| Few of us realize that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is an avid singer and has been secretly practicing karaoke in an padded bunker underneath Tehran's political prison, sometimes having inmates serve as captive audience. He dresses them up as American tourists, steps into the spotlight with a mic, closes his eyes, and imagines himself singing on Broadway as the guards quietly pistol-whip the inmates to ensure continuous applause and standing ovations. Upon hearing his rendition of the Great |
|
New York, New York Start warning the Jews I'm leaving today I want to jihadi it, New York, New York These murder's shoes Are longing to stray And make a laughable farce of it New York, New York I want to bullshit the city that never sleeps To find I'm king of the chumps, top of the creeps These Tehran blues Are melting away I'll make a brand new start of it In old New York If I can fake it there I'll fake it anywhere It's up to you, New York, New York I want to fake it in the city that's hole is deep To find I'm king of the chumps, top of the creeps These Tehran blues Are melting away I'll make a brand new farce of it In old New York If I can fake it there I'll fake it anywhere It's up to you, New York, New York |
In order to get into character, Iranian President has been practicing his skills in peace and progress for months, by capturing and releasing thought criminals, some of whom are U.S. citizens.
Another reason for his visit is his unstoppable desire personally to contribute more peace and progress to the United Nations, an international body that seems to be already so filled with peace and progress that yet another helping might just cause a spontaneous combustion. Area residents are concerned that yet another progressive self-combustion may occur at Columbia University where Ahmadinejad had been invited as a guest speaker. When asked about the danger of excessive peace and progress, Iranian president retorted with an old Iranian saying, "It's like chicken soup: it may not help but it won't kill you."
Iran's President is then expected to head to Venezuela for a meeting with his peaceful and progressive ally, President Hugo Chavez - an event which media analysts predict will trigger a sharp increase of peace and progress in the known universe.
See also Twelfth Imam is Coming to Town in People's Karaoke!

"Sing Along With Ahmadinejad" series are brought to you by the International Council For Peace, Progress, and the Destruction of Israel.

Mikhail T. Kalashnikov

Comrade Blogunov
Comrades! We must not let this progressive brother go unrewarded! Surely Columbia will offer him an honorary PhD in Peace Studies or something like that. What would be a fitting award from the Cube to recognize the accomplishments of this champion of the martyred proletariat who stands boldly against the Zionist Conspiracy, the Busheoisie, and the Cheney Oiligarchy?Comrade Blogunov,Party Diplomat Ivan Drago
By the way, Comrade Pupovich, a rather out-of-topic question from a fan of your avatar image: How do you keep your fur so smooth and shiny? My hair keeps "upwards" like this since way before I was tasered!LoneRedStar
Yeah we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill),we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill) men.Ivan Betinov
Emergency call to Sister Massively Opiated: Please dispatch a level three cleaning squad to my location immediately. I find I need a good brain washing...make that a brain scrubbing...following Comrade Commissar Pupovich's description of "puppy oil." Hurry. Please. Send bleach.
Commissar Pupovich
I can see you are going to go far in the Party comrade. I know this as much to my surprise, I discovered I had a real talent for kissing up which along with perhaps some small ability for denouncing, helped me to be promoted to being a commissar. Not that I think you were kissing up, I can see you have a real appreciation for the finer arts of proper canine training.Commissar Pupovich
Now wait a minute comrades... lets not get ahead of ourselves. I haven't heard of even a single Rial that he has donated to the campaign. Nor let us forget that despite several admirable qualities and abilities Ahmadinejad has shown, he still enforces many anti-progressive laws such as forcing their wimmin to dress like lamp shades (no doubt the worst of his flaws, discriminating against gays, drug users, porn, beastiality, necrophillia, appliance love, and his beliefs in a "god." I certainly cannot see him as earning an Order of Hillary. Perhaps a pat on the back maybe.Commissar Pupovich
This will surely put the fear of Allah into the infidels! Oh wait, I am an infidel. But hey, it does fly....Comrade Blogunov
Therefore, Achdelieberninjadude is progressive and enlightened even if he isn’t. Also, did you notice his shiny hair?Comrade Blogunov
BTW, it looks like an F-5 with a new tail job. Hopefully, the modified parts were made in China.Comrade Blogunov
Welcome, Comrade Drago! With your skills and background, I believe you would make a good interrogator/counselor at one of our Karl Marx Treatment Centers or state universities, especially for stubborn cases that resist reeducation.Commissar Pupovich
But as Commissar of Eco-Prostitution and Mental Health, I can certainly give a soldier such as your self a discount weekend pass to your local Party Pleasure Palace. *Pup busily calculating how much to raise the "regular" price so as to keep his...er... the Party's cut the same after the "discount."*Comrad Bubalasky
Ukmeenisablojob will surley be welcomed by a burkad Hillary and perhaps she can cover those big ankles as well. We must elect Hillary as she along with our dems in the Senate and Congress will promote our cause algorithmically. [/i][/b]Comrad Bubalasky
Ahh, Commissar Pupovich, it seems the puppy oil is fogging your thoughts. I suggest not speaking ill of the hooved one for fear of retribution, let us not forget Mr. Foster.

The Tsarevna
LoneRedStar
Yeah we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill),we come in peace (shoot to kill..... shoot to kill) men.Ivan Betinov
In the days of my youth on the Collective Farm I knew and appreciated bourbon whiskeys on a basis so regular that it defied imagination and supported entire peasant economies.Commissar Pupovich
Comrade Beezelbob, from what I understand from the news, your leaders have also shown a most non progressive intolerance of peace loving muslims who only seek to live under sharia law and all the benefits that come from this?Commissar Pupovich
I am glad you like talking to the animals.... I have always wanted to ask, how is it ya' don't fall off the globe living down under?Quote:
Banned from any ActiveX activity? Never heard of such. Have you let the Chairman install his Meowism 4.72 program? It hasn't been tested as well as it should before release. I understand that there have been a large number of party computers infected by a "sleeper" worm to monitor your onlin.....ity....ega ds....what the %*)&@_! is going on with my....Red Square
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