France to Ensure Peace in Lebanon

France to send troops to Lebanon for UN peacekeeping force

France today stated that the elite French 101st Mime Division is to be sent to Lebanon to ensure the peace.

The Screaming Goose Livers will mime parachuting into Lebanon and mime the use of force if encountered by the social welfare organization Hezbollah. In case of actual confrontation each mime will be equipped with a white handkerchief to wave surrender.

Once these objectives are achieved, the Americans will be called in to save their sorry derrieres again.

Kofi Annan has approved the plan and mobilization is set for 2010 once the Chirac Line has been finished, stopping 50 kilometers short of the Syrian border.

Le Boom, Le Pow, Le Bang
 

Wait... France has elite troops? What kind of material are their white flags made of? They must be made of a better fabric than the standard issue flags.
 

But most importantly, do they have a plan and do they have an exit strategy?
 

I wonder if this is where Dr. Palimpsest is? Isn't he French? Or does he just have a vinyard there?

With all the trouble that the troop-poor UN has getting peace-keeping troops from European countries I think it would be a good idea to start a draft for United Nations troops. This would be a good means of fighting world-wide terrorism and advancing the Party. Kills two birds with one stone. And the Democratic party could use this idea and win big in November. Who could vote against a UN draft? Vote Democrat! Soldiers without borders!

How can I get this idea to Howard Dean?
 

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Once these objectives are achieved, the Americans will be called in to save their sorry derrieres again.


I thought the Amerikans cancelled all future liberations of France...
 

Reuters

Intense street miming broke out in southern Lebanon this morning as French peacekeeping mimes encountered Hezbollah social case workers distributing candy to children and helping little old ladies across the street.

The mimes were what appeared to be "boxed in" and "walking against the wind" and made little progress against the handing out of fake Great Satan hundred dollar bills the Hezbollah social workers were giving away by the bushel full.

As the afternoon approached both sides sat down for croissants and a nice bottle of merlot.

http://www.ihatemimes.com/games
 

The odor of the mimes alone will bring peace and stability to the region, resistence to the stench is utterlessly futile...
 

Reuters

Fierce miming continued today on the outskirts of Beirut as French peacekeepers encountered the Hezbollah Good Humor Man handing out free fudgesickles and martyr kits for the kiddies.

Hezbollah took matters into their own hands and kidnapped a mime and put him into a shredder, just like Uday & Qusay used to do in Iraq. This unnerved the French, who in turn offered a dinner of escargot and a vintage bottle of Chateau Briand to Hezbollah who declined the offer and stated that they'd rather eat goat than slimey snails.

Here is the link to the shredding incident. WARNING: This may be too graphic for our younger viewers.

http://www.zooass.com/games/maimthemime/main.shtml
 

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Here is the link to the shredding incident. WARNING: This may be too graphic for our younger viewers.


that is GREAT...I hate mimes
 

"Thank you, sir. May I chip another?"

Ha, ha, ha! What fun. Thank you Laika.
 

Duffel Blog:

French military surrenders to coronavirus

PARIS – In a desperate attempt to curb the spread of coronavirus disease, or COVID-19, within its borders, the French military surrendered unconditionally to the virus in a beautifully choreographed public ceremony this morning.

“I have trained my entire life for this moment,” said France’s Chief of Defense Staff, Gen. François Gérard Marie Lecointre, as he dutifully laid his saber at the foot of one of the virus’s numerous docking glycoproteins. “Surrendering to a greater force, or in this case a superior pseudo-living particle, is the greatest distinction for which an officer in our nation’s employ can strive.”