Medicate Your Children to Guarantee Compliance

Dear Comrades,

The Manhattangrad Department of Mandatory Health has announced that is has succeeded in diagnosing 20% of the Young Socialists in the school system with some form of mental illness, thus achieving their quota which is designed to keep pace with Party’s overall goal of doubling the number of disabled workers and peasants in the next decade.

Aside from the obvious social benefits of having more disabled children who are qualified for even more benefits, the medicating of these children is helping to stimulate the Pharmaceutical industry at a rate of more than $7 billion per year.

High school and college children also benefit from collectivizing their younger siblings’ medications for use as study aids and social purposes, making these medications indispensable for the overall health of our State.

It has long been a teaching of the Party that non-compliance with directives is a form of mental illness, and so children who are unable to sit still and pay attention during indoctrination activities will naturally grow to become politically defective non-conformists.

It is essential that all children follow instructions and obey their teachers, as servants of the State, without question.

Therefore, children exhibiting the symptoms of mental illness, such as the need to move around during hour-long political lectures or the desire to talk while a commissar-instructor is presenting them with important political teachings, must be immediately medicated into a docile state of passivity and openness. This way, all impediments to proper ideological formation can be abolished through corrective political pharmacology.

The more children are successfully diagnosed as disabled, the more of them can join their parents in the great joys of equality and collectivization through State disability benefits.

Medicate children to guarantee compliance!
Conformism through pharmacology!

Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People’s Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Dialectical Progressivism Translator
 

 

Comrade Nomenclature Climber,

You are wise to remind us of the importance of properly medicating children:



--KOOK
 

There is Absolutely NOTHING Creepy about Kamerad KOOK's video. Absolutely NOTHING! It just shows The Citizens Of TOMORROW displaying their Eagerness To Participate In The World Of Next Tuesday! True Citizens Patriots Will Find Nothing Wrong With That Expression Of Our Revolutionary Fervor!
 

Apparatchik Unkulturny

There is Absolutely NOTHING Creepy about Kamerad KOOK's video. Absolutely NOTHING! It just shows The Citizens Of TOMORROW displaying their Eagerness To Participate In The World Of Next Tuesday! True Citizens Patriots Will Find Nothing Wrong With That Expression Of Our Revolutionary Fervor!

I agree, Comrade Apparatchik, but we both forgot to marvel at how well the adults are likewise medicated with Aid that's Kool. It works even better than this uncomfortable straight-jacket.

Unfortunately, my children are too old to be properly indoctrinated. Somehow they acquired those backward, libertarian, limited-government ideas I used to spout before I gained enlightenment through the mirale of Gulag Re-Education. Now, who drank the rest of my last bottle of Stoli in this quarterly ration? Stoli is almost as good as the Aid that's Kool, and it even kills the pain (of knowning) more effectively.

--KOOK
 

Is better to become impervious to indoctrination by not graduating. Ignorance can be bliss for those who don't get with program. Booze takes care of the rest. Look what it did to and for me. 3 days ago I almost got accused of Ideology, and all I was angling for was a beet in my martini. In Life, there are Absolut s. And there are the cheapass reagent paint strippers.
Skoolzout. Let's keep it that way.
 

Compliance is only one reward of medicating the young. The second is thatunionized teachers school systems that are overwhelmed with teaching children who may fantasize about becoming capitalists will receive more redistributed funds in order to create better, more precise methods of propagandizing curricula and teaching methods. No child will be left behind in our march toward progress.
 

*Frog out*
(Meaning: Prog Off)
Did anyone notice that in the background of KOOK's video the 0bama poster looks a lot like the Japanese war flag during WWII? Red "sunrays" pointing out from the center, only instead of a red sun in the middle, it has 0bama's logo.

*Frog back in*(Meaning: Prog On)
Children are owned by the State. The State knows what is best for them. The State requires compliance, because that is what is best for all of us. These medications have no bad side effects. I know all this because the State said so, and the State never lies. Except when it is run by a Republikan.
 

This flag is obviously on loan from the Craptek collection.

 

In Amerika, 4 percent of the world’s population uses 88 percent of the Ritalin produced worldwide...I sense no danger here!
 

Free Drugs!?! I'm In!

Are You IN?

Comrade Obama wants to know....

Hail Obama!
 

"Sluggish Schizophrenia"....that's the terrible disease that caused so many good comrades in the USSR to doubt the wisdom of the Kremlin and to be attracted to Western mores, movies, and McDonald's. Thankfully, psychiatry was so advanced there that many of them were cured enough to lead productive lives...in institutions, of course.

Of course, now we see that epidemic begin to grow in our own country: those skeptical of Dear Leader's wonderful, protective advances in monitoring us; people like that silly Snowden guy who leaked information about this protection, and is now trying to leave our glorious collective; Tea Party "patriots" who don't understand what a privilege it is to have one's taxes audited (especially if you find out you have been chosen to pay MORE); writers who produce decadent literature damning socialism and advocating capitalism....let's just hope that soon psychiatry in this country will grow enough to provide the expert treatment of sluggish schizophrenia such as the brave Soviet doctors before them did.
 

Comrade Kelly - Poking ones self in the eye with a sharp pencil will focus the attention when drugs are lacking.