News We Don't Have Time To Write About (archive)

[Margaret]

"Waiter, there's soup in my bowl of flies!"

[Margaret]

Karen Magazine Exclusive: Karentocracy Today, Tomorrow, and Forever! Maine's Shenna Bellows inspiring thoughts on Karentocracy

[Margaret]

If we were to find an advanced civilization on another planet in the universe that has been using fossil fuels for centuries doing just fine would it be covered-up?

[Margaret]

Claudine Gay had to resort to plagiarism because of colonialism

[Margaret]

Steamboat Willie to star in remake of The Battleship Potemkin

[Ivan the Stakhanovets]

Biden to visit Dallas TX on Sunday. FBI closes Grassy Knoll for (cough) "Maintenance."

[Margaret]

"Before we slide the cattlecar door shut, anyone care to bequeath a legacy donation?"

[Margaret]

“Our Democracy,” the New Nationalism

[Ex-President Autopen]

New Potemkin Policy: From now on all Secretaries of Defense must call in before they abandon their post and go AWOL

[Margaret]

WH economists predict 2024 will feel like we're in a bad recession but it won't be

[Margaret]

Popular Psychosis magazine: How to make your own Doomsday Clock

[Margaret]

Biden campaign idol to be "Democracy" The Golden Donkey.

[Margaret]

Due to all the winter cold problems associated with EVs new regulations mandating everyone living in the northern states to seasonally move south for the winter will need to be implemented, says EPA

[Margaret]

Principles founded on reality and living our lives around them is our strength.

[Margaret]

Milei’s speech nailed to the door of Congress

[Ex-President Autopen]

President Potemkin's Middle East Two-Faced Solution will give President Potemkin a big Two-Faced policy win for the 2024 election cycle!

[Margaret]

Harvard is the Sports Illustrated of higher education minus the free market

[Margaret]

How soon to Utopia? TPC unveils the Next Tuesday Clock.

[Margaret]

YOUR TAX DOLLARS TO IRAN AT WORK: American Troops Killed, Many Wounded in Jordan By Iranian Proxy Militia Drone Attack

[Margaret]

Hillary Barbie now to come with her own little toy boxed wine

[Margaret]

"I was merely following orders," testifies Mayorkas

[Margaret]

"We don't want to anger Iran and have this thing escalate," says Biden about Iran's threat to nuke the US unless we surrender to them unconditionally

[Margaret]

Biden hints at perestroika and glasnost if reelected

[Margaret]

The ghost industries built by Bidenomics are haunted by ... ghosts

[Margaret]

Karen Magazine Exclusive: Tired of everyone saying "See you Next Tuesday, Karen"? Hate crime is crime. Our lawyers show you how to sue for big bucks!

[Margaret]

Military recruitment standards so low they enlist a very confused Joe Biden who wandered in

[Red Square]

Military recruitment standards so low they enlist a very confused Joe Biden who wandered in

[Margaret]

“Free speech gagged by Michael Mann” mouth wrappings are in. If you don’t toe the political line you will get sued.

[Margaret]

If all cultures are equal no one needs asylum

[Margaret]

The use of the term “renewable energy” is a clever use of words meant to convince the gullible they’ve discovered perpetual motion energy. 

 

[Margaret]

Hochul assures businesses not to fear what happened to Trump could happen to them as it was all purely political

[Margaret]

Diversity requires a police state, individualism requires a free society

[Margaret]

The TPC Direction To Next Tuesday Moral Compass alway points toward Next Tuesday, shows you the way

[Margaret]

"Climate change refugees" turns out to be climate change policies refugees

[Margaret]

Biden cue card mixup at speech has him reading the dinner menu to the press instead of prepared statement on his health and fitness

[Margaret]

“Diversity” is brutally enforced conformity enforced by the modern Leftwing equivalent of the all-powerful ancient Roman Censors

[Margaret]

February hottest month on record! (Disclaimer: 80% of temperature data used was “homogenized.”)

[Margaret]

Congressional democrats propose an actual Bill of Attainder (in all but name) in order to keep Trump off the ballot

[Margaret]

New remake of The Lives of Others takes place in present day America. The plot centers around the monitoring of American residents by agents of the DEI, America's political watchdogs.

[Ex-President Autopen]

Sick and tired of Donald Trump's presidency and his crazy policies making America and the world less safe? Tired of Trumpenomics and Trumpinflation? Over the last three years the world has blown-up. Since Trump became President in 2020 everything has gone crazy. Vote for a return to normalcy.

2024: Vote President Potemkin for a change.

[Margaret]

EPA proposes new rule to mandate roofs over solar farms in order to prevent possible toxic chemical leaching into ground water due to weather breakdown and rain.

[Ex-President Autopen]

President Potemkin pronounces the rest of 2024 National Forgiveness of Bribery and Influence Peddling Year

[Margaret]

Coal fired plants are slowing the earth’s rotation and affecting the Countdown to Next Tuesday Clock

[Margaret]

Joe Biden's America: Spiraling chocolate prices so high chocolate bars have become a investment hedge against inflation

[Margaret]

Taylor Swift to fly to Indonesia give benefit concert for trans sex workers put out of work due to climate change

[Ex-President Autopen]

President Potemkin's national economic plan to lower inflation is working. March inflation down to 3.5 percent from February's 3.1 percent.

[Commissarka Pinkie]

Correction: Biden Admin's support for Israel not "ironclad" as reported, but "Iranclad." The White House regrets the error.

[Margaret]

Karen Magazine Exclusive: The Women of NPR photo spread

[Margaret]

Diversity: The many groups that make up the Popular Front.

Equity: Socialism; the collectivization of everything.

Inclusion: Knowing your place and insisting others know their place.
 

[Margaret]

“The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.” - Daniel J. Boorstin

[Ex-President Autopen]

Spontaneous worker celebrations across US praise President Potemkin’s central economic plan for economic growth of 1.6%!

[Margaret]

Mysterious marching Khaki-clad Jew hating racists who would appear out of nowhere and then disappear back into obscurity whenever Biden said the far right is our greatest danger for some reason not participating in any way in any of the largest racist Jew hate festivities in generations that attract such people if they're for real like flies to shit.

[Margaret]

Columbia University pro-Hamas protesters launch a barrage of rockets in preparation of rape, murder, torture and other acts of resistance against University genocidal colonial settlers

[Margaret]

On the student “protesters”: A martial society cannot be reasoned with, they are an army. The martial society is an army.

[Margaret]

The revolution will call Uber Eats for food

[Margaret]

President Biden tells campus protesters "Don't."

[Margaret]

"By any means necessary," is a call to war by people who have romanticized ideas of war, glory and their place in it and long for war

[Margaret]

The Tower of Babel is our strength

/sarc

[Margaret]

Direct Air Carbon Capture and Storage machines to capture the CO2 produced powering them in order to fulfill CO2 capture treaty obligations

[Margaret]

Democrats worried they might have to actually beat Trump at the ballot box

[Margaret]

Multiculturalism is a suicide pact

[Margaret]

Go South young man, to Argentina

[Margaret]

After several of Hunter Biden's paintings are purchased arms shipments to Israel resumed

[Margaret]

Being born with either XX or XY chromosomes and everything that means is NOT “assigned” at birth.

[Margaret]

Battles are won by soldiers but wars are won by societies

[Margaret]

Tax and spend - Out. Steal and waste - In.

[Margaret]

NYT headline 2025: President Trump should pardon Joe Biden

[Margaret]

Socialism isn't the civilizing of Man. Socialism is the institutionalization of Man.

[Ex-President Autopen]

How can I best manipulate your vote this election cycle? Please let me know. I'm everyone's president!

[Ex-President Autopen]

No one is above the law. I AM THE LAW.

[Margaret]

America is Hong Kong and the democrats are the CCP

[Margaret]

Justice Cubed - Every square of justice is red giving only one possible outcome: the People's justice

[Ex-President Autopen]

This year on the 4th of July every American will save a bundle as I'm outlawing all BBQs!

[Margaret]

CNN reporting has all the classic earmarks of CIA disinformation.

[Margaret]

Supreme Court finds only the Biden administration has standing to sue the Biden administration

[Margaret]

After Biden debate performance 81 million voters roll over in their graves

[Margaret]

The Ottoman Empire was the sick man of Europe. The democrat party is the sick man of America.

[Ex-President Autopen]

This morning I really chewed out my doctor for not giving me stronger drugs before the debate. America deserves better!

[Margaret]

It's the end of "democracy" as we know it and I feel fine

[Margaret]

Yes Virginia, there is a President Biden - from 10 am to 4 pm