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Bolshevik centennial celebration marred by executions, coup

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A celebration at Behemoth State University of the 100th anniversary of the Bolshevik Revolution in Russia on November 7, 2017 (THIS Tuesday™) was unfortunately marred by some unforeseen events.

Many other celebrations of the glorious achievements of the Bolshevik Revolution held at U.S. universities had disappointing turnouts, with most students completely unaware of what exactly they were celebrating. So the Che Chapter of the BSU Student Revolutionary Soviet took it upon themselves to host their own event, and to celebrate it properly this time.

"We just knew that if the right people were in charge, we could make this celebration work for everybody," said the former comrade-president of the student organization earlier last week.

Unfortunately, things quickly unraveled at Saturday's revels leading to the execution and deportation of many of the party-goers.

One survivor, speaking on condition of anonymity, said everything was going smoothly until, "One guy said that communism was a great idea, if only it could be implemented properly. Then one of the organizers in a Stalin t-shirt shouted that it had already worked - perfectly - and who was this punk to question the great gains of the revolution. Well, then up come some guys with Mosin-Nagants, I thought they were reenactors or something, and they took him, his girlfriend, and the five other people at his table out back and just shot all of them."

"When that was over," the survivor continued, "the guy in the Stalin t-shirt announced that the poisonous influence of the bourgeois counter-revolutionaries had been purged. He went on about how everybody was now literate, and that the student chapter had made great strides in technology like the invention of the rotary dial telephone and the eight track player. We all started applauding, but a student next to me had his arm in a cast and he stopped before everybody else. So the guys with the guns took him outside, too. It turns out he wasn't executed, he just got off with 20 years' hard labor in Siberia, and they had him on the train in no time."

"Well, then things really started getting messy. One guy at another table muttered that he didn't think executions were necessary, and that we should work peacefully within the system to bring about a socialist government. Man, bad move! He and everybody at the four tables around him were taken outside and shot. Then we heard a shot from inside the room, and suddenly the comrade-president was lying on the floor in a pool of blood. The guy in the Stalin t-shirt said that because of a tragic accident, he now had to take it upon himself to be the next comrade-president. Some people objected and a fight broke out, so I decided it was time to leave while I could. Besides, the snacks they promised never turned up, there was only enough food for the organization members."

When asked what he learned from all this, the survivor said, "Oh, communism is a great idea. With the right people in charge, I think it could work."

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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:“Oh, communism is a great idea. With the right people in charge, I think it could work.”

With the right people in charge, we could finally create a truly fair and equitable society wherein The Children™ could be shaped into the right people we need to create a truly fair and equitable society.

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I put this age old argument to my government students. One of them pointed out that the "right people" would want freedom and opportunity for their citizens, therefore communism requires having the wrong people in charge. A most equal response.

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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:... therefore communism requires having the wrong people in charge. ...
Exactly.

And thusly there are always wrong people - that is right people! (sample: guy in the Stalin t-shirt!) - in charge. And so they keep communism, that great idea, like thriving, and striving, and depriving, lastly starving..... oh, well, some konfusion here, maybe...

I think Komradette RedD would be the kompetent one to, like, continue...


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Genosse Dummkopf wrote:
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:... therefore communism requires having the wrong people in charge. ...
Exactly.

And thusly there are always wrong people - that is right people! (sample: guy in the Stalin t-shirt!) - in charge. And so they keep communism, that great idea, like thriving, and striving, and depriving, lastly starving..... oh, well, some konfusion here, maybe...

I think Komradette RedD would be the kompetent one to, like, continue...
Indeed, confusion is necessary, or, rather, it is a natural concomitant of the postmodernist deferral of meaning joined with the rise of neo-nominalism so that to name is to be ... or something. It really does not matter so long as the revolution proceeds.

This is so exciting. When do the show trials begin? Alleyway executions are very nice, but show trials have always been dear to my heart. They are so very very progressive.

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RedDiaperette wrote:
Genosse Dummkopf wrote:
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:... therefore communism requires having the wrong people in charge. ...
Exactly.

And thusly there are always wrong people - that is right people! (sample: guy in the Stalin t-shirt!) - in charge. And so they keep communism, that great idea, like thriving, and striving, and depriving, lastly starving..... oh, well, some konfusion here, maybe...

I think Komradette RedD would be the kompetent one to, like, continue...
Indeed, confusion is necessary, or, rather, it is a natural concomitant of the postmodernist deferral of meaning joined with the rise of neo-nominalism so that to name is to be ... or something. It really does not matter so long as the revolution proceeds.

This is so exciting. When do the show trials begin? Alleyway executions are very nice, but show trials have always been dear to my heart. They are so very very progressive.
It was found out later that each execution was followed by a guilty sentence and a fair (show) trial full of juicy denunciations. We are sticklers for protocol, which is why no crime has ever been committed by a communist regime - ever, and we're very proud of that.

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Another Socratic question:

If socialism and communism are really great as long as the right people are in charge, how come the wrong people always find ways to be in charge every time it's tried?

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(Komrade! Revisit Lenin's Mausoleu.., uh, I mean, Lenin's Log live!)

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Graves are just speedbumps on the road to utopia.


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... and in a jiffy, this :

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(real life - St. Petersburg (not FL, Russia), April Fools' Day 2009,
famous Finland-Station-Lenin, somewhat amateurishly bombed)

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Komrades,

I found this great song that celebrates the Glorious History of the Bolshevik Revoloootion, and then some, to share with the Kollective. Let's see you bust some moves to this Genosse!



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Epic, indeed! _(and now march, march, to Kolyma...)


 
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