The People's Library Collection of Books with No Pages

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The People's Library has an extensive collection of books with no pages, any of which can be easily read on your two-minute break from the beet fields or community shovelling.

These are also suitable for those who learned the skill of reading at one of our excellent union-staffed public schools. Please feel free to browse a sample of our titles below and come by if something is of interest to you.

Remember, these books have no pages, so they will be of no use whatsoever during the next toilet paper shortage.


Successful Green Energy Investments
by Barack Obama

My Thoughts on Personal Liberty
by Nanny Michael Bloomberg

Actual Hard Scientific Evidence Supporting the Theory of Human-Induced Climate Change
by Michael Mann

The Relevance of Newspapers in the 21st Century
by NY Times Publisher Pinch Sulzberger

Socialist Policies That Actually Work
by French President Francois Hollande

Turbo Tax Tips
by Tim Geithner

My Ideas for Stimulating the Economy
by Ben Bernanke

Things I've Actually Accomplished (Instead of Just Getting the Credit For)
by Barack Obama

My Low-Consumption Small-Carbon-Footprint Lifestyle
by Al Gore

How #Occupy Wall Street Has Changed America For the Better!
by Inmate #54623

Handbook of Modern Journalistic Ethics
by Kim Jung Un

The Future of GM
by Rick Wagoner Kent Kresa Ed Whitacre Dan Akerson

Diplomatic Triumphs of Soft Power
by Hillary Clinton

How The New Bullet Train Will Benefit California
by Gov. Jerry "Moonbeam" Brown

The Truths Revealed By My Movies
by Michael Moore

How Do I Love Barack Obama, Let Me Count the Ways!
by Bill Clinton

The Honesty, Integrity and Wisdom of Harry Reid
by His Friends

Why Barack Obama Deserved the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize
by Liu Xiaobo

The Ways Public Employee Unions Benefit Society
by Stockton, CA Mayor Ann Johnston

Why Barack Obama MUST Be Re-elected
by Anna Wintour

Today's Political Class's Approach to Solving Problems
by U. Gotta & B. Kidding

The Logic Behind The ObamaCare Decison
by Chief Justice John Roberts

How I Sacrificed Self-Interest In Favor of Public Service
by Michelle Obama

Changes Theresa and I Have Made On A Personal Level to Combat Climate Change
by John Kerry

Good Reasons to Consider Purchasing A Chevy Volt
by U. R. Stuck

Proof the Stimulus Worked!
by Napoleon Krugman


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I bet that if Obama gets reelected, the first thing he does is fire Hillary, just for the sake of screwing up Bill. He only included Hillary in the Obama I (and hope Obama Only) administration for a political calculation: he would need Bill in 2012.

I only wish I don't get a chance to verify this: from the bottom of my heart wish Obama loses.

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Are any of these titles available for the Kindle or Nook?

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Commissarka Pinkie, there's a comprehensive website which lists all of Dear Leader's Positive Achievements in chronological order:

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The Ultimate Glamour and Fashion Guide
by Michelle Obama

On Moving Legislation
by Harry Reid, with an introduction by Charles Schumer

Profiles in Courage, II
by John Boehner, with an introduction by Lyndsay Graham

Getting There The Old-Fashioned Way
by Barack Obama, with an introduction by Van Jones

Emotional Intelligence
by Nancy Pelosi, with an introduction by Debbie Whatshername Schultz

Under the Influence: A Guide to the Myths and Realities of Alcoholism
by Hillary Clinton, with an introduction by de facto Secretary of State Huma Abedin

My Good Movies and My Good Presidents
by Spike Lee, with introduction by Russell Simmons

The Moral Person's Guide to Honesty and Truthful Reporting in Modern Television Journalism
by Andrea Mitchell, with an introduction by George Stephanopoulis

It's Not Just About Me
by Barack Obama, with an introduction by Barack Obama

The Case for Why the First Lady of the United States Should Be Paid Millions of Dollars Per Year
by Michelle Obama

Other People's Money: the Ultimate Guide to Vacationing On Millions of Dollars Per Day
by Michelle Obama

Look Good, Smell Good
by Michelle Obama

The Busy Person's Guide to Weight Loss
by Chris Christie, with an introduction by Michelle Obama

The Collective Intellectual Prowess of the Congressional Black Caucus
by Sheila Jackass Lee, with an introduction by Maxine Waters

Traditions of the Indian Family and Raising Children the Indian-Giver Way
by Elizabeth Warren, with an introduction of Harvey Weitzman

America the Beautiful
by George Soros, with an introduction by Cher

Determinism Or Free Will
by Michael Bloomberg

The Lesbian's Guide to Avoiding Discrimination Against the Opposite Sex In the Workplace
by Janet Napolitano

Obama and History
by Vladmir Putin

Original Works, Volumes I and II
by Fareed Zakaria, with an introduction by Timer-Warner CEO Jeffrey Bewkes

Faithful Relationships: Keeping Your Boyfriend On a Short Leash, Both Literally and Figuratively
by Anderson Cooper

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Robert Fine wrote: Original Works, Volumes I and II
by Fareed Zarkawia

Ummm, wonder how much of this one was "borrowed" from other sources?