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CNN Chooses New Logo On Eve Of Inauguration

1/20/2009, 8:46 am
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CNN Chooses New Logo on Eve of Inauguration

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In honor of today's historic inauguration, the fair and unbiased minions at CNN have decided to update their company logo in keeping up with the times and national sentiment.

Other changes in CNN company policy effective immediately include:

  • President Obama will be referred to as "Obama The Great, the merciful and beneficent " in official communications
  • President Bush will be referred to as "He who must not be named"
  • First Lady Michelle Obama will be referred to as Her Enlightened Royal Highness.
  • All stories which could cast the slightest pall over the luminous glory of Obama The Great, the merciful and beneficent will be squashed immediately.
  • No mention will be made of the $170 Million dollars spent on the Obama Coronation - instead, CNN will continue to focus on the $150,000.00 wardrobe of Sarah Palin.
  • All old news stories from 2005 complaining about Bush spending $40 million on his inauguration will be immediately cleansed from the CNN archives.
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1/19/2017, 9:56 pm
Finally CNN is becoming the awesome news service we all knew it could become under the leadership of Mr. Potato Head. When I see him I want to mash him up and make a batch of the people's vodka. He is truly inspiring and only has 10 years of KGB training. Ever since that evil JFK embargoed our wonderful island I have been forced to survive on rum. shivvvver!
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