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Biden to Launch New Miss Information Beauty Pageant

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Washington, DC -- The White House has announced that President* Biden has signed an Executive Order creating a new global beauty pageant to judge how well TV news anchors, who identify as women, disseminate The Party's™ Current Truth™.

Nominees will be judged on their appeal to The People™, their ability to stay loyal to The Current Truth™ (despite attacks from Insurrectionist™, White Supremacists™ and other Fascist™, Far Right™, Terrorists™), and the smell of their hair.

Nominations for Miss Information USA are now open.

All nominations must be accompanied with an explanation of why the nominee qualifies as to appeal to The People™ and loyalty to The Current Truth™. The President* will adjudicate the final criterion.


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Most Equally Esteemed Komrads,

Colonel Obyezyana wrote:JOY REID
2020-07-21-MSNBC-TRO-ReidLies.jpg
Already the winner, no contest.

Joy Reid is right up there with Baghdad Bob.

I am fairly certain I dated Miss Information in High School. I also dated Miss Take, Miss Demeanor, Miss Guided, Miss Andry, Miss Calculation, and Miss Understanding. I probably left some of them out.

Getting around in the Current Truth ™,

Red Salmon

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No girls over the age of 12 are permitted. Swimsuit competitions will be mandatory. "Miss Information 2021" will be personally selected by Glorious President Biden and will receive a personal tour of the White House, two scoops of ice cream, and a shoulder rub.

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'pelipsky recommends Jen Psaki for title of Miss Information.

Jen Psaki is clearly eligible to wear the satin sash and bow in any pageant as Miss Information. It's a no-brainer and why do you even want to know in the first place winner.

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Perhaps "Rachel" Levine would be a strong contender. It doesn't even have to speak. Its very presence is misinformation.

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I'm nominating, posthumously, Helen Thomas. Just look at that beautiful deathly smile.

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If the dead can vote, the dead need to be represented.

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Red Salmon wrote:Most Equally Esteemed Komrads,

Joy Reid is right up there with Baghdad Bob.

I didn't know Bagdad Bob identified as a woman. The things you learn on The People's Cube.

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Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:I'm nominating, posthumously, Helen Thomas. Just look at that beautiful deathly smile.

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If the dead can vote, the dead need to be represented.

Helen Thomas is already Ms Formaldehyde. We need to redistribute awards equally equitably among all participants.

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it worked for Justice Ruth Bader-Ginsburg for years...

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Red Square wrote:
Helen Thomas is already Ms Formaldehyde. We need to redistribute awards equally equitably among all participants.

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Director Red Square, my apologies for this oversight. I was not aware that this award had been awarded. I've been a Party member since only 2014 (from memory). Apparently, and this is yet to be adjudicated, my re-education is not yet complete. Re-education is an on going process in The People's Cube. I never got to see the Centerfold. I'm sure it was unforgettable.

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Colonel Obyezyana wrote:JOY REID

Already the winner, no contest.

Miss_Information_Reid_Biden.jpg

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Hmmmm. Smells........knappy headed. I'm not joking.

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I must protest! PROTEST!
NO place on list for Chrissa Hayeski?

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This favorite: tavarishch Rakhyel Maddowskaya!

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(yet byetween us, komrades: tavarishch Formaldyekhid unbeatable, even post-mortyem)


 
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