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Life Imitates Zappa: don't you eat that yellow snow

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This was just on the news ticker on a local all news station:

Russia says mysterious yellow snow not toxic

02 Feb 2007 16:57:39 GMT
Source: Reuters

MOSCOW, Feb 2 (Reuters) - Mysterious yellow snow that fell on parts of Siberia earlier this week is not toxic, Russian emergency officials said on Friday.

The emergency ministry has flown a chemical laboratory to the Omsk region in Siberia to investigate the matter.

"Yellow snow that fell on Omsk region two days ago poses no threat to people's health," Vladimir Gurzhei, a regional emergency official, told Interfax news agency. He said the snow was "yellow, with oily marks and a distinctive smell".

Omsk region is home to a number of oil and gas refineries. Domestic media debated what might have caused the anomaly.

Russia's weather watchdog said it may have been caused by a rare dust hurricane in neighbouring Kazakhstan. Alexei Yablokov of the Russian Academy of Science told Ekho Mosvky radio station it may have been polluted by an chemical accident in Siberia.

All I can say is, in the words of Frank Zappa:
Watch out where the Huskies go...
And don't you eat that yellow snow...

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Funny, I don't remember the song quite like this... It's actually a very well articulated cry of environmentalist anger about the plight of the Eskimoes, baby seals, and pollution as you will find... well ahead of it's time. And back then everyone laughed!

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Well... y'know the Russian Academy of Science has the incentive to cover up any danger... It might cause general panic if, for some reason, anyone were to think that great mounds of yellow snow falling from the sky was in any way dangerous, out of the ordinary, or presented an health threat in a place that is entirely covered in snow... we woulnd't want to overreact...

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Russian Academy of Science Health Inspector: "This meat looks fine to me. No yellow snow here. It is only yellow stuff. It can be boiled out with brine."

Courageous crew of Potemkin: "No, sir. That is bad yellow snow. We will not eat the yellow snow! No soup made from yellow snow! We will not eat soup made with the yellow snow!"

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I'm guessing you're liking the classic... what did you think of the Stair Scene?... You also have to see Eisenstein's Alexander Nevsky - Prokofiev (Prokoviev - sp?) did the score and it's amazing...

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It is courageous. A very well done documentary.

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Sister Massively Opiated wrote:This was just on the news ticker on a local all news station:

Russia says mysterious yellow snow not toxic
02 Feb 2007 16:57:39 GMT
Source: Reuters

MOSCOW, Feb 2 (Reuters) - Mysterious yellow snow that fell on parts of Siberia earlier this week is not toxic, Russian emergency officials said on Friday.
The emergency ministry has flown a chemical laboratory to the Omsk region in Siberia to investigate the matter.
"Yellow snow that fell on Omsk region two days ago poses no threat to people's health," Vladimir Gurzhei, a regional emergency official, told Interfax news agency. He said the snow was "yellow, with oily marks and a distinctive smell".
Omsk region is home to a number of oil and gas refineries. Domestic media debated what might have caused the anomaly.
Russia's weather watchdog said it may have been caused by a rare dust hurricane in neighbouring Kazakhstan. Alexei Yablokov of the Russian Academy of Science told Ekho Mosvky radio station it may have been polluted by an chemical accident in Siberia.


All I can say is, in the words of Frank Zappa:
Watch out where the Huskies go...
And don't you eat that yellow snow...


Nothing to worry about. This happened many times during the 70's, and our scientiests found nothing wrong with the yellow snow. They also concluded that it was a dust hurricane from the Kazakh provinces.


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That's nothing. If Al Gore were president, we could have had yellow snow and red snow - but mostly, of course, green snow - all year round. Damn Bushitler! Damn Florida! The polar bears are dying! Did you see the picture? The last two polar bears in the world standing in the last shrinking piece of ice in the world, and when it melts completely the polar bears are going to drown! And that will be the end of their entire race and the diverse polar bear culture! Damn Bushitler!

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As for the yellow snow in Siberia, it happens when the wind blows over those horse urine processing plants down south (in Kazakhstan) that make vodka called GEORGI to sell in the West.

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I'm really gonna miss the polar bears though... maybe it's just a Kanadjian thing... and our boreal forests... I'm gonna really miss them too...

.... sorry... it's just this cold and all the cough syrup interacting with the morphine and valium... it makes me weepy...

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Red Square wrote:The polar bears are dying! Did you see the picture? The last two polar bears in the world standing in the last shrinking piece of ice in the world, and when it melts completely the polar bears are going to drown! And that will be the end of their entire race and the diverse polar bear culture! Damn Bushitler!

They should make a new StarTrek movie where a race of interstellar polar bears are wreaking havoc on the earth in the 23rd century. The interstellar polar bears, on a mission to find out what happened to earth's now extinct vanished polar bears that all died because of the stupid blindness of man, unwittingly wreck havock on the world with terrible storms the like of which haven't been seen on earth since Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. Chekov hears the strange message being sent and instantly knows it is the call of siberian polar bears! The glacier-like space ship orbiting earth is trying to communicate with the now vanished species of earthling polar bears! The crew of the enterprise has to go back in time and save the very last polar bear couple just before they drown. We find out in the movie that polar bears are actually the most intelligent animals in the universe. Spock can talk to the polar bears and they are very angry at mankind. And Mrs polar bear is pregnant, too! They take the polar bears back to the 23rd century and the earthling polar bears answer the extra-terrestrial message so the polar bears from space stop all the havoc they've been causing earth and their cool looking huge glacer-like space-ship turns around and goes back to polar bear planet. At the end of the movie we see Mr and Mrs polar bear romping around the snow with their little baby polar bear and everyone in the audience realizes that its bad to kill polar bears with global warming 'cause they might save humanity some day.

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I'll need Sister's cough syrup with the morphine and valium to appreciate that one...

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What makes the Gulf Stream warm to begin with?? Perhaps Mexican urine, anybody, anybody at all?

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THATS IT! WE NEED THE MEXICANS TO COLLECTIVELY URINATE IN THE GULF TO KEEP IT WARM! HAHAHA! I SOLVED THE PROBLEM... YOU HEAR ME, MA! I SOLVED GLOBAL WARMING!

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Margaret wrote:...They should make a new StarTrek movie where a race of interstellar polar bears are wreaking havoc on the earth in the 23rd century. The interstellar polar bears, on a mission to find out what happened to earth's now extinct vanished polar bears that all died because of the stupid blindness of man, unwittingly wreck havock on the world with terrible storms the like of which haven't been seen on earth since Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. Chekov hears the strange message being sent and instantly knows it is the call of siberian polar bears!....everyone in the audience realizes that its bad to kill polar bears with global warming 'cause they might save humanity some day.

They kinda have... it's called The Golden Compass (Northern Lights in the UK) from the His Dark Materials Trilogy by Philip Pullman... another rabid atheist, he refers to it as his Anti-Narnia series... He, like me, felt betrayed by C.S. Lewis when upon reading the Narnia books he realized they were a fundamentally Christian story... kind of a kick in the teeth for me as an eight year old, I can tell you... First movie - The Golden Compass - should be out shortly... I think they're in post right now... The Catholic Church is pissed with Nicole Kidman for taking on one of the main characters, as she is a practising Catholic and there are specific anti-Catholic references in the story (The General Oblation Board, for example).

Oh.. and Meow... It's all about SAVING THE CHILDREN (kinda)... and THE PANZER BEARS (Panserbjørne... armoured bears in the story)...

Oh... and CO... he wrote a book called Galatea, just for a bit of weird synchronicity...

I'll need Sister's cough syrup with the morphine and valium to appreciate that one...

Actually Red, you'll need it to understand Pullman's books too, but they're worth the buzz...

... and on that note... I'm off to see if I can't get reconnected to my mail server... sweet dreams...

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Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:THATS IT! WE NEED THE MEXICANS TO COLLECTIVELY URINATE IN THE GULF TO KEEP IT WARM! HAHAHA! I SOLVED THE PROBLEM... YOU HEAR ME, MA! I SOLVED GLOBAL WARMING!
That's a lot of soft drinks! Do I smell a new great opportunity? A new Gold Rush! We need to get the UN to mandate that the biggest polluter, the US, pays Mexico for this program. Oh the freely flowing stream of tax ca$h! We'll call it "Drinks For Golden Showers" or something like that. As the originator of the idea, Chairman gets 60% from kickbacks on Gatorade and Paul Newman's Cranberry Punch contracts.

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I'm not sure, but doesn't that kind of give new meaning to El Niño?

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Well, all the urine might turn the Gulf yellow.... but that's a calamity I'm willing to take in order to save the world for the children. We could always rename the Gulf the Golden Sea of Hope... hmmm, yeah, and open expensive luxury resorts along the "Golden Coast".... hmm... the amonia found in urine may kill off all the aquatic life.... oh well, let's just do what we always do and blame the Republicans if such a disaster were to happen!

OH! When hurricane season arrives, the hurricane will suck up the urine tainted waters and then rain down piss on the red-states! PERFECT! I remember working on such a project in the PRC many years ago... we came up with a way to evaporate dog piss so it will rain on capitalist pig golfers in sunny Kalifornia.

MmmmMMmmmm... I can taste that contract... oh so yummy... oh so very yummy.

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Ah yes... another classic example of: If I didn't want to know the answer, I shouln't have asked the question.... at least this might explain the yellow snow in Siberia...

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No, SMO, it does explain the yellow snow in Siberia - end of story, nothing to see here. I will be expecting your contribution to the Punchenko Global Renewal Fund for answering this pressing (and profitable) evironmental question. I will also need you to clean up the poopies my little pet birdie left all over my desk.... I fed him beeferoni... so be sure to bring a mop, a bucket and some sort of scrubbing device. Or you could just use your finger nails to scrap off the poo... that works too.

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Geez... this is just like the time you fed Rusty all that Beef-A-Reeno and he got such bad gas when he was taking Susan's parents through the park... so sick everywhere and... oh wait.. that was a Seinfeld episode...

Doncha worry your little head over my mop-up methods... Sister is professional.

MUJUMBO! (it's the new MACACA!)
SMO

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Seinfeld is nothing more than Zionist propaganda and should not be viewed by anyone. Now if you'll excuse me, Seinfeld is coming on at 11:30 and I can't miss it.


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Yes, but the re-runs are priceless...uhh.. not that I'm watching such decadent filth. Ummm, quick! Look over there! <scurries away>


 
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