Beet of the Week Canceled Due to Sequestration

3/6/2013, 3:40 pm

My fellow comrades:

It is with a heavy heart that I must hereby announce the cancellation of Pinkie's prestigious Beet of the Week Awards Program™ due to the effects of Sequestration.

It has not been suspended. It has not been delayed. It has not been postponed. It is not even on hiatus for retooling.

It has been CANCELED!

Nominations can no longer be accepted. Any nominations already under submission cannot and will not be considered. Nominations may not be resubmitted until further notice.

But worse than that, thousands will now be out of work. Yes, thousands! The thousands who made the bumper stickers. The thousands who printed up the nomination forms. And the one whose only job, his only means of support for himself and his dog and his mother, was filling out the nomination forms and submitting them to me. I speak, of course, of Superkommissar Maksim.

I can't possibly continue to employ him and all these others and still collect my annual six-figure salary with all its perks and benefits, to include my Cadillac known as the Pinkiemobile and chauffeur Pedro, whose countless friends and relations back in Mexico depend on the wages I pay him just to survive.

Comrades, this is the hardest decision I've ever had to make. Since the Sequestration took effect at midnight last Friday, I've worked harder and harder than I've ever worked at anything in my life to come up with a way to save BOTW, but no matter what or how I cut or cook or crunch, I find it is impossible, utterly impossible to do so without increased funding.

We simply cannot be expected to effectively and efficiently maintain this program and continue the consistently high level of service that members of the Cube collective have come to expect since the award's inception in 2008, at 2007 spending levels! We absolutely must have increased funding at 2013 levels to remain current and relevant, and also because it's, well, 2013!

But since the Republicans are only interested in giving more unnecessary tax breaks we can't afford to their wealthy fat cat friends and corporate jet owner pals, instead of funding a program that's improved and empowered the lives of so many with its unparalleled recognition of the most Progressive in Progressive thought and expression, we have no choice now but to cancel it altogether.

That means no more Beet of the Week award:

And no more bumper sticker:

As for the “Reserved for Beet of the Week” parking space in front of Party headquarters, we have just enough money left to replace it with a nice piece of granite boasting a bronze plaque that will memorialize the purloined right, the stolen entitlement, the looted national treasure that was once Beet of the Week.

-------------
Commissarka Pinkie is a regular contributor to The People's Cube, and is renowned and admired by the masses for her dedication to raising awareness of how much she cares. When she isn't busy making an issue out of everything or beating unruly proles with her shovel, she enjoys spending other people's money, occupying other people's property, and playing victim and moral authority cards.

3/6/2013, 3:53 pm

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Those blasted Republicans ruin everything! How will the Proletariat triumph over the oppression of Capitalism without the necessary encouragement of the Beet of the Week? Tell me!

3/6/2013, 4:36 pm

Gee, all of that because ten dollars was cut from the millions of dollars in the funding increase of millions for a BOTW budget of billions that is already more than most countries spend on national defense.

You commies.

3/6/2013, 4:42 pm

Oh Commissarka!

This must be so hard for you! Poor thing.

This is just fine news, coinciding with when I started posting posts without videos, as you "recommended."

Is this "fair™" when every equal one deserves a Beet of the Week?

I don't think so.

Word will get out that you are just manipulating us!

One of my greatest dreams was getting the coveted "Beet of the Week."

Now, I am hopeless! Thanks alot GW Bush! Hope you're happy!

3/6/2013, 5:13 pm

Dear Pinkie - don't worry! Organizing for Action is on the case! I have just received this email from OFA at BarackObama.com and it basically restates your message. And even though they don't mention BOTW by name, I'm sure it's among the programs that they are fighting for on your behalf!

Comrade Red Square--

Thanks to Republican obstructionism in Congress, the nation was forced into the sequester last Friday -- a series of automatic and destructive budgets cuts that you and your neighbors are just beginning to feel.

In the face of these devastating cuts, House Speaker John Boehner went on TV and said, "I don't know whether it's going to hurt the economy or not ... I don't think anyone quite understands how the sequester is really going to work."

Really? We're not talking about some abstract numbers on a piece of paper -- this is real.

The sequester will cut 10,000 teaching jobs, 70,000 spots for preschoolers in Head Start, $43 million for food programs for seniors, $35 million for local fire departments, and access to nutrition assistance for over half a million women and their families.

And the reason congressional Republicans let these cuts go into effect is because they simply wouldn't support closing tax loopholes for millionaires and billionaires -- for things like yachts and corporate jets. I wish I were kidding.

More than 340,000 OFA supporters have added their names to support President Obama's balanced plan and call on congressional Republicans to take action to stop the sequester budget cuts right now.

Add your name, Comrade Red Square, and join them:

https://my.barackobama.com/Tell-the-GOP-to-Act

Thanks, and keep it up.

Stephanie

-----Original Message-----
From: Jon Carson, BarackObama.com
Subject: Devastating

Friend --

Today, because congressional Republicans refused to act, devastating budget cuts known as the sequester are going into effect.

They're self-inflicted wounds, and they didn't have to happen.

Congress can stop all of this right away -- and pursue a balanced approach to deficit reduction.

That's what the vast majority of Americans want, and yesterday, more than 100,000 Americans called on Congress to be reasonable about the budget.

Add your name now:

https://my.barackobama.com/Tell-the-GOP-to-Act

Thanks,

Jon

-----Original Message-----
From: Jim Messina, BarackObama.com
Subject: Stand behind the President's plan, before tomorrow

Friend --

Brace yourself.

If congressional Republicans don't act by tomorrow, we're going to be hit by a series of devastating, automatic budget cuts called the sequester.

It's a sledgehammer to the budget, our economy, and millions of Americans across the country -- and the most frustrating part? It doesn't have to happen.

The majority of Americans support President Obama's balanced approach to deficit reduction -- add your name if you do, too.

So far, congressional Republicans are refusing to compromise -- all because they don't want to close tax loopholes for millionaires, billionaires, vacation homes, and corporate jets. Seriously.

This has very real consequences.

On the chopping block are 10,000 teaching jobs, more than 70,000 kids' spots in Head Start, $35 million for local fire departments, $43 million to make sure seniors don't go hungry, and access to nutrition assistance for 600,000 women and their families. That's just a few of the things we'll lose.

President Obama has put forth a balanced deficit reduction plan with smart spending cuts that protect the critical investments needed to strengthen middle-class families and our economy.

We need to send a strong signal about where Americans stand on this issue.

Add your name today:

https://my.barackobama.com/Tell-the-GOP-to-Act

Thanks,

Messina

Jim Messina
Chair
Organizing for Action

P.S. -- If Congress fails to act, this fight doesn't end tomorrow. We'll need to put even more pressure on Republicans to stop these budget cuts and pass a balanced plan. Join this fight now.

Sources: The White House and Center for American Progress

----------------
Let's finish what we started. Chip in $25 or more to Organizing for Action, the grassroots movement that will get the job done.

3/6/2013, 5:15 pm

Those of us who have never won a Beet of the Week are hardest hit....

3/6/2013, 5:27 pm

Ivan Betinov wrote:Those of us who have never won a Beet of the Week are hardest hit....

Ditto here too, I'd at least accept some shovel whacking on occasion (or a good spanking at least). I think the game is rigged ... I thought everybody was supposed to win a trophy.

3/6/2013, 5:46 pm

The light is gone from my eyes, for I was ever hopeful to add the prestigious and coveted Beet of the Week to my Silver Shovel and four Heroes of Cubist Labor with bronze palm tree device. At least the Cube budget still allows $250,000,000 in foreign aid for the struggling Onion.

My heart goes out to the millions of handicapped minority kittens who will never grow up to see a Beet of the Week, and most of all my heart goes out to myself. My 75 footish likeness outside of my humble 200 room beachfront dacha will be draped in black until this blight of a sequester ends.

3/6/2013, 6:09 pm

I do not wish to be disrespectful but Pamalinsky and I are awash in beets and beet by-products. We welcome you to join us... Pamalinsky has all the specifics - please PM her.

3/6/2013, 6:14 pm

Comrade Putout,

Oy! The responsibility! It's Bush's fault!

3/6/2013, 7:29 pm

I suppose it goes without saying that the tours of the famous "Pink House" Beet Of The Week world headquarters are on the chopping block as well. I've been saving a thimble full of vodka from each month's allotment in order to sell an entire bottle's worth in order to fund my "once in a lifetime" trip....I suppose I should just go ahead and drink the kids' inheritance then?

3/6/2013, 8:04 pm

Any thoughts that the sequestration is anything short of a holocaust will not be tolerated.

Many are experiencing beet of the week withdrawal

3/6/2013, 9:04 pm

At Federal EBT card offices nationwide, drivers must jockey for position to get the best parking spaces now that Valet Parking service has been discontinued by underhanded Republican sequester tactics...

3/6/2013, 10:39 pm

Red Square wrote:Dear Pinkie - don't worry! Organizing for Action is on the case! I have just received this email from OFA at BarackObama.com and it basically restates your message. And even though they don't mention BOTW by name, I'm sure it's among the programs that they are fighting for on your behalf!

Comrade Red Square--

Thanks to Republican obstructionism in Congress, the nation was forced into the sequester last Friday....blahblahblahblah..etc...

Great Lenin's Ghost!

Now I understand why Pinkie talks like a twelve old, oh Obama!, what can we do about this vocabulary deficit of the people? As more equal and more equal grammar gets chosen as acceptable communication my 12 yr minus children become bigger and bigger intellectual prodigies... Poor Father Prog, he's on The List for sure!

(Ahem!) Ban the retter L today!!!

All good comrades must study the letters our faithful People's Director posted above for reference as how to communicate properly in today's world.. (especially if you don't have kids! of course then you may be one... ) off to jiffy lobo!

Ducks....

3/6/2013, 11:01 pm

3/6/2013, 11:11 pm

Infidel Castrate wrote:
I.M. Craptek wrote:

Here some beets ...

3/7/2013, 12:29 am

Reeducation camps have have tried to pick up some of the slack!

Their programs are called "Beat on the Weak".
A guest is chosen at random and beaten four hours! No violation of the rules required. This greatly assists prisoner morale. Got morale? If not your turn could be next for a beat on the weak!!!*
* Recovery times may vary, or their may be none at all!!!

3/7/2013, 12:59 am

Dear Pinkie,

Perhaps we could still afford a Radish of the Week Award?

Sincerely,

R.O.C.K.

3/7/2013, 2:12 am

What about the children and The Beet Farmers?

3/7/2013, 10:27 am

The One was right (though I never doubted): the end of the world is nigh ... unless taxes are raised on the evilfilthyrich.

3/7/2013, 10:46 am

3/7/2013, 11:12 am

Our grandkittens will listen to the songs from the time Before Sequestration (B.S.) and wonder what a beet was.

3/7/2013, 11:57 am

Indeed, Comrade Meow, indeed.

3/7/2013, 12:47 pm

I must denounce all of you for feeling down that you haven't won the beet of the week or even wanting to compete for the award! Comrades, competition is what the rethuglikkkans want you to be lured into! You must resist! If one receives the award, we should all receive the award, so I must denounce the award giver for not awarding the award to all of us deserving/undeserving the award.
Report to the train station with your shovel! First one there gets denounced again so go no faster nor slower than the other comrades!

3/7/2013, 1:18 pm

3/7/2013, 4:09 pm

We were counting on increased funding this year so we could divert more resources to raising public awareness of Beet of the Week, and especially youth outreach by turning the smiling, happy little beet into a full blown cartoon character.

We would have named him something totally unoriginal and painfully obvious like Billy Beet, then launched a whole line of t-shirts, bedding, plush toys, and lunch boxes featuring his adorable image. (Yeah, I know because of the federal free lunch program, kids don't necessarily carry lunch boxes anymore, but with increased funding to 2013 levels, we would've had money to make those lunch boxes anyway, and kids would've wanted them no matter what because it would've been cool to have one.)

With increased funding, we could've hired someone to dress up in a giant beet costume and raise further awareness of Beet of the Week through personal appearances at parties, fundraisers, rallies, protests, marches, sit-ins, lie-ins, die-ins, pee-ins, etc.

And as a beloved children's cartoon character, our Democrat allies in Congress could've trotted him out on the steps of Capitol Hill and proclaimed to all that Republicans wanted to see Billy Beet fired, killed, chopped up and cooked into borscht just so they could give more tax breaks to millionaires, billionaires, corporate jet owners and vacation home owners. (Why do you think the Obamas always rent their vacation homes? To avoid receiving a tax break they don't need! Now that's what I call caring!)

With Billy Beet, so many more hearts would've been in danger of breaking. So many more children would've cried and bawled and blubbered and pleaded with their parents to write or call their Congressional representatives to save Billy Beet and ultimately Beet of the Week!

Oh, how it grieves me to think of all the people who could've received Beet of the Week and now, never will! People who could've discovered the cure for cancer…who could've come up with a way to stop global warming…save the polar bears…stop world hunger…end homelessness…poverty…someone who might have saved the world, had they only been inspired and motivated by the award of Pinkie's prestigious Beet of the Week! Now, none of that will come to pass! For without the prospect of something glorious in it for you, what's the point of even getting out of bed in the afternoon and trying to do anything at all? What's the use of even caring if there's no way to call attention to how much you care? Why bother, if no one notices?

Does anyone care at all anymore?

Anyone?

Anyone at all?

3/7/2013, 4:27 pm

Dearest Pinkie, I care for the children. ™

3/7/2013, 4:28 pm

Pinkie, for unrivaled demagoguery in the service of corrupt commie crap, for marching lockstep with your leader into the churning sea of debt and oblivion, and for using what began as a tiny insignificant award program and using it to amass a personal fortune of billions and immense political power, to then cynically use the program you've been entrusted with as a hostage in a sick Machaevellian political power play, I hearby award you the prestigious

Commie of the Week

Unlike the BOTW award the Commie of the Week award does't cost the nation billions of dollars to administer. To recieve your award, commie, just send ten dollars for postage and handling to Halliburton Awards Group, inc. and within ten to thirty business days you will recieve your commie award suitable for framing.

3/7/2013, 4:33 pm

I feel a WHACK! coming on...

3/7/2013, 4:34 pm

But then again, there's nothing wrong with "unrivaled demagoguery in the service of corrupt commie crap, marching lockstep with your leader into the churning sea of debt and oblivion, and using what began as a tiny insignificant award program and using it to amass a personal fortune of billions and immense political power".

So never mind.

3/7/2013, 5:34 pm

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:
Does anyone care at all anymore?

Anyone?

Anyone at all?

Look! Up in the sky!!!

Comrade Putout wrote:
...and this is not who you think it is!

3/7/2013, 5:51 pm

Com. Pinkie,

I am beet day in and day. out, twice on weekends.

3/7/2013, 5:56 pm

This news has finally pushed me over the edge. No Beet of the Week?
I am going to have to make a decision, unless a bureaucrat can do it for me, on how to handle this additional burden put on me by the damn rethugs and their castration sequestration BS.

3/7/2013, 5:57 pm

I'VE LOST MY JOB??? Am I to survive only on public assistance, bribes, and my black-market business selling misplaced government surplus and Cuban cigars? How can this be? Not to mention, I was so close to receiving my 1000th BOTW award. Oh dear Lenin how I pray we win back the House in 2014.

Those lamenting losing the chance to ever win a BOTW, I must remind you that just as Hugo Chavez's billions belong to the people of Venezuela all of my BOTW awards belong to the people of the Cube. I am but just the caretaker. Now BACK the F*CK UP!

On a brighter note at lest the Whitehouse calligraphers still have their jobs.

3/7/2013, 6:08 pm

"Bless the Beets and the Children™ "

3/7/2013, 6:08 pm

3/8/2013, 12:20 am

The Beetles[attachment=0]The_Beetles.jpg[/attachment]

3/8/2013, 12:41 am

3/8/2013, 3:53 am

Proud Supporter of Billy Beet....

... and other atrocities...

3/8/2013, 8:55 am

We should create "Betty Beet" so that she and her significant other, say, "Rebekah Radish" or "Sandra Squash" or some such thing could be used as poster children to illustrate ongoing oppression. Think of the opportunities: we not only get to demonstrate once again how Republicans hate Children, but also never miss a chance to wage war on women and give vent to their raging homophobia.

3/8/2013, 9:02 am

$.$. Halliburton wrote:Pinkie, for unrivaled demagoguery in the service of corrupt commie crap, for marching lockstep with your leader into the churning sea of debt and oblivion, and for using what began as a tiny insignificant award program and using it to amass a personal fortune of billions and immense political power, to then cynically use the program you've been entrusted with as a hostage in a sick Machaevellian political power play, I hearby award you the prestigious

Commie of the Week

Unlike the BOTW award the Commie of the Week award does't cost the nation billions of dollars to administer. To recieve your award, commie, just send ten dollars for postage and handling to Halliburton Awards Group, inc. and within ten to thirty business days you will recieve your commie award suitable for framing.

Well! If caring about the downtrodden makes me a Commie, then I'm proud to be a Commie! If raising awareness of how much I care makes me a Commie, then I'm proud to be a Commie! If making an issue out of everything in the name of calling attention to how much I care about the downtrodden makes me a Commie, then I'm proud to be a Commie! If instituting a program that brings just a little ray of sunshine into the wretched, miserable, humdrum lives of the masses and makes just one person feel good about themselves--even if that one person happens to be me--makes me a Commie, THEN I'M PROUD TO BE A COMMIE!

But pay money for your stupid, smelly award when you're already awash in money made from the blood and sweat of the very masses who I fight for day after day with my little grass roots initiative that was BOTW? How dare you!

I don't pay for anything, buster, especially for something I'm entitled to. That's what the government is for.

You know where you can stick your dumb award, and if that's too painful for you, then grease it with some of that oil you stole.

You disgust me.

3/8/2013, 9:07 am

Komissar Blogunov wrote:
We should create "Betty Beet" so that she and her significant other, say, "Rebekah Radish" or "Sandra Squash" or some such thing could be used as poster children to illustrate ongoing oppression. Think of the opportunities: we not only get to demonstrate once again how Republicans hate Children, but also never miss a chance to wage war on women and give vent to their raging homophobia.

Blogunov, that's a great idea! Betty Beet and Rebekah Radish could've been someone's two mommies. Sandra Squash needs free birth control and can't possibly be expected to buy it cheap at Wal-Mart because their workers aren't unionized.

I'd give you Beet of the Week for this idea, except...well...no more funding!

Maybe if we had a Pledge Drive like PBS?

3/8/2013, 10:18 am

Commissarka - it pays to have friends in high places.

3/8/2013, 11:56 am

I denounce myself for craving a Beet of the Week!

3/8/2013, 1:44 pm

Iscthis a photo of a 'beet surprise'?

Comrade Putout wrote:I denounce myself for craving a Beet of the Week!

i-need-a-BOTW.jpg

3/8/2013, 5:49 pm

Comrade climber, this being the Cube, you need to alter your perspective.

Beet suprise is more like beet-envy...

In the interest of redistribution (for the People™ ), someone is just going to have to SHARE their "family beets" with Comrade Putout.

I'm distilling changing the fluids in the People's tractor this evening, or I'd do it myself.

3/8/2013, 6:35 pm

3/8/2013, 7:24 pm

Kommisar Kaputnik wrote:I must denounce all of you for feeling down that you haven't won the beet of the week or even wanting to compete for the award! Comrades, competition is what the rethuglikkkans want you to be lured into! You must resist! If one receives the award, we should all receive the award, so I must denounce the award giver for not awarding the award to all of us deserving/undeserving the award.
Report to the train station with your shovel! First one there gets denounced again so go no faster nor slower than the other comrades!

Kommisar Kaputnik, you might be new here, but that's no excuse. No one--but NO ONE--ever denounces me and walks away on their own two feet. They might crawl away on all fours, groaning and leaving a trail of blood and teeth and who knows what else in their wake, but they never walk away from me.

WHACK!!!

Fortunately, sequestration did not take away my shovel.

You'll also note that no one else here warned you of the consequences of denouncing Commissarka Pinkie. That should teach you to henceforth confine your denouncements to those of your own lowly stature.

3/8/2013, 8:06 pm

Attaboy Comrade Kaputnik! Welcome to the collective!

You have now been officially indoctrinated by the Cube's own version of the hospitality comittee... the swelling will go down in about three days.

3/8/2013, 11:25 pm

Tovarichi wrote:Comrade climber, this being the Cube, you need to alter your perspective.

Beet surprise is more like beet-envy...

In the interest of redistribution (for the People™), someone is just going to have to SHARE their "family beets" with Comrade Putout.

I'm distilling changing the fluids in the People's tractor this evening, or I'd do it myself.

3/9/2013, 12:21 am

I believe Comrade Ivan Betinov has the evening free...Don't let the jar fool you, he could probably "stir your borcht" if you know what I mean (wink wink nudge nudge) but then again, Comrade Krasnodar (who has been strangely missing in action of late) has that spoon...

3/9/2013, 12:55 am

wrong lyrics....whew!

3/9/2013, 2:05 am

3/9/2013, 2:37 am

Comrade Putout wrote:

A-Ten-Hut !

The Marine Corpse Family Beets ™ at your service maam.

3/9/2013, 2:50 am

Okay Comrades! I don't know about you but, I've had enough!

And this is regarding the sequester. And the avoidance of the sequester by Dear Oleander, thereby constricting our dear Commissarka Pinkie's ability to dole out her most coveted Beet of the Week Award!

Where is the Fairness™, Comrades?

Okay, I admit I didn't originate this poster, I have no idea who produced it but, it perfectly expresses my disgust regarding this sequester matter.

YOU THREW THE BALL
Except you didn't. You only pretended to throw it. You let me chase after absolutely nothing for five hundred feet, or fifty feet, or five miles. I don't know. I'm not good at judging distances. I'm a dog. My point here is that YOU, sir, are a fucking asshole.

3/9/2013, 3:06 am

3/9/2013, 4:34 am

3/10/2013, 11:00 am

I just wanted to let you all know that Sgt. NeoTroll and I have become good 'Beet Buddies' and have not given up our fight to reestablish the Beet of the Week program.

Thank you for your service Sgt. NeoTroll!

3/10/2013, 3:41 pm

Comrade Putout wrote:I denounce myself for craving a Beet of the Week!

The attachment i-need-a-BOTW.jpg is no longer available

Sorry, I've been missing all the fun but those beets won't wait.

3/10/2013, 5:33 pm

ThePeoplesComrade wrote: Sorry, I've been missing all the fun but those beets won't wait.

I was just teasing you comrade!

BTW - How'd you get that guy to turn around in my/your last image?

Next thing you know you'll have him bent over!

I'm taking a few intimate pictures of myself as we speak.

I'd like to send them to you as a piece peace offering.

They'll be ready soon...

3/10/2013, 6:16 pm

May, may I offer you this highly sensitive photographic device to use in your photo shoot?

3/10/2013, 6:32 pm

We are not sure where Comrade Putout finds the people's images she uses. We have turned off the Kulak Filter and The Capitalist Pig Sequestration Purifier and still no such images ever reveal themselves during our travels. State Security (KGB) has formed an Image Apprehension Unit code named "May Pose" to investigate.

3/10/2013, 6:37 pm

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote: May, may I offer you this highly sensitive photographic device to use in your photo shoot?

3/10/2013, 6:41 pm

Thank you, dear People's Comrade,

I have already PM'd Comrade Putout about this. In a most friendly manner I may add. I was wondering if it was "just me." She has not answered me, which she usually does in a timely manner.

I support anyone's free expression but I do have my boundaries.

I stated them to her.

Nuf said.Oh, and she just uses my head and places it on characters she wishes to express. I ask, "Why me?"

3/10/2013, 7:26 pm

The Party does not judge morality or levels of individual tolerance (unless either interferes with production or state loyalty). We do however need to know where all images originate to protect the people against Western Decadence and Capitalistic Corruption.

It appears our infiltrator is quite old, possibly a Ronald Reagan associate.

PLEASE CLEAR THIS AREA IMMEDIATELY

[center]CAVITY SEARCH IN PROGRESS[/center]

3/10/2013, 7:31 pm

ThePeoplesComrade wrote:The Party does not judge morality or levels of individual tolerance (unless either interferes with production or state loyalty). We do however need to know where all images originate to protect the people against Western Decadence and Capitalistic Corruption.

image assassin.jpg

It appears our infiltrator is quite old, possibly a Ronald Reagan associate.

PLEASE CLEAR THIS AREA IMMEDIATELY
[center]CAVITY SEARCH IN PROGRESS[/center]

What?

3/10/2013, 11:20 pm

Comrade Pamalinsky, please bear (or bare) in mind that it is a great honor to have one's head or other body parts used by our dear Comrade Putout. You has a privilege!

3/11/2013, 12:18 am

So we (The Peoples Comrade and me) finally got this stupid copier to work properly and we have an excellent image of my butt!

Don't look at it if you are going to be offended!

Mystery item No. 1

3/11/2013, 1:14 am

Government Dependency: Okay, I'm out here on this ledge with you. Now what?

3/11/2013, 7:35 pm

Comrade Putout! Please, whatever you do, don't jump!

I am flattered by your use of my body parts! Really! Don't jump!

I do have my moments of repressive propriety however, I hope you can forgive me.

Besides, it's all Bush's fault anyway!

I am simpatico with your observation that many of Oleander's policies are indeed suicidal. But, let's not rush things. We need you to carry on the flame of "decadence."

I am in awe of your courage!

Your pal,
Pamalinsky

3/11/2013, 9:23 pm

3/11/2013, 10:17 pm

ThePeoplesComrade wrote:

PLEASE CLEAR THIS AREA IMMEDIATELY
[center]CAVITY SEARCH IN PROGRESS[/center]

Is OK Comrade, Obamacare covers that.

3/12/2013, 2:36 am

Comrade Putout wrote:I just wanted to let you all know that Sgt. NeoTroll and I have become good 'Beet Buddies' and have not given up our fight to reestablish the Beet of the Week program.

Thank you for your service Sgt. NeoTroll!

On behalf of myself and my platoon we are much obliged maam.

It was a pleasure pleasuring you showing you and Ms. Pamalinsky all our fine armaments and beets.

Seems one of the troops is not quite the same since you left, I think it was a first time experience for him.

And BTW, seems Ms. Pamalinsky left her electric toothbrush behind so please pass this on to her. Must come in handy after consuming so many beets.

3/12/2013, 6:56 am

Comrade Putout wrote:
diaphragm.jpg

Is it a diaphragm or a yamulke?By the way, Comrade, I would like to add my sentiments to Pamalimsky regarding your apparent suicidal thoughts. Surely you can at least wait till next Tuesday! And I will share with you something I overheard one of the doctors at my psych er say to us once ([img]images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img] for absolute real!!) : "...so I told him, don't tell me you're suicidal. Because if you tell me you're suicidal I will have to put you in our hospital. And I can promise you, our hospital will not give you the drugs you are looking for. Our drugs are not fun at all."

3/12/2013, 7:31 am

How fascinating, comrades. I, too, was once perched on a ledge, but like everything I do, it was to Raise Awareness:

https://thepeoplescube.com/peoples-blog ... t1830.html

Oddly enough, that's the same thread on which Beet of the Week was born.

3/13/2013, 2:39 am

*sniffle* Our Pinkie Perched... oh the memories... Commissarka Cares Courageously For The Children!

Re-Birth The BOTW NOW!!!

3/13/2013, 5:28 am

Sgt. NeoTroll wrote:
The Marine Corpse Family Beets ™ at your service maam.

full-metal-jacket-1987-08-g.jpg

Sgt. NeoTroll,

You showed how sequestration has led to such a shortage of uniforms that you're forced to force NumBeets to perform rifle-drills in their underwear, but you're so "old school," you didn't show how it's affected the WICs (who used to be called WAVES, a class of enlistment that served as a great recruitment tool for the Navy to enlist young men to become swabbies with dreams of riding the waves), so I've rummaged through YOUR locker to find photograhic evidence of the adverse effect of sequestration on rifle-drill training of WICs:

Sad for her, but lucky for you, it looks like Petraeus' Pattycake has been demoted from Army LtC to the bottom of the chain of command and transferred to Paris Island.

--KOOK

3/13/2013, 6:18 am

Eager to offset the adverse effects of sequetration on the military, our Commander-in-Chief has selflessly demoted himself to fill the gap created by the sequestration-caused shortage of drill sergeants since Sgt. Neo Troll's paycheck has now been earmarked for "Community Outreach" by Morsi's "Muslim Sisterhood" branch of the Egyptian military.

--KOOK

3/13/2013, 9:23 pm

Here are the culprits, Pinkie. Yes, I, Pamalinsky, an admitted YouTube addict, found them! See! I am good for something!

They are unabashedly taking your award away. A shameful abscondification!

I found them on the internet, and we all know the internet shows the truth in all things.

P.S. It's best to not quibble with silly things like actual spellings. Heh, heh, beat/beet. Relax about this sort of thing. You'll feel much better!

Perky Pamalinsky, signing off!

3/16/2013, 10:07 pm

A ONE-TIME DONATION

Click, then choose the amount

A MONTHLY DONATION

select a level of your attachment

Get in line at our People's State-Run Dry Goods Store #86

The People's Cube

Guaranteed equality of results for only $10 capitalist exploitation units

Hotel USSR

Shakedown Socialism

You've been counted, Thought Criminal #

A ONE-TIME
DONATION

A MONTHLY
DONATION