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A SLOBBERING LOVE AFFAIR!

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The thought criminal and agitator known as Nonperson Goldberg has written another screed that is pure blasphemy against the O'ly Obamessiah and besmirches the reputation of the First Canine. I recommend that we dispatch SMO immediately to give Nonperson G a limo ride to the beach and a free pair of new "shoes."

A Slobbering Love Affair: The True (And Pathetic) Story of the Torrid Romance Between Barack Obama and the Mainstream Media

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Dr. Strangelove
Direktor of Flashing Lights, Shiny Things, Bobbles, and Cinematography
Ministry of Agitprop
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room."

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Please let me have him. Even the most seemingly hopeless thought criminal can be brought to love Big Brother. Arbeit Macht Frei.

-OV

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Comrade Vodkavich,

Report directly to SMO and await her instructions. You will learn a thing or two from her, and a warning: at all times in her presence, watch your back!

Dr. S

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WILCO. And thanks for the heads up, Comrade Strangelove. I was a bit concerned about her broom, but hearing it from you, I'll know to be EXTREMELY concerned about her broom.

*BREAK BREAK*

Comrade SMO, I humbly stand by for your knowledge and orders.

-OV


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Here is an author we let slip between our hands. I must say, let us not make the same mistake again. I may be new to the Inner Party, but even I know who we should and shouldn't let go. Let us get him!

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Indeed, Esteemed Doctor. I shall beware the nail gun. Though I must admit a certain tingle in my leg resulting from her various missives. Pray tell, does she own a pig farm?

-OV



 
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