Image

Comrades, beware!

User avatar
It seems that some enemies of diversity, equality and peace-n-hope-n-change-n-everything else, and cuddly puppies and rainbow-farting unicorns, wants to film Atlas Shrugged.

Be sure not to see this at a cinema next to you. Be sure not to let your children watch it.

In fact I'd propose that you move to Nepal or the Columbia Campus, just to avoid being contaminated by this evil individualistic book.

User avatar
Fear not comrades, I'm sure our loyal Hollywood cadres will paint Ayn Rand as a bitter alcoholic spinster, perhaps even a closet lesbian. As for John Galt, obviously an insane lunatic conspiracy theorist in the pocket of the war monger military-industrial complex. I bet even now Sean Penn is in a casting call for the part. Now if they can just manage to make a tie in to the Turner Diaries our subliminal message will be delivered to the drooling masses.

User avatar
For Hollywood a lesbian would be a <i>good</i> thing. But she wasn't--she had an affair with her prize student, Nathanial Brandon, which was unfair to his wife Barbara but not to her husband, Frank O'Connor, who was, er, gay.

User avatar
Y, luckily Hollywood will modernize the story to fit the times, similar to the way forward-thinking judges rethink the Constitution to fit their preferences current reality. Here is the way a modern producer might present it if she knows whats good for her:

A dedicated community organizer (played by Denzel Washington) tries to help the poor (Lou Diamond Phillips, Queen Latifah, Gary Busey) but is constantly undercut in his efforts by fat, greedy capitalists (Ed Asner, Ned Beatty, Pat Hingle) until he finally shrugs and gives up, leaving the world at the mercy of the aforementioned greedy capitalists. They proceed to pollute the air and water, increase global warming, flood the world with subprime mortgages and enrage terrorists freedom fighters around the globe. Horrified at what they have done, the greedy capitalists beg the community organizer to come out of retirement and organize the community. He tries, but it is too late and Rush Limbaugh (played by the Darth Vader combo from "Star Wars", including the costume) now controls the world and forces everyone left to smoke cigars and drive SUVs until they go bankrupt and choke to death. The End. Directed by Oliver Stone.

This is a flick all progressives can feel good watching about while we munch on rice cakes and spring water.

User avatar
Opiate, your plot makes sense to me. John Galt invented a motor which ran on static electricity. Hank Reardon invented a metal cheaper and lighter and stronger than steel. Let me suggest that Denzel, sorry DenZEL Washington be an inventor who discovered a microbe which eats oil and farts out oxygen. He is just about to put this microbe into every single oil tank, and down every single oil-well hole, so that all of the evil petrochemicals will be converted into oxygen. This has the effect of making it impossible to have internal-combustion engines, which will give the Goracle an Goregasm, and also it will make the atmosphere so rich in oxygen that lighting the match of a cigarette will cause the entire atmosphere to burn in one huge explosion.

But before that can happen, the baddies take over.

We can have the premier screening in Park City, Utah, where people can pay $5,000 to watch it, eat the rice cakes and drink the spring water. And if they pay $10,000 they get tofu shaped like Birkenstocks.

Hairy-legged dykes not included.

User avatar
Comrade Opiate! I like your idea. Everybody knows that without community organizers the world would die. The title is, of course, "Atlas Complied."

Image
I was thinking about this during the election. When exactly did community organizers appear on the scene and what major improvements have happened in the world thanks to their presence?

The world was poor and miserable until community organizers descended on Earth and implanted themselves into human bodies, controlling them and making them to work according to their ability and taking according to their need. The first thing they did was abolish greed. That's when suddenly - as if by magic - the misery disappeared and everybody in the community achieved a higher living standard.

That's what all the John Galts of the world want to take away from us - because they represent an evil race of red-headed space aliens who travel from planet to planet on their static-electricity-powered ships, snatch the most gifted and conscientious members of the community, infect them with selfishness, and take them to their home planet.

But chief community organizer issues a government mandate to invent an antidote to selfishness, and of course the government scientists respond to this by inventing it within the remainder of the Five-Year Plan. It spreads like wildfire, killing all the selfish people, and that also solves the problem of overpopulation. The only ones left on Earth are colonies of termites and community organizers.

The community organizers' host bodies also have died because they were acting a little bit selfishly when they inhaled oxygen but exhaled CO2, which was cheating. So community organizers implanted themselves into the bodies of termites instead, and lived happily ever after.

EllisWyatt
May I suggest Michael Moore as James Taggart. Mike is such an inspirational actor I can't wait to see how he portrays the act of establishing order in a chaotic capitalist controlled world. And maybe that dashing Bill Maher as Ragnar trashing all the nay-saying greed mongers.

OTOH
Maybe someone in Bollywood will pick this up.....

User avatar
What about Martin Sheen as Francisco d'Anconia? Instead of running copper mines though he will run recycling centers for aluminum cans. Because His O'liness won't allow nuclear power, and has shut down coal-fired plants, and because nearly all the hydroelectric power in America has been used, and because the Goracle hates the internal-combustion engine, that means that the only aluminum smelting, which requires a huge amount of power, will be done with a really big magnifying glass.

Or the telescopes which we no longer need to look into the sky because all our pressing problems are here on earth. Unless of course the Goracle is looking for the flying saucer which dropped him off in Roswell.

User avatar
Comrades, Do not fear! The Great Obamahmessiah has remedied this kapitalist exploitative myth by signing The Great Socialist Stimulus Equalizer in Denver in February (it's from the HEART you know). Just 1 kilometer from the mythic Galt's Gulch!

All Hail The Great Obamahmessiah!!!

Yes, Red Square, I had termites once. They form wondrous colonies. Feed on moisture, mud, and wood. It is best to keep them in the wild where they can consume branches of dead trees. They are extremely beneficial when one lives in regions with massive amounts of vegetation. Creating a cement barrier around the foundation of one's house keeps the glorious mud burrowing creatures away from the structural foundation. I have found that a mixture of anti-freeze and boric-acid work best to deter them from eating the wood. Glycol of the Ethylene variety is especially effective.

Long live the termites!

User avatar
My only problem with termites, who are otherwise model collectivist citizens, is that they contribute a lot of methane to the atmosphere. In terms of greenhouse gases, that is worse than the CO2 produced by human industries. On the other hand, it's yet another reason to get rid of the industries!

Ha-ha! I just had an idea. The Party can force US industrialists to exchange carbon credits with termite colonies in Africa. That should be fun. Imagine the look on their faces! Can we do that? Yes we can!

User avatar
Why is there a picture of Bonnie Fwank imbedded in the article?

User avatar
Fwank is a perfect fit for a number of the book's characters.

Anonymous
Commissar Obamissar V wrote:Why is there a picture of Bonnie Fwank imbedded in the article?

Don't you know Dr Ferris when you see him?

User avatar
Red Square wrote: Ha-ha! I just had an idea. The Party can force US industrialists to exchange carbon credits with termite colonies in Africa. That should be fun. Imagine the look on their faces! Can we do that? Yes we can!

My point exactly! Funny how reality works that way... Yes We Can!

User avatar
Comrade Guest,

That's a perfect match.

Comrade Red Square,

James Taggart may also be a good match for Bonnie. His ability to sit at the helm, (or on it, in Bonnie's case) of a corporation while driving it into the ground is the stuff of legends.

User avatar
I posted this picture on another thread a while ago but can't find it now. There's an online store that sells glasses and apparel with fictional AS logos -

Image

User avatar
Comradette Clinton might also make a good Dr. Ferris. I fear, however, that Washington is only big enough for one Marxist. It's anyone's guess who will get to be Lenin and who will get to be Trotsky.

User avatar
And in case you missed it, thiss topic is also discussed here:

Image

User avatar
I believe Danny Elfman could play The Redheaded One ™ in Atlas Complied(TM)

Here is an evil song that must be destroyed (censored from YouTube regularly while The Boss lives) The Peoples(TM) Demo Version of Kapitalism(TM):

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="https://www.youtube.com/v/OjxfwBHdvmo&h ... ram><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>


Here are evil lyrics:

CAPITALISM

There's nothing wrong with capitalism
There's nothing wrong with free enterprise
Dont try to make me feel guilty
Im so tired of hearing you cry

Theres nothing wrong with making some profit
If you ask me Ill say its just fine
Theres nothing wrong with wanting to live nice
Im so tired of hearing you whine
About the revolution
Bringin down the rich
When was the last time you dug a ditch, baby!

If it ain't one thing
Then its the other
Any cause that crosses your path
Your heart bleeds for anyone's brother
Ive got to tell you you're a pain in the ass

You criticize with plenty of vigor
You rationalize everything that you do
With catchy phrases and heavy quotations
And everybody is crazy but you

Youre just a middle class, socialist brat
From a suburban family and you never really had to work
And you tell me that we've got to get back
To the struggling masses (whoever they are)
You talk, talk, talk about suffering and pain
Your mouth is bigger than your entire brain
What the hell do you know about suffering and pain . . .

(repeat first verse)

(repeat chorus)

Theres nothing wrong with capitalism
Theres nothing wrong with capitalism
Theres nothing wrong with capitalism
Theres nothing wrong with capitalism

User avatar
Commissar Theocritus wrote:Opiate, your plot makes sense to me. John Galt invented a motor which ran on static electricity. Hank Reardon invented a metal cheaper and lighter and stronger than steel. Let me suggest that Denzel, sorry DenZEL Washington be an inventor who discovered a microbe which eats oil and farts out oxygen. He is just about to put this microbe into every single oil tank, and down every single oil-well hole, so that all of the evil petrochemicals will be converted into oxygen. This has the effect of making it impossible to have internal-combustion engines, which will give the Goracle an Goregasm, and also it will make the atmosphere so rich in oxygen that lighting the match of a cigarette will cause the entire atmosphere to burn in one huge explosion.

But before that can happen, the baddies take over.

We can have the premier screening in Park City, Utah, where people can pay $5,000 to watch it, eat the rice cakes and drink the spring water. And if they pay $10,000 they get tofu shaped like Birkenstocks.

Hairy-legged dykes not included.

Me likey! If they can get Micheal Moore to do a cameo as Al Gore, I'll bet Pauline Kael will rise from the dead just so she can give it 10 stars before heading back to Chicago to fill out some absentee ballots.

User avatar
Red Square wrote: The world was poor and miserable until community organizers descended on Earth and implanted themselves into human bodies, controlling them and making them to work according to their ability and taking according to their need.

This sounds like the plot of "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" which, if you remember, depicted legions of kindly outer space pods descending on a small town and replacing the greedy selfish capitalistic townspeople one by one with exact duplicates who were wonderful peaceful caring sharing collectivists (goody!) Their eventual goal was to replace all the evil selfish humans throughout the world with the wonderful peaceful caring sharing collectivists, thus turning this planet into a socialist utopia! However, one despicable evil greed-monkey capitalist stumbled onto the plan, escaped from the loving arms of his new comrades in the town and reported this all to the authorities. Unfortunately, in the movie the media did not do its job of covering up and ignoring the accusations of Obama's opponents and the reactionary authorities defied the People's will by blocking Hope and Change. It was one of the most terrifying films ever made; thank Obama life did not imitate art, eh?

User avatar
Comrade Red Rooster, what a truly glorious song!

User avatar
Opiate wrote:I'll bet Pauline Kael will rise from the dead just so she can give it 10 stars before heading back to Chicago to fill out some absentee ballots.
When did they start burying bodies after brain death? This is <i>terribly</i> important, Opiate. That means that we'll need a piano crate for Rosie.

And as for Michael Moore--a full size cargo container ought to do it, I'd think.

User avatar
Obamissar 7.62 wrote:Comrade Red Rooster, what a truly glorious song!

Yes Comrade, you can use this evil song to rile your state abolitionists Highly Trained Acorn Army into battle. You see it is the vileness of this capitalist pig that they will respond to.

It will make them want to stampede the nearest che t-shirt wearing idiot Bu$hitler hermaphrodite.

A glorious revolution to you!

User avatar
Commissar Theocritus wrote:
Opiate wrote:I'll bet Pauline Kael will rise from the dead just so she can give it 10 stars before heading back to Chicago to fill out some absentee ballots.
When did they start burying bodies after brain death? This is <i>terribly</i> important, Opiate. That means that we'll need a piano crate for Rosie.

And as for Michael Moore--a full size cargo container ought to do it, I'd think.

Ah Comrade, you make me laugh! They are phat, hella phat! You make me think of a song featuring the Obamahmessiah:

<object width="480" height="295"><param name="movie" value="https://www.youtube.com/v/2UjsB7QlG3I&h ... ram><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="295"></embed></object>


 
POST REPLY