An open letter to the Islamic Republic of Iran

Dear Iranian Mullahs!

While our satirical website and your Propaganda Directorate deal in the same trade of making up facts and exaggerating reality, we are different in that we can recognize a spoof - but you apparently can't.

On Dec. 27, 2007 you used our spoof image on your propaganda website to illustrate a "true" statement that Jews are welcome in Iran and that Western reports about mass emigration of Iranian Jews are "lies spread by the Zionist hegemony."

---

The spoof image in question first appeared in 2005, in our parody called Israel Dismantles; World's Problems End, which revealed the absurdity of demands to dismantle Israel, with various nations, including Iran and Germany, celebrating the return of their long-missed Jews.

It gets better. Our Iranian friends tell us that the original Farsi-language placard says "Nuclear power is our absolute right," which means that you, dear Mullahs, used that image as a propaganda tool to advance your nuclear program - so you could threaten and maybe even annihilate the Jews in Israel. In our spoof, we changed the message of the placard to the complete opposite, making it appear improbable. To be fair, your story about Iran's love for the Jews was just as improbable, so it would seem only logical to put them together. It would, we repeat - if your goal were to publish a self-parody. That wasn't your intention, however. You only did it because you didn't know better.

Let's call it self-inflicted poetic justice.



Lesson: if you like to cheat, make sure you steal your answers from the correct cheat sheet.

When you try to back a stupid lie by using a spoof that ridicules your stupid lies, you thereby prove the spoofer's original point that (a) you are stupid and (b) you lie.

The same day you posted our image, a beginning video blogger from Israel went to your website and sensed a send-up. He quickly found the original picture in Google images and sent an inquiry to the People's Cube. After we confirmed that it was a spoof, he released a short video on YouTube detailing the fraud. On the following day the story was reported by Gateway Pundit and other blogs.

So let me ask you, dear Iranian Mullahs: how come they got the joke and you didn't? You must help us here because we're lost in various possibilities.

You didn't get the joke because...

• you have been lying for so long that you lost the ability to distinguish between truth and fiction
• you have been convinced by the unconditional support of the left-leaning Western media that anything goes and you'll be off the hook forever
• your religious zeal forces you to believe any line of Shiite
• you will eat anything that looks like a sausage
• you think all that glitters is gold
• you are buying a stairway to heaven
• all of the above

There also remains a possibility that you're simply not acquainted with the concept of sarcasm. Please be advised that rational people around the world value such things as humor, irony, and jokes - of which Islamic radicals are apparently unaware (if riots over Mohammed cartoons are any indication). Perhaps in the interest of world peace we should raise your awareness about jokes. It might even help you avoid further embarrassment, if you train your staff in laughing at jokes instead of killing the jokers.

Granted, it may defeat the very purpose of your existence. But hey, we all have to sacrifice something now and then! Besides, your existence in itself is a major embarrassment. Trust us: something's got to give.

We suggest you start by familiarizing yourself with knock-knock jokes. Then you can gradually switch to light bulb jokes, advancing to more complex blonde jokes, and eventually to puns - as in "Iran a bogus story and all I got was this lousy photoshopped image."

With any luck you will soon begin to understand even the MasterCard "priceless" jokes, such as this one:

• Financing a phony show of support for Iran's nuclear program - one million rials.
• Running a government propaganda website - ten million rials.
• Being pwned by the People's Cube because you posted their send-up of your own stupid spin - PRICELESS!!!

 

Comrade Red Square,
It may be easier for them to use an image from the People's Cube™ than to use a self-generated computer enhanced image, because they seem to have devoted All of their efforts and computer time to building an Atomic weapon. They need this to protect themselves from the Jews and the "Great Satan". This is more important than creating jobs or designing roads, buildings, public utilities, and other public infrastructure for the Iranian people.
It's too bad they didn't also use the "Everybody loves Ahmadinejad" parody in the sidebar too. It shows the world the great love and sensitivity for Jews and homosexuals that the Iranian President and the rest of the government has for these people. Just look at those uniforms on the Code Pink Jihad, what a great recruiting tool for their military.
As for telling the truth, they always tell the truth that they want to tell. Kind of reminds me of my first wife.
 

Quote:

We suggest you start by familiarizing yourself with knock-knock jokes


"Knock, knock"
"Who's there?"
"Photoshop"
"Photoshop who?"
"Precisely"

Quote:

Then you can gradually switch to light bulb jokes

Q: How many Iranian propagandists does it take to photoshop a light bulb?
A: None, it is easier to steal than to photoshop. Photoshopping requires individual talent and imagination with Adan Hajj being the exception.

And finally....

Did you hear the one about the gay blonde Iranian?
Of course not! No such thing exists! Ask Mahmoud, you Western infidel pig! May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits for suggesting such a blasphemy!
 

They really did that Comrade Red Square? They have another photo there now. What a glorious blog they have! Such news hounds so to speak! This is one quote I found in their "news."

It is hard to believe the paradox that Bhutto was the most precious American asset and that al-Qaeda which is supported by the US could have carried out the assassination.
 

No Islamic sense of humor? The Prophet Mohammed (peas and carrots be upon him) was justifiably famous for his antics with joy buzzers and whoppee cushions, novelty items first mentioned in the Koran. He created the following cartoon 1400 years before the concept of "that scwewy wabbit" was ever conceived in the West.


EMBEDDED VIDEO NO LONGER AVAILABLE
 

Whoa! Whoa! When I say whoa I mean whoa!

Look at what we are doing! Engaged in un-progressive competition over who has humor or not!

How many times has this Commissar bayed in the moonlight.... we need not care about what those Islamokooks do or think. They are useful to us in their way, but they will be useful to us regardless of whether we embrace them or hunt them down like mad cats.
 

Commissar Pupovich

They really did that Comrade Red Square? They have another photo there now.
PressTV realized they were being pwned and replaced the image in the morning of Dec. 29, 2007, ending more than two full days of pwnage. We pre-emptied their expected action with a screen capture. A corresponding amendment has been made to the original post above.

Also, I'm now receiving emails from people who ask me what "PWN" means. Here's the explanation: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=pwned
 

Jim from Gateway Pundit made another post about this story, and answered the challenge by making his own picture, referring to another incident when the Iranian Mullahs got punked.



He's not registered on the Cube, so he said "feel free."

(When will they learn that it's only the Party that can tell us whether we are allowed to "feel free" or not.)
 

 

IRANIANS HAVE HUMOR, CHECK OUT THEIR NUMBER ONE TV SHOW "AHAB"!


 

Red Square

(When will they learn that it's only the Party that can tell us whether we are allowed to "feel free" or not.)

This is so rich! Oh, it is good to be Commissar (bucking for Vice Chairman) for the People's Cube!
 

Comrad Bubalasky

IRANIANS HAVE HUMOR, CHECK OUT THEIR NUMBER ONE TV SHOW "AHAB"!

Comrade... you are confusing Arabs and Persians. Now the fact they may both harbor illusions of past glory and long for the death of the west, we must keep the facts straight, unless or until the Party decrees differently. Your mud puddle access will be cut back to one hour tomorrow.
 

Commissar Pupovich wrote

Quote:

Your mud puddle access will be cut back to one hour tomorrow.

Whoa! Whoa! When I say whoa I mean whoa! One hour over semantics?
 

Comrad Bubalasky

Commissar Pupovich wrote

Quote:

Your mud puddle access will be cut back to one hour tomorrow.

Whoa! Whoa! When I say whoa I mean whoa! One hour over semantics?

I know that seems a bit harsh, but sometimes we just need to enforce Party discipline, and when it is done arbitrarily and without rhyme or reason, it is even more efffective. It's for The Common Good™ you know. Of course, it you were to say, have something to offer er... the Party, or were to inform on someone etc., I am sure we could overlook this minor lapse.
 

This is such a coup. I just heard about your site through a friend, Harry, who owns GarbanzoToons, http://garbanzotoons.blogspot.com . This is classic, and just proves, once again, that lying and deception of infidels (taqiyya) is encouraged and part of the arsenal in the Islamic Terror Manual.
 

Commissar Pupovich

...the fact they may both harbor illusions of past glory and long for the death of the west...
Not all of them are as useful to the Party, however. According to some sources, from 70% to 80% of Iranians want an end to the mullocracy of the Islamic Republic and would like to live in a free Western-style democracy. The reason we don't hear those voices is that the Mullahs are good at maintaining their total control over the media, combined with physical intimidation and repressions against the opposition. Many are afraid to speak. Yet now and then students rallies break up, in which they openly support American policies. Such rallies usually end up with beatings of the students by the police.

In other words, while the current Iranian government is made of absolutely useful idiots, a large part of the Iranian population is not.
 

Welcome to the People's Cube Comrade Smooth Stone. Here is your shovel so you may begin digging for progress! The Party will issue you your opinions as needed.


 

OMG! lol! It looks as if we here on the cube are getting popular! What an honor it is to have a propaganda news station such as one in Iran use our material, even if only for a short while.

[off chracter]
Keep up the great work Comrade Red Sqaure! This is only evidence that you are doing a great job!
 

Dear Iranian Mullahs,
Since we all now know that you are big time fans of The People's Cube, and you visit this site regularly, I'd like to reach out my cartoon-loving hand in peace. I'd also like to offer some advice. After all, as a good progressive comrade, I believe in holding a dialogue with my genocidal enemies who would gladly cut my head off in front of my family after raping my wife and children in front of me. I understand my dogs would be safe from violation because dogs are haram, right? I don't own any goats or sheep, but I could buy some. I do want to show understanding to your needs, and of course, I understand the need to accommodate Islam.

But like I was saying, the animated cartoon, Sahara Hare, was made to appeal to the sense of humor of the viewer. The cartoon creates absurd situations (kind of like you do in Iran in tyrannizing your own people who long for freedom while blaming all of your self-inflicted problems on Israel) in order to create this humor. I could go on to explain every gag (or joke as you may wish to think of them in order to avoid confusion) but that would get as tedious as memorizing the Koran.

Just think of Yosemite Sam as you and your fellow mullahs, and think of Bugs Bunny as the Israeli people. For now we won't include Olmert Fudd in our discussion. It damages the analogy. Watch as many of these cartoons as you can. They are available on DVD so they should be easy for parasites like you to pirate. (No matter what anyone else tells you, "parasite" is a term of affection). Notice who wins every time. Also, it's a good thing that you do love Jews so much, because the Warner Brothers, at whose studios these "loony toons" were created were Jews.

Please respond so that we can keep this friendly and substantive dialogue going. If you have any further questions, I would be glad to answer them as would any of the other friendly folks here at your favorite site for satire.
Your Pal,
Great Stalin's Ghost
 

Great Stalin's Ghost

I understand my dogs would be safe from violation because dogs are haram, right?

Maybe safe from violation, but not "safe" comrade. For you see comrade, while the prophet Mohammed was having spasms and spitting out gibberish that only could be interpreted by him at a later date, declared that since dogs and cats are unclean, they were to be killed. Maybe you already knew that, but Fido will have to get in line with the rest of the family unit to his his had chopped off as well.
 

The Cube has made the major leagues once again! This time the Propaganda Department of the peaceful, non-nuclear Islamic Republic of Iran has used the Cube's material to smash the imperialist lies of Jews leaving Iran. What is the next lie from the imperialist, right wing going to be- that many Jews emigrated from Germany in the 1930s?
 

Commissar Pupovich

Welcome to the People's Cube Comrade Smooth Stone. Here is your shovel so you may begin digging for progress! The Party will issue you your opinions as needed.

Thank you Commissar. Shoveling snow is a fact of life in colder parts of the world as my imprisoned comrades have told me. I, however, will use it to shovel the bullshit thrown at us by arabists and left wing nutcases. Besides, the shovel is what the revolution will be fought with after the libtards take away our guns, so, I really am very grateful.
 

Smooth Stone

Thank you Commissar. Shoveling snow is a fact of life in colder parts of the world as my imprisoned comrades have told me. I, however, will use it to shovel the bullshit thrown at us by Arabists. Besides, the shovel is what the revolution will be fought with after the libtards take away our guns, so, I really am very grateful.

You will find the shovel is quite useful in many areas besides for your beet and potato allotment.

Be sure to check out Three Perfect Tools.

In fact, we define the shovel and it's many uses comrade:

A symbol of suffering and sacrifice for The Greater Good™. Used in hard labor therapy or in self-criticism sessions to redeem potential thought crimes. Every citizen must keep his or her shovel in good repair at all times and bring it to the railroad station if called to duty by the Commissar. The shovel is an important part of Earth Day festival, or Sacrificial Earth Shoveling Day, celebrating the death and rebirth of Great Lenin.
 

Comrades, I am proud to present one of our useful idiots for your diversity training.



As it happens, SMERSH recently received a belated Christmas video from a well known terrorist.


 

RedtheProgressiveFox

Great Stalin's Ghost

I understand my dogs would be safe from violation because dogs are haram, right?

Maybe safe from violation, but not "safe" comrade. For you see comrade, while the prophet Mohammed was having spasms and spitting out gibberish that only could be interpreted by him at a later date, declared that since dogs and cats are unclean, they were to be killed. Maybe you already knew that, but Fido will have to get in line with the rest of the family unit to his his had chopped off as well.

Brave dogs that they are, I will never have to worry about them accepting Islam at gunpoint or talking about how noble and decent their captors are . . . if it ever comes to that, because as we all know it's merely a tiny, miniscule, infitesimal, hardly worth mentioning in polite company minority of extremists who etc.
 

Commissar Pupovich

Smooth Stone

Thank you Commissar. Shoveling snow is a fact of life in colder parts of the world as my imprisoned comrades have told me. I, however, will use it to shovel the bullshit thrown at us by Arabists. Besides, the shovel is what the revolution will be fought with after the libtards take away our guns, so, I really am very grateful.

You will find the shovel is quite useful in many areas besides for your beet and potato allotment.

Be sure to check out Three Perfect Tools.

Commissar Pupovich with no disrespect for you and Premier Betty the Guillotine seems much to much like a Compassionate Conservative tool. I believe in these ever changing times the ACLU would prefer the advancement of this tool for the relinquishing of ones head. CIA, ISI, and Al Qaeda approved.


 

Commissar Pupovich

Comrades, I am proud to present one of our useful idiots for your diversity training.





Before I ran the Video I thought it was Karen Carpenter or Mary-Kate Olsen! Is that wrong?
 

Comrad Bubalasky

Commissar Pupovich with no disrespect for you and Premier Betty the Guillotine seems much to much like a Compassionate Conservative tool. I believe in these ever changing times the ACLU would prefer the advancement of this tool for the relinquishing of ones head. CIA, ISI, and Al Quida approved. http://www.janes.com/security/international_security/news/misc/janes011001_1_n.shtml




This weapon could also be used to humanely and painlessly pierce one's skull, out of which their brains are humanely and painlessly suctioned.

Also:

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/3/23/204619/503

See? Papa Stalin DID know best!
 

SLIENCE I KEEEL YOU.........
Just goes to show you can fool some of the people some of the time. Maybe this usefull idiot is a cubist plant?
 

Commissar Pupovich

Smooth Stone

Thank you Commissar. Shoveling snow is a fact of life in colder parts of the world as my imprisoned comrades have told me. I, however, will use it to shovel the bullshit thrown at us by Arabists. Besides, the shovel is what the revolution will be fought with after the libtards take away our guns, so, I really am very grateful.

You will find the shovel is quite useful in many areas besides for your beet and potato allotment.

Be sure to check out Three Perfect Tools.

In fact, we define the shovel and it's many uses comrade:

A symbol of suffering and sacrifice for The Greater Good™. Used in hard labor therapy or in self-criticism sessions to redeem potential thought crimes. Every citizen must keep his or her shovel in good repair at all times and bring it to the railroad station if called to duty by the Commissar. The shovel is an important part of Earth Day festival, or Sacrificial Earth Shoveling Day, celebrating the death and rebirth of Great Lenin.

Ah yes, thank you for the list of those perfect tools. May I kindly add that the shovel is also famous for its acting, even though some critics have accused it of somtimes being too stiff. Did you know that this same shovel was hired to appear in The Sopranos and Blood Simple, with a breakthrough Oscar winning performance in Rear Window. The shovel protested and refused to leave its home in a fit of jealousy when a more harrowing murder weapon was chosen to appear in No Country For Old Men. Jealousy is a frequent side effect of competition, but a competitive spirit is exactly what is wrong with capitalism, am I not right?
 

Commissarka Pinkie

Comrad Bubalasky

Commissar Pupovich with no disrespect for you and Premier Betty the Guillotine seems much to much like a Compassionate Conservative tool. I believe in these ever changing times the ACLU would prefer the advancement of this tool for the relinquishing of ones head

Alas Commissarka, I have no problem with your assessment. However, the guillotine is still a Party approved tool, so until that changes.... Of course, should the Party see fit to promote this loyal canine to Vice Chairman to carry on the work of the Party for those unfortunate, yet all too frequent extended absences of the Chairman, then perhaps I would have a greater voice among equals to make such an adjustment.
 

Smooth Stone

May I kindly add that the shovel is also famous for its acting, even though some critics have accused it of somtimes being too stiff. Did you know that this same shovel was hired to appear in The Sopranos and Blood Simple, with a breakthrough Oscar winning performance in Rear Window. The shovel protested and refused to leave its home in a fit of jealousy when a more harrowing murder weapon was chosen to appear in No Country For Old Men. Jealousy is a frequent side effect of competition, but a competitive spirit is exactly what is wrong with capitalism, am I not right?

This is the ultimate true use of the shovel... here are two truth seeking proles seeking the People's Cube!

Sadly, due to security concerns, they prefer to not be embedded. Clearly concerned they would be accused of being associated with capitalists.

Seeking the Cube
 

Quote:

"Commissarka Pinkie

This weapon could also be used to humanely and painlessly pierce one's skull, out of which their brains are humanely and painlessly suctioned.

Also:

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/3/23/204619/503

See? Papa Stalin DID know best!

As a teen in High School I once pithed a frog. Never really thought about applying that and an Oreck or Hoover together; However, I am open for new alternatives of death and torture, such as the website you posted.
 

The People's is not the only cube. And novel way to deal with it.


http://www.thedissidentfrogman.com/blog/link/we-must-destroy-the-cube/
 

ROFL, IRAN, WTF? GLOTR, yaNOOBS!
 

Comrades, here is another instructional video for our middle eastern comrades. This one shows the inherent wisdom of the dar al-Islam and the self-destroying greed of the capitalistic dar al-Harb.

 

Nice sword Hasan is wielding!
 

Laika just sent a signal to our tinfoil hat to photoshop this:


 

Active Measures Bureau

The People's is not the only cube. And novel way to deal with it.


http://www.thedissidentfrogman.com/blog/link/we-must-destroy-the-cube/

Destroy the Cube??? What are you? Some Bushitler hitbot?? The Peoples Cube can never be destroyed!
 

AbecedariusRex

Comrades, here is another instructional video for our middle eastern comrades. This one shows the inherent wisdom of the dar al-Islam and the self-destroying greed of the capitalistic dar al-Harb.

Comrade Abecedarius Rex, I doubt the Chairman will like his portrayal as a duck.....
 

Commissar Pupovich

AbecedariusRex

Comrades, here is another instructional video for our middle eastern comrades. This one shows the inherent wisdom of the dar al-Islam and the self-destroying greed of the capitalistic dar al-Harb.

Comrade Abecedarius Rex, I doubt the Chairman will like his portrayal as a duck.....

You misunderstand, comrade; the duck is not the Chairman, the duck is the Bushitler; the rabbit is the chairman. Note the disdain for worldly goods, the svelt figure, the ability to transform the earth rapidly... that is the Chairman, comrade. The duck is a goober, slobbery, dark; just like the Bushitler and his capitalist Halliburtoncronies. After all, I live by the maxim "A duck for a f**k, a f**k for a duck, f**ked up duck and 20 bucks!" (I don't know what it means but it has guided my life all these years living in the free socialist republic of Minnesocold.)
 

Comrad Bubalasky

Nice sword Hasan is wielding!

My favorite line (from childhood)? "Hasan Chop!"

... kind of reminds me of other catchy phrases like "death to the infidel", "murder the Jews", "offenders against Islam die" and other pithy sayings.
 

Commissarka Pinkie

Also:

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/3/23/204619/503

See? Papa Stalin DID know best!

OMFG!
On a scale of 0-10, 0 being a bad death and 10 being hte best, starving to death is an 8.
Here is the L.A Times Story and I post it below the fold for you as well. I apologize if this was already posted, I hunted and didn't see it. This needs to get out for I think that the vast majority of people thatare somewhat against the trend on this case, are feeling that waybecause they feel that starving to death is cruel. It's just not so.

Okay, so maybe some of the folks at DailyfuckingKos ought to do some investigative research and test that 8 out of 10 theory. Maybe they ought to be allowed one dirty beet a day. And maybe if they start to crack and beg for something to drink, they could see whether being shot is fun too!
Crikey.
 

AbecedariusRex

Note the disdain for worldly goods, the svelt figure, the ability to transform the earth rapidly... that is the Chairman, comrade.

Disdain for worldly goods? The Chairman? Whose shovel you trying to pull Comrade?
 

AbecedariusRex

On a scale of 0-10, 0 being a bad death and 10 being hte best, starving to death is an 8.

I am not so sure that is entirely all that in error though I agree the idiots at Daily Kooks and their reasons for saying that are as usual, ignorant. OK, I was on a tube for a long time, but really didn't want the feedings most of the time. I couldn't even stand water for a long time, only ice chips. Of course I really wasn't starving, but I sort of understand the idea that the body does have a way of doing that. Even when tastes starting coming back, I could only stand eating but a little. Lost a hundred pounds over about 4 or 5 months.
 

At 4:30 of this islamophobic propaganda video, you will see that Muslims mistaking humor for reality is not a recent phenomenon.


 

"This fort unfair to Arabs..."

Seems they also foresaw our Progressive Party as well comrade. Porky the Pig in Arabia.... does it get any more hate crime than this?
 

Comrad Bubalasky

Before I ran the Video I thought it was Karen Carpenter or Mary-Kate Olsen! Is that wrong?




Naw!

Besides, Achmed the Dead Terrorist has a bit more meat on his bones.

--
 

Red Square

With any luck you will soon begin to understand even the MasterCard "priceless" jokes, such as this one:

• Financing a phony show of support for Iran's nuclear program - one million rials.
• Running a government propaganda website - ten million rials.
• Being pwned by the People's Cube because you posted their send-up of your own stupid spin - PRICELESS!!!

ROTFLMAO!!!!

*wiping away tears of laughter!!!*

--
ZB
 

Commissar Pupovich

Active Measures Bureau

The People's is not the only cube. And novel way to deal with it.


http://www.thedissidentfrogman.com/blog/link/we-must-destroy-the-cube/

Destroy the Cube??? What are you? Some Bushitler hitbot?? The Peoples Cube can never be destroyed!

Commissar Pupovich, please look at the video. It does not suggest destroying the People's Cube but the cube at Mecca.
 

I knew that cube was the "holy" cube of Mecca....Life imitates the People's Cube! The People's Cube was from the beginning,
 

Active Measures Bureau

Commissar Pupovich

Active Measures Bureau

The People's is not the only cube. And novel way to deal with it.


http://www.thedissidentfrogman.com/blog ... -the-cube/

Destroy the Cube??? What are you? Some Bushitler hitbot?? The Peoples Cube can never be destroyed!

Commissar Pupovich, please look at the video. It does not suggest destroying the People's Cube but the cube at Mecca.

What??? Destroy the cube at Mecca?! That is both racially insensitive and non-tolerant of religious beliefs. What kind of Bureaucrat are you? Let’s see some ID? Ummmm? Come on, hand it over? I am waiting.



Comrade, while you are hopelessly looking for your ID, let me enlighten you on religion. The Muslims believe that it is part of their religion to kill us all, the end. We are supposed to let them exercise their right to worship their own way. It would be completely bigot of us to go and destroy something so precious to them just because they want to saw our heads off. So, if you want to be a good comrade, you will go to the local mosque with your family and let them rape you and your family while cutting off your head. Go on..... go do it....... If you do, then I will forget about the no-show with your "ID".
 

RedtheProgressiveFox

What??? Destroy the cube at Mecca?! That is both racially insensitive and non-tolerant of religious beliefs. What kind of Bureaucrat are you? Let’s see some ID? Ummmm? Come on, hand it over? I am waiting.

I am sure as Commissar of Robotics, that you noticed that those were not even unionized robots that were used to destroy the revered cube. They did not even conduct an Impact of the Environment study much less give time for a proper analysis on what said destruction would have on the economic and social aspects of these people. I suspect they were Haliburton robots!
 

According to a report from the MSM, the Iranian's are claiming to have cloned a sheep. Maybe this is one example that they can copy something and do it in a constructive manner.
 

Here I thought they had all the cloned sheep a country would need..... Often with bombs attached to them.
 

Commissar Pupovich

Here I thought they had all the cloned sheep a country would need..... Often with bombs attached to them.


Puhleez! They don't attach bombs to them! They clone the sheep purely for romantic purposes.

--
 

Comrade... have you forgotten they strap bombs on themselves for romantic reasons as well?
 

Hey!

Let's strap a bomb onto the Mime.... for romantic reasons, of course.

--
 

Zampolit Blokhayev

[Personal attack deleted]

So there.

-Mikhail (no, not Mikael!)
 

Commissar Pupovich

RedtheProgressiveFox

What??? Destroy the cube at Mecca?! That is both racially insensitive and non-tolerant of religious beliefs. What kind of Bureaucrat are you? Let’s see some ID? Ummmm? Come on, hand it over? I am waiting.

I am sure as Commissar of Robotics, that you noticed that those were not even unionized robots that were used to destroy the revered cube. They did not even conduct an Impact of the Environment study much less give time for a proper analysis on what said destruction would have on the economic and social aspects of these people. I suspect they were Haliburton robots!

Quite right comrade. This was one of the tipping points for me when I realized that this "Bureaucrat" is not what he says he is.

It is my suspicion that they are indeed either Halliburton robots or robots that belong to some sort of other corporation. Only the private sector would be capable of building stealing (from the people of course) such advanced technologies. These "robots", sadly, are hundreds of years more advanced than our own. Maybe if some party members did not pull party funding to my projects (*cough* *cough* Chairman), we would be a bit closer. Just keep in mind Comrade Pup, this is not what we will tell populace, no, our media will tell the people that the kapitalist stole such technologies from us.

Comrades, I have studied these beings. I felt that it was my obligation to because of my position. I reviewed the movie a day after it came out and rented it once it came to the kapitalist DVD. These are powerful machines that believe that the human race has both "good" in their hearts (whatever that is) and that the human race has great potential. This makes them very dangerous as it seems that they have more common sense in their semiconductors than millions of faithful useful idiots combined. If any members of the party find these "robots" or any parts that go with them, please send a transmission to my office. I will rush the paperwork so that it will only take 6 months to get through the system instead of the regular 3 years.
 

Zampolit Blokhayev

Commissar Pupovich

Here I thought they had all the cloned sheep a country would need..... Often with bombs attached to them.


Puhleez! They don't attach bombs to them! They clone the sheep purely for romantic purposes.

--

That is the only thing that I can see a comrade could do with a cloned sheep. I mean, come on, those things are how expensive to clone? Unless one is just most stupid than a useful idot, one is not going to go out and clone a sheep and then blow it up. You cannot eat it either, unless you want to pay something along the lines of thousands of dollars a pound (uh, oh, we may have just tripped upon a new cusine for the Chairman to try).
 

There have been many great posts on the Internet about this story with links to the Cube, but I'd like to quote this one because it gives it a new angle:

Tim Gleason

One of the problems that countries without a free press run into is that they don't recognize parody and satire. This isn't the first time something like this has happened. For example, in one famous incident Beijing China's largest newspaper, the Beijing Evening News, fell victim to a similar mistake. It copied an article from The Onionwhich stated that the U.S. Congress was threatening to leave Washington D.C. for Memphis or Charlotte unless Washington built them a new Capitol with a retractable dome. You can check out a report of this incident here.

However, I have to say that the current situation with Press TV is even better.When the target of a satire or parody can't even recognize it as satire or parody, it just makes the original satire better.
Speaking of not recognizing parody and satire, I must mention that Russian news sources have quoted American Bush-hating "satirists" in earnest, presenting their jokes about W's alleged stupidity, ignorance, and blood lust as true facts, thus contributing to the self-perpetuating mythology. Think about it the next time anyone mentions the "squandered credibility" of this administration and asks the question de jour "Why do they hate us so around the world?"

Speaking of the targets of satire not recognizing it as satire, we get that a lot in the American "progressives" as well. We were often misrepresented in the times of the Communists For Kerry campaign. The most vivid example was when Time Magazine published a photo of our parody placard in its Ann Coulter issue, attributing the message to the real Coulter-haters. More on this here.



Granted, the leftist protesters' dead-serious grotesque absurdness is often so ridiculous that the line between them and a parody becomes very thin. If that were not enough, they never stop pushing even further into the parody territory.

Not being able to recognize a satire directed at them is symptomatic of the irrational worldview in which no absolute standards exist. The Western "progressives" and their Islamofascist brethren both suffer from the same symptoms because they share the same disease - irrational worldview with the subsequent lack of moral and intellectual standards that might help them to distinguish truth from fiction.
 

Off Topic: The Death Star was an Inside Job!


 

I think it would be funny to have that Iranian with a sign that says, "I have no idea how to use Google."
 

Ahhhh... back from my touring of the great factories of the masses. Sorry to be away so long.

The Cube is truly a Global Progressive Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All will worship the People's Cube and the Party who represents it!!!!!!!

All Iranian useful idiots are belong to us!
 

New pictures added to the bottom of the main story.
 

Brilliant Red Square!!!

So much work you have done for our comrades in Iran for use against the evil American Imperialist Zionist Capitalist Hegemonist, Christianists (how many 'ists' can one put in a name?)!

You do more in one afternoon than 50 Iranian "information ministry" workers do in a month!!!
 

Quote:

Also, I'm now receiving emails from people who ask me what "PWN" means. Here's the explanation


Thank You, O Carmine repository of the People's Wisdom. I have wondered what the Mythical Judeo-Christian Post-Corporeal Punishment Place "pwned" means for quite some time.
 

/1D30 G4M35 4ND 73H 1N73RN37 H4/3 D0N3 50 MUCH 70 54P3 M0D3RN 50C137Y 7H47 UNL355 Y0U 4R3 4 G4M3R, Y0U C4N 3451LY G37 L057.
 

Quote:

/1D30 G4M35 4ND 73H 1N73RN37 H4/3 D0N3 50 MUCH 70 54P3 M0D3RN 50C137Y 7H47 UNL355 Y0U 4R3 4 G4M3R, Y0U C4N 3451LY G37 L057.


Uhhh...THX387?
 

I believe the Premier is responding to this from the Kommissar of Wild Life and Robotics:

If any members of the party find these "robots" or any parts that go with them, please send a transmission to my office. I will rush the paperwork so that it will only take 6 months to get through the system instead of the regular 3 years.

Then again, that may just be the last spasms of a booze and drug fueled hangover brought on by some hideous outpouring of human warmth and giving, Lenin help me, I could hardly type that, brought on by the recent "holiday."
 

L337
 

Lenin help me.... I don't want to know what the other symbols stand for! They look suspiciously like some code the Bushitler uses!
 

Arrrgh!!! Leetspeak!!! Make it stop!!!

--
 

I think Premier Betty may have come up with a new People's Math equation for tallying the New Hampshire vote...and not a moment to soon.
 

7H3R3 15 N07H1NG WR0NG W17H L3375P34K!

4ND N0, M47H 5H0ULD N07 B3 1N/0L/3D W17H L337 B3C4U53 M47H M4k35 MY H34D HUR7.
 

L3N1N H3LP M3!

1 7H1NK 1 4M 574R71NG 70 UND3R74ND!
 

Y35! Y35!!

L37 73H L337 1N70 Y0UR H34R7 4ND B3 CL34N53D BY 17!

R3P347 4F73R M3:

L337 G00D...
L337 G00D...
L337 G00D....
 

M4K3 73H L337 570P!!! 1T'5 M4K1NG MY H34D HUR7!!!

HMMMM.... 1 W4ND3R, 15 TH3R3 L337 F0R RU5514N?

--
BL0KH4Y3/
 

Testing....

7H3 3MPR355 M4Y L053