Attention all inclusive, tolerant, honest, and progressive comrades:

Barack Obama has made it perfectly clear on many occasions. We are all born equal. So why do some rise to the heights, while others descend to the depths of our society? Obviously, society is defective. How else can these differences be explained?


With that simple truth to guide us, our party has implemented laws, written rules, and set standards of behavior to guide our fellow Americans. Yet stubbornly, - some might say maliciously - certain citizens have refused to follow our advice. The results of such indifference to official party policy were totally predictable; i.e., many children continue to reach adulthood feeling less than equal to others. These sensitive children, burdened as they are by life's demands, have sought shelter from their feelings of inadequacy by withdrawing from daily participation in society.

As we all know, bullying has been deemed a prime cause of the feelings described above. Lately, we have made great strides toward the elimination of bullying in our schools and places of work. But this is not enough, comrades. There is still more to be done to end all forms of discrimination in every area of our lives. It is with this in mind that a new, progressive Website has been launched and the next word for banning has been chosen. That word is “BOSSY!” BanBossy.com

As Comrade Hillary Rodham Clinton once noted: “Women are the world's most underused resource.” You and I can change that, comrades. Together we can assure the equality of all future girls and women in this “man's” world. Yes we can! I urge you to help us use women and take advantage of them in every way possible.

For further study and suggestions related to starting your own peer group “Circles” I recommend this related LeanIn Website: Here you will learn how to best accomplish the necessary banning of that insidious word “BOSSY!.”

Just a sample from the LEANIN site linked above: “When a little boy asserts himself, he's called a “leader.” Yet when a little girl does the same, she risks being branded “bossy.” Words like bossy send a message: don't raise your hand or speak up. By middle school, girls are less interested in leading than boys—a trend that continues into adulthood. Together we can encourage girls to lead.”

Captain Craptek wrote: Yes we can! I urge you to help us use women and take advantage of them in every way possible.

So the phrase " fix me a sandwich, bring me a beer and be naked when you deliver them" is ok again? Glorious news, comrade! I shall enjoy watching the first of us who tests this new acceptable phrase with Commisarka Pinkie. I'll be a safe distance away.

Is that Julia at the Ban Bossy site?

Captain Craptek wrote:Attention all inclusive, tolerant, honest, and progressive comrades: ....

Dear Captain Craptek, your article on "How Circles Jerk Work" moved me immensely. Especially the part on unions and circles, which jerked me into action. Even now I look forward to a satisfying and fulfilling Happy Ending to this impending issue.

I have long been fantasizing about wanting to assemble a "personal team" of cheerleaders and it is ohhhhhhhhh, so gratifying ... to know that Dear Leader approves.

Of course this is hardly surprising, he is an expert on the topic.

Comrades, I will say how proud I am of all of us that we have finally brought the RethuliKKKans War on Womyan into full swing with this brand new LeanIn initiative.

As a Pre-Op, Anglo-Saxon, Heterosexual Male, I've realized that any success I've had was because it was taken from the discriminated & downtrodden [insert minority currently in spotlight to deflect Dear Leader's political failure in Crimea] womyans. My tone especially to strong woman calling them the hurtful and desecrating word b*tch c*nt slut skank whore bossy to our younger future female leaders, allowing them to deal with the eventual reality of adulthood in a way that only a true Comrade can ensure!

Hopefully, by admitting how much I've hurt these incredibly sensitive, irrational, & incredibly emotional strong willed female population, we have begun our next step into the Glorious World of Next Tuesday!™

Men, let us tear down the glass ceiling of our past oppression (that you know you're totally guilty of, so don't you deny it, chauvinist pigs) and show these young woyman how to lead us into a better world.

FORWARD!
No...LeanIn, Comrades!

Captain, I must salute your genius. The filthy rubes will not survive our combined might!