Image

Comrades! Find your missing ballots!

User avatar
[img]/images/various_uploads/search_missing_democrat_votes_florida.jpg[/img]

With so many important races being so close and every vote needing to be counted (and some countered) it's absolutely imperative that you start looking for those missing ballots that always show up after the polls close.

First, check the trunk of your car, your attic, your neighbor's mailbox, or anyplace else you might have absentmindedly deposited a large number of ballots.

Second, sort through all your missing ballots and weed out any that might have chosen a Republican candidate. This isn't "voter fraud," this is just making sure that every valid vote is properly counted, and all Republican votes are automatically invalid. You'll be saving time during the recount and preventing the confusion that comes with too many choices.

Third, shout that all votes must be counted, especially yours. America is a democracy, so naturally the Democrat Party must win. If some fossil comes up and tells you America is a Republic, just apply pepper spray and push him off a bridge. Such intolerance must be stamped out decisively.

Fourth, if your truly patriotic efforts fail to turn the election, accuse the Republican candidate of voter suppression, colluding with Russia, stealing the election, and personally assaulting you even though you struggle with recalling specific details. You deserve to be heard!

So get on it, comrades! Act as if your ration booklet depended on it.

User avatar
Image
Leftism is like cancer. It can be in remission, but it always comes back, destroying healthy cells and spreading to vital organs. A cure for leftism would do as much good to humanity as a cure for cancer would. We need leftism research institutes, labs, treatment facilities, and charitable donation drives. The People's Cube is one such lab.

User avatar
Maybe another thread could be devoted to submissions for the latest DSM on Leftism. We could define symptoms and give diagnoses to anyone who has suffered episodes of Leftism for six months or more. Treatment would mean at least one hour of Rush Limbaugh for five days of every week.

User avatar
And to all the vote-counters in Florida: count those Democratic votes, and then count them again to make sure. Every Democrat vote should be counted twice!

User avatar
Ivan Betinov wrote:And to all the vote-counters in Florida: count those Democratic votes, and then count them again to make sure. Every Democrat vote should be counted twice!
So THAT'S what recount means. Thanks for clarifying.

User avatar
I will sue Florida to recognize that I self identify as the winner, no one can challenge me!

User avatar
CNN continues the struggle for the Greater Good in Georgia with exemplary fair and unbiased reporting.

User avatar
A new cache of votes has been discovered in Georgia that heavily favors Stacy Abrams! Well done, comrades. Keep up the good work!

User avatar
PROG OFF:

When thinking about the incentive for power grabs via ballot fraud, never forget that Obamacare's 60 vote Demokrat majority was possible only because of Al Franken's theft of Norm Coleman's seat. The real reason he was pressured to retire was not groping, but to flush out last cycle's cheat from the next vote fraud cycle's headlines. In case you forgot:

FrankenColeman.GIF

Coleman is now dealing with the recurrence of cancer, so it's unlikely he would ever make a return to today's headlines as an electoral victim to remind voters of how unfair our corrupted politicians are.

https://minnesota.cbslocal.com/2018/11/ ... cer-fight/

Norm.GIF
Norm Coleman deserves our respect, and (God willing) his health. And America deserves to know that our overly powerful representation is not the product of fraud.

User avatar
[img]/images/various_uploads/Coffin_I_Voted+Blue_Wave.jpg[/img]

[highlight=#ffff99]Komissar al-Blogunov said . . . With so many important races being so close and every vote needing to be counted (and some countered) it's absolutely imperative that you start looking for those missing ballots that always show up after the polls close.

First, check the trunk of your car, your attic, your neighbor's mailbox, or anyplace else you might have absentmindedly deposited a large number of ballots.[/highlight]

Komissar, I have heard your clarion call to arms locate any stray, free-range ballots that may be lost little dogies wandering the fruited plain. This comrade understands full well the importance of this round-up and I am very excited to report that just this very morning while pondering life without the kollective, ™ I stumbled upon a number of ballot boxes labeled 'Provisional Ballots." Well, it turns out these ballots are NOT so provisional after all. As good fortune would have it, all of these little free-range ballots have been validated by Brenda Snipes (she who must ALSO be believed).

Furthermore, in what can only be termed an incredible coincidence, ALL of these little dogies are all sporting the Bar "D" brand (wink, wink). What I am wondering Komissar, is if there is a jurisdiction, legislative district, congressional district or municipality that may be in dire need of these? I will personally requisition a tractor and pup (yes, there are that many) and deliver these myself. CVW

User avatar
Comrade Vasily Willy wrote:[highlight=#ffff99]Komissar al-Blogunov said . . . With so many important races being so close and every vote needing to be counted (and some countered) it's absolutely imperative that you start looking for those missing ballots that always show up after the polls close.

First, check the trunk of your car, your attic, your neighbor's mailbox, or anyplace else you might have absentmindedly deposited a large number of ballots.[/highlight]

Komissar, I have heard your clarion call to arms locate any stray, free-range ballots that may be lost little dogies wandering the fruited plain. This comrade understands full well the importance of this round-up and I am very excited to report that just this very morning while pondering life without the kollective, ™ I stumbled upon a number of ballot boxes labeled 'Provisional Ballots." Well, it turns out these ballots are NOT so provisional after all. As good fortune would have it, all of these little free-range ballots have been validated by Brenda Snipes (she who must ALSO be believed).

Furthermore, in what can only be termed an incredible coincidence, ALL of these little dogies are all sporting the Bar "D" brand (wink, wink). What I am wondering Komissar, is if there is a jurisdiction, legislative district, congressional district or municipality that may be in dire need of these? I will personally requisition a tractor and pup (yes, there are that many) and deliver these myself. CVW
Well done, Comrade VW. It grieves me to report that while there are those loyal and competent members of the Party who know how to throw an election, we are also plagued with amateurs.

The Wile E Coyote surplus comic book props fooled nobody. You might say the provocation bombed. And what about basic voter fraud? Mix in the provisional ballots, count them, and declare the Democrat the victor. Easy, right? Any snowflake should have been up to that, but alas, no. So while I commend you and all the other comrades who have done due diligence in rounding up ballots, I'm sorry to say it's too late. We've been Trumped.
Good Stalin! Where is Lenin when you need him?


 
POST REPLY