[ominous drone in background] Nancy Pelosi warns that 500 million Americans lose their jobs each month [cut from Pelosi video "500 million Americans lose their jobs"]. Our research indicates that the numbers are actually much higher. Because of Bush's refusal to sign the Kyoto Protocol [b/w picture of Bush sneering], as many as [closeup of toddler with dazed expression on face] one billion American children face unemployment because of the absence of Green™ industries that [slowly zoom in on picture of Algore looking serious] Al Gore would have created by executive order.

But [orchestral crescendo of Soviet national anthem in background] America has voted for Hope™ and Change™, and now [Obama smiling, waving to crowd of enthusiastic supporters] President Obama promises to mandate that the Children™ be put to work usefully fulfilling their duty to the state by working in Safe™ Children's™ factories [mother hands lunchbox to child in overalls, kisses him on forehead, child dashes eagerly into factory and joins line of happy children punching time cards] producing Green™ products that will save the planet. Thanks to Obama, 800 billion jobs will be created or saved by his economic stimulus package, but [music stops - picture of senators in senate chamber] only if it passes in the Senate.

Call [elderly man on telephone] your senator today, and urge her or him to pass President Obama's economic stimulus package today. Do it...[zoom in on still picture of happy girl with pigtails in worker's overalls] for the Children™!

Paid for by giveobamaachancetotryouthisnewideasthathavealwaysfailedinthepast.org.

I know where Pelosi got that 500 million jobs number from. She's talking about the 10 ACORN people who registered to vote under 500 million different names in the battleground states. So she's right about the number of jobs lost, she just neglected to mention that they were seasonal jobs for the election campaign only. But, Obama DID create them and he can certainly do it again!