Just a brief update on Ted Kennedy, today marks the 42nd day of Senator Edward Kennedy's sobriety.

Let's all pray for our comrade in hopes that he stays sober.

EMBEDDED IMAGE NO LONGER AVAILABLE

Comrade, I hate to tell you this but Commissar Kennedy was embalmed with 190 proof Everclear, thus ensuring that he will stay at his usual blood alcohol level that he maintained while working in the Seante.

Sorry that you didn't get the memo, but as Obama stated in one of his staged spontaneous town hall meetings: “It's the Post Office that's always having the problems!”

And if he doesn't stay sober, IT'S BUSH'S FAULT!

Praise Lenin!!

Comrade Kennedy is in a better place now. Now, he and Mary Jo can take long moonlit drives together and go for a midnight swim whenever they want.

Proletarian Robot wrote:Comrade, I hate to tell you this but Commissar Kennedy was embalmed with 190 proof Everclear, thus ensuring that he will stay at his usual blood alcohol level that he maintained while working in the Seante.

It is of some comfort to know that Comrade Kennedy is still there, in spirits so to speak....

...thus ensuring that he will stay at his usual blood alcohol level that he maintained while working in the Seante.

Actually, The People's Medical Commisar has discovered the real reason he died. There was too much blood in his alcohol stream.

It has been said that nobody knew Ted Kennedy was an alcoholic until he showed up sober one day.

Marshal Pupovich wrote: It is of some comfort to know that Comrade Kennedy is still there, in spirits so to speak....

Stalin for Time wrote: Actually, The People's Medical Commisar has discovered the real reason he died. There was too much blood in his alcohol stream.

Stop it! My sides are going to split!

Comrade Infidel,

Kennedy never got sober, he's merely passed out. We "buried" him to hide such an embarrassment.

Commissar_Elliott wrote: Stop it! My sides are going to split!

Comrade Infidel,

Kennedy never got sober, he's merely passed out. We "buried" him to hide such an embarrassment.

I think they should have just done the "Weekend at Bernies" thing, instead of burying him. Just prop him up somewhere in the Senate chamber.

I think Massachusetts should have passed a law declaring a cardboard cutout of Kennedy to be alive, and then appoint someone to cast votes at the appropriate time, on the condition that they vote dem. Heck, they keep changing their law about senators to satisfy the Kennedy urge anyway.

Actually I never got the memo that Comrade Kennedy's lifeforce was due to be redistributed, and that he had ran out of Time. In fact there is a hefty allocation of Time for Comrade Kennedy. Hrmmm much investigating to do! Somebody screwed up!

Infidel Castrate wrote: I think they should have just done the "Weekend at Bernies" thing, instead of burying him. Just prop him up somewhere in the Senate chamber.

Something like this?

Here lies Swimmer Ted,
His ashes are pickled in Gin,
In life he was inebriated,
In death he's toxic waste.

Leninka wrote:Here lies Swimmer Ted,
His ashes are pickled in Gin,
In life he was inebriated,
In death he's toxic waste.

Leninka, I denouce you for makinga poem that doesn't rhyme a poem that made me laugh a poem about Kennedy that doesn't mention Mary Jo a poem that doesn't redistribute attention to all glorious Kennedy's and what they have done to further the glorious Marxist goals.

Comrades!

Glorious news!
Comrade Ted Kennedy had an IV line hooked up from his grave to Brother John's Eternal Flame.
There was enough Everclear in his veins to light it for the next hundred years!

This should put an end to the naysayers who said Ted shouldn't have been buried in Arlington.

RedBear wrote:

Leninka wrote:Here lies Swimmer Ted,
His ashes are pickled in Gin,
In life he was inebriated,
In death he's toxic waste.

Leninka, I denouce you for makinga poem that doesn't rhyme a poem that made me laugh a poem about Kennedy that doesn't mention Mary Jo a poem that doesn't redistribute attention to all glorious Kennedy's and what they have done to further the glorious Marxist goals.

Thank you Comrade RedBear,

I pondered for many loving hours of remembrance to come up with just the right words, not!

Comrade Laika,

Do you suppose Everclear would be good for the Swimmer's IV?

Scratch the above, my short term memory loss got the best of me. How about some healing waters from Poucha Pond?