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Divorcing? No Sex If Court Denies Permission!

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Loyal Comrades,

Reason: State authorities have shirked their duty in matters of sexual conduct far too long. Finally, a thoughtful Massachusetts citizen has petitioned the legislature for redress of this appalling situation. The petition consists of a single paragraph:

“In divorce, separation, or 209A proceedings involving children and a marital home, the party remaining in the home shall not conduct a dating or sexual relationship within the home until a divorce is final and all financial and custody issues are resolved, unless the express permission is granted by the courts.”

If that isn't clear enough for you, permit me to summarize: Keep it in you pants. (Or, panties - which ever applies) Hopefully, the petition will be quickly adopted and pass court scrutiny in the People's Democratic Republic of Massachusetts. On the day the new law is implemented I will personally apply for the position of Chief Enforcement Officer. Wish me luck!

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If I'm the judge, will I be able to get kickbacks in kind for granting an express permission to conduct a dating or sexual relationship? I won't be so greedy to demand it from both parties in the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship, just one party will be enough unless the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship is conducted between two consenting lesbian parties.

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This is absolutely necessary For the Children™ ! Can you imagine the trauma they will suffer if they see mommy or daddy's significant other in the home while the divorce is pending? Only after a judge signs a divorce decree can a parent safely shack up with a boyfriend or girlfriend or both and have wild sex all over the former marital residence. The children will be able to cope then because they know it has been approved by the State!

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This is a pretty standard order in the Family Courts in Kentucky. Parents that have been separated for years are forced to move their paramour out of the home once they finally get around to filing for divorce, even though that paramour has been a significant part of the children's lives since the separation and will resume being so the second the divorce decree is signed. Why?

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Because the State says so! Is mandatory!


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Red Square wrote:... unless the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship is conducted between two consenting lesbian parties.

Proceed with caution, Comrade Director, this plan has a slight flaw...
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Some guidance for the judiciary will be appropriate so that orders may define exactly what and what is not permitted (i.e., "nothing on pages 30-42; all of pages 69-127; and, page 212 is permissible with prior approval of Obamacare certified physician").

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It sounds like a law designed to protect stupid people. Maybe I married the wrong women in this regard (among many others) but if either of my two ex wives thought I was banging their prospective replacement with the confines of our house, the authorities would stil be looking for all my body parts.

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Captain Craptek wrote:On the day the new law is implemented I will personally apply for the position of Chief Enforcement Officer. Wish me luck!

An abuse of power, comrade.
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Red Square wrote:I won't be so greedy to demand it from both parties in the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship, just one party will be enough unless the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship is conducted between two consenting lesbian parties.

Be careful what you wish for.
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El Presidente wrote:
Red Square wrote:I won't be so greedy to demand it from both parties in the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship, just one party will be enough unless the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship is conducted between two consenting lesbian parties.

Be careful what you wish for.
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Wait wait wait...What if I feel like a lesbian one evening, and my soon to be ex wife is feeling a bit gay, would that count as 2 consenting lesbian adults? Captain, you are the officer in charge, do I get some of that?



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Red Walrus wrote:
El Presidente wrote:
Red Square wrote:I won't be so greedy to demand it from both parties in the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship, just one party will be enough unless the aforementioned dating or sexual relationship is conducted between two consenting lesbian parties.

Be careful what you wish for.
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Wait wait wait...What if I feel like a lesbian one evening, and my soon to be ex wife is feeling a bit gay, would that count as 2 consenting lesbian adults? Captain, you are the officer in charge, do I get some of that?

Sorry comrades - but the rules apply to all creatures great and small, sexual and asexual, copulating or budding. One size fits all - it's the "right thing to do" - we're looking at this carefully - looking at it like a laser - and if congress won't help me, I'll use my pen.

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Captain Craptek wrote: Sorry comrades - but the rules apply to all creatures great and small, sexual and asexual, copulating or budding. One size fits all - it's the "right thing to do" - we're looking at this carefully - looking at it like a laser - and if congress won't help me, [highlight=#ffff00]I'll use my pen[/highlight].
Bill Clinton would use a cigar. But to each his own, I suppose.

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RedDiaperette wrote:
Captain Craptek wrote: Sorry comrades - but the rules apply to all creatures great and small, sexual and asexual, copulating or budding. One size fits all - it's the "right thing to do" - we're looking at this carefully - looking at it like a laser - and if congress won't help me, [highlight=#ffff00]I'll use my pen[/highlight].
Bill Clinton would use a cigar. But to each his own, I suppose.
Retired Marine Corps officer friend of mine always said that that was a waste of a perfectly fine Cuban cigar - but as you said, to each his own! :O

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R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:
RedDiaperette wrote:
Captain Craptek wrote: Sorry comrades - but the rules apply to all creatures great and small, sexual and asexual, copulating or budding. One size fits all - it's the "right thing to do" - we're looking at this carefully - looking at it like a laser - and if congress won't help me, [highlight=#ffff00]I'll use my pen[/highlight].
Bill Clinton would use a cigar. But to each his own, I suppose.
Retired Marine Corps officer friend of mine always said that that was a waste of a perfectly fine Cuban cigar - but as you said, to each his own! :O

Comrades:

The pen is mightier than the cigar.

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