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Minitruth Flash: Dear Leader to Keep More Promises!

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For Immediate Release to More Equal Inner-Party Members:

After setting new presidential standards in honesty and integrity by keeping promises regarding such issues as Obamacare, transparency, Guantanamo, civil liberties and post racial harmony, Dear Leader asks you to trust him yet again by supporting his limited action against Syrian dictator Assad!

Let Dear Leader be clear, there will be NO BOOTS ON THE GROUND! Only tentacles and shoeless fish people. The elder gods led by Lord Cthulhu will be joining the double top-secret, classified coalition of hundreds of countries, kingdoms, realms and now, dimensions. Truly the greatest military coalition the world has ever known.

End transmission...

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According to Comrade Secretary Heinz-Kerry, the War for Peace in Syria will be only an unbelievably teensy tinsy, widdle bitty thing anyway.

Comrade bama chose well in choosing Comrade Heinz-Kerry for Secretary of State!



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Speaking softly, and carrying an unbelievably small stick...that we might throw sometime next week. With unbelievable emphasis.

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INGSOC wrote: .... The elder gods led by Lord Cthulhu will be joining the double top-secret, classified coalition of hundreds of countries, kingdoms, realms and now, dimensions. Truly the greatest military coalition the world has ever known.

End transmission...
All that should be necessary is one look at the stern and menacing image of dear leader supporter and French President Comrade Francois Hollande (stated in order of importance) and the entire middle east will be running for the hills. Again.

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State Department issues Clarification:


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