After being arrested Mr. Lynn Burgher an unemployed man with a College degree in Transgendered Eskimo Lesbian Studies claims he was tortured by police in a manner similar to waterboarding. "I was at the Occupy site demanding that the Government pay off my $75,000 dollar student loan as it has been difficult to find a job even with my valuable degree" Mr. Burgher stated, "And all of the sudden the police just arrested me out of the blue while I was conducting a little private business of my own behind a tree".

Mr. Burgher then related that was just the beginning of his ordeal. "Next thing you know I am in the local jail holding area waiting to be processed in and then these two big police officers grab me and order me to strip naked" a visibly shaken Mr. Burgher began to say as he recalled the events. "And then they just dragged me into a small metal cube surrounded by three thin steel walls and ordered me to stand there....naked". Asked to further describe the torture area Mr. Burgher further elaborated. "It was nothing that I had ever seen before, it had this weird looking nozzle thing in the middle wall that was just above my head and two dial looking things in the middle area" he stated. "It also had in the middle of the dial area a metal dish that held a white cake like substance, I never saw anything like that thing before".

Mr. Burgher then claims the two officers shouted at him, " Well what are you waiting for?" further confusing him. "I had no idea what they wanted from me at that point" he said. Being unable to understand what the officers wanted Mr. Burgher claims one of the officers then reached in and turned one of the dials and soon Mr. Burgher thought he was drowning. "All of this water started all of the sudden just pouring out from the nozzle" he stated, "I thought this was it they are going to drown me". Mr. Burgher said he just closed his eyes at that time and was waiting for the water to rise to finish him off when all of the sudden the police attacked him with a scrub brush. " I yelled STOP but they kept scrubbing away on my naked body and they also grabbed that white looking cake thing and started to rub that thing all over me". Mr Burgher had to stop talking for few moments and compose himself. "Never in a million years did I think I'd ever see such a horrid place as that torture room" he said softly.

When questioned about Mr. Burgher allegations local police spokesman stated that it was normal policy to arrest people for public urination and that having inmates take a shower and using soap before being processed into jail was normal procedure.

When informed of the police response to his allegations Mr. Burgher stated, "What the heck is a shower and this soap thing that they are talking about?".

He's LUCKY to have survived. Adolf Hitler gave showers. Look what he accomplished. It's shocking to hear that the Polizei in Amerikka have resorted to such brutality.

My office was just looking for a specialist to handle transgendered eskimo lesibian claims against the government, but it seems this one is going to be incarcerated for a while. We'll just have to continue to hire contractors to overcharge the taxpayers for the same service.

I have some wonderful news for Mr. Lynn Burgher. His degree in Transgendered Eskimo Lesbian Studies is easily transferable into Social Work employment.

In fact he might be able to skip straight up to top level management. He is definitely the caliber of person who can go a long way in a Child Welfare agency.

I work with schizophrenics. Most of them are too nice to work for CPS.

Truncation confusion: The program was originally conceptualized as "Crap On Wall Street" [COWS]. While working through the white house brain trust/pin ball machine the name was changed and shortened to "Occupy___" as though that was an end in itself. Wrong game, wrong end.

Protestor should report violation to Dear Leader. I heard he is busy at tailgate party putting out fire in battery powered clown car, while fans are dismissive of pencil-necked gay communist body double at Army/Navy game.

I heard that Dear Leader promises job in military for Sangusky.

Just a suggestion simple offhand comment to any of my our More Politically-Connected Comrades:

Comrade Burgher owns has been granted a coveted University Degree in the prestigious field of Transgendered Eskimo Lesbian Studies (May Allah Bless This Area Of Study) - and from a "Top-3 Program" in that field, I hear.

However, Comrade B could easily possibly be denounced for failing to apply for any Highly Respected Position in "Social Work" at any of the many Peoples' Collectives. God Allah Gaia Knows that almost every Collective is eagerly seeking to spend the free federal grant money identify viable candidates for this selfless service profession.

Apparatchik Unkulturny wrote:Just a suggestion simple offhand comment to any of my our More Politically-Connected Comrades:

Comrade Burgher owns has been granted a coveted University Degree in the prestigious field of Transgendered Eskimo Lesbian Studies (May Allah Bless This Area Of Study) - and from a "Top-3 Program" in that field, I hear.

However, Comrade B could easily possibly be denounced for failing to apply for any Highly Respected Position in "Social Work" at any of the many Peoples' Collectives. God Allah Gaia Knows that almost every Collective is eagerly seeking to spend the free federal grant money identify viable candidates for this selfless service profession.

Yanno Comrade Unkulturny, I had an epiphany some time ago about the Orwellian concept of "Thought Crimes", which I guess it's OK to be held responsible for your own thoughts (especially if you type them online).

But with the advent of CPS, you don't even have to have your own thought crimes any more.

Now, you can be crucified for OTHER PEOPLE'S Thoughts-

[highlight=#ffff00]Whatever a CPS skank THINKS, imagines or even "have concerns" will be used against you in an unconstitutional court of NO Due Process.[/highlight]

Let us all hope that Mr. Burgher can put this horrid episode behind him and put that Degree of his soon to good use. So many need his talent in his field.

All I can say is that, while it would be delightful to aid Ms Peloskovich in her experiencing all that life has to offer, my left nut is a high price.

I might consider a left-side pubic hair. Maybe even two.