters, and rebels of any kind;
To create centralization of credit in the hands of the United Communitarian States, by means of a national bank with United Communitarian States capital and an exclusive monopoly;
To extend of factories and instruments of production owned by the United Communitarian States, the bringing into cultivation of waste lands, and the improvement of the soil generally in accordance with a common plan;
To create Equal liability of all to labor, Establishment of industrial armies, especially for agriculture;
To combine of agriculture with manufacturing industries, gradual abolition of the distinction between town and country, by a more equitable distribution of population over the country;
To have free education for all children in public concentration schools, Abolition of children's factory labor from the bourgeoisie, and Combination of education with industrial production;
To exercise exclusive Legislation in all Cases whatsoever, over such District (not exceeding ten Miles square) as may, by Cession of particular States, and the Acceptance of Congress, become the Seat of the Government of the United Communitarian States, and to exercise like Authority over all Places purchased by the Consent of the Legislature of the State in which the Same shall be, for the Erection of Forts, Magazines, Arsenals, dock-Yards, and other needful Buildings;--And
To make all Demands which shall be necessary and proper for carrying into Execution the foregoing Powers, and all other Powers vested by this Constitution in the Government of the United Communitarian States, or in any Department or Officer thereof.
Section 9. The Privilege of the Writ of Habeas Corpus shall be suspended to bourgeoisie.
Bill of Attainder or ex post facto Demands shall be passed on the bourgeoisie.
Capitation, or other direct, Tax shall be laid on the bourgeoisie.
Tax or Duty shall be laid on Articles exported from any State within the United Communitarian States.
Money shall be drawn from the Treasury, but in Consequence of Appropriations made by Demand; and a regular Statement and Account of Receipts and Expenditures of all public Money shall be published from time to time.
Section 10. Each State shall pass any Bill of Attainder and ex post facto Demand the bourgeoisie, or Demand impairing the Obligation of Contracts.
Each State shall, lay and collect any Taxes on the bourgeoisie.
[center]Article II[/center]Section 1. The executive Power shall be vested in a Kremlin of the United Communitarian States. The Kremlin shall hold Office during the Term of four Years, and, together with the Vice Kremlin, chosen for the same Term, be elected by the Proletariats of the World.
No bourgeoisie shall be Kremlin. No Proletariat except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United Communitarian States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of Kremlin; neither shall any Proletariat be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of eighteen Years, and been ten Years a Inhabitant within the United Communitarian States.
In Case of the Removal of the Kremlin from Office, or of Death, Resignation, or Inability to discharge the Powers and Duties of the said Office, the Same shall devolve on the Vice Kremlin, and the House of Comrades may by Demand provide for the Case of Removal, Death, Resignation or Inability, both of the Kremlin and Vice Kremlin, declaring what Officer shall then act as Kremlin, and such Officer shall act accordingly, until the Disability be removed, or a Kremlin shall be elected by the Proletariats.
The Kremlin shall, at stated Times, receive for Services, a Compensation, which shall increased and never diminished during the Period for which the Kremlin shall have been elected.
Before the Kremlin enter on the Execution of said Office, the Kremlin shall take the following Oath or Affirmation: "I do seriously avow that I will faithfully execute the Office of Kremlin of the United Communitarian States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Proletariats, Constitution of the United Communitarian States, and oust any dissenter or bourgeoisie whom shall get out of line."
Section 2. The Kremlin shall be Commander in Chief of the Army and Navy of the United Communitarian States; the Kremlin may require the Opinion, in writing, of the principal Officer in each of the executive Departments, upon any Subject relating to the Duties of their respective Offices, and the Kremlin shall have Power to grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offences against the United Communitarian States, except bourgeoisie and dissenters.
The Kremlin shall have Power to fill up all Vacancies that may happen during the Recess of the Comrades, by granting Commissions which shall expire at the End of their next Session.
Section 3. The Kremlin shall from time to time give to the House of Comrades Information of the State of the Egalitarian Union, and recommend to their Consideration such Measures as he shall judge necessary and expedient; the Kremlin may, on extraordinary Occasions, convene the House of Comrades, and in Case of Disagreement, with Respect to the Time of Adjournment, the Kremlin may adjourn them to such Time as the Kremlin shall think proper; the Kremlin shall receive Ambassadors and other public Ministers; the Kremlin shall take Care that the Demands be faithfully executed, and shall Commission all the Officers of the United Communitarian States.
[center]Article III[/center]Section 1. The judicial Power of the United Communitarian States, shall be vested in one supreme Court. The Judges of the supreme Court, shall hold their Offices during good Behavior, and shall, at stated Times, receive for their Services, a Compensation, which shall increase and never diminished during their Continuance in Office.
Section 2. The judicial Power shall extend to all Cases, arising under this Constitution, the Demand of the United Communitarian States; to Controversies to which the United Communitarian States shall be a Party; to Controversies between two or more States; between a State and Proletariats of another State; between Proletariats of different States;--between Proletariats of the same State claiming Lands under Grants of different States, and between a State, or the Proletariats thereof, Proletariats, bourgeoisie, or dissenters.
The Trial of all Crimes, except in Cases of Impeachment, shall be by Jury of Proletariats; and such Trial shall be held in the State where the said Crimes shall have been committed; but when not committed within any State, the Trial shall be at such Place or Places as the House of Comrades may by Demand have directed.
Section 3. Treason against the United Communitarian States, and collectivist ideals shall be death.
[center]Article IV[/center]Section 1. Full Faith and Credit shall be given in each State to the public Acts, Records, and judicial Proceedings of every other State. And the House of Comrades may by general Demands prescribe the Manner in which such Acts, Records, and Proceedings shall be proved, and the Effect thereof.
Section 2. The Proletariats of each State shall be entitled to all Privileges and Immunities of Proletariats in the several States.
A bourgeoisie charged in any State with Treason, Felony, or other Crime, who shall flee from Justice, and be found in another State, shall on Demand of the executive Authority of the State from which he fled, be delivered up, to be removed to the State having Jurisdiction of the Crime.
Section 3. New States may be admitted by the House of Comrades into this Egalitarian Union; but no new States shall be formed or erected within the Jurisdiction of any other State; nor any State be formed by the Junction of two or more States, or Parts of States, without the Consent of the Legislatures of the States concerned as well as of the House of Comrades.
The House of Comrades shall have Power to dispose of and make all needful Rules and Regulations respecting the Territory or other Property belonging to the United Communitarian States.
Section 4. The United Communitarian States shall guarantee to every State in this Egalitarian Union a Collectivist Form of Government, and shall protect each of them against Invasion.
[center]Article V[/center]The House of Comrades, whenever two thirds shall deem it necessary, shall propose Amendments to this Constitution, or, on the Application of the Legislatures of two thirds of the States, shall call a Convention for proposing Amendments, which, in either Case, shall be valid to all Intents and Purposes, as Part of this Constitution, when ratified by the Legislatures of two thirds of the States, or by Conventions in two thirds thereof, as the one or the other Mode of Ratification may be proposed by the Congress; and that no State, without its Consent, shall be deprived of its equal Suffrage in the House of Comrades.
[center]Article VI[/center]This Constitution, and the Demands of the United Communitarian States which shall be made in Pursuance thereof, shall be the supreme Demands of the Land; and the Judges in every State shall be bound thereby, any Thing in the Constitution or Demands of any State to the Contrary notwithstanding.
[center]Article VII[/center]House of Comrades shall outlaw religion, and exercise thereof; abridge speech, and press; and ban bourgeoisie and dissenters to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
[center]Article VIII[/center]House of Comrades shall regulate or ban Arms at whim.
[center]Article IX[/center]Soldiers or any government agent shall, in time of peace or war, be quartered in any bourgeoisie house.
[center]Article X[/center]The bourgeoisie and dissenter shall have no right to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, unreasonable searches and seizures, shall be violated, and Warrants shall issue, no probable cause, no support by Oath or affirmation, and do not have to describe the place to be searched, and the bourgeoisie or dissenter or things to be seized.
[center]Article XI[/center]Bourgeoisie and dissenters shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, shall be subject for the same offence of life or limb; shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, may be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of Demand; shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.
[center]Article XII[/center]In all criminal prosecutions, the bourgeoisie and dissenters shall not have the right to a speedy and public trial, shall not have an impartial jury of the State and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by Demand, and not to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; shall not be confronted with the witnesses against him or her; and shall not have witnesses in his or her favor, and shall not have the Assistance of Counsel for his or her defense.
[center]Article XIII[/center]Excessive bail shall be required against the bourgeoisie and dissenters, excessive fines imposed, cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.
[center]Article XIV[/center]The enumeration in the Constitution, of collectivist rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the Proletariats.
[center]Article XV[/center]The powers not delegated to the United Communitarian States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the Proletariats.
What do you think? Any suggestions, concerns? Let us work collectively on our Constitution!
My Name Is Top Secret
A rather impressive revision. However, I believe that only the revised introduction should be released to the public. This will allow us to alter the konstituton at our leisure. As I only skimmed, I did not notice whether or not there was a clause stating something to the effect of "This document in no way limits or restricts the power of government. Government is not required to abide by any decrees set forth by itself unless it wants to." Perhaps that should be an amendment under the bill of regulations. Perhaps it would also be appropriate to state that any unlisted rights are NOT NECESSARILY still rights, and any unlisted rights that actually are rights belong solely to the government to be distributed as necessary. Oh, and the income tax amendment stays as is. There should be about 123984798237 amendments, most of which will remain unwritten but may still be used in a court of law or quoted in speeches.
My Name Is Top Secret
oh, i must also mention that I saw the word "states." Do you wish to disrupt our glorious community structure with such a hideous remnant of (it pains me to even use the word) freedom!?!?!?! I will assume this was a mere "type-O" for now, only meriting a small detention in the northern wastelands.