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Red Alert: Cain is Able to Lure Minorities from Progressivim

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Comrades,

This is a RED ALERT:

We all know from the wonderful sermons of Reverend Wright that Cain slew Able, so we must mobilize against the pernicious claims by the Right-Wing Tool, Herman Cain, that Cain is Able to become President by not only capturing the Tea-Party-Crackers' votes but also by luring minorities traditionally loyal to Progressivism to vote for him instead. Does he plan to offer free Godfather's Pizza to those who otherwise would vote in loyal lockstep for me and my fellow progressives? What's worse, Cain doesn't even use a teleprompter.


We must do all we can to discredit Herman Cain.

--Fearless Leader


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Is it possible that one of our biggest groups of oppressed could be swayed by this UNCLE TOM? If so, we had better mobilize against this Cain pronto!

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“The blacks, those magnificent examples of the African race who have maintained their racial purity thanks to their lack of an affinity with bathing, have seen their territory invaded by a new kind of slave: the Portuguese. The contempt and poverty unites them in the daily struggle, but the different way of dealing with life separates them completely;the black is indolent and a dreamer; spending his meager wage on frivolity or drink; the European has a tradition of work and saving, which has pursued him as far as this corner of America and drives him to advance himself, even independently of his own individual aspirations.”

- Che Guevara, The Motorcycle Diaries

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Image Herman Cain - The Godfather - Petting Cat

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Image I'm very much looking forward to the headline that reads "Cain Slays Unable" in November of 12 Herman intends to make the FairTax priority one in his administration, that's all I need to know about him.
Image Now he needs to just go back to his "window" as Mr Soros' website suggested

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Image Herman Cain - The Godfather - "I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse."

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We know his parents raised Cain, and he's probably doing likewise; so we need to get our opposition research into high gear. I worry that he may adopt "Cain is Able" as his campaign slogan, which could prove to be more catchy than "Yes We Can" or "Si Se Puede." He may well be the most dangerous candidate to be nominated to run against us.



My intelligence sources tell me that Rethuglican insiders are saying, "Sarah Palin is awesome but unable to win; Chris Christie is able but won't run, but Cain is Able."
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We'll have to counter with the meme "Cain is not Able." Get it? All we need to do is quote Genesis and even those on the Religious Right will say, "Wow, Fearless Leader really knows the Bible well, so we'll vote for him." Since Cain slew able, then, ipso facto (that's lawyer speak, which means "ipso facto") Cain cannot be Able. Who can dispute such theological correctness? Thus, Cain is Unable.

Now I did notice that someone in this thread lapsed into a thought-crime by using the epithet "Unable" to implicitly identify me. I want that person to know that you will soon receive a visit from the Thought-Crime Warden. On the other hand, perhaps that person was simply trying to lure another Comrade who may be a double agent into accidentally exposing him/her/it-self by unwittingly expressing agreement. In that case, the person who initiated use of such epithet will be deemed to have made a sincere effort to smoke-out any trolls on this thread, which would entitle that person to a special reward-- copies of the same DVD's I gave the Queen of England.

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--Fearless Leader

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Fearless Leader wrote: Now I did notice that someone in this thread lapsed into a thought-crime by using the epithet "Unable" to implicitly identify me.
--Fearless Leader
You are perhaps to mean me comrade? Simply a test...just a test
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But I watching you with one eye still, no?

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Comrades,

We cannot allow this faulty premise to be foisted upon us. It says "Cain is Able".

These are two separate people. Able died as the result of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Able was on the infield where Cain took batting practice at a set time each day.
He was following through on a Home run hit when Able's head broke the plane of his swing and the club he was using for a bat. End of story.

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How can this be??!! I THOUGHT WE OWNED ALL THE BLACK PEOPLES... PEOPLES OF COLOR??!!! How did this man slip by our check list at the maternity ward exit?! Who is the Czar in charge of this? I demand an explanation! If this were to keep up, why, these peoples might see the light... learn some things.... vote Rethuglican!!!

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Comrades,

This is only one of our poor, oppressed Black minorities who would defy the Party!

Here is an even scarier example; a USSA Congressman/Ex-Military man to boot! (Do I ever like this guy!) https://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/06/us/p ... house.html

TRAITORS! UNCLE TOMS! AFTER ALL THE PARTY HAS DONE FOR THEM! HOW DARE THEY!!
(
spits on the ground and furiously waves his pistolas in the air...... We must stop this insurrection now, before even more of our collective gets wind that we are not really in control of their thoughts after all.)

TO THE BARRICADES TROOPS! ImageImageWE SHALL CRUSH THIS DISSENTING GROUP OF.... (SPITS AND STARTS FOAMING AT THE MOUTH AND SCREAMING INCOHERENTLY ) "INDIVIDUALS" LIKE THE LITTLE BUGS THEY ARE!

NOW WHERE IN THE BLOODY HELL IS RED STAR AND HIS HOOLIGANS....errr....I meant Storm Troopers??? as he rushs towards the Party Armory to load up on ammo, clutching his cellphone and checking his GPS position. WTF.....am I all alone out here????
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Relax Che, that Allen West person who calls himself "Colonel" like some antebellum plantation owner or fried chicken magnate (apologies to our Colonel of some chubby caliber) is nothing but a racist Islamophobe. I expect some of our Mooslimic brothers from the hood (aka: Muslim Brotherhood) will find a way to behead him like a Danish cartoonist.

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Comrade Whoopie wrote:Relax Che, that Allen West person who calls himself "Colonel" like some antebellum plantation owner or fried chicken magnate (apologies to our Colonel of some chubby caliber) is nothing but a racist Islamophobe. I expect some of our Mooslimic brothers from the hood (aka: Muslim Brotherhood) will find a way to behead him like a Danish cartoonist.

aaaakkkkk! Is not the term "fried chicken" on the DO NOT SAY list, put out by Pres. Michelle and dear Leader?! Is this not offensive in the highest of offensiveness? That's like saying noticing that Pres. MO didn't plant watermelon in her government cared for garden. It is JUST IS NOT DONE.

And secondly, we must consider not ruffling the feathers of upsetting our dear own Red Rooster. The last time that happened, the barnyard private abodings of all Party Members were covered in pellets & feathers.

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Cain is becoming more Able by the day to pose a danger to our Progressive Agenda:








Is there nothing we can do to discredit him? We've tried calling him an "Uncle Tom," but he laughs it off-- it just slides right off his back.


--Fearless Leader

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Is permission to say poultry sauteed on vegetables oil, no?

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Tovarichi wrote:Is permission to say poultry sauteed on vegetables oil, no?


You are correct-- Part of what makes Cain so Able to defeat me, Fearless Leader, is that HE is utterly FEARLESS-- He's not even afraid to profess his enjoyment of Fri_d Chic_en (I just can't make myself say it).

Dangerous he is, I tell you. We must find a way to discredit him. Aren't there some lawyers who can show up with clients who suffered severe disabilities as a result of eating Godfather Pizza contaminated (on purpose, of course) with something such as plutonium? We own the legal profession. Why are they still sitting on their asses?


--Fearless Leader

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Comrade Fearless Leader, Pizza with plutonium is considered Japanese food, our glorious party not have the demographic supportings of enough Asian Peoples to bother with such, until borrowing more money from China, who does not like Japanese anyway.

Mr. Cain should not concern the leadership. As stated, he has parents, probably both of same ethnic background. Is material for fundraising autobiography at this? NYET! Can Cain sink 3-pointer of Basketballing or golfs at Par? Nyet. Consider others-- The Mormon who built prototype of Peoples Healthcare in Caliphate of Massachusets? NYET! Mormon's twin sister from Alaska? same again. What of Rush Limbaugh sock-puppet Gingrich? more of same. Cream rises to top, the best they could field was McCain, Examine--who holds keys to "house of color not to be mentioned" (OK, you don't either, but should). Headliners are only good for fundraisers.

Have Stazi watch for unskilled teabagger bitter clinger corn-fed native born citizen with birth certificate from flyover country, has no political training, no leadership ability, no blemishes on pedigree, can read and sound convincing, who pays no attention in same church for 20 years to pastor who marries wife and baptizes children into religion he does not "actually" follow. THIS will be dangerous man worthy of concern. (sounds all too familiar, no?)

Fear not, citizens die each day, moving to the rolls of loyal party voters. Elderly and insane citizens are easy prey for ACORN to "assist" to voting booth. Military Absentee ballots are still in warehouses waiting to be applied when needed. Homeless are easily persuaded with bus-ride in air conditioned busses and promise of Cheeseburger.

The Party stays strong, the opposition even lacks bumper stickers of "hope" or "change." Continue to promise two beets in every pot and a loaf of brown bread at market, the sheeple will follow with no questionings.

Dear leader worries too much. Perhaps vacation is in order?

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I repeat what I said: Cain is Able to lure minorities from progressivism and without alienating South Carolina Crackers-- He's very dangerous Comrades. And to make it even worse, he's able to describe his tax plan as a "Fair Tax." We must stop him.








--Fearless Leader


 
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