You know who you are. You place your YouTube, or some not necessarily relevant cartoon into the People's Blog, but you have nothing else to contribute. This is a gulag dammit! And, we're all posting behind the irony curtain. Where's your irony? Where's your funny? I know you have talent. I can see it in your Avatars. But, it seems lately, you've been clogging the blog with one YouTube after another, or you put up a non-related cartoon.

Well, I don't like it. You are ruining the Cube.

We are made progs here. And in order to be entertaining, you must not only talk the talk, you must walk the walk. So there! Get with it. Either join the Cube community, and post like a true made prog,or, or, you might just find yourself in the YouTube Gulag.

I'm sending all of you to re-education camp. Go to the following links and you will learn from these Cubist Hall of Famers how to korrectly post on the blog!

What exactly are you bringing to the party besides slapping up some YouTube or other. When do you comment on other posts? This is a collective, after all.

And here's another complaint: When you see that someone has already posted a creative post about a certain subject, why not add to their post, instead of selfishly throwing up a brand new post that consists of nothing but a YouTube.

You all ought to be thrown into a YouTube gulag, or at the very least, get a good whacking by Pinkie with her shovel.

All right, if you want to show a YouTube, fine. But, add something to it. Rack your brain. You'll find there's more in your head than you ever imagined, and it will help you hone your writing skills. Make it interesting.

If you are serious about being re-educated see the links below. These are outstanding examples. Now, I know your posts may not come up to their level, (mine certainly don't) but you can at least try to make it along the same lines.

https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=4334

https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=4353

https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=3736

https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=4161

https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=4165

https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=4099

And any posts made by Commissar Obamissar V, Pupovich, or Colonel 7.62, or Laika the Space Dog, as they are all exemplary.

Here's a hint about the creative process: First saturate yourself with other people's ideas, and then regurgitate them in your own fashion, or a new way. Sometimes you have to sit in front of the computer for hours in a catatonic state before you come up with something, but you will. You'll see. The mind is an amazing thing. And somewhere, in all those neurons, you will find your own personal made prog personality.

That's all. I'm done.

----

No, wait. My apologies to Comrade Elliott, Neotrotsky, Whoopie, Opiate of the People, Sister Massively Opiated and any other outstanding comrade I failed to include above.

Thank you, Leninka, for bringing this up. You are hereby appointed our acting Commissar of Housekeeping, Disappearances, Composting, Dissection, and Limo Service (while the current Commissar SMO is still at her remote dacha recovering from a case of being massively opiated).
LET THE PURGES BEGIN!

Collective denunciations, threats, stigmatizing, and faction infighting are good for keeping a healthy spirit and an unclogged digestive system.

I concur on all points and am promoting this post to the status of an official announcement.

THERE IS NO 'I' IN THE COLLECTIVE!
WE PUT THE 'U' IN GULAG!

Technically speaking, all comrades with moderator privileges, a.k.a. Commissars, are authorized to court-martial and summarily execute any non-conforming topic on the spot.

In case of reasonable doubt, banish it to Gulagotroll pending an investigation by the People's Commissar of Compassionate Impaling for the Common Good.

Those who like to post funny Obama YouTube videos, pick a thread you have already created, and continue posting those videos in it. At least that way you will create a collection of some historic interest rather than bring down the value of our Party-owned real estate.

Thank you, comrade Red Square. I am honored. I always dreamed of being a Commissarka, but I had no idea what kind of Commissarka I ought to be. But what you say is all fitting, especially the housekeeping part.

A helpful hint:

While swilling drinking Party™ approved Global Warming Vodka™ or Margaritas is generally approved, PUI* IS DEFINITELY NOT!
PUI does not help The Common Good™
PUI is not For The Children™
PUI does not Raise Awareness™

Those proletarians who cannot create a Progressive™ thought by the Collectivization of their own brain cells will be dealt with summarily.

*PUI = Progging Under the Influence.

[COLOR=#NaNNaNNaN]
Comrade Lenika,

Don't you think your being a little fascist to all the delicate proles of the world? What's that? No more chicken feed and vodka!?!


Oh erherrrmmmm sorry...


That's right you proles, listen up! When the bearded lady speaks, people listen!



[/COLOR]

Comrade Red Rooster,

I'm so mad, I flipped my wig.

Good Lenin! Put that thing back on! What are you trying to do, scare all our little Obamanite Children?

Did I get it on straight?

Comrade RR,

I just came into the kitchen to get a sleeping pill (my sleeping pill) is a glass of whey protein powder drink), and you had to make me laugh all over again! My wig will settle down just fine after I purge a few more progs. Nothing makes it settle down better.

I wonder if it would be possible to have some fun with a picture of Frances Bavier--Aunt Bea in <i>The Andy Griffith Show</i>. Just saying, as people say when they don't want any responsibility for what they're saying.

Red Square wrote:Those who like to post funny Obama YouTube videos, pick a thread you have already created, and continue posting those videos in it. At least that way you will create a collection of some historic interest rather than bring down the value of our Party-owned real estate.

This is a great idea, and I don't know why more people don't do it, especially if they hope to generate a discussion on whatever is the topic. It reduces clutter, makes certain entries easier to find (you want as many people as possible to see your work), and best of all, it serves as a testament to the glories of centralization.

As an example, anytime the First Lady makes one of her fashion statements, instead of starting a whole new blog entry, I just tack it onto this thread. The thread enjoys a temporary bump to the top and is visible to new visitors for an hour or two before it gets buried beneath a fresh avalanche of Mimeswipes, videos, and other drive-by posts related to something she wore. I notice the thread has gotten a lot of views; whereas if I made a fresh blog entry for every new fashion statement and then you added them all together, I don't think the sum would come close to even half of 12,000+; and all those entries would get scattered and lost in the great big shovel shuffle.

In fact, I wish now I'd done it with all the threads on various Obamabilia. By now we'd have a whole Obamalog full of Obamacrap for sale, all in one convenient stop for the busy shopper.

OTOH, with a subject as huge and pervasive and multi-tentacled like Global Warming, it makes sense to have more than one thread--but I don't think multiple threads are needed for, say, the Copenhagen fiasco. That's just one tentacle on the arm of the octopus.

Leninka: Remind me never to piss you off.

Comrade Pinkie,

I thought that the Trashin' the First Lady's Fashion was the example I listed, but now I see that wasn't the one. Well, no matter, now.

Comrade RR,

I love the pic you put up in your post last night so much, I am confiscating it for my avatar. Or was that my Christmas "Fistivus" present?

I LOVE IT!

THANK YOU!

Finally, a face I can proud of!

Leninka,

Love your new look!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Talk about a face that would launch a thousand ships to get the hell away from it.


I'm sorting the People's fleet as we speak.

Comrade Snoogie,

Thank you. I knew I was your type. I'm on my way to visit you, and I'm bringing 10 cans of Spam with me to make sure you are never without a Spam sandwich. Nothing quite like Spam to go with a cup of green tea.

[quote="Leninka"]
Comrade RR,

I love the pic you put up in your post last night so much, I am confiscating it for my avatar. Or was that my

Christmas

"Fistivus" present?

I LOVE IT!

THANK YOU!

Finally, a face I can proud of![/quote]

Merry Fistivus!

Leninka, your avatar leaves me speechless. Which is a first.

I'm not sure if that's a compliment. I only have Comrade Red Rooster to blame, so it's not my fault.

Oh sure blame the rooster, blame the rooster, why is it the rooster always gets the hatchet?

It's because I'm TASTY LIKE THAT! See....

Michelle wobbles my tripes, so it's a compliment. Any made progressive ought to look like a mad prog. Like Michelle.

Red Rooster is a master of face transplants. He's just modest, that's all. I hear Nanski's face is the result of an operation where he transplanted a section of the Goracle's ass and fashioned it with 5 holes (if you count each nostril) and made her lips from the stomach of Teddy Swimmer K (after he passed away-of course). Nanski is a strong believer in recycling, as you know, and RR was just the surgeon for the job.

Leninka, I'm still trying to get used to your new picture. It features in my dreams, which are not usually, er, bad.

Surgery 101.

Design: The monster must have appeal to the masses yet exemplify the lobotomy of intellect we desire. The monster cannot be too bright, yet cannot scare the living shit out of the children.

Calculation: The monster must be calculating and clever, like a CAT, the monster must not give itself away as a monster until the revolooshin is complete. Teleprompters and Bullwhips suffice, like Lenin to the diatribe of Marx or Trotsky to the Whip.

Stalin comes fast in the latter midst.

AAAAAAAAAH. . .! Too much Hope, too much Change! Especially Change! First I see the "Groupthink" section has been reordered. Now I see Leninka has changed her avatar again (though I know she's done it before) to something that isn't Lenin!

What's next? I get a response showing something that will make me go "Waaaaa?!" Like Pluto is reinstated as a planet?!

Gone for only five days and this is what I get. I need to restart myself, my binary coding needs to be recoded and expanded.

It's good to get outside of your box, Comrade Elliott. You ought to enjoy your time away from re-education camp, and have yourself some extra vodka. Vodka is always good for dealing with changes. I think this is how the "Rat Pack" handled all the changes of life.

I could use that vodka. A good memory wipe is what I need.

Elliott, have you forgotten Jiffi-Lobo? It's the prog's best friend. I have made a point of going at least once a week, for it lets me believe five impossible things before breakfast.

It's the only way that I can stomach Nanski, you know.

How about if Comrade Elliott gets himself a Winter Solstice Jiffi-Lobo special, in other words, Jiffi-Lobo with a vodka chaser.

Elliott, as a Mad Prog, I command you to hie then hence to Jiffi-Lobo and afterward pound down an entire bottle of Stoly.

It's for your own good, dammit! If you're totally insensate then Gollum will let up on you.

Make it work Theo. Make it work! For my sanity (which I remind you I've lost) make it work!

Uh, Elliott, will you tell Gollum that I'm sickly? That I have, uh, some sort of cerebral tumor and am easy pickings?

I recall the high days of Gollum in September when I was on a vacation (yes another one), and I recall that my little chats with him have enlivened my memories of the northwest. I'll always think of Gollum at the same time as the northwest.

Such fun we had, skipping through the fields of rhetoric. And there is one thing to remember about all trolls: not a single one of them can resist Pandora's Box. Not one. It's not in their nature--it's why they're trolls.

Remember our talks from earlier Theo? That will answer your question.

Red Square wrote:Thank you, Leninka, for bringing this up. You are hereby appointed our acting Commissar of Housekeeping, Disappearances, Composting, Dissection, and Limo Service (while the current Commissar SMO is still at her remote dacha recovering from a case of being massively opiated).
LET THE PURGES BEGIN!

Collective denunciations, threats, stigmatizing, and faction infighting are good for keeping a healthy spirit and an unclogged digestive system.

I concur on all points and am promoting this post to the status of an official announcement.

THERE IS NO 'I' IN THE COLLECTIVE!
WE PUT THE 'U' IN GULAG!

[HIGHLIGHT=#ffff00]Technically speaking, all comrades with moderator privileges, a.k.a. Commissars, are authorized to court-martial and summarily execute any non-conforming topic on the spot.[/HIGHLIGHT]

In case of reasonable doubt, banish it to Gulagotroll pending an investigation by the People's Commissar of Compassionate Impaling for the Common Good.

Those who like to post funny Obama YouTube videos, pick a thread you have already created, and continue posting those videos in it. At least that way you will create a collection of some historic interest rather than bring down the value of our Party-owned real estate.

AHHH!! A CAPITAL WONDERFUL IDEA, COMRADE RED!!! I will take this as permission to purge freely...lately it has been most difficult to navigate the Pages of the Cube due to endless rumaging through the meaningless rubbage! Leninka, BRILLIANT!!! SALUTE!!!
<anxiously awaits Shovelindasky's next irrelavent post>

And I thought that I'd have to study up to get up to posting YouTube videos.

STFU.

Yes, Comrade Theo, you'll need to get some more learnin' done to post a YouTube video and nothin' else. You see, it's quite complicated. I don't have time to explain it all. You'll just have to struggle through it yourself.

But to those who do post huge numbers of YouTube videos, remember that I am a very susceptible Commissar, even though I am in charge of communal impaling for the common good. But I expect, like Pooh-Bah, to be grossly insulted.

I am very humbled by the greatess contributed here. . . I shall swear to the peoples greater good, never to be caught youtubing again. Heil Königin Leninka
and the lovely gulag!

Thank you Fraulein, we must all be take on the duties of spying, reporting, and snitching on each other very seriously.

It IS for the greater good, dear Leninka. Snitching is the heart the new "change".

And let's not forget blaming. That Martha Coakley lost in MA is all the Bushitler's fault.

The progressives were blaming Coakley <i>before</i> the election.

I fear that Marcia Coakley will be blamed herself as being insufficiently rigorous in her belief in Strong Communism. After all, a good Kennedy Socialist should have been able to walk onto the debating platform on her jackboots, snap her riding crop against her jodhpurs, and demand, "You <i>will</i> vote for me!" walk off, and have it done.

Tell me that we do not eat our own.

We thrive on blame. And, really I'm quite surprised that Marcia Coakley who rivals the MTE in her masculinity didn't win over an attractive piece of beefcake.

The attractive piece of beefcake beat her. That's not bad now and in 1982, before gym membership was obligatory, was stellar.

Yes, the piece of beefcake above is neither too muscular, or too soft.

However, Comrade Theocritus, I don't want to destroy your fantasy, but is he a vegan?

Give me the look of an emaciated vegan prog, with long stringy, greasy hair. In other words, that Boulder, or Austin look. And you can tell, just by looking at him, that he is the kind of man that never questions, how it is that the woman he lives off of, earns her money, as long as she is a good bread winner. Now, that's the kind of man I want.

I know what you mean about that Austin look. The earth people. That stringy, greasy, emaciated look. There are lots of them in Santa Fe too. There are some who live in the country and a couple of times a year come into town to take a bath.

They go to a car wash, take off all their clothes, and hose each other down.

It is traumatizing, but I don't much mind. Santa Fe is a lovely place but if you go into say the outlet mall on Cerrillos, you'll find your fingers itching for your S&W. Now I'm being unkind--it's filled with very progressive people.

Who are rude thugs.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Elliott, as a Mad Prog, I command you to hie then hence to Jiffi-Lobo and afterward pound down an entire bottle of Stoly.

It's for your own good, dammit! If you're totally insensate then Gollum will let up on you.

---

Did you mean Mad or Made here, Commissar Theocritus? I'm confused. Oh...I get it, they are the same!

...Just strolling around the People's Cube, lookin' for some "trouble"...after beating The People's Blog to death, I, Pamalinsky, am lookin' for some inspiration!

I see all of my komrades are mighty busy doin' some stuff. This is exciting! I need to get busy!

Before I thrust myself into another, pristine space, other than the People's Blog, which I have successfully downgraded, I would like to take a look at my replies. (I had many! Not posts, even they were good, but replies! And, am so curious about seeing them) How do I access them? Is it possible? Is it something I actually want to see? I say YEAH! I can take it!

Please tell me how to access this info, or refer me to those who can. Sorry to be such a bother.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:
As an example, anytime the First Lady makes one of her fashion statements, instead of starting a whole new blog entry, I just tack it onto this thread. The thread enjoys a temporary bump to the top and is visible to new visitors for an hour or two before it gets buried beneath a fresh avalanche of Mimeswipes, videos, and other drive-by posts related to something she wore. I notice the thread has gotten a lot of views; whereas if I made a fresh blog entry for every new fashion statement and then you added them all together, I don't think the sum would come close to even half of 12,000+; and all those entries would get scattered and lost in the great big shovel shuffle.

In fact, I wish now I'd done it with all the threads on various Obamabilia. By now we'd have a whole Obamalog full of Obamacrap for sale, all in one convenient stop for the busy shopper.

OTOH, with a subject as huge and pervasive and multi-tentacled like Global Warming, it makes sense to have more than one thread--but I don't think multiple threads are needed for, say, the Copenhagen fiasco. That's just one tentacle on the arm of the octopus.

Leninka: Remind me never to piss you off.

Commisarka Pinkie,
I knew this about you from the start, and, I know you may have seen this already, but, an article I found from Tammy Bruce, asks the profound question..."Does Michelle Obama have the right to Bare Arms?". I think I have a link here, even though it is available in spite of me. I don't want to take my friends down this hole. But, it's there if you want. I like this girl! tammybruce.com<br>

Pam, I may be misunderstanding you. When I want to see a reply I click on the link to the reply. It's the first link in the email. But that's just how it comes out in a Mac. Don't know how it's done in Windows.

Tammy Bruce must be silenced. She is doing <i>independent thinking</i>! You know that's the most dangerous thing that a Made Prog can do, don't you? That's why we have Jiffy-Lobo.

Bruce must go. She thinks.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Pam, I may be misunderstanding you. When I want to see a reply I click on the link to the reply. It's the first link in the email. But that's just how it comes out in a Mac. Don't know how it's done in Windows.

Tammy Bruce must be silenced. She is doing <i>independent thinking</i>! You know that's the most dangerous thing that a Made Prog can do, don't you? That's why we have Jiffy-Lobo.

Bruce must go. She thinks.

Commissar, I'm not sure what it is you are misunderstanding. I have a Mac and always click on the first link when I reply. If you got several posts from the Neologism Contest from me, it's because I kept thinking of a new one and resubmitted a few times. I did think about that when I did it, but hoped, if I did it before anyone showed up...ah...that's not gonna fly!

I've contacted Bruce about Jifi-Lobo. She refused to listen to me. Hmmm, she may well be a prog after all. hmmm, hmmm, hmmm.

Oh, wait a minute, Commissar! I think I know what you are talking about. There is a place on the site where you can see how many posts you have posted. I think that's where I noticed a different "replies" count, much larger than what I receive in my own e-mail. I'll see if I can find it and let you know exactly where it is. I was just curious about what this is.

Commissar Theocritus,
Here's what I found, and here's what you do.
In this order:

Go to "Group Think"
People's Cube Forum Index
Find all posts by Pamalinsky
(It shows:)
Author: Pamalinsky
Replies: 4 million 800 thousand (kidding)
Views: 8 million (not kidding)

One cannot select the last two aforementioned categories.
What is this?
(Wouldn't you like to have a glance at those replies?)
That is what my real question was about!
Thanks, Theo!

Delving back into my computer-science days that looks like a formatting error or viewing a number with the wrong word length. The information is there, just not in a usable form.

That makes sense. Thanks! Be fun to see what's actually there, however. Whatever it is...

Because when I view The People's Blog as a forum page, I want to see my name at the top as one who should always have the last word in all things Progressive.

Good for you, Pinkie!

(Yes, Betinov is a bastard)

WHACK!!!

And that should be the last word out of Betinov for a while.

"tis but a scratch! Have at you!

What's wrong with you, Betinov? Most men like it when the woman is on top.

Most women are lighter.

(and now I'm going to die.)

(Donning his kevlar and running for the exit) Ivan, I'll bring flowers to your grave when the coast is clear.

What brought this on, Betinov? Don't you know I'm a made prog? That means as a woman, it's been a constant struggle for me to get where I am--and because I'm a Prog, I couldn't have done it without affirmative action and sleeping around with unfaithful Prog males, a few whom I widowed so I could take their Party seats. That's right--as a female Prog, I had to be forever victimized by male oppression to receive the entitlements I enjoy today.

And the victimization continues, for here you are ganging up on me and bullying me like those evil Republicans are doing to poor Elena Kagan.

You think you're the victim here, Betinov? A victim of my shovel and my boots that stomp on your smart-alecky brains? No, I'm the victim of your misogynistic neocon male oppression. You probably think I should have to work for what I want, and achieve on my own merit, like those sluts Bachmann and Palin did. How dare you suggest I should commit such an affront to the entire women's movement! Don't you realize that if all women were like them, the women's movement would no longer have reason to exist, and therefore would cease to receive funding and special protections? You know, like we don't want endangered species to repopulate too much, lest they lose their special status and the federal dollars that come with it?

Now before I denounce you as a traitorous thoughtcriminal, let us be reasonable, Betinov. No one bothered with this thread for the longest time, and I merely posted what I did because I was tired of seeing that other person's name up there all the time. You didn't mind when SHE was on top all that time. Why?

Is she lighter than me? Or is it because she's prettier than me?

(Spirit of Eddie Haskell, don't fail me now!)

I'll take option three: "she (the prole who shall not be named in your beloved presence) was of such little consequence that I failed to notice her name (which of course shall not be mentioned in the same posting with the dulcet moniker of Pinkie) at the top of the page. It was only when I saw the glorious, Prolier than Mao name of Pinkie that I visited the topic at all. You ask if she (who has no name as far as I know) is lighter than you, and I reply 'How should I know? I have never felt the weight of her (her who?) jackboot grinding shards of glass into my grey matter, so how can I compare it to the delicate hobnails of Pinkie's stylish broghans?' You ask if she (I really have no idea who this woman is) is prettier than you, and I reply 'who could possibly consider the comeliness of another when Pinkie's star is ascendant?'"

(Psst! Whoopie! Think she bought it?)

Chocolates Ivan, don't forget the chocolates.

Oh crap, she's looking right at me. Do you think she heard?

Oh, and what's this? Why, someone has left this box of vodka-filled chocolate bon-bons just sitting here open....

(Thanks, Whoopie! I take back some of the things I've said about you.)

Whoopie: Add a red headscarf and a golden shovel to that image, and I might be happy.

Betinov: Hands Brains off the chocolates. And until you make the appropriate reparations, you're no longer in the jar but in the doghouse.

Elliott: Your post goes against everything this thread was orginally about. You are hereby denounced and . . .

WHACK!!!

Pinkie dahling, a golden shovel, by all means. But please don't ask me to give you a babushka. That is so out of style. Golden boob armor is all the rage on the Paris catwalks this year. Only General Mousey Tongue has the right to be mousey. You are the queen bee of the Party, not some peasant prole. Project my dear, project. You need to step out girl and flaunt your style.

(er, ummm, I was trying to be helpful....ok, I'll be quiet and go away)

But Whoopie, my red headscarf is part of who I am. It is to me what Michelle's big spiky belt is to her. People won't recognize me without it anymore than they'd know me without my shovel.

I cannot give up my red headscarf. It used to be a kerchief around Che's neck, and as I knelt over his body, in my grief I removed it from around his neck to blow my nose with it, and then I tied it over my head where it's been ever since, like a holy relic, a talisman if you will. I feel it brings me luck.

But I say yes absolutely to the golden boob armor, I must have it. I especially love that sharp thingy right over the cleavage. That would discourage even Al Gore. Bill Clinton, not so much, but I don't mind him.

Now, do you still want to be quiet and go away, or would you like Beet of the Week? That's worth a pair of solid gold bazoombas, don't you think?

Shall we take this to another thread?

Commissarka Pinkie wrote: Elliott: Your post goes against everything this thread was orginally about. You are hereby denounced and . . .

WHACK!!!

D'oh! My bad. I was going for "This is good, I want to sit back and watch this".

Ergo. . .

Pinkie, the pretty tiara has a lovely red star on it....

Save your breath Betinov. Che's sweat stained neck scarf holds more cache' for Pinkie. She considers it her trademark. I'm glad I was able to do something fashionable with it instead of the tired old babushka look.

Maybe I'll design her some evening wear next. Something slinky to show off her curves.

Or maybe some sexy lingerie? Trade that shovel for a riding crop.

Wait! Wait! Wait! Just how did anyone get past that bit about "golden boob armor" being the latest rage. First of all, the Mother Country doesn't need boob armor. The Mother Country is a huge sow with 300,000,000 tits which cannot be armored. And in fact they must be opened up to the rest of the world.

It's just unfair for the world to have to work and be responsible and like you know have an honest government when all we have to do is do like the Feds and deliberately not enforce the laws already on the books.

This is a true progressive feint, by the way. There were 31 laws broken at Columbine. And all we made progs known that with a 32nd law it wouldn't have happened.

Comrade Whoopie wrote:Pinkie dahling, a golden shovel, by all means. But please don't ask me to give you a babushka. That is so out of style. Golden boob armor is all the rage on the Paris catwalks this year. Only General Mousey Tongue has the right to be mousey. You are the queen bee of the Party, not some peasant prole. Project my dear, project. You need to step out girl and flaunt your style.

(er, ummm, I was trying to be helpful....ok, I'll be quiet and go away)

Comrade Jar-Boy, my name is derived from a certain halitosis derived from feasting on my favorite snack food...NOT my sartorial skills or fashion sense. Comparing me, the Pet of The People™ to a peasant prole is just dumb. While I generally eschew self-aggrandization, perhaps you should reconsider how My Generalship is revered by the Kollektive:


As Mao's favorite LapPet, I have been honored as no other quadriped in the Party Elite:


Your recent poor judgment has put your political reliability into question, comrade. Straighten out and fly left, brain-boy, or I will have you swimming in my piranha tank!

Comrade General,. why are you peeing in my brain jar? I said nothing about your name, your origins, or your personal habits. The most worthy Whoopie is who you yourself quoted in this no-doubt catnip-inspired flurry of furry denouncement.

General, I was only fumbling for the words to convince Pinkie to brighten her image. I never meant to imply that you were mousey in your appearance or fashion sense.

I meant that only you have the right to be mousey as in Mousey-Tongue, your chosen name. Simply a play on words, nothing person intended or implied.

Ivan Betinov wrote:Comrade General,. why are you peeing in my brain jar? I said nothing about your name, your origins, or your personal habits. The most worthy Whoopie is who you yourself quoted in this no-doubt catnip-inspired flurry of furry denouncement.

Pardon me, comrade. Bad meds. Perhaps I instinctively responded in wrath to you because you have such a cool avatar. Sometime, you will have to run the biochemics by me again, how that jar thing works. But you seem to be happy! Perhaps you could find a smaller one for me?

Comrade Whoopie, I will sit on a cushion bearing your worthy name and reflect on the glorious coming of Next Tuesday! Thank you for your thoughtful response...you have a avatar no less cool, no less worthy, than comrade Betinov. It is most equal in every respect. And, for what it is worth, I told Trostky not to go to Mexico...but would he listen?

I only live to serve, and to help with whatever seafood testing needs require...

General, Trotsky had to go to Mexico as Nixon had to go to China and Obama had to bow to the King of Saudi Arabia. Is there a connection? Of course there is. There were 300,000,000 slaves tossed off ships from Africa to American and there are sharks still swimming the routes in search of tasty bits of jetsam.

Also the height of the Washington Monument is, in cubits, exactly the number of times that George W. Bush walked around his desk every week, except in February.

This proves, of course, that if President Obama had not been elected then the moon would have crashed into the sun, and Rosie O'Donnell would have wiped her own ass.

Ahh...and I had to go to Kunming in the spring for my fact-finding mission. Now it all makes sense.

By the way, Commissar Theocritus, would you have need for serfs to shovel Jimmy Carter Nano Rabbit droppings? I have suggested several proles who are up for minor usurpations of posting convention be condemned to a slow death assigned to community service. It would either lead to corrected behavior and greater zeal on their part, or a slow de-evolution into zombies. Either way, the Party wins.

Commissar Theocritus wrote: This proves, of course, that if President Obama had not been elected then the moon would have crashed into the sun, and Rosie O'Donnell would have wiped her own ass.

First off, which moon are you referring to? Our dusty orbiting satellite, or O'Donnell's?
Second, I thought it impossible for Rosie to wipe her butt not because she has some small Hispanic slave lock away in her closet to do such a thing (poor soul) but because her puny arms can't reach around that much mass of liberalism, hate, and gravy.

Call me impulsive for pointing out the obvious.

General M-T, as a matter of fact, I do have need for some prole to shovel nano Jimmy Carter rabbit droppings. And let me suggest is for the lesser violations. For the major ones, Bruno needs someone to shave his back and put spackle on his shoulders as a base for his pancake so he can wear a neckless and strapless Carmen Miranda dress.

Now I've never done that. I never intend to do that. Even thinking about it makes my junk nearly fall off. So I'm saving that one for the worst of the offenders.