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DESTROY CHRISTMAS!

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My Comrades

This morning while eating my breakfast of runny boiled eggs, toast soldiers and Ceylon tea, my manservant switched the on the radio and a song I had not heard in ages played over the airwaves. It was a horrible, decadent capitalistic advert for something or another that is not for sale in the glorious People's Paradise of Zimbabwe, but only south of the border in Azania. I forget what it was.

But that song... It took me about an hour to remember what the song was. It was a Christmas carol. And that realization made me vomit a bit in my mouth. So I am now sitting here, on my People's Commode, remembering why Christmas is such an evil idea, and why all good Progs are Atheists.
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You see, dear comrades, if there is no God, then life in general and human life in particular has no intrinsic value. That means that the value of the life of another human is simply this: Whatever value it has to me. In other words: The value of a prole's life is firstly in the fact that he votes for me. Secondly he has value that can be monetized in the form of taxes, that is paid to me. And thirdly some proles have value because help me procreate and ensure the transmission of my DNA to the next generation.


Since the only basis for morality is the value of human life this has far reaching implications. Good is defined by the value I can extract from other human lives for myself. Evil is anything that reduces the value another person has for me.

Slavery is good. Of course we progs don't use the word “slavery” anymore, because the word has gained some negative value. We now call slavery “Freedom”!

Don't be shocked. The word “freedom” does not mean freedom anymore. Like any word that has been recycled by the glorious system of NewSpeak, the word now has two entirely new meanings.
  1. What we say it means: We tell the proles that “Freedom” actually means “Free Stuff.” Free houses, free food, free electricity, free water, free healthcare.
  2. What the word really means when we use it: “Freedom” means dependence on the state given free stuff, these “entitlements” that serve as bonds we use to bind people in poverty and slavery to the state.

Slavery is the best way to actually increase the value of other human beings to me. The easiest way to achieve slavery is to tax people. The traditional definition of slavery is simply this: If the fruit of a persons labour belongs to somebody else. Well, your labour belongs to the state, which is, by definition, ME!

Murder and Genocide are good, but not as good as slavery. Since slavery has the glorious potential of turnig a life with pure negative value into actual positive value, it is always preferred over Murder and Genocide. But some lives simply cannot be redeemed. Some people or peoples are so beyond redemption (they have such big negative value to me) that the only way out is Murder and Genocide. It can save a career and make me rich.

Again, my comrades, we have changed the meanining of words according to NewSpeak principles. We do not talk of Murder and Genocide anymore. Now we call it “The Right to Choose”, “End of Life Councilling”, “Compassionate Euthanasia” etc.

If there is no God then I have no responsibility to anybody but myself. I do not need to listen to my proles, I can simply rule over them. I do not have responsibility to my family, I can use them, abuse them as I see fit, to increase their value to me.

Without responsibility to anybody, the whole concept of cause and effect is destroyed. The poverty that is rampant here is Zimbabwe is not because of anything I did. It is because of British Imperialism and South African Apartheid. Or, as you Americans would have it, George Bush.

And the most glorious thing at all, dear comrades, is that without Responsibility, there is no Guilt!

Guilt is the biggest threat to the value my life has to myself. Guilt makes me feel depressed. It robs me of the joys of Slavery, Murder and Genocide. It robs you of the pleasure of Extracting Value from other lives.

Guilt is truly the pinnacle of all evil! Guilt makes me realize how truly meaningless my own life is!

My comrades, if Christmas is true, then every single precept of Progdom is false.

If Christmas is true then every single human life has intrinsic value becuase it's Creator values it.

If Christmas is true then your life is worth what Someone was willing to pay for you: The life of his own Son. Now THAT really galls me, that my proles should have value equal to the price paid for them: GOD'S OWN SON! That they do not belong to me but to some other dictator in the sky who bought them and paid for them with his own blood!

If Christmas is true and proles belong to God, then they can be really Free! If they belong to God, then the State (which is me) cannot own them. That is why that most despicable document, the American Declaration of Independence states with such evil arrogance: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

I spit on the American Declaration of Independence!

If Christmas is true then human life has value far above and beyond its value to me. Even if a person has severe negative value to me, that life still has value to it's Creator. Therefore, if Christmas is true then Murder and Genocide are wrong. If Christmas is true and human life has intrinsic value then NO woman has the right choose to murder her unborn offspring.

If Christmas is true and human life has value then I have Responsibility, not to me, but to other humans! That means I will have to be faithful to my wife, care for my kids, and take responsibility for my neighbours, instead of letting the State do all these things for me!

That means that I cannot Follow My Heart! as the Church of Hollywood dictates, but I have to DO What is Right!

MY COMRADES, CAN YOU SEE HOW TOXIC CHRISTMAS IS TO THE WHOLE PROGRESSIVE IDEOLOGY?

If Christmas is true then I AM GUILTY!

I HAVE TO DESTROY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!

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Dictator Obamugabe! Comrade Stalin sacrificed 20 million soviets to pay for the lives of the rest of the glorious motherland! Certainly this knowledge and example of good government brings cheer to true believers.

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It takes a True Dictator to espouse the Current Truth so eloquently.

Sir, may your words be written on the top of every "Tree of Knowledge"
this festivus winter solstice season!

Atheist_Christmas_Tree.jpg

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Most Highly Esteemed Comrade,
Obamugabe said:
"This morning while eating my breakfast of runny boiled eggs, toast soldiers and Ceylon tea.........
So I am now sitting here, on my People's Commode, remembering why Christmas is such an evil idea, and why all good Progs are Atheists."

toast soldiers???? or toasted soldiers? LOL

I can see why you were sitting on your commode, Mi Muchacho!....LMFAO... Please, allow me to re-train your chef (?), immediately! Such an asset as yourself to our cause should not ever be ingesting this disgusting tripe!

Perhaps a few weeks in the Upstate NY gulag, (where my cooking school is located) will improve your chef's (?) skills, Si? I have several openings after my last purge, ahhh.... graduations, (due to the fact that the stupid interns couldn't even boil water due to their botched JiffyLobos...note: demand explanation of this travesty from Theo:, Is this any way to run a business?), and the tuition is very reasonable. Of course, you shall receive the Inner Circle discount of 100%, or,if you wish, you may send me the so-called chef's scrotum that I will turn into the most delectable dish, just for you!

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Alfred

These poor Seattlites do not understand that their brains are nothing but heaps of chemicals that are also to be found in lumps of coal. The final repository off all this fantastic knowledge has no more value than a lump of coal.

So what if they worship lumps of coal? What is the point of having a mind if you use it only to worship your own mind?

They would spend their time more productively by finding repositories for their DNA strands. For as the Holy Divine Richard Dawkins, Brightest of the Bright, Truest of the True Believers tells us, DNA exists for only one reason, and that is to ensure the propagation and survival of its sequences.

But then, each to his own. Give me a nice bloody execution at dawn and I am as happy as a pig in Palestine.

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Comrade Gourmet

You are indeed extremely perceptive!

I salute you, sir!

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Good thing that this whole "religion" idea is a bunch of Hokum. I really hate the idea that everyone is equal. If everyone is equal, worthy of this so-called "salvation," what is to keep us Progressives in our proper place of being more equal by virtue of our superior intellects and understanding?

Che, does your cooking school have any summer programs? I might be interested in learning some professional moves....

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The Great Obamugabe was for saying this such thing:
The easiest way to achieve slavery is to tax people.

Comrade, I know I am just first wife of number two of Osama been Laidon, but I am for disagreeing with what you have been for saying above. Even if you were for the taxation of 100 per cent you would not be for having the good 'slavery'.

You must be for giving the proles the false choice. Here is little example from my own life. The CPPP is always in the need of the worker. I make announcement in village: "Who would like to be for working in poppy field? No, you would not like to be for that work? OK, then you can be for suicide bomber as husband is needing of good jihadist!"

BINGO! I to have so many of the workers in the field. They are always to have such freedom to do the choosing.

Freedom to choose is true slavery. Have you not been for looking at elections of the evil Amerikkka?

There is no God, there is only All Ah.

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1.What we say it means: We tell the proles that “Freedom” actually means “Free Stuff.” Free houses, free food, free electricity, free water, free healthcare.
2.What the word really means when we use it: “Freedom” means dependence on the state given free stuff, these “entitlements” that serve as bonds we use to bind people in poverty and slavery to the state.

If it were not for the glorious reinterpretation and clarification of the wordage and verbiage, I do not know how the little peoples would ever manage. You have made the meanings, oh so clear to all and I am sure they are grateful as they wait impatiently for their welfare/food/medicade and free cheese, especially in this glorious winter solstice season of government giving.

I must be off to see up my solstice government giving to me tree and place all my government entitlements underneath for display!

Happy Government Giving Winter Solstice Season to all, loyal comrades!
(green is the color of money, is it not)

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You are now truly enlightened, Fraulein-San

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Dear glorious comrade Obamugabe, we in the enlightened Cube are all equally enlightened, are we not. (and if not, do we really want to mention names of those not as enlighted as we. I am thinking, no so much).

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Am I the only one who finds it troubling that these atheists would hang the processed corpses of murdered trees (paper cards) on a living tree? What sort of message does that send?

Obamugabe, I highly recommend Che Gourmet's cooking school. Their unique curriculum takes the student's inherent strengths and channels it into culinary skills. Both Obama and the Frau received training which will equip them for their next job.

mcdonaldS.gif

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Comrade Whoopie

We live in an imperfect world.

Fraulein

Enlightenment is good, as long as you dont use incandescent light bulbs.

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"corpses of murdered trees " - oh my, what a very well thought out thought you had. Again you leave me surprised and speechless. You have nailed the Marxist on the noggin with that one (oopsl, NO personal offense should be taken!) What kind of ill-considered consideration could be given to placing these deadened, lifeless trees on the not so dead and lifeless tress? Nothing spells Sierra Club like mocking dead trees, now does it? I am now officially mauled appalled.

But I do not remember speaking to you about any previous training skills I might or might not have had in a previous time, Comrade Whoopie. Have you been going through my mail and diary again??? BTW, want a homemade cookie? I would NEVER EVER USE incandescententials and regardless of what you might have heard or read, that was NOT me reported buying some at the local Gulag grocery!!!

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Comrade Obamugabe opines:

"This morning while eating my breakfast of runny boiled eggs, toast soldiers and Ceylon tea, my manservant switched the on the radio and a song I had not heard in ages played over the airwaves. It was a horrible, decadent capitalistic advert for something or another that is not for sale in the glorious People's Paradise of Zimbabwe, but only south of the border in Azania. I forget what it was.

But that song... It took me about an hour to remember what the song was. It was a Christmas carol."

I am authorized to broadcast just two Christmas carols. The one you heard this AM was certainly by Lennon. I only wish it was that Lenin, but we provide for the collective as best possible. 'Happy Xmas (War Is Over)' is a fine poke in the eye of the capitalist war mongers. I am surprised you failed to grasp the subtlety of the message.

Our second approved carol is Greg Lake's 'Father Christmas'. Enjoy this dismal ditty tomorrow with your eggs.

No, we NEVER take requests.

Listen. Always.

Also, not to derail the people's fine thread here but....I was recently paid an old debt with this: ImageAt first glance I assumed that I had been grossly overpaid. When I dirtied myself in money changing, turning your fine note into Roubles, it was only a kopeck, and a sympathy kopeck at that. Tell me, Obamugabe, was this note worth more than the pile of stones depicted on it when printed? It certainly isn't today.

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Reiuxcat has a good point. In the 20th century over 100 million people were sacrificed for the common good. Christmas is about the sacrifice of only one man. One man vs 100 million? It's not fair! What is it going to take? 200 million? 500 million? One billion? This century is still young, but face it Comrades, we've got to do a whole lot better or this Christmas thing will just go on and on.

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Comrades Cat and Rasputin

Rasputin, thank for pointing it out to me, Cat's message was so short I overlooked its profundity.

It is absolutely true. Christianity is a defective ideology. Who ever heard of sacrificing only ONE life for the greater good?

Pathetic!

Preposterous!

I personally sacrificed THOUSANDS of lives to rid Zimbabwe of British Imperialism and Ian Smith's Apartheid. And I still sacrifice thousands each year in order to keep Zimbabwe the glorious People's Paradise it is!

As John Lennon said: I am more popular than Jesus Christ.

Well, I sacrificed more than their God. Thousands of Proles vs one dirty Kulak.

100 000 000 lives holocausted to glorious socialism.

Now THERE is a message the world should hear!

Amandla!

Obamugabe

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Radio, the image on that Zimbuck note represents the ancient city of Zimbabwe. Apparently the ancient Rhodesian's never did figure out how to cut the stones and lay them properly so they just stacked them one atop another and called it a city. Had they had the wits to use the building techniques of the ancient Egyptians or Greeks perhaps more of the city would be standing today.

(Tourists came to Rhodesia to see the ruins of Zimbabwe. Now they come to Zimbabwe to view the ruins of Rhodesia.)

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Grigori E.R. wrote:Reiuxcat has a good point. In the 20th century over 100 million people were sacrificed for the common good. Christmas is about the sacrifice of only one man. One man vs 100 million? It's not fair! What is it going to take? 200 million? 500 million? One billion? This century is still young, but face it Comrades, we've got to do a whole lot better or this Christmas thing will just go on and on.
Comrade Grigori, Perhaps you are reading your calendar backwards,too much vodka or something. The winter solstice event supposedly marks a birth and not a death. CT

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Yes, Comrade Tooorisky, the Christians celebrate the birth of Christ. On the other hand we celebrate the sacrifice required of us all to promote the New World Order of Next Tuesday.

It's so good to see our beloved Che Gourmet back. I can only imagine the culinary delights planned for this year's Winter Solstice Party.

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Comrade Grigorei,

Your enlightenment is appreciated.

Freedom of choice for proles can be a good thing. I submitted incorrect information and posted it as a fact.

The information officers who visited at 3am were about to do me violence when I reminded them of winter solstice approaching.

As it was "the season" they gave me a choice 15 lashes and no beet ration for 2 months, or 25 lashes and nothing further.

I took the latter as the best deal for me. After they were done, I thought I misjudged; I may have a sore back for a few weeks, but at least I will get a slice of beet pie!

Comrade Whoopie wrote:Am I the only one who finds it troubling that these atheists would hang the processed corpses of murdered trees (paper cards) on a living tree? What sort of message does that send?
Why should this trouble you comrade? Cards are Soylent Green for trees. Unenlightened proles will be fertilizer for beet fields. We should not use them to fertilize beans and cabbages, as not even unenlightened proles are so unenlightened as to want to be source of methane for Party Elite. By the way, Comrade Fraulein, winter soltisce bribe griftgift check is in mail. Trust me. Would I lie?

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Comrades,

Before they were called Christmas [Greek?] Trees, they were known as Tammuz Trees from Babylon. Simeramus was the mother, she thought of hanging spherical objects on the trees to remind her of dead husband Nimrod.

Have these trees been hijacked for another purpose?

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Have you heard about the wealthy man who wandered into Joe's Carpentry shop to order a custom bed.

How much will it cost and who do you have to help you?

Joe told him and called his son. Upon seeing him the customer said" Oh Jesus! This is a big job, do you have bigger helpers?

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That reminds me of a joke...(be quiet Frau)

All this talk of Obama's birth certificate is strictly partisan. Republicans believe he was born in Kenya, Democrats believe he was born in Bethlehem.

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OH MY, COMRADE WHOOPIE, FINALLY SOMETHING TO GO WHOOPEE ABOUT, NO? At last, a real chuckle we have had... I mean, besides laughing at you, with can laugh with you on this one! ha ha heheh


bo bethl.jpg

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[OFF]

Paper Trained.jpg
Maybe our mongrel in chief can borrow little Bobo's papers?

Would that offend the first dog (no, not the bitch, the other one)?

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Comrades,

The left side do not believe he was born in bethlehem. He was born near a stable in Hawaii.
Hawaiian stables are not required to keep birth records.

The problem persists to this date.


 
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