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Lyric Competition: Let's R.O.C.K.!

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"WANT IS WEALTH
POVERTY IS PROSPERITY
SQUALOR IS LUXURY"


Pinkie has her People's Book Club.

Theo has his Poetry Competition.

But is that really, equally enough?

No, of course it's not. So I'm throwing my two beets in the pot. For equality. For Social Justice™. For The People™. And The Children™.

Okay, Comrades, no awards for this (after all, we are all most equal), but if Commissarka Pinkie deems you most equally worthy, there may be some Collective Goodness in it for you (hint hint, nudge nudge). And as a bonus, it'll let you pull your most-equal lyrics out of the gulag of The People's Karaoke. (Frankly, I think the Karaoke is unfairly shunned by many otherwise most-equal Prog Cubers.)

Now I know what many of you are asking, even if you won't admit it to each other: Why isn't R.O.C.K. doing this? Why indeed. Perhaps he has better sense. It is my understanding that R.O.C.K. has been a bit down of late – perhaps from conversing too liberally with Poe's Raven.
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Yes, I brought it up, so I will offer the first most-equal contribution. Let's start with a modification of a song sung by a singer who sounds remarkably Barry-esque but better. It's based on “Mr. Roboto”, by that flighty fella Dennis DeYoung and the boys from the river Styx:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51ybp_Y ... detailpage

Mr. 0bam0

أنا كل ما عندي حرية التجارة لالهاتف الخليوي رخيصة
الحرية لا قيمة لها أريد فقط الواقي الذكري

No one knows who I am, (hate and rage against the USA)
Mannequin of a man, (hate and rage against the producers)
With mind tuned to Islam, (Death to the US - the Great Satan)
And socialistic plan,

I've got a plan that's deep inside me bubbling from within,
My heart is shriveled, my blood is ice-cold, my brain a dustbin,
KKKonservatives say I act strangely, I'm not surprised,
They disagree with my Great Plan and from them I can't hide
I'll merely crush them – they won't survive,
My kill list enforced, they won't survive,

I'm an unfeeling lifeless ice-man you just can't get to,
I say I'll help you, social justice, while I gladly destroy,
The sheeple don't see I'm a hater, cold racist hater,
I'm the Man and you're in my hands, I'm beyond your control,
You need my control, you've too little control,
I will control, you need my control,

I have a soc'list plan, (Society, it is my enemy)
I hide behind my grin, (Freedom and thought are my enemies)
The sheeple just don't see, (Hate and rage against God and country)
My true identity,

I'll trade all my freedoms for a cheap cell phone
Gimme, gimme,
Liberty is worthless, I just want condoms
Gimme, gimme,
Tell me that you love me,
That I'm not worthless,
Tell me that you'll make the
One Two percent pay me,
(Thank you very much oh lord god 0bama,
For ensuring there won't be a doc who'll treat me)
Terrorist detainees will all be set free,
(And thank you very much my savior 0bama,
For food stamps to feed me, just keep me work-free)
Hail our lord Caesar, 0bama, our Caesar,
(Let me touch the hem of your robe)
0bama's our savior we don't need Jesus
(I wanna see you)
0bama will take us down to the beet fields
(On Leno)

The answer's plain to see,
The world needs more of me,
I choose to take your lives,
I will de-humanize,

The time is now for me, (I will turn you back to the stone age)
I destroy all with glee, (I will make you pay for all my rage)
Now you see the true me, (I will take all that you love away)
My true identity!

I'm J. Wright! Soros! Saul A.! Karl Marx! (Wormwood…)

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Dear Leader as Custaclobaroon (don't ask)

Across the musty mountains
of the morbid mistless moon
came the creaking soundless crying
of the Custaclobaroon.

His ghoulish glomy glippers
ground the ghastly glassy glen,
a dusty dribless demon
from a doomed and dreary den.

In his soulless eyes no longing,
In his bloodless heart no beat.
Through a soundless icy cutting cold
the marks of scarring feet.

A windless black surrounds him
neath foot and overhead.
He moves in shadowed sepulchers
of deathless living dead.


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About I.M. Craptek's poem " Custaclobaroon " ......

If you sang it to the tune of " When Irish Eyes Are Smiling ", you'd have something you could dance to !

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For the Glory of NextTuesday I offer:
(To the tune of Henry the 8th I am)

I'm Barry the 1st I am
Barry the 1st, I am, I am
Started voting present in 2004
Until I didn't wanna be in Senate anymore.

And every single vote was for me
Beat ol' John McCain to be the Man
That made me Barry the 1st, I am, I am
Barry the 1st, I am

Second Term- the People never learned...

I'm Barry the 1st, I am
Barry the 1st, I am, I am
Made the people even more poor
Blamed the rich like I did before

But all in all I made a lot of money
More than you will ever have
Obamacare makes you shovel ready
Useful idiots cried Yes We can!
Cuz' Barry the 1st, I am, I am
Barry the 1st, I am

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Krasnodar wrote:About I.M. Craptek's poem " Custaclobaroon " ......

If you sang it to the tune of " When Irish Eyes Are Smiling ", you'd have something you could dance to !
Now that's funny, dear Kras. Very funny. I needed that. And that dance would be a waltz.

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Commissar Redumdimski said:

"Okay, Comrades, no awards for this (after all, we are all most equal), but it'll let you pull your most-equal lyrics out of the gulag of The People's Karaoke. (Frankly, I think the Karaoke is unfairly shunned by many otherwise most-equal Prog Cubers.)"

I, Pamalinsky, say:

That's right, Redumdimski! The People's Karaoke kicks some serious butt! They are truly prolific in their creativity. Unbelievable output. They don't stop for anything. They have great heart and should be acknowledged! They regularly post very imaginative things without caring about responses. They get very few and should get more.

They are most generous in their giving without expecting anything in return. I say we all go there and acknowledge our fellow Progs with copious responses. They are an important part of us.

Yes, fellow Cubists (an art form) Let's support our wonderful People's Karaoke!

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Two things, the first addressed to Commissar Redumdimski and the second to Pamalinsky.

Redumdimski: If no awards are to be given here, then that means I can't give Beet of the Week to Subversive Skwerl for his contribution. If we could get the ghost of Patrick Swayze to sit in John Boehner's bedroom and sing that song all night, then Boehner and every last Republican will surely agree to raise taxes on every American the wealthy.

Pamalinsky: Speaking of John Boehner, supporting People's Karaoke by telling them how wonderful they are is not the Prog way. If you REALLY want to show your support for People's Karaoke--if you REALLY wants to raise everyone's awareness of how much you care about People's Karaoke--then you need to gather up a few other proles and parade naked around Boehner's office, all the while chanting, "NO CUTS TO PEOPLE'S KARAOKE!"

Or you can just sit in the basement of your parents' $450,000 McMansion and blog about the need for increased government funding to keep People's Karaoke afloat and how millions of people will die without it. But that won't get you on You Tube the way getting naked in Boehner's office will--unless, of course, you make a You Tube video of yourself sitting at the kitchen table mumbling about how we need more funding for Karaoke.

You don't have to be coherent--you just have to care!

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Comrade Redum,

Dare I say that I can't wait for the refrain featuring lyrics related to our very own dear First Horse Of The U.S.: MOO-chelle.

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Moochelle - the hell
Get your fat ass down to Taco Bell
Moochelle - the hell

Moochelle, do tell
Do you know your shape is like that bell?
Moochelle - a bell?

Tamales and lobster and tacos
Just look in a mirror, Moochelle
And do it from behind
There is something back there, dear Moochelle
Scary as hell

Moochelle - oh well
Sont des mots qui vont très bien ensemble,
Très bien ensemble

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Comrades Daddy and R.O.C.K., it is possible that even John, Paul, George, and Ringo didn't recognize their prescience when they wrote "Moochelle" those decades ago.

R.O.C.K., amazing that "Mr. Roboto" was written of you when our side despaired of ever defeating the "religious and moral people". Our prince always has his way in this world.

Well, there was that incident on Calvary and the aftermath. But look how well we're doing now.

(HA! Victory is ours! We have destroyed them along with their shining city on the hill!)

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote:If no awards are to be given here, then that means I can't give Beet of the Week to Subversive Skwerl for his contribution.
Pinkie, we all know that Current Truth™ is nimble and can change in a nanosecond. Far be it from me to refuse you from most equally applying the Beet of the Week - or your Golden Shovel of Justice - upon whomever you deem fit!

After all, we are Progs and We Care! (Is that trademarked yet?)

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Pamalinsky wrote:
Krasnodar wrote:About I.M. Craptek's poem " Custaclobaroon " ......

If you sang it to the tune of " When Irish Eyes Are Smiling ", you'd have something you could dance to !
Now that's funny, dear Kras. Very funny. I needed that. And that dance would be a waltz.
Comradette Pamy and Comrade Kras, I danced the Jig with me, myself, and I until we all collapsed in ecstacy, pondering Comrade Craptek's comely Custaclobaroon, APBUH!

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Sugar Daddy Bear wrote:Comrade Redum,

Dare I say that I can't wait for the refrain featuring lyrics related to our very own dear First Horse Of The U.S.: MOO-chelle.
Might I suggest something to the tune of "Mr. Ed"?

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Ah... Most equal works... We would be most honored if you posted these amongst our humble contributions in Peoples Karaoke

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Pamalinsky: Speaking of John Boehner, supporting People's Karaoke by telling them how wonderful they are is not the Prog way. If you REALLY want to show your support for People's Karaoke--if you REALLY wants to raise everyone's awareness of how much you care about People's Karaoke--then you need to gather up a few other proles and parade naked around Boehner's office, all the while chanting, "NO CUTS TO PEOPLE'S KARAOKE!"

You don't have to be coherent--you just have to care!
Oh yes... This would be most equal..... Bring Comrade Putout too...


And next Thursday we would gladly join you too as that's when we get deloused in the gulag.

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Tune of "Ghost Riders in the Sky"

Ghost Progs™

A new made Prog went strollin' out one dark and windy day,
Upon a bench he rested as he went along his way,
When all at once a snarling mob of red eyed libs he saw,
A-marchin' through the filthy streets and toward a crowded mall.
Yippee-yi-o, yippee-yi-ay; we're Ghost Progs and we're high.

Their bongs were still on fire and their heads were hard as steel,
Their jeans were black and filthy and their bad breath he could feel,
A bolt of fear went through him as they lumbered slowly by,
For he saw the marchers comin' hard and heard their mournful cry.
Yippee-yi-o, yippee-yi-ay, we're Ghost Progs and we're high.

Their faces gaunt, their eyes were blurred, and shirts all soaked with sweat.
They're marchin' hard to close the bank, but they ain't closed it yet,
They're bound to march forever cause Utopias' real high,
They suck their crack pipes frantically like children hear them cry.
Yippee-yi-o, yippee-yi-ay, we're Ghost Progs and we're high.

As the vermin lurched on by him, he heard one shout “Hey Man.”
March with us dude, the one per cent are stealing People's land.
Yo bourgeois change your ways today, or with us you must walk.
We're purgin' all Rethuglikans and their regressive talk.
Yippee-yi-o, yippee-yi-a, we're Ghost Progs and we're high.

They're marching hard forever toward that place that's such a lie,
The Greater Goods' they're Marxist dream, correctness is their cry.
Praise be to Him the People's Truth, the Commissar of Hope,
Archaic values going down, a century of dope.
Yippee-yi-o, yippee-yi-a, we're Ghost Progs and we're high.

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Hey Pinkie! Way to take it to the max! Excellent (as always) "advice."

Okay, I think I got the "Caring™" thing down.
Next up: The "Walking Naked™" thingy. I, I, I think I can do that! My Self-Esteem™ is way up there now. Because of you.

Gotta contact Comrade Putout now! I'll get back to you on this.

Hey, um, er, thanks.

Your pal, Pamalinsky

Comrades R.O.C.K., Crap and Subversive. It's official! You are all certifiable. You inspire me. Keep up the good work!

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Here I stand, bills in hand
I can never pay
No more job - I've been canned
Obamacare's what they say

Hey! You've got to spread the wealth around
Hey! You've got to spread the wealth around

Lost my car - lost my wife
Feeling very strange
Why should I even try
Where's my hope and change?

Hey! You've got to spread the wealth around
Hey! You've got to spread the wealth around

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Anyer Marx wrote:Might I suggest something to the tune of "Mr. Ed"?

You may and thanks for the suggestion. Ergo, my submission:


A Horse is a Horse, of course of course
And no one can talk to Da Horse of course
That is, of course, unless the Horse is the bon vivant MOO-chelle

Go right to main course and ask the Horse
She'll give you some answer that'll cause remorse
She's always on a twaddlin' course
Gawk at the corpulent MOO-chelle

Her worshippers yakkity yak a streak and waste your time of day
But MOO-chelle will never speak before she phagocytotically surrounds her buffet

A Horse is a Horse, of course, of course
And this one'll talk till your brain explodes
You never heard of a talking First Horse?
Well listen to this:

"Let them eat cake! Barroke! MORE LOBSTER, TACOS AND VACATIONS!!!"

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Barry Sprat could eat no fat
His wife could eat no lean
And so betwixt the two of them
They licked the platter clean.

16336-MicheleScarfing.jpg

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote:If no awards are to be given here, then that means I can't give Beet of the Week to Subversive Skwerl for his* contribution.
Image * - still a gal unless and until fearless leader proclaims gender as an irrational construct or offensive to some protected class.

Image Grateful to know I may be beet worthy but it is all for the Glory of NextTuesday ™ The real reward lies in achieving true shovel-readiness.


Pamalinsky wrote: [...] Comrades R.O.C.K., Crap and Subversive. It's official! You are all certifiable. You inspire me. Keep up the good work!
I bask in your collective awesome Comrade.

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This thread just like listening to old soviet state radio.
Make me feel like getting hammered...... & dancing...

tumblr_m1rvtsEQiD1rsjv78o1_250.gif

And while we're showcasing new tunes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=p ... E91uECdnmI

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Groucho Marxist wrote:Ah... Most equal works... We would be most honored if you posted these amongst our humble contributions in Peoples Karaoke
Mr. 0bam0: Done!

And with another contribution more equally applied here and there, instead of where it first was This Last Tuesday, from Theo's Poetry Competition:

Make Sure that They're Hated

(Sung to the tune of The Offspring's “Come Out and Play” (or “Keep ‘em Separated”))
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFwkv14 ... detailpage

I like the latest trashin'
I'm society's disease
Got sheeple chantin' on their way to the soup line
Duped to submission with the greatest of ease

Politicos are playin' the same game as before
Take from those who have it and we'll even the score
Keep more of it for me and then we'll promise some more
We're gonna take it all, we're your pal, we're the boss, facts we'll gloss

Hey! Man you makin' more than me?
Take ‘im out
Ya gotta make sure that he's hated
Hey! Man you think different than me?
Take ‘im out
Ya gotta make sure he's berated

Hate, lies, death, we don't mind
Decency is dumb and morality's a cri-i-ime,
Hey rich man, take you away!

By the time you recognize me, you're already too late
You're just a miserable slave now
Too slow and dumb to see it's you're fate

We've cooked your goose for years but from slumber you won't wake
So because we despise you all from you we will take
We're gonna bash you up, smash you up, trash you down, in the ground

Our never-ending spree of theft and envy and hate
We've fed you rope we use, tie you up, on our stake, you will bake

Hey! Man you don't talk just like me?
Take ‘im out
You know that honky's just a hater
Hey! Man your skin's a little paler?
String ‘im up
He's an oppressor and a raper

Capital is just a crime
If you got anything then hand it over ‘cause it's mi-i-ine
Successful, now that's a crime!

We always play the same game that we've played before,
We'll redistribute crumbs while for ourselves we take more
We'll strip you of your wealth
And we'll even the score
Redistributive justice do what we command
Then bow your knee in thanks and kiss the gun in our hand

Hey! Man you not worshippin' me?
Take ‘im out
You gotta get indoctrinated
Hey! Man you got some pocket change?
Take it out
You gotta feed my revenue stream

Hey! You don't pay enough
A penny in your hand, I'll take that for my money trough
Hey sheeple, what's yours is mine!

- And – Bonus lyrics for extra-joyous Collective Communal singing!

Just stole another election
It's all in a day's work
My pals Saul and Karl I'm in their classroom
I'm learning to kill the capit'list jerk

My friend George S. smiled at me
He makes me feel like a man
We worship the same lord with glee
Feel Satan's power when I'm shaking his hand

I am your transformation
To the promised land
No one could do it before me
Only I have the master plan

All our grabbing at other's power and wealth
We're gonna bash it up, trash it up, cash ‘em out, spit ‘em out

America,
I will love you,
When you're cold and dead
Then I will love you just fi-i-ine

Liberty,
Kill you today!
We don't need you no more
You better get out of our way-ay-ay
Hey freedom,
You're dead today!

I am your saving power
Can't tell you where I'll take you
But it's Utopia I promise

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Dig4Utopia wrote:This thread just like listening to old soviet state radio.
Make me feel like getting hammered & dancing...
Comrade D4U, We're crankin' out the jams for collective indoctrination edification and drunken orgyistic state-glorifying dancing!

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Comrade D4U provided a true and accurate correctly Proggish rendition of Caesar 0bama's new theme song, but on those occasions when more pomp and circumstance may be called for, we have an alternative.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=p ... tll8ioM4rY

John Carpenter's theme of thirty-one years ago does a brilliant job of evoking the feelings I have about our new 0bamanation. In fact, it would make a great new “Hail to the Chief” theme song as we continue our Fundamental Transformation™:

Hail savior 0bama who blessed us with himself
Hail 0bama! We all bow only to him.
Hail lord 0bama we implore you for your help
To rescue us from liberty's unfair blight.
Yours is the way that leads us FORWARD!™ to our salvation
Only your plan can guide us in our dark night,
You are the 0ne who will transform this sad nation,
With the great power of your glorious might!

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Hail savior 0bama who blessed us with himselfHail 0bama!
We all bow only to him.Hail lord 0bama we implore you for your help
To rescue us from liberty's unfair blight.
Yours is the way that leads us FORWARD!™ to our salvation
Only your plan can guide us in our dark night,
You are the 0ne who will transform this sad nation,
With the great power of your glorious might!

Comrade Redum,

This very well may be a suitable replacement for that antiquated, archaic relic we used to sing in skool called "The National Anthem". We could call this "Ode To The One™: A Song Of Reverence".

I can visualize it now: kindergartners bowing on their prayer rugs chanting in glorious unison with their shrill little voices praises for the only One™ who can save them from themselves.

Come O harbinger of the Anti-Christ and mark the way for your inevitable destruction.

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Sugar Daddy Bear wrote:This very well may be a suitable replacement for that antiquated, archaic relic we used to sing in skool called "The National Anthem". We could call this "Ode To The One™: A Song Of Reverence".
Comrade Daddy, a most equal suggestion! This is a logical follow-on for our little crumb-crunchers with soon-to-be federally provided prayer rugs (with 0bama's picture?), particularly as they are, in correctly statist public school systems, being indoctrinated to worship "Barack Hussein 0bama, mmm-mmm-mmm!" I suppose the message is that he tastes better than the Moochelle-approved school lunch menu, soon to be expanded to include breakfast and dinner, to minimize exposure to evil, possibly thoughtcriminal (read, non-statist drone) parental units. Prior to the full-time feral federal creches.

And while I cannot claim to know 0bama's ultimate role in the play of history, I'm sure he'd make a fine puppet of a False Prophet. I can't imagine the Beast (Mahdi?) being as brainless and incompetent, sans TelePrompTer.

Oh wait. Scratch that last. I just realized that 0bama's ego, while continuously writing checks that his purely imagined "competence" can't cash, would never stand for someone being given preference before him, even though he bows and apologizes for America to every tin-plated dictator he can rush to.

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Commissar Redumdimski wrote:Comrade Daddy, a most equal suggestion! This is a logical follow-on for our little crumb-crunchers with soon-to-be federally provided prayer rugs (with 0bama's picture?), particularly as they are, in correctly statist public school systems, being indoctrinated to worship "Barack Hussein 0bama, mmm-mmm-mmm!" I suppose the message is that he tastes better than the Moochelle-approved school lunch menu, soon to be expanded to breakfast and dinner, to minimize exposure to evil, possibly thoughtcriminal (read, non-statist drone) parental units. Prior to the full-time feral federal creches.

And while I cannot claim to know 0bama's ultimate role in the play of history, I'm sure he'd make a fine puppet of a False Prophet. I can't imagine the Beast (Mahdi?) being as brainless and incompetent, sans TelePrompTer.

Oh wait. Scratch that last. I just realized that 0bama's ego, while continuously writing checks that his purely imagined "competence" can't cash, would never stand for someone being given preference before him, even though he bows and apologizes for America to every tin-plated dictator he can rush to.

Comrade Redum,

It is no surprise how the minature future Stalins, Lenins and Marxes are being trained and indoctrinated into The Religion Of Pieces everday at taxpayers' expense in the Ministry Of Unionized Propaganda Training Centers formerly known as skools. And why not? Christianity has proven to be a failure, along with smaller government, personal responsibility and kkkapitalism. It also doesn't conform to the Current Truth™ either and as such must be terminated.

Prayer rugs will be provided to the little worshippers at taxpayers' expense, as well as Korans, but will not be considered a government-established religion because it lines up with the Current Truth™ and tenets of the political zeitgeist along with political korrektness. However, a picture of Ceasar O'bama on the rugs will not be permitted as per Sharia law, but there will be taped adhan of Ceasar "muezzin" O'bama singing the "most beautiful noise in the world" to the young followers. And they will be permitted to say, "mmm mmm M!" at the end.

Of course no one knows Ceasar O'bama's place in history, but we can agree that he has a significant role as he is making history while he rewrites and distorts it at the same time with lies, slanders and calumnies, which are completely acceptable in these Last Days This Tuesday™. His ultimate "apology" will be castrating Amerika and then holding up the severed genatalia Janetalia to the world to behold.

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Oh Bear, your observations of the New Soviet Youth are of course sweet music to my addled mind. And thank you for the refresher on Sharia law, of which insufficient knowledge will, if not now then very soon in our Progressive World of This Tuesday™, require at least denouncement, or more likely, beheading.

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We do see and agree that the appointed Caesar-puppet 0bama has wormed his way into history in a tragic sense, as all the long line of propped-up power-hungry dictatorial empty-headed self-deifying society destroying haters do.

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I remember one time when Comrade Pinkie thought I was beet beat worthy.

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Yeah, Capt. Commie,

Me. too. Not so sure what to say about this. Letting it slide for now.

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C.C. and P'sky, Pinkie did a Golden Shovel of Justice hit-n-run to this thread.

Will she return? She should know she's welcome in our warm collective embrace.

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R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Moochelle - the hell
Get your fat ass down to Taco Bell
Moochelle - the hell

Moochelle, do tell
Do you know your shape is like that bell?
Moochelle - a bell?

Tamales and lobster and tacos
Just look in a mirror, Moochelle
And do it from behind
There is something back there, dear Moochelle
Scary as hell

Moochelle - oh well
Sont des mots qui vont très bien ensemble,
Très bien ensemble
R.O.C.K.


I have to tell you I laughed my "thing from behind" off while reading your most eloquent lyric. Perfect, perfect lyric.


In addition, the last two lines are even more equal! I like the way you kept the integrity of the original song.


You're a good man, R.O.C.K. You have a fan in me.

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* bows humbly, and yet - much like Dear Leader in the mirror - adjusts his crown *

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Ah, Subversive Skwerl--my apologies for getting the pronoun wrong. I'm happy for the rare opportunity to bestow upon a fellow female comrade Pinkie's prestigious Beet of the Week Award!
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And for your mother:

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Of course, mothers tend to be females, too, and ALWAYS get the bumpersticker. But don't get me wrong: A mother's love is no substitute for a government program.

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Comrades,

May I suggest the blanket hornpipe as a possible alternative to the "jig" or "waltz?"

Oh yeah, and ANY folk-dancing. (It is all incomprehensible to me) I mean, heel-toe, toe-heel, clap-clap, elbow in, elbow out, there are just so many things you can do with human body parts, repeat!, I just don't get it, I just don't) And, don't forget the Mexican Hat Dance! It is infernally eternally embedded in my mind till the day I die!

The key word here is "REPEAT!" I recall an observation of someone who, on stage, kept repeating the same stupid physical pattern over and over again (was it the Hokie-pokie?) until people applauded, "thinking" because it was repeated, it must be good! Yeah, this guy is good! Sound familiar?

With all due respect to alleged folk-dancers, for which I have none, what the hell are you guys doing? Have you no shame?Also, I remember way back when I landed in Mexico City when I was greeted by the dreaded Mariachi Band! A traumatic event! Please, help me to understand.

Just trying to add to the fun.

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Frankly (Bawney), I'm becoming a bit concerned with this use of gender terms, such as "mother" and "female". Why, right here in my general neck o' the woods neighboring properly progressive Washington State is eliminating the words "bride" and "groom" from marriage certificates! And the same goes for "husband" and "wife".

Obviously, "My Child is Beet of the Week" is appropriately gender-neutral, but awarding said bumpersticker to a Cubist's "mother" reeks of decadent capitalist sexism. Should the award not more appropriately be given to one's "Parent"??

We shall deal with references to the Motherland next week...

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Rock in the USSA, not only have you not been paying attention these past four years, but you have just demonstrated why old white men like you are so utterly useless.

There are mothers, and then there's the government. For everything else, there's . . . well, the government.

WHACK!!!

You're no better than a fish on a bicycle.

Furthermore, you disgust me.

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Comrade R.O.C.K., while we Progs are correctly ever sensitive to gender, color, class, and dog-whistle context, is it not enough to be a most equal participant breathing the same equal air as the Commissarka and seeing the sun glint off her Golden Shovel of Justice as she presents the most equally prestigious Beet of the Week Award?

Or would you prefer her shovel find its way back into that divot in your cranium that is suspiciously shaped in the same curve as the edge of her blade?

Ahh... I see that as I was slowly typing (Jiffy-Lobo™s have that effect on me) the good Commissarka let her shovel speak!


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Really, R.O.C.K., you should be ashamed (if not denounced). "Mommy"? Come now. Is that appropriately gender-neutral?

In fact, why would you ever run screaming to a biological parental unit at all? It would be appropriate, as does Julia, to run screaming to your TRUE PARENT, Santa Caesar 0bama (even if he didn't build you), or your nearest 0bamadon'tcare waiting room, or even the gender-neutral "government".

On reflection, you may need Pinkie's Golden Shovel of Correction applied to your cranium again, followed by another trip to your local Jiffy-Lobo™ station.


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Comrade R.O.C.K., we're all proud Progs here, collectively feeling warm and fuzzy about ourselves, particularly after fixing the 2012 election re-electing our savior Barack Hussein 0bama mmm-mmm-mmm. Stop hyperventilating. Just let your Inner Comrade flow forth from the core of your being as you focus on the Current Truth™, and everything will be fine.

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote: And for your mother:

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YAY! I'm a Beet!

Of course, mothers tend to be females, too, and ALWAYS get the bumpersticker. But don't get me wrong: A mother's love is no substitute for a government program.

I patiently wait Clueless Fearless Leader's decree: Henceforth the terms 'woman' and 'mother' will be replaced with non-governmental birthing units ™

The brave new world beckons!


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SubSkwerl and R.O.C.K. -

Quiet you two!

Keep talking and she'll come wielding her shovel for sure.

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And now, rescued from the gulag of forgotten favorites, another fab Collective Party Smash-Up!
Inspired by an observation posted by Tovarich

Sung to the Dead Kennedys' “California Uber Alles” – With extra verses for special extended joy!

California Uber Alles.mp4

President 0bama

I am president 0bama
Regulations to destroy you
Businessman kneel before me

If you're here illegally
Smile boy, you're my best friend
If you hate the USA
Work with me to bring its end
Together we will bring its end!

I will tax you
Hate production
My way will only
Lead to destruction
Been my one dream
All my life
It's my true scheme
No hope just strife

I'll send my troops break your door down
Haul you away in the dark of night
You will bow to my master plan
Love my government's guiding hand
Closed minds are the kind I need
Ignorance on which I feed
No profit for you just me
Everything is mine you see,
You are all now mine you see!

You're subversive
You're not for me
You'll be silenced
Unless you adore me
You can trust me
I'm your savior
Just four more years
I just need four more

Now two thousand thirteen's here
Your demise is drawing near
For the land I love to hate
You chose me and it's too late
You have sealed your deadly fate
Your nation's no longer great
With my change I'll bury you
Fundamentally transform
Poverty is your reward
It's my only true reform
Health care is my Trojan horse
See how now your life is mine
If you think health care is free
It's for sure you've got no mind

I won't tell you
Media's quiet
You are in for huge hellish change
It's my nation
I control you
Do as I say
Or I'll destroy you

Class envy
Racial hatred
All the tools I use against you
I won't tell you
Stupid peasants
Media's quiet
Just like I like it

You will have no
God before me
Lower seas now
Hope and change are free
My anointing
Heal disease yo
I take you FORWARD!™

I'm your ruler
I'm your god now
Bow before me
I'm your only law


 
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