I, as a retired Cold War warrior, never stopped working for the Яodiиa. So an old friend gave me a copy of a recording made two days ago when the DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя called Benyamin Netanyahu at 3:00 AM Jerusalem time. (Our old bugs at the White House never stopped working.)

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “Hello Bibi, how are you?”

Netanyahu – “I was hoping to get more than a phone call at 3AM; after all you are meeting the Muslim Brotherhood Egyptian Prez in a few days.”

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “I'm sorry for that, but my schedule is too busy. But I'm taking care you.”

Netanyahu – “Taking care, HOW? Iran will have nukes before Christmas, while nothing done up to now has worked.”

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “We are doing all we can. But your comments are making me lose face. In fact, I can blame you for my ambassador getting raped and killed in Lybia tonight.”

Netanyahu – “Me??? We told you four months ago of what they were up to. How can you blame me for what you knew would happen months ahead of time?”

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “All that is water under the bridge. But you know personally that if I lose face, the world becomes unsafe for YOU and me. By the way, you better call off your plans to bomb Iran's targets, or else you will not have an IDF air force to protect you.”

Netanyahu – “What???”

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “If you attack Iran BEFORE my re-election, I will be forced to order my planes to shoot down your entire IDF air force, and then you will end up with Iranian nukes, and without an air force to protect you.”

Netanyahu – “I hope you are aware that such a move would mean a second Jewish Holocaust.”

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “Don't exaggerate Bibi; you Jews always speak in hyperbole. You know as well as I, that I am better qualified to defend you than your IDF.”

Netanyahu – “Like when? When have YOU ever defended Israel from her enemies?”

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “You don't know all the requests I constantly get from your Mideast neighbors to help them invade you, and I have kept them back. I'm actually protecting you. By the way, I need $500 million in campaign contributions if you know what I mean…”

Netanyahu – “I do know what you mean. I am not Hugo Chavez though; so I can't dispense with the money of Israeli taxpayers. But, I suggest you don't try that line again. In fact, I suggest you keep your air assets from getting in our way, or else you may find out the hard way that I mean to protect Israel. This ends our chat, good night.”

DЭMOCЯAT Paяty Dэaя Lэadэя – “Don't hang up please. What do you mean? Damn, he hung up!!!”

I do not know why this Netanyahu person simply does not contribute $3 to the next "My Dinner with Barack" campaign raffle and hope that he wins. He could have dinner with Barack (and a Hollywood celebrity, like Anna Wintour!) and he could then bring up whatever piddling little business he keeps interrupting the president's golf game to bother him with. If Netanyaski does not win the first time, TRY TRY AGAIN! There will be many chances to win before November for there will be many, many more raffles.

Comrades, let us be clear, Keep your eye on the ball. Fat people are the greatest threat to national security.

She just may have a point........