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Che Guevara: World's Greatest Car Salesman

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In addition to being world's best T-shirt salesman, comrade Che Guevara has recently gained fame of, perhaps, world's best car salesman - or at least best car salesman at Mercedes Benz, where he was also honored with a prestigious Employee of the Month Award and a commemorative plaque.

Three extra-ration cheers to Che! Let's help our comrade sell even more cars, thus infiltrating the heart of capitalist, oil-driven, industrialized Western civilization. How? Let's collectively generate new great car-selling slogans! After all, in the glorious communist future, the Party elites will need most equal cars from the most equal manufacturer!

See the example below.

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Special thanks to General Secretary for inspiration!

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OMDL.
Now I got to drag out all those Cher Shirts I put away for that other shirt.
Would Comrade Janis have approved?
Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz ?
My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends.
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
So Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz ?
I thought Che drove a Mule.
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Where do the beet go? Where is the Shovel Holders?

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Shake Weight? Or Che Weight?

It's not a car, but we now know that Che can sell anything!

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Comrade Guardian, the Beet Juice Hybrid will be available on the 2014 models.

As for the shovels, you need a yaKimJongIlima Rack - which is a lot like a Yakima rack, but made of cheap cardboard in the gulag.

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I hear that the Harvard School of Business wants Che to come and give a lecture on the advantages of free market economics versus murdering thousands of people in the name of the revolution/state.

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Indeed, my legions of fans! I have been very busy marketing the Party's ™ various state-controled ventures. Unfortunately, Government Motors ™ did not pass the high standards set by the Poltiburo. We were reluctantly forced to support Mercedes Benz (IMHO the best engineered vehicle out there).

(UPDATE)
In another swift turn of events, Mercedes dropped my endorsement like a hot potato, saying that they had no idea that Che' was a blood-thirsty mass murderer who loved to kill for the thrill??? Lies, all lies! I never killed for fun......only to further our glorious message of REVOLUTION! (I have just declared all-out-war on this Heritage Foundation??....spits on the floor and waves his pistolas wildly in the air)
I am hereby officially DENOUNCE Mercedes Benz for their obvious stupidity! They don't realize what a fantastic sales/spokesman they have lost!

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Che Gourmet wrote:Indeed, my legions of fans! I have been very busy marketing the Party's ™ various state-controled ventures. Unfortunately, Government Motors ™ did not pass the high standards set by the Poltiburo. We were reluctantly forced to support Mercedes Benz (IMHO the best engineered vehicle out there).

(UPDATE)
In another swift turn of events, Mercedes dropped my endorsement like a hot potato, saying that they had no idea that Che' was a blood-thirsty mass murderer who loved to kill for the thrill??? Lies, all lies! I never killed for fun......only to further our glorious message of REVOLUTION! (I have just declared all-out-war on this Heritage Foundation??....spits on the floor and waves his pistolas wildly in the air)
I am hereby officially DENOUNCE Mercedes Benz for their obvious stupidity! They don't realize what a fantastic sales/spokesman they have lost!Image

A breakdown in the Party Lines of Communication?
Since when has any Company the right to determine it's own Future?
This is not a Free world and Mercedes must learn there is a price to pay for not toeing the Party Line.
Immediate action should be taken to cut off their access to Beet Ethanol.
If their cars cannot move (Like all good and well built Peoples Cars) then no obscene profit can be made and they cannot exploit the people for their hard earned rubles.
(Curiosity, how many beet crops would it take to own one?)

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Che Gourmet wrote: (UPDATE)
In another swift turn of events, Mercedes dropped my endorsement like a hot potato, saying that they had no idea that Che' was a blood-thirsty mass murderer who loved to kill for the thrill??? Lies, all lies! I never killed for fun......only to further our glorious message of REVOLUTION! (I have just declared all-out-war on this Heritage Foundation??....spits on the floor and waves his pistolas wildly in the air)
I am hereby officially DENOUNCE Mercedes Benz for their obvious stupidity! They don't realize what a fantastic sales/spokesman they have lost!Image
I'm sorry, brother. I share your pain in the oppression these capitalist vipers have caused you. I'm going to call them right now, not only to denounce them, but to explain to them what a marketing gold mine the Che name is, especially to the "hip" whore generation they pander to. It's too bad they were turned off by your, shall we say, less than pristine, reputation. Maybe they will consider another, equally valuable, Che. Maybe someone of the gentler, female persuasion. Hmm.

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Cheneane Guevaralo wrote:
Che Gourmet wrote: (UPDATE)
In another swift turn of events, Mercedes dropped my endorsement like a hot potato, saying that they had no idea that Che' was a blood-thirsty mass murderer who loved to kill for the thrill??? Lies, all lies! I never killed for fun......only to further our glorious message of REVOLUTION! (I have just declared all-out-war on this Heritage Foundation??....spits on the floor and waves his pistolas wildly in the air)
I am hereby officially DENOUNCE Mercedes Benz for their obvious stupidity! They don't realize what a fantastic sales/spokesman they have lost!Image
I'm sorry, brother. I share your pain in the oppression these capitalist vipers have caused you. I'm going to call them right now, not only to denounce them, but to explain to them what a marketing gold mine the Che name is, especially to the "hip" whore generation they pander to. It's too bad they were turned off by your, shall we say, less than pristine, reputation. Maybe they will consider another, equally valuable, Che. Maybe someone of the gentler, female persuasion. Hmm.
Toffana comes to mind although her victims only numbered in the hundreds. Mary Cotton the original Black Widow should be a candidate. Also Genene Jones the Texas nurse with a viable hatred for babies.
So many candidates for Mercedes. Of course there is also you. Which is what you meant in the first place. The Spirit of Competition must survive, properly controlled of course.

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In addition to being world's best T-shirt salesman and best car salesman, comrade Che Guevara has recently gained fame of, perhaps, world's best music salesman, winning yet another prestigious Employee of the Month Award and a commemorative plaque.

READ MORE HERE:

Che Guevara: World's Greatest Music Salesman

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Feds Spend $1.6 Million to Restore “La Raza” Murals Celebrating “Aztlan” and Che Guevara

At a time of record debt, rampant unemployment, and a financially strained citizenry – our Federal government somehow can afford a whopping $1,600,000 to restore “Chicano” murals depicting communist butchers Che Guevara and Fidel Castro, and with maps featuring “Aztlan” – the mythical “nation” that La Raza activists demand be taken from the United States to create a new ethnically-pure proto-Mexican state.

The funds are being provided by the Department of Transportation and is called a “federal transportation enhancement” (as if there are no unsafe bridges across America that could use the funds!)

The murals begun as Mexican nationalist graffiti in the 1970s. The graffiti was first painted on highway underpasses in an attempt to stop the construction of a California Highway Patrol office there. Activists proclaimed the area a “Chicano park” and appeasing leaders – fearing violence – “negotiated” with activists to keep the murals and cancel the police station.

The Federal money will pay to restore 18 panels. 9 have been restored so far. Funding was first approved in a Congressional earmark in 2002, but was (wisely) held up by the Bush DOT because of the frequent mention of the racist “Aztlan”. But with Obama and his La Raza sidekicks Hilda Solis and Cecilia Muñoz in power – and Latino votes to be bought – the funding is now going ahead full steam.

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Above: the first of several appearances of Communist murderer Che Guevara – darling of the left – who conducted more than 500 show trials and executions in Castro's Cuba.

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Above: Yet another appearance by Guevara, along with Castro (far right), and a flag declaring “The Race…YES, Border Patrol….NO” – oddly depicting Cesar Chavez' United Farm Workers flag above it – despite the inconvenient truth that Chavez himself was strongly opposed to illegal immigration and amnesty.

Your tax dollars at work promoting ethnic separatism and Communist icons in the good old U.S.A.

Our friend Progress Rose, who emailed me this link (she is the president of NY ICE), comments:
Ernesto was ACTUALLY arrested for being ILLEGALLY IN MEXICO. And, now, we have him as a part of monuments to Mexico and Aztlan!

You can't make this stuff up! And, of course, his image is presented here as much more darker-complexioned than he actually was. His full name was Ernesto Guevara Lynch; he was part Irish, and part of the Argentinian aristocracy. Ernesto looked white! But, illegal alien advocates want to misrepresent this as a war between the "brown" and "non-brown". (In most Mexican towns and villages where most of the illegals from Mexico are coming from, they are very racist against black people. So, they view this war NOT as "brown" against "white", but REALLY Mexican, described as "brown", against non-Mexican). AND, let us informed NY ICers never forget the violence with which the Mexican government treats its own illegals that are mostly from other countries in Latin America!

In the topsy-turvy, anything-goes, Orwellian world that illegal alien advocates inhabit, the FACTS about Ernesto do NOT matter. It's what he can be used for. They want you to think this man, who was actually arrested for being ILLEGALLY IN MEXICO, *was* Mexican! It's about getting what they want, NO MATTER how they have to lie to get it...

And, here the Federal Government helps them.


 
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