"Start Warning the Jews" - Sing Along With Ahmadinejad


![]() | Few of us realize that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is an avid singer and has been secretly practicing karaoke in an padded bunker underneath Tehran's political prison, sometimes having inmates serve as captive audience. He dresses them up as American tourists, steps into the spotlight with a mic, closes his eyes, and imagines himself singing on Broadway as the guards quietly pistol-whip the inmates to ensure continuous applause and standing ovations. Upon hearing his rendition of the Great |
New York, New York Start warning the Jews I'm leaving today I want to jihadi it, New York, New York These murder's shoes Are longing to stray And make a laughable farce of it New York, New York I want to bullshit the city that never sleeps To find I'm king of the chumps, top of the creeps These Tehran blues Are melting away I'll make a brand new start of it In old New York If I can fake it there I'll fake it anywhere It's up to you, New York, New York I want to fake it in the city that's hole is deep To find I'm king of the chumps, top of the creeps These Tehran blues Are melting away I'll make a brand new farce of it In old New York If I can fake it there I'll fake it anywhere It's up to you, New York, New York |
In order to get into character, Iranian President has been practicing his skills in peace and progress for months, by capturing and releasing thought criminals, some of whom are U.S. citizens.
Another reason for his visit is his unstoppable desire personally to contribute more peace and progress to the United Nations, an international body that seems to be already so filled with peace and progress that yet another helping might just cause a spontaneous combustion. Area residents are concerned that yet another progressive self-combustion may occur at Columbia University where Ahmadinejad had been invited as a guest speaker. When asked about the danger of excessive peace and progress, Iranian president retorted with an old Iranian saying, "It's like chicken soup: it may not help but it won't kill you."
Iran's President is then expected to head to Venezuela for a meeting with his peaceful and progressive ally, President Hugo Chavez - an event which media analysts predict will trigger a sharp increase of peace and progress in the known universe.
See also Twelfth Imam is Coming to Town in People's Karaoke!
"Sing Along With Ahmadinejad" series are brought to you by the International Council For Peace, Progress, and the Destruction of Israel.



Aaaawwwwwwww... isn't that special....
-Mikhail







Mikhail T. Kalashnikov

Aaaawwwwwwww... isn't that special....
-Mikhail
perhaps later they will give each other a "special" massage using some of their oil.


<shudders>




Comrade Blogunov
Comrades! We must not let this progressive brother go unrewarded! Surely Columbia will offer him an honorary PhD in Peace Studies or something like that. What would be a fitting award from the Cube to recognize the accomplishments of this champion of the martyred proletariat who stands boldly against the Zionist Conspiracy, the Busheoisie, and the Cheney Oiligarchy?Comrade Blogunov,I envision the awarding of the Order of Hillary. The ceremony would be performed in Hollywood, with all the great stars in attendance. Comrade Clooney can be the master of ceremonies. A teary-eyed Dan Rather can present a special documentary on the life of the great progressive brother. All progressive TV stations worldwide will cover the event. The award will be presented by the Goracle himself, who will issue a formal apology on behalf of the West for all the suffering we have inflicted on the poor, seething masses of the Middle East.




Comrade Pupovich is indeed correct in the matter, my friends. Belief in a "god" is unbearably unacceptable, unless such god is the Party.
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By the way, Comrade Pupovich, a rather out-of-topic question from a fan of your avatar image: How do you keep your fur so smooth and shiny? My hair keeps "upwards" like this since way before I was tasered!
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I am particularly pleased with the suggestion that Imageniedad be given an honorary doctorate from Columbia University. There is nothing that garners more respect from the truly progressive denizens of academe than a degree for which the recipient never studied, never researched, never wrote, never even went to a class. It demonstrates the true message of socialism, that we are all indeed equal. It shows that what is important is not knowledge, but the proper attitude. The ability to spout insane vitriol against the Rethuglicans and all they stand for with absolute sincerity and moral certitude is what it takes, not rational thought.
I say welcome-welcome, mentor of the people Ahmadejaylad!
And LEAVE BRITTANY ALONE!






Party Diplomat Ivan Drago
By the way, Comrade Pupovich, a rather out-of-topic question from a fan of your avatar image: How do you keep your fur so smooth and shiny? My hair keeps "upwards" like this since way before I was tasered!Why thank you comrade Drago, I can see why the Party chose you for the diplomatic corps. Needless to say there are multiple reasons for the Pup's smooth and shiney fur. Believe it or not, the most important factor is a good diet of cat beasts. I also find that rolling in, shall we say, good organic conditioners several times a week helps to maintain that look. Never forget the good that comes from sniffing some tails now and then for obvious reasons, plus it generally leads to some healthy, vitamin rich "puppy oil" being returned to your facial areas from the sniffee.




I'll just scribble them down before going to bed... "eat cats"... "roll in organic matter thrice a week"... hey!... that was our basic freedom fighter training in North Vietnam!!! (Except for the "sniffing tails" part, which was left for the imperialist American soldiers, who had brought dollars...)
That is plain genius, comrade Pupovich, to discover additional benefits from the People's asian guerrilla guide. Please allow me the honor of someday signing a Drago autograph for your puppies.




LoneRedStar
Yeah we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill),we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill) men.Y-you mean...Ahmahdinedjad is...Captain Kirk????


Ivan Betinov
Emergency call to Sister Massively Opiated: Please dispatch a level three cleaning squad to my location immediately. I find I need a good brain washing...make that a brain scrubbing...following Comrade Commissar Pupovich's description of "puppy oil." Hurry. Please. Send bleach.Er, perhaps the Pup should have been more specific when he mentioned the valuable, healthy, packed full of vitamins and minerals, "puppy oil." This is what I meant, and who doesn't like getting their daily dose?



Commissar Pupovich
I can see you are going to go far in the Party comrade. I know this as much to my surprise, I discovered I had a real talent for kissing up which along with perhaps some small ability for denouncing, helped me to be promoted to being a commissar. Not that I think you were kissing up, I can see you have a real appreciation for the finer arts of proper canine training.Of course I appreciate them. Proper canine training is what makes efficient men of war (oh, cold war, those were the days...). About my likely talent for kissing up, well, I thank the Party for it (as for all else, of course): after two decades in Siberian workshops of Anger Management and Sublety, even a slab of concrete would develop some.
Alas, for the denouncing abilities, say... one never knows until the time comes to use them, right Comrade?




This actually serves as an object lesson in the fine art of denouncing. Had you been a henchman of the evil jooishnazihaliburtonchimpymchitler fascists I would have lost no time in loudly proclaiming and denouncing any number of perversions, real or imagined, that might be drawn from my misunderstanding of your statement, even moreso if it had been a willful misunderstanding on my part. Once you had explained the true nature of your statement I would have accused you of trying to re-write the past, of trying to deceive the people with smoke and mirrors, of trying to promote the destruction of family values and morality, of trying to brainwash the children. Oh the children! Won't somebody think of the children?! !!!11!???
As it is, knowing you to be a properly progressive party member I can calmly accept your clarification. Hell, even if you had been out rendering puppies for oil and then rolling in it while singing obscene songs involving baboons and latex, all would be rationalized, ignored and simply blamed on Bush for forcing you into such a position in the first place.
Remember comrades: words like "responsibility," "lack of integrity," "accountability," and "immorality" only apply to class enemies. Party members are by their very embrace of the True Light of Maxism-Leninism embued with automatic virtue in all actions, for we act for the Greater Good!


Is it not great that we serve in the Party, and by extension, For The People™ that we do? No longer bound by such useless relics of the past such as "responsibility," "lack of integrity," "accountability," and "immorality?"
BTW, I have been meaning to ask. I assume that is only the most fine vodka available to a Party member that your brain is being kept in? It is a most handsome brain I might add.


Long Linky Thing
TEHRAN, Iran — Threats and economic sanctions will not stop Iran's technological progress, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad warned Saturday at a large parade featuring fighter jets and radar-avoiding missiles designed to show off the country's military might.
"Those (countries) who assume that decaying methods such as psychological war, political propaganda and the so-called economic sanctions would work and prevent Iran's fast drive toward progress are mistaken," Ahmadinejad said at the parade.
Oh, but he left out the fact that brute military force may work....


Commissar Pupovich
Now wait a minute comrades... lets not get ahead of ourselves. I haven't heard of even a single Rial that he has donated to the campaign. Nor let us forget that despite several admirable qualities and abilities Ahmadinejad has shown, he still enforces many anti-progressive laws such as forcing their wimmin to dress like lamp shades (no doubt the worst of his flaws, discriminating against gays, drug users, porn, beastiality, necrophillia, appliance love, and his beliefs in a "god." I certainly cannot see him as earning an Order of Hillary. Perhaps a pat on the back maybe.The flaws you address here, enlightened commissar, would be fatal to a Busheois Repugnantcan. While we smirk at his unenlightened theism, we must bear in mind that it is fundamentally hostile to Christian theism. This makes him the enemy of such opiating fiends as Falwell and Dobson. Of course, my enemy’s enemy is my comrade. Also, the treatment of womyn in Iran is irrelevant because it is part of their indigenous sacred culture, and we dare not offend by imposing decadent western values, such as vile Christian based protective notions of respect of womyn, on them. Remember what they taught us at the Karl Marx Treatment Center and state universities: America is the only dysfunctional “culture”; all cultures that hate America, regardless of how they oppress and murder their own, are progressive and enlightened. Therefore, Achdelieberninjadude is progressive and enlightened even if he isn’t. Also, did you notice his shiny hair?
Needless to say, awards don’t have to be earned in our system. You just have to know the right people. For example, you will remember that I am a three time recipient of the Hero of Cubist Labor, and I haven’t done a blessed thing! I agree that he may not have attained yet to the Order of Hillary, so perhaps we could award him the Barak Crescent (also called the Order of Obama) once comrades Sharpton and Jackson have determined the degree of Achheneedsanosejob’s blackness.
Welcome, Comrade Drago! With your skills and background, I believe you would make a good interrogator/counselor at one of our Karl Marx Treatment Centers or state universities, especially for stubborn cases that resist reeducation.


Commissar Pupovich
This will surely put the fear of Allah into the infidels! Oh wait, I am an infidel. But hey, it does fly....Long Linky Thing
BTW, it looks like an F-5 with a new tail job. Hopefully, the modified parts were made in China.




Comrade Blogunov
Therefore, Achdelieberninjadude is progressive and enlightened even if he isn’t. Also, did you notice his shiny hair?Now I did not denounce him, no, I just feel that some are too quick to award him, regardless as to whether he has earned it or not as you stated correctly. But I would also note that applies primarily to the party. The only reason I can think of right off the top of my head to award a prole for no good reason for instance, would be to cause confusion in their thinking and discord among those that did not receive such. Needless to say, we normally do not go around giving awards to common proles for no reason, even though they too have their usefulness toward the state. I am sure if I am in error on this, someone will quickly correct me. I just see no value to the party to award him when he is being useful to the party as it is, any more than we award maggots for devouring those non-persons who no longer consume oxygen.
Do not forget, that while Abominaljihadibob or whatever his name is, has access to all the rials one could ask for, and yet, to my knowledge, has not made even a single contribution to the Many Titted Empress. Lets face it, all that useful idiot needs to continue his work is to give him favorable headlines.


Comrade Blogunov
BTW, it looks like an F-5 with a new tail job. Hopefully, the modified parts were made in China.That is what I thought as well, actually, it looked a lot like some training jets. As much as we could hope for them being effective, we must face facts at times. I suspect the warmongering USAF would achieve complete air superiority over the airspace over Iran in about 15 minutes....depending on how fast the Iranian "fighters" could land or cross the border into the closest friendly country.


Ukmeenisablojob will surley be welcomed by a burkad Hillary and perhaps she can cover those big ankles as well. We must elect Hillary as she along with our dems in the Senate and Congress will promote our cause algorithmically. [/i][/b]


Comrade Blogunov
Welcome, Comrade Drago! With your skills and background, I believe you would make a good interrogator/counselor at one of our Karl Marx Treatment Centers or state universities, especially for stubborn cases that resist reeducation.Why, thank you Comrade Blogunov! That's what I usually say: whenever needed, the will of the People must be enforced with compassion and understanding. (This here is compassion, and this is understanding.)
Commissar Pupovich
But as Commissar of Eco-Prostitution and Mental Health, I can certainly give a soldier such as your self a discount weekend pass to your local Party Pleasure Palace. *Pup busily calculating how much to raise the "regular" price so as to keep his...er... the Party's cut the same after the "discount."*Hurrah! Finally I'll be able to apply the "sniffing tails" part of the method. Maybe that will allow my hair down at last.
----
Quick report:
Embassy insiders from Asthmasneezerbrat's office sent me grim news, comrades. Fighter jets discovered by Comrade Pupovich were designed as political publicity stunts, and are unfortunately no threat for warmongering Amerikkkans. Blueprints describe models made of painted cardboard that move around powered by hidden camels-in-looping-hamster-wheels -- so-called C.i.L.Whe. technology, as I've heard (sounds like "Sea-weed" or something). It only flies for the cameras, with ropes.


Comrad Bubalasky
Ukmeenisablojob will surley be welcomed by a burkad Hillary and perhaps she can cover those big ankles as well. We must elect Hillary as she along with our dems in the Senate and Congress will promote our cause algorithmically. [/i][/b]Hmmm, while putting the Hillary in a Burqa to meet Awhogivesajihadibob would no doubt be a relief for sore eyes, where would one get so much material that would be tear resistant to her hooved feet?
No! This is not right! Not right at all! On Comrade Bubalasky, were it not that the Many Titted Empress does not notice such small fry like we, there would be Hill to pay if she did.


Hakmylungintoajar will soon be the sudo midget that is needed to replace the last leader the evil Americans financed. If it were not for the middle east the news would have nothing but Vodka driven young stars and OJ.
Do you have fleas?


Comrad Bubalasky
Ahh, Commissar Pupovich, it seems the puppy oil is fogging your thoughts. I suggest not speaking ill of the hooved one for fear of retribution, let us not forget Mr. Foster.Do you have fleas?
Oh, the Many Titted Empress is far too busy to take much notice of one such as I.
But does the Pup have fleas? I am astounded that a mere prole would suggest such a thing! No, the Pup uses protection!




"No, it's not for my head. It's for my ears."


I thank you for the compliment...I sometimes use a curling iron to get the loops and whorls just so, but most of the time I just give it a shake and go on. As to the jar solution, I started out with Vodka, but after meeting some very progressive Labourites from north of Hadrian's Wall, I generally swim in a delightful water of life known as Longmorn.






The Tsarevna
LoneRedStar
Yeah we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill),we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill) men.Y-you mean...Ahmahdinedjad is...Captain Kirk????
Impressive Comrade you got the reference! You are truly worthy of a party Tribble


Ivan Betinov
In the days of my youth on the Collective Farm I knew and appreciated bourbon whiskeys on a basis so regular that it defied imagination and supported entire peasant economies.Ah, I am somewhat familiar with this situation, I did not drink for about 9 years or so, never really took count, but I now drink a wee bit of wine now and then. But I too was once famous for my capacity to incompacitate myself.






Apologies for my belated entry to this forum. News takes longer once it passes the southern hemisphere. I blame global warming (pbuAGore).
You should all think yourselves privileged that the ultra progressive leader AhmanIcantgetajob is gracing the decadent United States with his aura. Think how we feel here down under. We haven't had anyone to help us reach new depths of self-loathing and guilt since Germaine Greer.
Sure, AhwomenIdidntjab's gay-hating policies certainly strike an uncomfortable g-spot with me. However one must unconditionally admire his Jew-hati....er, anti-Zionist policies as pure revolution.
Now that I think of it, we desperately need someone of Ahmyinnerjihad's character and resolve in 'Stray-ya. Not even the new Mufti, for all his brilliant deception, has dared challenge the 'Stray-yan Jewish pigulation with even the smallest anti-semetic rant. Piss-weak.
I must go now to formulate new population control policies
Yours
Beez




After a week of being banned by MSN from any ActiveX activity I can view this thread.
Each time I would open this, Windows would shut it down and send an error message.
Maybe I'm not getting the MSN signal?




Commissar Pupovich
Comrade Beezelbob, from what I understand from the news, your leaders have also shown a most non progressive intolerance of peace loving muslims who only seek to live under sharia law and all the benefits that come from this?Komrad Pup (or "Puppo" as you would be called Down Udder) you may be right. The outgoing Mufti Imam once called on our soon-to-be-ex-Prime Minister John Howitzer (spit!!!) to convert to Islam. He responded with "No thanks, I'm quite happy with Christianity". How offensive!!
Even worse, our progressive, freedom-loving Moozlem friends once demanded (rightly I say) that the Proime Misser "cease listing Hezbollah and Hamas as terrorist organisations". His response was "Fat chance. No way".
Offended again!! Still, us Greens thrive on offence.
Or was there a particular news item you were referring to Komrade Puppo? (Sorry, I've been oblivious to the news lately. My evil kapitalist alter-ego has been busy with his full time job and other bourgeois pursuits and has paid no attention to the affairs of state).
Thanks for asking. I love talking to animals
Beez


I am glad you like talking to the animals.... I have always wanted to ask, how is it ya' don't fall off the globe living down under?


Commissar Pupovich
I am glad you like talking to the animals.... I have always wanted to ask, how is it ya' don't fall off the globe living down under?I never thought I'd say this but global warming (pbuAGore) has obviously got something to do with it. Higher air pressure I think. How would I know? I can't possibly stay aligned to Party values if I had scientific knowledge of my own.
Sorry for the rant...I'm tired an need to go to bed. The clocks here are upside down also!
Beez


Quote:
Banned from any ActiveX activity? Never heard of such. Have you let the Chairman install his Meowism 4.72 program? It hasn't been tested as well as it should before release. I understand that there have been a large number of party computers infected by a "sleeper" worm to monitor your onlin.....ity....ega ds....what the %*)&@_! is going on with my....Hmmm.... first the vanishing Future Sun People Commissar from the MSN link on the other thread....no response from Sea-Bass..... maybe we're under attack from MSN!




SNL IRAN Digital Short September 29 2007


Red Square
SNL IRAN Digital Short September 29 2007
Komrades, it appears the progressive Youtube has censored Komrade Red's contribution obviously due to some breach of Party-approved media standard.
Now I really want to see it.
BB

