Michelle Obama orders 1,700-calorie meal at Shake Shack

By Natalie Jennings

Update: We made a mistake in our original calculations. The calorie-count for the first lady's order was actually 1,700, not the 1,556 we originally reported. Our apologies.


First lady Michelle Obama ordered a whopper of a meal at the newly opened Washington diner Shake Shack during lunch on Monday.

A Washington Post journalist on the scene confirmed the first lady, who's made a cause out of child nutrition, ordered a ShackBurger, fries, chocolate shake and a Diet Coke while the street and sidewalk in front of the usually-packed Shake Shack were closed by security during her visit.

Michelle had a little lamb
Some fresh fat cakes and a whole smoked ham
Plus a double burger smeared with jam
Topped off with a diet Coke
It made the naughty waiters grin to see her order's excess
And when they carried Michelle out, her ass was big as Texas

Comrades,
The term "First Companion" seems much more appropriate!

Major Mistake says, you just made a big one, Sir!

Surely no one is surprised by this. She is a "ruling Elite" ™ after all. Such petty rules of nutrition are not meant for such as she....And it can't be easy to maintain that broad beam that is now so famous. She is just living up to the expectations of little proles who want exemplars.I see the party is exerting it's "all spaces are more equal" power. who needs paragraph breaks anyway? The Party obviously sees that run-on sentences are better for proles who should not be able to read anyway.

It's an unfathomable mystery to me why anyone would order a diet drink when you are blowing the calorie count for the day with one meal...must be some sort of addiction to the taste thing?

Che Gourmet wrote:It's an unfathomable mystery to me why anyone would order a diet drink when you are blowing the calorie count for the day with one meal...must be some sort of addiction to the taste thing?

My Dear Comrade Che Gourmet,


As the Minister of Truth with great expertise on parsing words, I fear your careless syntax may mislead some among the sweating masses that FLOTUS has been having relations with a Count whose code-name is Calorie.


--Minister of Truth

FLATUS retained the moral high-ground by not insulting our Mooslim comrades. She did not order bacon...

Viva Obama! And Barry too.

Hey now, give the gal a break! It's not like she getting much meat at home.