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On the same day as the royal wedding, Hillary Clinton crowned herself Tsarina... or whatever 28 genders a Tsar can be. "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em," she said, holding a Russian ushanka hat with a red star emblem.

The good news is, Hillary doesn't need to worry that the press will interpret the joke as an open signal to Russia, the way they did when Trump asked the Russians to find Hillary's lost 33,000 emails.

But the joke is on us, given that as Secretary of State, Hillary became a few million rubles richer after signing off on the Uranium One deal, letting Russia acquire 20% of America's uranium reserves.

If the media still hasn't picked up on that Hillary-Russia collusion story, will they do it because of some silly hat? We can only cackle along with our Many-Titted Empress: HA, HA, HA!

The funniest part is that Trump never even needed to go to Russia to "get dirt on Hillary" because the dirt has been piling up in front of our eyes for decades, starting with the Whitewater scandal. Only those living under a rock or getting their news from the mainstream media would believe that one needed Russia's guidance to step into it.


Big and furry ushanka tips to Margaret and Laika the Space Dog for contributing to the story.

In addition to the hat, Hillary has also been awarded Hero Of Socialist Labor medal.

Red Square wrote:Only those living under the rock or getting their news from the mainstream media would believe that one needed Russia's guidance to step into it.

It's hard to get a good signal living under a rock. Besides, not everyone can afford to live in a nice, cozy cardboard box under a bridge.

Why Comrades, I think it's wonderful that Yale U. has a speaker to show that with a good education, hard work, cattle futures securities fraud, stealing White House furniture and extorting bribes from foreign governments as Secretary of State, and marriage to the right kind of rapist, sexual predator and scumbag upstanding young man, the sky is the limit!

If Hillary really wants to rock that Trotsky vibe she's gonna need an ice axe. I'd be happy to loan her mine.