Comrades, with the horrible and dreadful loss our party had to the evil rethugs on Tuesday, should we be planning a farewell party for Debbie Whatshername-Schultz, official scapegoat for the losses?

As we know, Dear Leader, sporting the haggard gray bleached blond look these days, has said he will not pivot and these are just a bunch of people in states that don't like him anyway.

Truly, this is not his fault. It is the fault of people from reichwing rethugikkkan states who are hatin' on him and don't approve of him, as he notes. These are states like Iowa and Colorado which he won in 2008 and 2012 as well as North Carolina which he won in 2008. Those are the people who don't like him.

And of course, the governorships of Massachusetts, Illinois, and Maryland don't matter either because these are just red states where the people are hatin' on Dear Leader all the time too.

Then there are Montana and West Virginia where our party's Senate candidate won in 2012 but did not win in 2014. So we just have to conclude that these are states that don't matter because the populations of those states are racist and are too busy hatin' on Dear Leader.

But anyway, regardless of all of the above, SOMEONE must be the scapegoat. And Debbie Hyphenatedname-Schultz was in charge of making sure our party kept control of the Senate and took back the House. She has already achieved non-person status.

So, when do we say our tearful goodbyes as she departs for a gulag in Siberia? And as she leaves, will her hair be straight or Medusa style?

First we must have a show trial and declare her to be an irremediable racist.

Well, Comrade Vlad,

We don't actually know how her hair will turn out, even though this is very important to her investigation. Frankly, I think, for legal purposes, they should call her Debbie Washerhair Schultz.

For the show trial, H/T RedDiaperette, I have it on good authority that this leak will be submitted. If so, she's toast!

RedDiaperette wrote:First we must have a show trial and declare her to be an irremediable racist.

Yes! Yes! A show trial! I love the idea. Dear Leader can drag her by the hair, through the streets of the Holy Imperial City, DC, to the stocks where she can be given the back of His hand 100 times.

After that, exile!

Comrade Vlad Linen wrote: She has already achieved non-person status.

So, when do we say our tearful goodbyes as she departs for a gulag in Siberia?

How can we say goodbye to someone who officially no longer exists? Besides, I've already issued her a refurbished shovel.