Letter To Ahmadinejad From Jay Leno



I mean, you haven't heard some of my best material from the '70's and I was in my prime back then. Listen to this: "The Republicans want to screw the working man out of his money. The Democrats want to screw the working man." Hi - friggin' - larious! But now it's all ruined and you're to blame.
My carrier may have slown down but if you think you can renege on an oral contract - in both senses of the word - then feel free to do so, but remember that I will sue you and your banana republic into the ground! Hell, I won't even let the federales give you Frank Sinatra Jr. out of pity, you'll be completely on your own. Remember Noriega? Yeah, that was me.
Yours Truly,
Jay Leno... See? Because of you I can't even say my own name without feeling a sense of revulsion.
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Text submitted by an anonymous comrade who prefers to remain an invisible mote in the vast collective






You've got mail. Returned mail stamped by the Iranian Postal Authorities as:
Insufficient Postage - Return to sender
and
The Office of His Excellency does not accept hate mail from failed, has been, late night, talk show hosts.